I Get Angry At Skinny Banders!

[u4leigh 7]

I suspect when you reach 199, you'll be happy but inclined to go further. I have relatives who hit nearly 400lbs and had no intention of getting any bigger, PARTICULARLY when I am nearly 37yrs old and have been on beta blockers for blood pressure since I was 25 and at risk for type II diabetes. We are all trying to be healthier, so it serves to anger "skinny bandsters" when their efforts are poo-poo'ed by those who started at much higher weights. It's also quite common that folks, like me, who were banded at ~200 started out higher and paid for the surgery out of pocket as a reward for getting down that low from a higher weight. For the record, I'm 5'5", try to be encouraging to everyone, and assume negativity I could have toward anyone on this journey could be better directed at someone else, like criminals or general jackarses.

Saying skinny bandsters are infuriating is the same as saying bigger bandsters waited too long... it doesn't really help anyone either way. LB for folks less than 35BMI was just approved by the FDA in early 2011, so that is why there seem to be more and more skinny bandsters. I suspect some with >35BMI would've had the surgery sooner if it had been available to them in the US. I had no idea at a BMI of ~33-34 that I was eligible until I was reading something else from the FDA. I was tentative, but really happy to have the opportunity to improve my health with this tool! We could all get mad at the real skinnies who lost so much they need to re-gain some, but their struggles are just as real as everyone else's and their mental and physical health just as important, so they need to share and get encouragement as well! Happy health everyone!

[lorena st 33]

Sorry, this is going to be a bit of a lecture....Actually, you need to worry about your weight and your goals and not spend your time obsessing about other peoples issues. I have a hard time understanding why you would be angry at anyone who wants to lose weight and the methods they use to do it. Surgery is ususally a last ditch effort for most people on this site, having failed at most other diets (and doesn't really matter what their starting weight was as long as their surgeon feels that this procedure is warranted). So I would hope you would be understanding, not condemn someone for being at a starting weight you have a problem with. And the band is not the easy way out, the process is long, difficult and time consuming and has risks associated with it. The lapband is not for someone who is unmotivated, lazy or weak. Try to remember that and maybe your attitude will change.

[#MagicWithinme 173]

I know for myself when I started this process I didn't think I weighed enough. Simply because I didn't look big. But the scale said different. and of course what people would say when I would tell them I was thinking of getting lapband, oh you dont need it you arent that big. I went to seminars and saw people larger than me and Im sure they asked themselves what was I doing there. Maybe I didn't look big, but the extra weight I carried brought on so many health problems that my quality of life sucked. I went throught the process of labs, therapists, nutritionists and seriously at every one, I expected one to say oh you don't need it. But every door was open everyone was encouraging and even though I chickened out the first date of surgery I went through the 2nd time.I was in a better frame of mind, and so ready to loose weight that I have followed drs restrictions to the T and have been lucky to have lost a good amount of weight so far. Yes Im having problems right now with the right foods, eough Proteins, but I now know Im not the only one and that helps in itself to know and speaking for myself, I still have alot of insecurities, alot of doubts but I know that I chose the right path, and the way my body feels is telling me so. And I will continue on this path and I hope you do too, don't worry about anybody else, this is your journey.

[Miss Meow 12]

I understand where you are coming from. I guess I could be in the category of a "skinny" bandster. One of my fears was that I was going to be turned away once I got to Mexico for surgery. But my BMI was at 35 and I had sleep apnea and other health issues. I had another friend who did it who was the same weight as me. She said a lot of people judged her but she doesn't care now because she finally is happy and content with herself.

I am afraid to tell a lot of my family and friends because of the fear of being judged. That I wasn't heavy enough and I should have just tried to eat right and exercise on my own. Because you know I haven't thought of that or tried those things yet.

All I know if I thought about my weight probably 100 times a day. I refused to be in pictures and was so embarrassed about my weight that I opted out of an all class high school reunion. I guess I was going to be judged by my weight either way and at least with the band I will look good.

[Cocoabean 430]

Feelings are what they are. Personally, I don't care if you don't like that on my surgery day I weighed in at 202 lbs. I was obese. Based on my height a normal BMI is around 150 lbs.

I just hope you don't let your feelings stop you from being successful!

[rae.holmes 12]

I want to thank you to those positive post, you understood what I was saying. I regret the title of my topic. And I want to apologize at those to were offended by what I said. I never meant that those who weight -200 didnt have the right to be banded or was personally angry at such banders.

I was 448 pre liquid diet. I was 434 on surgery day. And I will have my one week weigh in on Monday. I am 5'11 and jeans size 32.

My goal is to be down to a size 20, and at size 20 I was close to 200. I didnt mean to hurt other people its just I am a cup half empty type person when it comes to my weight loss. And y'all are right I am very jealous and envious to those who weight 199, because I haven't seen that number since I was in middle school.

I was frustrated and typed without forethought!

I'm sorry

[123crod 170]

I think we need to realize people have many reasons for have WLS. Some have really bad medical problems already and some are headed that way. We should not judge people for their starting weight or ending weight. It is what feels comfortable for them or their Drs.

I really would like to get to my goal, yes I am 84 lbs skinner, but would still be so much more happier with even less weight to carry around. I am not sure why I have not made it to my goal, is it the fat person inside of me that keeps me form completing the task or that am just willing to settle for almost there? That my problem. My Dr has told me I have succeeded what the Band promised and he is pleased, but I still want that next 15 or 20 lbs to be gone for my journey to really be over. I am working on that, but does not mean I am not happy when others lost all their weight, if it was only 40 lbs or 200 lbs.

