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Completely panicing need suggestions to get thru this!



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So today I went to see my surgeon like I'm suppose to 1 week prior to surgery. As I sat there waitng 60 minutes in the waiting room I start see all these patients that I hate to say it are very overweight, and look miserable granted I have no idea if they are pre op or post op or just clearly there for a consult. This leads into the what the hell am I doing talk in my head. I start worring about surgery, I have three small children what if something happens to me, I don't want to leave 3 children motherless then I start worrying that maybe I go thru the surgery and what if I don't lose weight, what if all I do is vomit all the time. All this and then they call me back to see my surgeon and he walks in all smiles saying everything is gonna be great and I'm gonna do great. I think he could tell I had the oh **** I'm gonna run look on my face. After talking to him I felt better, but know I'm starting to panic again. I really am just plain ole scared. I've never had any type of surgery at all. I've been told what to expect but I'm just freaked out due to the unknown. How did everyone deal with this if at all. Any suggestions??

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We All worry about this kinda stuff......... you are normal.

There is a really good thread on the pre-lap board that really addresses many of your questions (it might be burried a little bit, but look for it, it has about 2000 reads last time I checked. and it is written by a successful bandee to people with just your questions.) LET ME KNOW IF YOU CANNOT FIND IT - it is a wonderful post.

As for everything else, take it one day at a time, one question at a time. I called the doctors office to talk to them CONSTANTLY about my fears - they had one particular person who dealt with calls like this and gave advice. And later, after surgery, she was the one who told me that either everything was normal (many times) or that I needed to talk to the PA about this situation (only once, and he took me off a med that was too strong for my stomach).

Before surgery: I FINALLY settled down and relaxed when I was patiently told that it was a 45 minute out-patient surgery. i had somehow built the surgery up in my mind to something bigger than it was.

After surgery: I have had my bumps: an overfill and intolerance to a med (raging diarreah - ew); And I still could have a problem - but seriously I am off my Blood Pressure meds (122/80 today) and no cholesteral meds anymore ......and I am not even half way an my weight loss journey. It has been wonderful--for me. I now longer agonize on how and what I am going to eat: the answer is anything I want that I can tolerate in a small portion.

BUT: you must decide what is right for you: ask your questions and demand answers: I was truly pissed when I was told i would have to give up diet coke and wanted (DEMANDED) to know WHY- which I found out- and now I don't even want it. Also, I was pissed when I found out that you have to go back on liquids for a few days after a fill.......at my first fill. (I thought someone shoulda told me earlier )

Good luck, Terri

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The threat that I mentioned is on the pre-lap board and is called: Bandster basics & a day in the life (168 lbs down and 2 years out)

It 's last post was on 9/15, but since you have the title, use the search up in the right hand corner.

Also, if you leave a comment, you will bring the threat up to current so others can enjoy this post too.

Once again, it is REALLY worth finding and reading.

Terri

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Great advice from StratCat.

And remember, although there is a risk with every surgery, there is a much greater risk that you won't be there for your children if you are obese. And even if you are there physically, you won't be able to do as much with them. I speak from experience and wish I had done this when my children were much, much younger.

Good luck

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Honestly, if you WERENT feeling like this... you'd be crazy. We all go through this. It's a scary thing.

If you were vomiting all the time, you can easily get an unfill! The surgery will go fine & you'll come out of there thinking "glad that's over" ...good luck!

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I can relate to this. It was about 4 days before starting pre-op diet. I awoke around 4am and had this feeling of pure anxiety. My chest wad tight & I was freaking out. I went to work & almost came home because I was having a hard time holding myself together. I know I'm a worrier, but this kind of thing has never happened to me before. I stuck it out at work & when I came home for lunch, my husband was able to put it in perspective for me & really calm me down. I wad saying that my whole life was going to change. His response was, no not your whole life. You're still going to be the same person, you're still going to get up every morning and kiss your kids goodbye, you're still going to going to go to work, etc. He really does have a way of calming me down. Now I'm only 2 days post-op and I don't have any wonderful stories yet, but nor do I have Amy real horror stories either. I know it will be worth it some day and that's what is getting me through,

Good luck to you. I hope you can find peace with your decision.

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Where I went they couldn't do surgery on you if you were over 500Lbs.....

That's what the equipment held.

I seen Men in there at 550-600Lbs. with No Legs! do to Sugar !

They were in there wheelchairs, and there daily or every other day just to get weighed, so they could come down to 500Lbs to have surgery.

Now that's what you call something to get Freaked Out over.

My Dear it's Nerves, and Reality all rolled into one thing. What If? and I'm scared. NATURALLY ! WHO ISN'T ?

It's a perfectly normal feeling.

What if you don't do something about your weight, and you die from it ? Then they will be Motherless.

I know you don't want that at all, so do what's best for you...

But it was a rude awakening for me to, It scared the Crap out of me. But yet I knew without it I would die. If I would not have had the surgery, Well,,,, I wouldn't be here today. I was drowning in my own bodily fluids. Didn't have much time left. He saved my Life.... I owe him that.

You don't want to end up like that either. So you do what's best ! But it is a true reality check.

Good Luck, and let me know what your going to do, Shirley.

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I really am just plain ole scared. I've never had any type of surgery at all. I've been told what to expect but I'm just freaked out due to the unknown. How did everyone deal with this if at all. Any suggestions??

As weird as it sounds I was a healthy fat person. No high BP, no diabetes, no high cholesteral... just 200 lbs too many for a healthy weight for my height. But at 50 years old I knew those healthy days were numbered.

Actually for the first time my husband and I had a frank conversation about my weight when I was whinning about being scared during the first week of my preop diet.... and he was the one to calm me down by saying he didnt care if I lost weight or not. He loved me. However he was concerned for my health and was worried I would die with in 10 yrs if I didnt get the weight off and keep it off. My daughter was pregant at the time and I was worried sick something would happen to me during surgery and she wouldnt have a mom around and her baby wouldnt have a Grandma but his words seemed to put it all in perspective for me.

Fast forward 10 months, I have a healthy 3 month old granddaughter and my husband has a healthier 50 year old wife who is 126 lbs lighter than that dark November day last year!

I had my gall bladder out 20 years ago...that was my surgical experience which I obviously survived so I dealt with my fears by facing it head on. I did my research, visited 3 surgeons, followed all the rules of the preop diet including giving up carbonation (that is HUGE) and was mentally ready to make this life change. I decided I wouldnt have any problems because I trusted my Dr and promised to follow his advice.

You will be fine and your children will be so lucky to have you around for a long long time.

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Thank you all for all your get advice. I clearly know that I'm doing something that I really want to do because I don't want to be unhappy anyone. I pray everything will be just fine and I'm sure I will freak a little more as time grows closer but I have gotten this far and it would be very silly to just give up now. Giving up is why I'm here today, I gave up on myself and now I'm fighting to get me back !

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You go future BandSister ! ;)

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