Cocoabean 430 Posted January 22, 2012 What TWI said, tell one person and you've told a bunch. I chose to be open about my surgery. I didn't announce I was having it done, but as I lost people asked how I was doing it (as they always will). So, after I'd told one or two people at work, others would approach saying, "I heard you had lap band surgery!" Granted, those I told were not asked to keep it quiet. Also, when eating in a group and I experience trouble, I prefer to just tell people rather than prevaricating. But that is me. It would be just as easy to say I am not feeling well, or I am not very hungry. Each of us will figure out what works. The only person I did NOT want to know was my MIL. She was a worrier and would never let the topic rest. If I had a cold, she'd ask me about it each time I saw her for the next 3 months. I get Migraines, I take meds daily to prevent them, but still have them sometimes. Each visit I got the 3rd degree about my migraines and why couldn't they stop them, why did I need to take so much medication for them? What causes them? Why can't they cure them? Yeah, ain't going there with the band. I think she had a suspicion though. She'd seen me go through multiple diets and failures. Then saw me be successful without my talking about it. All she ever said was you look great! The woman who used to try to drag me onto a scale to see how much I weighed when I was at my peak. She never once asked how I was doing it. So, perhaps a SIL told her and explained I wanted it keep it private...dunno. She passed last April without it ever becoming an issue. Bless her heart. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
54Shirley 105 Posted January 22, 2012 This I have answered many times. When I was first banded, I spread the good word. As a fellow Bandster said above "there's nothing to be ashamed of." how true. You have a vision problem you get glasses, hearing problem maybe a aid. weight problem they want you to diet ! or you are a failure ! I heard that at work, and at home. So when we moved I didn't tell anyone but a waitress in a Restaurant, and she does not crucify me. She likes to see the success. So now I don't tell the world what's my business. Only the world that is on this site. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Holly Dolly 575 Posted January 22, 2012 Ive already gotten the "are you crazy" from my two best friends for considering it. Ill have to ask my mother questions since she had a gastric bypass and worked in the medical field. Im sure she will tell the whole entire family if I choose to do it, but I wouldnt want anyone in my business either! Your friends are just gonna be jealous if you do! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Banterwonder 63 Posted January 22, 2012 Just told my husband. No one else needs to know. This is a private matter. No one needs to know. I think in general, we feel pressured to share with everyone, friends, family, co-workers. And sometimes we feel the need to share with complete strangers very intimate details of our lives. My weight and my health are topics that only my husband needs to know about. If anyone questions my weight loss, I will say , "thank you". I am not telling my mom, as she will spread it throughout the known world. Same with co-workers. I work in a relatively small workplace, and word travels amazingly fast. 1 Flaquita24 reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
newme2012 31 Posted January 26, 2012 Of course this was a discussion for the husband and I. I have told 2 of my sisters, one friend who is also intrested in the surgery, and one who has undergone WLS. I finally decided in December 2011 I am ready for a change! And I only have two more appointments to attend and I can schedule... So I'm super excited. But I also feel its strictly on a need to know, and my sisters were proof because neither one of them want me to go through with it, but this is for me so I'm pushing forward!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mizpk83 9 Posted January 26, 2012 Hi... I actually told my close family who was very supportive. I also told 2 of my close friends when I mentioned it to others I received negative feedback...so with that being said I'm not telling anyone else... I figure it's known of their business. 1 sweetsoutherngirl reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
journey4me 23 Posted January 26, 2012 I hadn't told many people before surgery just a coworker and a best friend. Right before surgery I decided to tell my Children. I have a teenage Daughter and didn't want to set what might been looked at as bad eating habit (because if she didn't know why I wasn't eating, I didn't want to set a bad example) I was in pre-op at hospital and I wouldn't have told my sister, but My Dad thought I was going in for heart surgery and he called her and I had to let her know that's not what was going on..so I just told her! My Dad is staying with me so I told him when I told the kids. MENTAL NOTE-If you do not want people to know something...Do Not....I repeat Do Not.....tell someone with intermittent Altzheimers! (That would be my Dad. Who I think he told the world, oh well cats out of the bag now! Good Luck! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ready for my journey to be 14 Posted January 27, 2012 the only people that know iam having wls is my husband,one sister-in-law and a cousin.that is it my co-workers think im having a hiatial hernia fixed which is true but they dont know the extra,my mom had bypass about 10 yrs ago and had many complications and i was dead set against it so maybe im being a lil cautious as far as her finding out but . she also is dealing with my dads health issues right now..heck since the wl is slow an steady she will think the diet an gym r working again i lost 65lbs on my own when she went through her wls well cant wait till tuesday !!!!!1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mrs. Curtis 42 Posted February 9, 2012 I have only shared with 2 friends who have had surgery (either band or bypass) and of course close family. I feel like others on here that to me, this is a personal thing and want to be a journey that I can enjoy instead of thinking about the opinion of others about my choice- 1 sweetsoutherngirl reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
running_scared 125 Posted February 10, 2012 I'm starting to think that I might have a lot of really supportive people around me, and that maybe I should tell a few more of them. So far, I have only told DH (obviously, lol) my BFF, a friend who has announced that he is getting banded the week after I am, and another really good friend. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lap_of_luxury 7 Posted February 10, 2012 I was selective in who I told, but brace yourself for lots of judgement and advice. I am one week post now and I am telling people I work with that I had hernia surgery. People have their own fears and agendas and they will try to force them on you. It is hard enough to make this decision and as long as those closest to you support you, that is all you need. Of course, in the future, if an overweight friend asks, I will probably tell them what I did. Good luck. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites