UPDATED I need to complain to people who will understand

[amjcal 5]

Rachel,

Ever since my first time on this website, I have been following your progress and you have been an inspiration to me. You are doing so well. i am so very proud of you. It is unfortunate you are not having the best of luck... I really think you should go get a second opinion, even if you do have to pay out of pocket for a consult visit it might be worth it, instead of having them treat you so badly. At least you can get a different opinion and if you like the doc you can switch over. it is worth a try. I would have never known there was any problems your way. Thank you for your encouragement in the past and for the inspiration for me to keep chuggin along.

[JinTx 19]

Rachel, i am only 2 wks out so i really cant offer you any advice on the fills, etc bc i havent btdt. I am so sorry that you feel like you've lost your team at your surgeons office. When you go to your 6 mos ck up with your dr i would tell him all of this. Everything. Tell him just as you posted it. Be honest and forward with him. Demand thd amount of Fluid be checked.

On another note, you are such an inspiration to other Rachel. You have done so well and should be proud of what you've accomplished. I always take your posts to heart whenever i see your replies. I know the feeling of still seeing "fat". I've lost 30 pounds and took new pics and couldnt tell one damn difference. I bet yesterday was not the best day for you to have taken pics since you were upset at the PA. I bet if you come back in a cpl of weeks when you arent so frustrated you will see those pictures with a different set of eyes.

Good luck to you! And pleasd keep us updated on the outcome of your 6 mos ck up!

J

Banded 9/22

[Humming Bird 275]

The good thing about it is that you will stay on top of the situation and get it figured out and resolved. I think it's situations like this that make some bandsters give up and stop going back to the surgeon's office. Then we hear back from them when they say it's been a couple years and they have only lost 40 pounds and the band doesn't work.

You will get it resolved. This is just a bump in the road along your journey.

[Mischief 0]

Rachael: First, thank you for being such a positive force on this blog. I've appreciated your words of reassurance and positive attitude.

Next - I sincerely think you need to have a direct conversation with your surgeon, explaining to s/he what your concerns are. It makes me wonder a little bit - why did two obviously beneficial members of his staff choose to leave the practice team? And why has the surgical PA not been replaced by at least an equivalently skilled member? (It is my understanding that a surgical PA receives training above and beyond the "normal" PA level -- and that education and increased skill should not be discarded lightly.) I would not phrase it in a threatening manner - but let the surgeon know that your pre-op exploration of the process included an assessment of the post-op treatment available to you. Just because the surgery is behind you does NOT mean the "task" is compete. Your journal is still mid-stream, and you NEED and have a right to expect the entire post-surgical team to support you along the way.

Congratulations on your weight loss to date -- I've always found your pic to be quite attractive. You've lost a considerable chunk of weight quite quickly -- I think it is reasonable to give your body an opportunity to catch up. I'm betting that as your exercise routine goes along, you're going to find that you are more than pleased with the resulting changes in your body.

Hang in there -- I think you've done a wonderful job thus far, and show all the signs of continuing your weight-loss journey to a beautiful conclusion! Congratulate yourself on your accomplishment. If you don't find satisfaction with your current surgical team, I'm sure you will be able to find a better fit to work with. It's your body, your health, and your $$ -- one GOOD thing about the US health care system (at least somewhat -- limited to your insurance policies exclusions) free to shop for a better fit if needed.

[Jachut 487]

I'd second the notion of finding another team - if it means moving practices - or seeing different poeple within that same practice. Its so frustrating when you feel you're being judged by your medical team - this woman seems to imply that you're not following the rules and looking for ever tighter restriction so that the band can work its magic and you'll lose weight without doing a thing. She's also displaying the assumption that you should just zip your lip and eat less and suck it up, dieting is hard work etc, - they forget that a) we need help to do that and its so darn frustrating to have this tool that isnt working right.

