What do you do?

[mytime2shine 1]

My Dad is a loving wonderful man that has always had a gift of "insight". Tonight he tells me that he doesn't want me to get the surgery and doesn't feel good about it. That I should pray to the lord for his help with my weight loss battle and that I am a strong person and that I could do it on my own...my body is a temple and that I shouldn't mess with it. Everything he said is out of love and I respesct and love him so much- now he has put my mind in a bad place. He has me questioning my decision. I truly want to cry!!! I am scheduled for surgery 2 weeks from today!!

[blackcadillacs5 62]

My Dad is a loving wonderful man that has always had a gift of "insight". Tonight he tells me that he doesn't want me to get the surgery and doesn't feel good about it. That I should pray to the lord for his help with my weight loss battle and that I am a strong person and that I could do it on my own...my body is a temple and that I shouldn't mess with it. Everything he said is out of love and I respesct and love him so much- now he has put my mind in a bad place. He has me questioning my decision. I truly want to cry!!! I am scheduled for surgery 2 weeks from today!!

I can see where he is coming from but although I am not a very religious person I believe that GOD will help those that will help themselves. I don't see how just praying for a solution will happen, no offense to you or him. I really think you should think about it some more since his comment shook you up. If you are still serious about it and its what you want then have a sit down with him and truly express how serious you are about this. The surgery is very brief and safe, perhaps he has questions on how its going to turn out and is probably nervous about it. Good luck.

[honk 780]

Please keep in mind I was raised in a very devote home (and attended a very conservative church university). I think your dad is out of line. If you have a stoke tomorrow (like the one I had out of the blue when I was 39)will he tell you not to get treatment becuase your "temple" knows best? I have lost over 100 pounds 3 times in my life and gained it back. Approxemetly 2 % of the people who loose 100 pounds keep it off. So if you went on a diet and lost the weight you are 98% likely to regain.

[bromo 17]

I feel the same way about the band being a medical tool. What about a knee or hip replacement? A rod in the back? A Pacemaker? All those things are alien to our bodies but help people to live a better life. To me a band is no different. It is a tool to help save my life and to live a better one. Perhaps your dad doesn't know enough about the band to make a judgement call like many people who have not looked into it. In the end it is your call what you do with your life.

[lindsayma 1]

My surgery was first scheduled for sept 8th and then rescheduled due to some of my labs. My surgery was going to be Nov 1st. I am a christian and love Jesus with all my heart. was struggling with this too, thinking the same thing that my body is a temple created by God and although I have not took care of it I will now. I never felt at peace about the surgery so I was praying about it and 2 weeks ago I decided not to have the surgery. I feel so peaceful about my decision. I'm praying everyday for strength and wisdom. God heals sickness and diseases so I know He will help me with my weight problem. I completely agree with your dad! My dad was my best friend and I lost him 2 years ago and through all of this I kept asking myself what would my dad tell me. Pray about this before you make a decision. You will know in your heart.

[Corrigan 75]

I can't imagine God ever wanted you to weigh 250 lbs (or whatever).

You have to do whatever is necessary to regain your health.

I'm sure God wants you to be healthy. Best of luck.

[SkinnyMiniMe 63]

Well your body is your temple and right now being obese you are not treating it as such. Also its not like you committing a sin. Maybe it was God you led you to the decision to get the Lapband in the first place. It's not like your removing or rearranging anything. It's a reversible procedure. If you had to have a stint in your artery to your heart would you not put it in and risk a heart attack? If you had to have a knee replacement would not have that either?

For me overeating is an addiction and a disease and I am sure God would want me to rid of disease and live happy and healthy. If I am going against God then I will ask him for forgiveness. In the meantime I am not going to mix religion with medicine. Just me

[mytime2shine 1]

Thank you all for your input!! My dad isn't fanatical or anything his thinking is that I am strong enough to do it on my own and to ask for gods help. He is very strong minded for example he use to smoke and he started having circulation issues so he decided that his smoking could be the cause so he stopped smoking that day and never picked up another cigarette again! That is him and I am me. I have been fighting this battle most of my life and while he has seen me lose 50 pounds over a year ago he also saw me gain it all back and now my health is even more effected. People who have never had a weight problem chalk it up to willpower..motivation and self control. I am a food addict I use food for emotional reasons the emotion is usually stress!! He told me that he is afraid that it would cause me health problems down the road. I asked him to go on the internet and do some research and after that we could talk again. My only fear is something going wrong during the surgery. I have an amazing husband and 3 wonderful daughters and I want to live a long healthy life with them! Thanks for all of your support!!

