CPAP, Sleep Apnea, and Frustration Oh My!

[RaleighGal 4]

About 2 months ago, I went for my sleep study...when it was over, they asked me to come back and do the oh so pleasant test again this time hooked up to a CPAP machine. I was mortified! The regular sleep study was stressful enough, and now I need to be hooked up to something else. I went for the second sleep study and requested the same guy to conduct it as my first one (since he was very nice and understanding). As he started to explain what was going to happen...I lost it and started crying. He assured me that it was not going to be as bad as I thought it was. We tried a pillow mask (under the nose) and a small mask that covered my nose fully. Though I liked the comfort of the pillow model, the air pressure was strong. So I went with the small mask. I slept as good as could be expected and felt no different in the morning. So fast forward a few weeks and I am sitting in the medical supply office picking up my CPAP equipment. I got home that night and as I set it up, my husband came in and tried to lighten the mood and make me laugh a bit since he could tell I was very emotional. Again, I started to cry mainly due to the embarrassment of having to use this machine now. I put on the mask that night and woke up with a rash along the sides of my cheeks closest to my nose and pain in my lower eye sockets. I toughed it out for a week and this all continued. I did everything they told me to do when I got the machine...washed my mask daily, set the humidity to 3, filled the Water, etc. I called the medical supplier and we switched to the pillow model which I was finally able to pick up last week (after waiting 2 1/2 weeks). I have not been able to make it a whole night with the pillow mask. I am having severe stress and emotional issues with this machine and having to use it. As positive as I try to be, this is really putting a damper on my self esteem. I know that this is best for my health and long term goals, but I am just so frustrated.

So my questions to you are...

How did you deal with the emotional component of getting the CPAP machine?

What advice can you give me on ways to deal with my stress/emotions when I put my mask on nightly?

Was your sleep apnea reversed after loosing weight?

Do you see a difference using the machine?

[nayttap 4]

About 2 months ago, I went for my sleep study...when it was over, they asked me to come back and do the oh so pleasant test again this time hooked up to a CPAP machine. I was mortified! The regular sleep study was stressful enough, and now I need to be hooked up to something else. I went for the second sleep study and requested the same guy to conduct it as my first one (since he was very nice and understanding). As he started to explain what was going to happen...I lost it and started crying. He assured me that it was not going to be as bad as I thought it was. We tried a pillow mask (under the nose) and a small mask that covered my nose fully. Though I liked the comfort of the pillow model, the air pressure was strong. So I went with the small mask. I slept as good as could be expected and felt no different in the morning. So fast forward a few weeks and I am sitting in the medical supply office picking up my CPAP equipment. I got home that night and as I set it up, my husband came in and tried to lighten the mood and make me laugh a bit since he could tell I was very emotional. Again, I started to cry mainly due to the embarrassment of having to use this machine now. I put on the mask that night and woke up with a rash along the sides of my cheeks closest to my nose and pain in my lower eye sockets. I toughed it out for a week and this all continued. I did everything they told me to do when I got the machine...washed my mask daily, set the humidity to 3, filled the Water, etc. I called the medical supplier and we switched to the pillow model which I was finally able to pick up last week (after waiting 2 1/2 weeks). I have not been able to make it a whole night with the pillow mask. I am having severe stress and emotional issues with this machine and having to use it. As positive as I try to be, this is really putting a damper on my self esteem. I know that this is best for my health and long term goals, but I am just so frustrated.

So my questions to you are...

How did you deal with the emotional component of getting the CPAP machine?

What advice can you give me on ways to deal with my stress/emotions when I put my mask on nightly?

Was your sleep apnea reversed after loosing weight?

Do you see a difference using the machine?

Three years later, I love my cpap. I do use less pressure with less weight........but I will always have sleep apnea as long as I'm alive. Look to cpaptalk.com for yours and many other issues plus tons of support.........It does take awhile to learn to live with it, much less love it. It doesn't happen overnight.