I've had a similar experience and in the end got jack of it and switched doctors (within the same practice). I liked the doc I was seeing as a person but heaven knows what she's doing working with obese people - she's skinny as a rake, obviously always has been and just doesnt get it. My story is that I had to unfill my band for a bowel resection, radiation and chemotherapy about 12 months ago now. She reassured me saying that I coudl refill 3 weeks after the surgery, but then, because I'd lost weight, she wouldnt do it. I believe I could have regained what I needed to slowly and steadily WITH moderate fill in place, but she held me off for six months, it was SUCH hard work not piling on the weight and in a way I'm sort of glad becuase I'm so proud that I went six months completely unfilled and through sheer hard work did not gain any weight - well I regained the weight Iost whilst sick but still weigh under what I did unfilled. Eventually I had to do my block with her, I really threw a tantrum and insisted it was my body, my decision. So we began filling - but she argued every step of the way. For pete's sake, I'd had 3cc in my 4cc band when unfilled, did she really think it was going to achieve anything sticking at 0.5cc? I argued and cajoled my way up to 2.8cc - nowhere near enough for effortless maintenance - before she refused to give me one more fill. So I booked with another doctor. I'm now up to 3.4cc - more than was removed and this woman is awesome - she said she's seen it a hundred times before, unfill and then refill and you'll get an entirely different journey to your first. She said the band can move when unfilled (particularly as I lost significant weight with surgery and chemo) - even in a well healed one like mine (five years at the time it was unfilled), that is different to slipping, the Fluid when put back in just settles differently and the band wont feel quite the same. She had no problem with the fact that I've gone past my previous level, hopefully today's 0.2cc will do it though. I've been checked for leaks every time, my band has been sighted on CT scans and Xrays I had for other reasons and its fine, not slipped, so we'll just see. But at least I know that I've got support - not resistance and judgement - from my doctor.

Its amazing just how differently two doctors will see the same issue - both mine were lovely people but one just obviously should be working in another field - she doesnt have the empathy and understanding about obesity. I'd really see if I could find someone else if I were you. And just keep on truckin. You might find it hard to really lose much without proper restriction, but you're strong and you can maintain and hang in there - I approached it with strict rules - 3 meals NO Snacks, not ever, not for any reason, hungry or not and I ran daily (bleurgh, it made me feel better, but getting motivated to go out for a run in the summer heat the day after chemo infusions isnt that much fun), and I used it as a time to reinforce my lifestyle skills, show myself that I had learned and was different. Positive thinking and you'll be back on track in no time.

[Rachel412 116]

Thank you all for your kind and thoughtful replies. The practice is part of a hospital program, and they started losing people slowly due to layoffs. The last time I saw my nutritionist we talked about how people were being let go and I said how much I'd hate it if she was let go and she said no, she still had her job. Then she ended up quitting Probably a smart move on her part. Jumping from a sinking ship, etc... the practice has a total of about 4 surgeons, my surgeon is split between practices in 2 cities so he's only in the office one day and in surgery one day at my hospital.

The good news is a good a very confusing letter from the practice today. I'm not stupid but I read it 4 times and then asked my husband if he could understand it He really couldn't either. I THINK what it said was they are going to be training programs in other local offices & hospitals to follow their protocols... I guess so maybe I'd be able to switch to a different practice under their general umbrella? I've never read a more confusing letter!

I am faithfully tracking all my food and I just need to keep my fingers crossed that on the 18th they'll listen to me, and at the very least check the level in my band. I hadn't realized that taking all the Fluid out to check it may cause the band to shift- very interesting and good to know.

Thank you all for being so lovely to me, it really cheered me up!!

[highland 168]

Rachel, I know how you feel about losing medical personal you feel so comfortable with. I lost my Internal medicine doctor, my orthepedic surgeon, and my nutritionist all in the same month!

I am so happy that my surgeon does all my follow up visits AND fills! Is that unusual? Today he walked in and said," Stand up and give me a hug! I'm so happy for you!!" I just love him! I really hope you get things sorted out and get back to where you were with trust and support. And yes - you've always been very up beat on this forum. You're allowed to vent!!

