Personal Decision to Discuss

[cashley 0]

I know it's a personal decision to discuss this with family, friends, co-workers etc. and I'm wondering how you all have handled it? If you decided to lie how did that go... I know lie sounds like a drastic word but that's what I feel like.

I just got banded and my job as a consultant keeps me on the go with hunderds of clients. They all are asking "Where you've been... what's going on? Are you ok?" since I've been out for a week. I assist with Payroll software and work from home so I've been trying to call them back as I feel up to it. But they are nosy...

I mostly wanted to tell only family and close friends but I hate to lie too.... Peope come right out and ask the most direct questions.... "What kind of surgery did you have? Ohhhh lap band - You don't need that" Or if I tell them I've just been sick or had a hernia repaired. (actually I did have that during my lapband)

So I'm curious to reactions you've had both positive and negative.

[banded_for_life 2]

I told everybody...probably more than they ever wanted to know about lapband...so I am no help.

[Julie* 0]

My husband, parents, sister, and best friend know. Other than that everyone thinks I am having a hiatal hernia repaired. (semi-truth, LOL) I have a 10 day liquid diet and I needed that to be out in the open at work so I just explained that it was part of the fix for the hernia.

[PhotoNut 7]

I have told my closest friends and family. My co-workers know because Dawg didnt think I'd mind.. and I don't.. now. *snickers*

I told a complete stranger at the grocery store the other day.

I think the longer I have it, the more I am comfortable about letting people know about it. But then, I haven't run in to insensative jerks who treat me like a loser who couldn't do it on my own. Others here have.

[edazul 0]

Cashley,

I agree with you, this is a personal matter, but I understand about the nosy people. I for one only told my closest friends and family members, but they took it at their on liberty to tell their friends and aquiantances, at first it was a little humilating, since the calls started coming and some from people I did not even know knew with questions like "Did it hurt?, How much do you weigh?, Why did you go to Mexico?, When will you start:Banane40: loosing, after already loosing 15lbs? Did you try Nutri-Sytem?," and all of these other questions that I did not feel I need to answer. - but now it has been 4 months and I have lost 35lbs and I feel great. If I could do it all over again I would have told nobody and lied, but it is at your sole discretion, I just wanted to tell you what it was like for me. Hope this helps you any, just try to overlook the dumb questions people might ask you as they do not know better, especially the nosy ones -and by the way have a Happy Valentines

[cashley 0]

My husband, parents, sister, and best friend know. Other than that everyone thinks I am having a hiatal hernia repaired. (semi-truth, LOL) I have a 10 day liquid diet and I needed that to be out in the open at work so I just explained that it was part of the fix for the hernia.

That's exactly what I'm telling most people especially customers I'm not close with.

Actually the more I think about it the more I may want to tell people... because I don't want to hear "See I told you that you coudl do it if you just put your mind to diet and exercise"

When I start losing I'd just scream if I hear people say that....

It always seems people don't beleive you when you say "Diet and Exercise" didn't work for me... Surgery isn't a cope out for me I felt it the only way.

[cashley 0]

Cashley,

I agree with you, this is a personal matter, but I understand about the nosy people. I for one only told my closest friends and family members, but they took it at their on liberty to tell their friends and aquiantances, at first it was a little humilating, since the calls started coming and some from people I did not even know knew with questions like "Did it hurt?, How much do you weigh?, Why did you go to Mexico?, When will you star loosing, after already loosing 15lbs? Did you try Nutri-Sytem?," and all of these other questions that I did not feel I need to answer. - but now it has been 4 months and I have lost 35lbs and I feel great. If I could do it all over again I would have told nobody and lied, but it is at your sole discretion, I just wanted to tell you what it was like for me. Hope this helps you any, just try to overlook the dumb questions people might ask you as they do not know better, especially the nosy ones -and by the way have a Happy Valentines

Yeah - That's a big issue because sometimes you just don't have time for all the dumb questions from people liket that...

So far when I have told people I get "I don't think you need that why don't you just diet?"

[Kryssa 1]

I told everyone at work I was feeling bad the week I had surgery. And when the weight loss becomes noticable I plan on telling them that I'm eating alot less and exercising more. It's the truth and the details are nobody's business unless I want to share.

[princess_n_thep 2]

I like the hernia operation story. It is true and your not lying that way. If you don't want to share, then tell them that. But remember, if you tell some but not others, the word will get out and you will feel awkward. I don't talk about it at all to ignorant people. If they really want to know about the procedure I will tell them but I will NOT debate it or justify myself as it was my decision with my body. And if someone says something negative, I tell them just that, very bluntly. They get the hint. I have been called a bitch because of it but honestly, I don't really care what they think if they are that nosey and inconsiderate.

[La_madam 20]

I told everybody...probably more than they ever wanted to know about lapband...so I am no help.

_____

Ditto for me too

[j.s. 0]

I have told lots of people. I have had nothing but support from my family and friends and work people. Not one time have I heard negativity. I do not hide it, nor do I flaunt it, it just is. People know I have issues with some stuff, like if we are going to dinner, they may ask if I can eat this or that, I will answer yes or on occasion it has been no, and I have been glad they asked before hand rather than making them feel bad because it was something I could not tolerate. The people I know dont make such a big deal of it, or maybe I dont, not sure which it is but being upfront seems to work for me.

[Paulax 8]

I think that it is a personal decision. I have a friend who is open and honest with EVERYONE who asks. She is so confident and proud of her accomplishments and she is spreading the word.

I am an introvert, I don't plan on telling ANYONE other than my immediate family and very close friends who also have weight problems. Other than that, at the risk of sounding like Star Jones, it is nobody else's business. If I met someone who was struggling with weight, and it would benefit someone from knowing, I'd share my story.

I don't plan on telling my children, age 6, 8 and 11. Again unless it would benefit them to know. At these ages it may confuse them or scare them. I don't want to do that.

As for explaining my weight loss. I haven't figured out how to respond yet. I will read here to get ideas. I feel it would be honest to say Portion Control and exercise.

BTW, I am pre op, and those are my feelings now. I can see that like, Photonut, I might feel more open to discuss it as time goes on.

[Jill_S 1]

About 3 years ago, when I first started considering surgical options for my weight loss, I discussed it with my husband and my parents. All three were dead set again a by-pass, so it wasn't until a friend of mine had a band done 2 years ago that I finally got them turned around.

Since then, the only people I've told are close friends, and my boss. Some of my family knows (from my parents), and some don't. I personally haven't told anyone - not because I'm ashamed, but just because it hasn't come up. If it does, I'll tell them. This little piece of plastic inside me is something I'm very happy for.

It's a personal decision, and I tend to think that folks who keep their private lives private would be most apt to keep the band private, too.

[casinocat74 0]

I told EVERYONE!!! I was proud of myself so I guess I wanted to share it. But you do whatever you feel is best for you! Good luck!

[leatha_g 4]

I told. That way I don't have to worry about tripping up somewhere or coming clean later.

When people ask too much too often, I just shut them down after awhile, but mostly, I found myself educating people about the band. Most often, they were asking questions because they were curious and maybe needing it themselves.