[mytime2shine 1]

Update- I had a long talk with my dad this morning. Eventhough he doesn't like the idea he does understand my why and I have his full support. That's all I need. Thanks for everyones advice!

[SkinnyMiniMe 63]

GOOD LUCK to you and your Father lol This will bring great things to you and your Father in the near future.

My mother is worried of the unknown and skeptical that this will work since she has seen me try so many things before and go up and down. BUT as I told my mother, I want to hear her say (in the next year or 2) "This was the best thing that you ever did for yourself."

Update- I had a long talk with my dad this morning. Eventhough he doesn't like the idea he does understand my why and I have his full support. That's all I need. Thanks for everyones advice!

[needamulligan 3]

I went to bed last night after reading your post. I was so sad and worried for you. I don't know you but I tossed and turned all night thinking about your dilemma.

I am so glad to see your father is being supportive even though he is going to worry. I am glad he is researching into what exactly your procedure is.

I think we all have the same worries that you do, that something will go wrong. It all seems so drastic and it would be so much easier to just continue life without going to the extremes of going under the knife. But if you didn't do anything and just kept living life as you are now, would you be happy, energetic, live life to the fullest, have self confidence and love yourself just the way you are now. Would you be completely at peace with yourself?! Are you now? And if you bring God into it, think of all you can do and be once you have this (in my case 30 min operation that is 100% reversible) done. I think for those that first hear of slimband or lapband operations they think of it as gastric bi-pass. It's not, this has an escape clause, if it doesn't work for you or you hate it, you can change it, have it removed. BUT... if it works think of all you can be!!

My operation is a month away on Dec 1st, I have a beautiful husband and 4 children. It is a huge decision, but I choose it because I want to BE more, I can live this life only once. I want to live it happy, I want to feel peace and be content. I want to feel comfortable in my own skin. I can't wait to be telling my story a year from now telling people in the pre-op stage it's going to be ok, and it's going to be amazing!

At first I was feeling exactly as you are, then I found this forum and found such inspiration in people's stories. Hang in there, I wish you peace in your decision and all the best. Teresa

[mgmagnolia 1]

I had Lap Band surgery 2 years ago. Your dad is scared because once you have it you are changing your life forever. Your dad loves you so much and he wants to protect you. You will do great. It's hard work, harder than I ever dreamed. It's a tool, not a miracle but it's absolutely, positively worth it! If God doesn't want you to go through with this, He will make sure that you feel it too.

[DawnH 9]

Maybe you can find a support group or something you can take him to with you. My mom (we are also very religious) was super skeptical and worried too but her fears were put to rest when I took her with me to the support group. She asked the post-op people questions and came out knowing this was the thing that would help me. Once she had researched it she has been comfortable with it ever since. Of course it is a surgery so there are always things that can happen but for me my mom knows this was the best decision I have made. Good luck!

[mytime2shine 1]

You all are wonderful! Thank you so much for your support. Dad is ok now. I needed to make sure of that...ya know about Daddies and their girls. I am a big Daddys girl even though my wonderful husband is ok with it I needed to make sure he was also. I am so looking forward to this journey. Yes I did toss and turn last night but I woke up at peace with my decision on excitement for what is to come! Nov 9th is the beginning of my new life! Best of luck to all of you!

[blackcadillacs5 62]

You all are wonderful! Thank you so much for your support. Dad is ok now. I needed to make sure of that...ya know about Daddies and their girls. I am a big Daddys girl even though my wonderful husband is ok with it I needed to make sure he was also. I am so looking forward to this journey. Yes I did toss and turn last night but I woke up at peace with my decision on excitement for what is to come! Nov 9th is the beginning of my new life! Best of luck to all of you!

Congrats! Glad it all worked out...anxiety gets the most of them lol. Keep us updated on your progress...