[Rachel412 116]

So my update is this: my surgeon is leaving the practice (it's a practice run by the hospital, not by any particular surgeon) and they're not doing any surgeries until November when they'll have a new surgical team. I met with the new dietitian (new to me, she's been with the practice 5 years) who told me that my old dietitian taught me the the wrong way to eat and I need to cut out all nuts. that I need to get at least 100g of Protein a day, and that the only carbs I can have a fruits and veggies.

When I finally got in with the PA I stressed to her that I felt there was a problem and I really needed her to check the Fluid in the band. She still claims she does that every time, but this time after watching her worry out that Fluid, I know for SURE she didn't do it the last 2 times whether she says she did or not. That was a little worrying but the upside is that I now know I don't have a leak.

I got another fill, up to 8.25.

Thanks for listening to me whine everyone

[BayougirlMrsS 3,935]

I have a question..... why do you have to cut out all nuts and carbs except for the veggies?

I eat nuts and some carbs other than veggies...... and 100grams of Protein? Mine says 80..... hummm... something sounds not quite right.

Can you tell me why.... i'm always up for learning.

[Rachel412 116]

Good questions When I asked I was said that nuts have too many carbs (??) and "let's face it, carbs are what make people fat in the first place". As for the 100g, she consulted a chart that was stuck to her bulletin board to give me that number.

[BayougirlMrsS 3,935]

But we all need carbs to give us energy to exercise...so basically she wants you on the sugar buster diet with the band.... Nuts are very high in dietary Fiber, and are one of the best plant sources of Protein. Yes they are high in fat, but it good fat. the kinds that helps lower cholesterol One of my favs is the planters Almonds... cocoa and cinnamon. They are awesome.... My husband loves the chipolata (don't know if i spelled that right) ones.

Just curious.... what did the "old" nutritionist say? Mine never said anything about no nuts or only carbs from fruits and veggies....

Good luck with all that. If i could have stuck with the "sugar buster" "Atkins" diets... i would not have needed the band....lol

[Rachel412 116]

My old nutritionist suggested nuts as a good snack in moderation. She said my meals should be 4 oz. Protein, up to a cup of veggies, then up to 1/2 cup of whole grains if I still had room and felt hungry. Which I thought was pretty reasonable!

I have been trying to follow this "new" diet but not doing that well. In fact I feel like it's causing me to have more cravings and willpower issues than I was having before. I am eating much more fruit, but the sugar in that fruit seems to send me into a carb-craving tizzy!

My "new" nutritionist has been at the practice for 5 years. They told me last week that the "new" nut's patients have historically always done better than my old nutritionist's patients.

[brenda62 47]

Rachel,

You need to find what works best for you and stick with it. People and nutritionist will all offer us their option of what we should be eating. I think as long as you are eating healthy and feel good you are doing what is right for your body. We all loose at different rates and our bodies require different amounts of food. Don't stress over it to much that will slow you down. You know you can do it and so do we!

[BayougirlMrsS 3,935]

i agree with you Brenda... and it must be working. You lost over 100lbs.... wowowowow great job.

Rach, your old nut. and my nut say the same thing.

[sparkplug 106]

I try to be pretty upbeat about the band... I do my best to lend support to others if I can, and to cheerlead for people whenever possible. But lately my band journey has gotten harder and I need to vent- maybe it'll help me feel better.

I've been banded almost 6 months, and have had 5 fills. My 3rd fill, which got me up to 6.75cc, was good and I felt like the band was doing what I wanted it to (keeping me satisfied 4-5 hours, helping me to eat smaller portions). I felt like I was "almost there"-- you know, close to the fabled green zone. I went back 2 weeks later to get another fill, and found out the the surgical P.A. who had done all of my fills left the practice, so the full-time office PA would be doing them. Fine. I watched her when she did it. She put in the new .5cc's but she didn't pull out what was in my band first to measure it, which the other PA always did. I found it odd.