[Sharilo 6]

It took me a month or so but I really noticed the difference once I got the hang of it. I still kinda cuss at it nightly because I really want a mask that covers my mouth and nose and they can't seem to fit me in one. So, I have to use one that goes just over my nose and wear a chin strap. Ugh. The combo of the two is a pain, but it is really worth it for me. For the first time in many years I am able to sleep through the night. I guess I can say I got lucky because my hubby got his machine at about the same time as I did so we started it together. That helped a little with the emotional side of it. I think that once you get used to the thing and start getting a really good nights sleep you probably won't be under so much stress nightly when it's time to put it on. I wish you much luck!

[LB4Me 35]

I'm having the same problems with mine that you are having. I stay up later and later cause I don't want to put it on. I hate sleeping next to my husband with it, even though he has no problem with it. My puppy is afraid of it. Initially, the pressure was much too high for me to be able to sleep with it for an entire night. I finally convinced my Dr to lower the pressure. I am trying to work up to a full night, and have managed a few 4 to 5 hours with it on. What I do is take a Tylenol PM about an hour before bed. Then when I get into bed I put it on and ramp it up. I start by sitting and watching some TV until I feel like I am in synch with it and can lay down. I'm hoping someday I will be one of those people that has a great nights slep with it and love it, but I do not see that ever happening.

[Corrigan 75]

I have the Puritan Breeze Nasal Pillow mask and It's just about as small as possible. It took me about a year to

get used to it, but now I can't sleep without it (for a while). That's one reason for the band. They're a pain to

adapt to, but once you do, it's not too bad.

[LostInSideMyself 0]

I also had problems with using my cpap machine, no matter how much I tried to use it it caused me severe anxiety, enough to cause me to go into full blown panic attacks, went back to my apnea Dr told him how it affected me, showed him how it affected me and was told not to worry about using it, as it was causing me full blown panic attacks which at one point lasted days, they hooked me up to a heart monitor and my heartbeat and blood pressure was outta control, where it had been normal before. I am on prescribed medications for my anxiety and panic attacks, but what I felt as I tried using it was way beyond control even with medication, even after I stopped using it the panic attacks continued for days, wish I could offer some advice, I just know how I reacted to it so I understand how you feel, and my apnea Dr faxed over a message to my surgeon, letting him know about my problems using it and my surgeon was ok with me not using it and was still approved for my surgery, though I still took it to the hospital the day of my surgery, but they never hooked me up to it. I'm not saying that is what your Dr will do but as for me not wearing it was much more beneficial than wearing it. Hope things get better for you

[shaah 0]

I have been using a CPAP since 2005 and it was the greatest thing I have ever done. I have snored all my life, so as a kid I never wanted to do sleep overs and even as an adult it would be murder sometimes, just starting out dating someone and that first snore that shakes the entire building (lol). At fisrt I was very nervous about the machine, i was like oh great i look like a damn space invader, this is NOT sexy and my girlfriend is going to leave me for sure. But she was very cool and she did crack a few jokes but she was supportive and understood why I needed it. she was just as concerned as I was. My apnea had gotten so bad to where my throat hurt every morning, I was tired all the time, and I literally felt like I was suffocating in my sleep because you stop breathing and then you start again...but sometimes people dont and die. When i first got it I had the mask that covered my nose and mouth and it was great but then I started getting a dark mark across the bridge of my nose and it took months to go away. i then switched to the nasal mask where it just goes into your nostrols and that was perfect, it felt less invasive. eventually i got the new model and i am back with the mask that just goes over the nose and i have a LOT of pressure. It is always a litle uncomfortable when you meet someone and you sleep with them and you have to tell them about the mask of they see it before yu get to tell them about it, but most peopel have been fine with it, so it hasnt been a big issue. im married now and my wife is extremely happy that i have the mask otherwise we couldnt sleep togther. i do get embarassed when my step kids come in the room and im sleep and have it on. i put the covers over my head or ifmy wife is up and im sleeping i will put the covers over my head so i dont feel like she is staring at me. but dont read too much into it. everyone will get used to it and it will just become second nature. hell at this point i cant sleep without it.

[RaleighGal 4]

Thank you to everyone for your feedback to my post. It makes me feel better that I am not alone in my feelings about having to use my CPAP machine, and it also seems that there may be a light at the end of the tunnel. I still continue to struggle at night, but hopefully the struggle will get easier as time goes on.