My thoughts tonight

babsintx3 · February 4, 2006

Hi Penni,

Hugs from TX. Yes, I still have a band and NO I couldnt possibly know how you feel being bandless but I do understand fear.

FEAR has been controlling me since I had an accidental complete unfill following plastic surgery. I have been gaining weight and I wont weigh myself. (DENIAL)

FEAR is a terrible way to live. Fear of gaining, fear of not having a band, fear of an eroded band, fear of gaining all of the weight I lost. Gosh, all this fear sucks the wind out of my sails sometimes. It is part of what controls all of us obese and formerly obese on a day to day basis. It is a horrible way to live and folks that have been obese, ostracized and mentally abused by others are their own worst enemies. Allof us DO remember what it is like to have not have a band, the love for food and all the other demons that have been grabbing all of us by the ankles on a day to day basis. I do feel your pain and I hope that you know that everyone here is thinking of you and wishing the best for you.

Work your way through the loss. Not everyone can jump back after such a terrible experience. Take as long as you need and dont compare yourself to others as we say frequently here on this board. Allow yourself time to grieve the loss and then move on when you are ready. Ya got friends here girlfriend so say whatever you need to say to work your way through this.

Hugs,

Babs in TX

Dianechef · February 7, 2006

First of all, it's hard enough to be FAT. Then to have WLS & have it fail, is even worse!! Penni, I can't even imagine your personal struggle along with all the rest of you who have lost your bands!! It is unsensitive for a doctor to make any comment about someone to get over it. I am very happy to hear that he apologized.

I have always loved reading your posts & love the support you give to the rest of us.

YOU CAN DO IT PENNI!!!!!

Penni60 · February 7, 2006

I am thankful that Dr. Pleatman apologized.

I am heading home tomorrow from the Tucson Bead Show. I am tired, bloated, and know for a fact that I gained at least 10 lbs. I just simply ate the WRONG foods while gone.

The funny thing is as I was eating the wrong foods I knew I shouldn't have been eating it but I could NOT stop myself. Bizarre!!

I am cutting my trip short a few days so I can get back on track with the Nutrisystem. I have learned a valuable lesson on this trip. I cannot deviate even the slightest from my plan or I will end up back at the beginning. This is simply a way of life for us all. Banded or unbanded we have to watch what we put into our bodies. Preservatives, salt, sugar, carbs, fats, etc are NOT good for us.

I have NOT been drinking my Water and being in the desert that is NOT a good thing. I am very dehydrated and my skin is pissed at me. Very dry and flaky. Too much sodas and not enough water makes Penni an irritable person.

It seems that I am forever quoting Miss Scarlett O'Hara, "Tomorrow is another day."

SIGH!! LOL!!!

Hugs to all and to all a good night.