So anyway. Things go well a couple weeks, I notice I'm really not feeling like I'm in a good place like I was before so I call for another fill. I find out I have to book like 3 weeks from when I call (one less PA=a lot fewer open appointments). When I go in in August, I'm busy (my kids are with me and I had to wait 45 minutes before they called me back) but I don't recall her checking the total Fluid this time either. I'd noticed she didn't do it the first time and so it was on my mind this time.

So I'm now up to 7.75cc's and the PA tells me that if I want to have any more fills i have to see the nutritionist first because I have "so much" in my band. I find out that my nutritionist (who I LOVED) also left the practice, and I'll need to see the other woman, who I've seen at support groups and in the office but I've never met. But I walk out thinking, ok, that's fine, this fill will hopefully put me back at a good place and I'll just go in October for my 6 month check up and see where I'm at.

Well... 7.75 didn't feel a damn bit different. In fact I'd say it felt looser. I am now going 2, 2.5 meals after a measured out meal and experiencing hunger. I'm worrying that I have a leak, or that she's missing my port when she fills me or something ,since she hasn't been checking what's in the band. I just feel like something's not adding up here.

I called the office last week to see if I could get in for a fill and this nutritionist meeting i have to have. The woman at the front desk tells me the soonest i could get in is AFTER my 6 month check up (10/18). I get frustrated and tell her that I think I have a leak, the PA hasn't checked how much is in my band, etc. So the receptionist puts me into the PA's voicemail. I explain it all to her.

The PA calls me back and she's on the defensive. She says she ALWAYS checks how much is in the band before she fills. Well... she can say that if she wants but I know she's lying because I watched her the first time and she didn't check it. She then starts going over what my expectations of the band are. Fine, I make sure she knows I'm not expecting a magic cure, I'm just expecting a little help. She says to me "why is it that in July you said you were going 3 hours after a meal before feeling hunger but in August, now that you have MORE Fluid in your band, you're saying it's only 2, 2.5 hours?" Well if I knew the answer to that I probably wouldn't have called, would I?

She says that we can schedule an endoscopy if I really "want it". When I decline she asks me why not and I say my insurance is bad and I don't want to pay for tests if I don't know I really need them. She then says that she wants me to meet with the nutritionist, her, and a surgeon on my 6 month check up and if the doctor and nutritionist say I need it she'll "gladly" do my fill, but until that day I need to track every bite so they can see what I'm eating.

I'm just frustrated. I feel like the band DID start to help me, then it stopped. yes, I have more fluid in it now (maybe?) yet I barely know it's there. I can feel it if I swallow a big mouthful of Water or something I didn't chew well but I've never been stuck, never slimed, none of those things. And I think of those as good things but the truth is I also feel like there's either something wrong with it (leak? maybe the latch opened? I don't know!) or if not, then I need more fills than your average bear to get to the green zone.

beyond all that... I hit 60 pounds lost and asked my husband to take new progress pics for me. And I think they're horrible. I look like a fat person with extra saggy skin. I have been feeling down already and I was so looking forward to a nice set of pics to make me feel accomplished... they just made me feel worse. I may be in a size 18 instead of a 24, but I look just as bad.

OK. Bless you if you read all this. Any BTDT or kind words would be much appreciated.

First of all, you need to find a different PA!!! Their bedside manner is horrendous and not acceptable. Secondly, do not beat yourself up. You know if things are right or not with your body, so go to someone else that will do the fills the way you want and there is nothing that says you cannot go to someone else. After my surgery, we were not able to get funding to go to the same DR in Las Vegas which is in a different state and I have had to search out another Dr in the state of Arizona. The first Dr I called told me to not worry unless I have a problem and here I sit with no problems with the band, NO FILLS and I can actually go for about 4-5 hours before getting hungry. I will again try to find another Dr in our fine state but you need to search until you find someone you are comfortable and confident in to control ;you and your band. Good luck and do not give up!!