the 'why can't you just lose the weight normaly' question...

[Rachel412 116]

Is your dad paying for the band? Do you live with him? Are you a minor? If the answer to all of these is no, you need to just tell him you're not having the surgery and then go ahead and do it anyway. if the answer to those questions is yes, he has the right to give you crap about your current weight and health.

[honk 780]

If you were addicted to cocaine would he tell you to just figure this addiction stuff out on you own with no medical assistance? I would guess not. This is a long term solution. Most of us can loose weight the question is can we keep it off forever.

[lorena st 33]

Ask your dad to define "normal"? I assume the normal way is to exercise and count calories. If you are like most people on this site, you have tried and failed (usually numerous times) at normal. As Cindy C stated earlier, yoyo dieting is very harmful to your physical, and I would add, mental health. At this point you are choosing to be healthy over normal. Perhaps in 6 months to a year, when you have successfully lost weight, your family will be more supportive of your choices. If not, you will have to wonder why they would prefer you to be obese and "normal".

[Jachut 487]

I really believe there is truth to the theorybthatbour body has a setpoint, a weight it gets used to. So no matter how dedicated, how clever you are at losing weight, its going to go back on. Yes, part if that has to do with how motivation wanes over time, you get complacent etc, but a big part is your body fighting to get back to its "normal".

After keeping the weight off for several years now, i do feel like my setpoint as been reset, i was amazed to not gain weight during nine months unfilled, but no doubt about it, it was work of a level i could not maintain for life, no way!

[Poodlelover56 2]

pendulum,

I don't know if this is true for every bandsters, but this has been my personal experience. I have been on every diet out there and yeah, i've lost weight on them, but gained it all back. those other diets i have been on have been diets in every since of the word. counting calories, restricting what i eat, staying away from certain trigger foods and all the while on those diets, i was STARVING. hunrgy all the time, but denying myself food.

What the band has done for me is it has somehow supressed that hunger and the desire to just eat and eat and eat. I think some people have mentioned that it affects the Vagas nerve and that might be what is happening.

i haven't had any fills and i'm 6 months out, so i have virtually zero restriction, but i haven't needed because the urge to eat has left me. i don't think about food 24/7 like i did.

i was a bulk eater, not really a grazer, so it's true that even with no restriction i can't just sit down and eat 2 or 3 plates of food like I used to be able to do, but truthfully, i don't even want to do that. whether it's the placement of the band or some signal it is sending to my brain, i have not had obsessive thoughts about food for 6 months. i didn't realize how much food took occupied almost every waking thought i had until the thoughts kind of went away.

so, long story short, unlike most bandsters, i really don't follow a diet. i try to stay away from bread, Pasta and rice, but every once in a while i might feel like eating a burger. i'll just go get a burger, eat it and then i'm satisfied and done with burgers for a while. I don't deny myself any food that i want to eat, i just eat a smaller portion of it, or enough to get the taste of it and then i'm done, no more obsessing over it. so far, even at only 6 months out, i have been more successful than any other diet i have ever been on.

why? well, i'm not physically hungry.

also, i don't feel like i'm cheating since i am essentially NOT dieting, but rather, eating what i think NORMAL people eat. if i go out with my skinny friends, we order stuff, i eat what i can and notice that i'm naturally stopping when they are stopping too...i don't just keep eating and then pick stuff off of their plates. also, when i eat something non-diety, i do not feel guilty.

i originally got the band because i just didn't want to GAIN any more weight. i didn't know if i would be successful, but i wanted to stop eating and eating and eating. i had no idea that it would help curb my appetite and help me stop thinking about food non-stop, but it has done that for me.

i have a long way to go and i may never get there, but i know that instead of thinking about what my next meal is, i'm thinking about making plans to hang out with friends, or go out in public, or try a new hobby. food isn't the center of my world any longer.

when your family asks, tell them that this tool is also about supressing appetite. a diet can't do that. you can restrict yourself and eat only the right things, but you'll always be hungry and you could snap at any moment and go back to the old way of doing things. that's why diets fail. you can't stick to a 'lifestyle change' forever if you are hungry and thinking about food all of the time. you just can't. you'd be miserable. hopefully, the band will work this way for you too...give you not only the restriction (if you want it) to be able to physically not eat a lot of food, but also give you that mental willpower to be able to say no to food that you are not even hungry for. that's what it has done for me.

i do not regret it one little bit. even if i never lose another pound and stay this size for the rest of my life, i know that i will not be eating and eating and eating.

[Poodlelover56 2]

Dibleydawn. That was so well stated. You echo my sentiments exactly. It IS impossible to have a lifestyle change forever if you are constantly thinking about your next meal, which was me. And most people who have been banded. This is not the easy way out either. I am one month banded and still getting to know my band. I have no fills yet, and am losing steadily so opted for no fill at my appt yesterday. But there are times that I have eaten something I always had before, like almonds, but they don't settle right. So now, having tried them twice, I will stay away from them. But I am very happy to be banded. If I write a book (haha), I think I would title it: "finally released from the bondage of my appetite: memoir of a lap band patient"

[Poodlelover56 2]

I echo your sentiments completely. Well stated! How can any of us foodies have a lifestyle change forever, when all we can think about is our next meal? That is, until we are banded. If I ever write about this experience, I think the title would be : "Finally released from the bondage of my appetite. My experience with lap band surgery".

Arlene from Boston

[Poodlelover56 2]

Sorry, I didn't think my first response went through . Sorry to have repeated myself!

[SkinnyMiniMe 63]

^{When I first mentioned the surgery to my mother (who btw I value her opinion) she really didn't have the raction I thought she would. She always was concerned about my weight so I thought she would instantly approve of my decision. She told me about some negative things about people she knows who has had WLS and were unsuccessful. Then she said you can do it, you've done it before by going to the gym. I explain the procedure to her in detail so she would understand exactly how the Lapband works and I explain that yes I have lost the weight but I keep gaining it back and more. I explained that I am going to workout just as hard but I need to control what I put in my mouth to be successful. If I could do it then it would have already been done. I told her that I almost 40 and I want to enjoy my body and be healthy. Lastly I said to her, next year I want you to look at me and tell me that it was the best decision I made. She knows I am not backing out so now she is on board. Mabe you should just tell your dad you made your mind up. Everytime you tell him you are just going to get information, he thinks there is a glimmer of hope that you will change your mind. If it is your decision he will just have to accept it or move on. My entire life I look for my parents approval but this time I have to do this for myself. Once I made my mind I am decided I wasn't turning back. I thought about getting the lapband last year and tried dieting...here I am 60lbs heavier and getting the surgery. I wasted a year but no longer. Get excited about a new you & Good Luck!!!}