skinnymini 0 Posted February 17, 2006 Ok family.... it's the morning of surgery and as I sit here at 6:20 AM EST, I think about, of course dying. What a morbid subject. I mean I watch my 2 year old son sleeping in his crib and I couldn't imagine not seeing his face ever again. Tears are brimming my eyes as we speak. And as I blink them back, I tell myself that only less than 1% die from this surgery. I have over a 99% chance of coming home tomorrow. I have a greater chance dying on the way to the hospital or on the way back or a couple of weeks from now from god knows what. Ok. No more talk of dying. I'm gaining a new life here. I still don't feel nervous so don't take that rant above as nervousness. Just reality checking. However, the real reality of the situation is that I weight approx. 320 lbs at 24 years old. I have a 2 year old, and a husband of going on 3 years now. I want more kids!! well atleast 1 more will do. I want a daughter. I want to finish school, I want to earn more money. So the bigger picture here is not dying, but what I have to live for. My hopes and dreams, my goals and aspirations. If I only concentrate on dying, how can I see those things through? How did I become so pessimistic all of a sudden. Probably from listening to my husband, he is the president of the Pessimistic states of Pessimistica. :haha: Yea I know humor this early in the morning, from me? Who knew. Anyway, I will take the optimistic traits of my fellow bandsters and role models. I will not let this get me down, I too will lose 100 lbs or more at my 2 year bandversary. I will look great, feel great and great things are only accomplished from a great attitude. Isn't that great? OK, OK. I guess I'm done ranting and raving. I'll see you guys on the loser side. I will update as soon as we get home on Saturday. And as I approach this fork in the road, I will take the lighter side toward a new me, and leave that dark half behind right where it belongs. :love: Marcelle Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
K@t 38 Posted February 17, 2006 Good luck and a speedy recovery!! Were all thinking of you! :clap2: Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Iluvharleys 15 Posted February 17, 2006 Good luck! Post and let us know how you're doing when you can. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NJChick 3 Posted February 17, 2006 Oh good luck today and congratulations !!!!! You'll be okay... We all have the same thoughts as you, its only human. Hugs and kisses !!! See you later Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SherryW 4 Posted February 17, 2006 Good luck and best wishes! I just had my surgery this past Monday and had exactly the same thoughts except my son is going to be 16....we're mom's we always worry about them You'll be fine and dandy and on the losing side before you know it. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
HarleyNana 10 Posted February 17, 2006 Wish you the best on your new journey. Walk, walk, walk, helps the healing process. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CCBSTX 0 Posted February 17, 2006 Many prayers going your way! Come back and post to let us know how things are going! Shawn Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
donali 57 Posted February 17, 2006 Best wishes on an uneventful surgery!! I always think those same morbid thoughts each time I've gone under the knife. I left a last will and testament before my gallbladder removal - my first surgery ever. You'll be back in the saddle again before you know it!! xxoo Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
leighhoffman 0 Posted February 17, 2006 :clap2: You are in my thoughts and prayers. I was soooo nervous when I went in for my surgery. Take it easy and make sure you are walking! It's only down from here!!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NeenBand 7 Posted February 17, 2006 Wishing you well and speedy healing! Your probably recovering as I post this.:-) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sunta 5 Posted February 17, 2006 I relate sooooo so so much to your post, I can't even tell you... I too have these exact same thoughts. I want the surgery to be over so badly so I can stop worrying about it. I have this great, fantastic, amazing, incredible life, and I am so scared that it could all just end because of a bad decision I made. To combat these thoughts, I focus on the fact that if I don't do it, my life is not going to be so great in the future being so heavy. I will have an enormous host of health problems and probably be shortening my life a great deal if I don't lose this weight. Keep us posted! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PhotoNut 7 Posted February 17, 2006 Bye the time you read this, you will probably already be banded.. a bit sore.. grateful to be drinking and full of questions. So, first of all.. Grats on crossing over to the "other side" of bandland! And secondly, I hope you have a speedy recovery. Remember to sip slowly, get lots of rest, eat (drink) your Protein, and walk as much as you can to get that gas cleared out. You're wonderful life is just about to become more wonderful! Cheers! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Anwyn 0 Posted February 17, 2006 Marcelle, remember - you're doing this FOR your son and your DH. It's the most unselfish decision you can make. Good luck to you today! (((HUGS))) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dishdiva 5 Posted February 17, 2006 Marcelle -- Many of shared your fears...their normal! Can't wait to hear how things went. God bless. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tricia K. 0 Posted February 18, 2006 Has anyone heard from Marcelle? I tried calling the 2 numbers last night that she provided on obesityhelp.com but the calls would not go through. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