It does not make me mad that people made it to their goal no matter what size they were when they started, the heaviest do not own the right to WLS. I am glad that the FDA lowered the BMI because why should people have to wait until they did so much damage to their body before getting help.

Also just because smaller people are getting surgery now does not mean their struggle is or was any easier than ours because we started at a heavier point.

But I also want to say that this thread was probably started out of frustration, you know the grass is always greener thing. So I think we are being too hard on her and should try to understand where she is coming from and not be so defensive. If I had posted that and got all these responses I would never post again and that is not what this place is about, it is about us helping and guiding people with the knowledge that we have learned, about helping people keep their heads up and on move on down the road. So many people have been so nice to me here and answered my numerous questions some dumb, some answered so many times but still answered once more for me. So I say we should not judge others for their reason for having WLS, but maybe we need to remember it is a daily, sometimes hourly struggle for some and give them a break when they vent their frustrations.

Sorry to ramble on

Cheri

[123crod 170]

Sorry my post is always too late.

Cheri

[shrinkAdink_05/10 4]

I want to thank you to those positive post, you understood what I was saying. I regret the title of my topic. And I want to apologize at those to were offended by what I said. I never meant that those who weight -200 didnt have the right to be banded or was personally angry at such banders.

I was 448 pre liquid diet. I was 434 on surgery day. And I will have my one week weigh in on Monday. I am 5'11 and jeans size 32.

My goal is to be down to a size 20, and at size 20 I was close to 200. I didnt mean to hurt other people its just I am a cup half empty type person when it comes to my weight loss. And y'all are right I am very jealous and envious to those who weight 199, because I haven't seen that number since I was in middle school.

I was frustrated and typed without forethought!

I'm sorry

Don 't be sorry Getting it all out there is how you "get it all out". So what, no big deal...you say what you feel and others help you overcome those issues by being brutally honest. (Sugar coating anything will never solve a problem as we have all figured out pounds later LOL)

I happen to think you are a beautiful girl and think you are going to be shocked at how quickly life will change for you. You will look, feel and think differently more and more as time goes on and making posts like this will help you learn and grow as your body and mind are changing.

Don't ever be sorry for being yourself! Learning to love yourself comes with the journey and everyday it gets easier and easier as you get skinnier and skinner

Good luck my friend, I'll be watching you

[u4leigh 7]

Girl you are one TALL drink of water! At 5'11", when (not if) you get to 200, you're gonna look fantastic!!! Keep in mind all those 5'2" 200lb gals wish they had 9 more inches of legs! I'm 5'4.5" and I cling to that extra 0.5 inch! I shrank after back surgery, which is another good reason for me to not carry a spare tire around the middle. The good news is, you're on your way!

[NWgirl 574]

I think we all understand what the meaning behind the original post is- WISHING that you were at the 199 and not the 250, 300, or 350's. It's almost the same as having skinny friends who always complain about how "fat" they are. Other than being insulting, you just want to wack them upside the head because they are not fat.

I had a friend in high school that was probably on the lower BMI for her height and had always been a skinny girl and would literally grab at skin (not fat, skin) and complain she was fat. That was always infuriating, having the 120lb girl tell the 220lb girl she was fat...

[jennifer1 180]

i understand what your saying and you are entitiled to your opinion. i started at 242 and wore 18/20 and most of my friends thought i didnt need the surgery. well it wasnt about what anyone else thought. i used to be jealous of the people who lost without getting fills, or people who dropped like 50 pounds in 6 months or shorter, but then i realized I'm me and they are them. my journey is my own and i take responsibility for it. once again you are entitiled to feel how you do cuz feelings are real. Best wishes on your journey!

[Army's girl 4]

EVERYONE is entitled to feel however they feel about themselves & they can chose to describe themselves as cows weighing 199 standing 5'4!!! I mean geez who the heck is anyone to tell other people how to feel or how much they should or shouldn't weight or when they should or shouldn't get the band or ANY other typpe of surgery??!!

I'm 5'3 and my weight was 180 when I decided to regain control of my health, my body & my life!!! Now I'm weighing 157 & I still have 35lbs to go to get to my goal weight. Do I care that someone bigger is mad because I CHOSE to not let myself get outta control b4 doing something about it? NOPE cuz no one here pays my bills or has top live inside MY body but me. So to all those low BMI people that got banded, doodles to you all!! I commend you for getting a jump start!

If ur "friends" act distant & isoated, blow it off or away lol.... Do you!!

[Toddy 758]

Don't judge someone's reasons for choosing to be banded until you've walked in their shoes! One reason I haven't told people I got banded is because the typical reaction would be that I'm not big enough. But I have a very small frame with a congenital spine defect and have been in terrible pain for years that was only getting worse. No one other than immediate family knows about my issues with the pain because I don't like to complain!! If I had not had this surgery, I could see myself being confined to a "jazzy chair" within the next 10 - 15 years! That is not how I want to live my life. I thank God this surgery was available to me and I am already noticing a decrease in my chronic pain! DON'T JUDGE!!

[twi 40]

Don't get too upset with her' date=' she said she knows it's stupid and wrong, what she's thinking. I have thought about this many times. I think it is harder when you have less to lose, because it usually comes off slower and can be more challenging. I'm so mad at myself that I let myself get up to 263 before being banded...when I get under that 200 lb mark, you're all gonna hear about it! [/quote']

True!