The first downer in my journey

[HopefulVA 2]

Ohhh I knew the day would come, when one of the very few friends of mine would say something about me getting lap band surgery. This morning I got a private message on Facebook, asking me if I wanted to join her in a new diet called the Raw Diet. So I'm thinking 'Ok, let me take a look at the link she sent'. Yea, the video was all about how this guy lost a lot of weight on the Raw diet because he considered gastric surgery, did all the insurance required testing, but then had an epiphany and decided not to get it ('something just told me not to do it').

This friend is like a size 6 at the most, and for some reason I can't shake the feeling that she doesn't want me to get the surgery. THAT'S why I hardly told anyone. The people I did tell I thought would support me 100%. The Raw Diet sounds interesting, but I don't have the money to buy only fruits, veggies, and nuts that are ALL organic. Not with the volume of food that I can consume at this point. UGH! People just don't get it. You can explain to them your condition, but they just don't get it in the end. (Just like when I tried to explain to a girl that weighs about 110lbs what binging is and she just says to me "oh I know what you mean'. Really?! You REALLY know what I am going through? That voice that tells you that you can eat it? The psychological warfare that happens while you have a binge attack?)

Anyway, first rant post. I just had to get it off my chest. I feel better now.

[genesishanna 2]

I decided to tell only a few individuals about my decision to have the lap band surgery. I am very happy that I did because it limited the negative feedback that I would receive from others. Weight loss is a personal journey, and regardless of the road you choose to take with it, you will find yourself alone. You have to make the choices that are best for you and be secure in it.

My GYN was the the first to suggest the surgery for me, because she felt that my weight was causing health issues, that would eventually require a hysterectomy. I went to a doctor she referred me to an I felt uncomfortable there. They told me all that I needed to do and they will do the surgery in September (when the six months my insurance company required would be over). The visit was impersonal, and they never followed up with me once. They called me in September to see if I did anything and that was it.

One of my girlfriends, who didnt have a weight problem, but wanted to lose weight fast kept trying to convince me to do the surgery, but i was turned off by the amount of weight that she lost. The point that I am trying to make is that everyone have their own reasons why the want you to do the surgery, or why they wouldn't.

One day, I received a newsletter from the hospital where I gave birth to my baby. They had an article about their "Comprehensive Obesity Management Program" and it immediately peaked my interest. I just knew in my heart that it was for me. I went into one of there seminars, made my first appointment, and kept up with the program. Today I am 3 days post-op and am thankful.

Towards my surgery date I have had people tell me that I should try this or that instead of surgery. There comments would go in one ear and right out the other because I was certain about what I needed to do for my personal weight loss journey. My aunt's comment was the most interesting when she told me that she lost 35 pounds on some type of pills. The crazy thing is that the pills were for back pains and not weight loss. Then she said that she would give me the number for the doctor and all I have to do is say that I have chronic back pains and get my own prescription. It was at that point that I realized that my aunt really had a personal problem that she was trying to project onto me. I told her that I was getting the surgery and she told me that she never told anybody before, but she had the lap band surgery and she had not loss weight. I guess this was her last attempt at convincing me not to get it done.

I decided not to discuss this with her any further. I concluded that either she is lying, or she did the procedure as a quick easy way to loss the weight and saw that it would not work without any work or effort on her part. Either way, this was my choice, my decision, and I am thankful for it. It has to work, so I am going to do all that I can and make sure of that. My advice to you is to find your purpose, get motivated, and stay focused- that way no one can take you off your journey. Be Blessed - Nicole

[Dave_NW 92]

I hear you. In this case, see if you can find out if your FB friend invited everyone else she knows, too. I'll wager she sent the invite to everyone on her FB friends list - like the automatic emails that go out when you change your Internet provider. If she only sent it to you, it's because you're the fat friend she KNOWS would love to lose weight. Consider the source, and ignore it. It may not be as uncaring as you think, just clumsy of her.

Don't reply to her invite. If she comes back and pesters you directly, just tell her, "Thanks for thinking of me, but I'm going to follow my own plan and see how it works for me." In a few months she'll be on to another specialized diet, while you'll be well on your way to your band journey's weight loss. People like that get tired of routine things, and she'll move on.

I wouldn't take it too personally. You have better things to focus on. Good luck with your own journey!

Dave

[Mscaramel38 5]

Hey I will have my lap band done on the 23rd of this month. I started this journey last year August with my first visit and all of the Dr. appointments to be cleared for the surgery.

I am an open type of person and so I have told the world. The only opinion that counts besides my own is my mother's opinion. Sad to say she does not support my decision at all. Last year when I introduced the idea to her she stop talking to me for a couple of weeks. Now that I am close to having the surgery she has told me that I have no self control, low self esteem and self image issues.

I have always wanted and desired my mothers approval in everything I have done in life, however I notice that it happens few and far in between many of my life choices. I say all that to say....... You are the only one living your life!!! No one knows how you feel and the stress that your body is under from being overweight. No one knows how it feels to eat and eat and still feel as though you can eat more and never be FULL. The word FULL is a joke to many people with eating and weight issues.

What ever decision you make.... Make it for you and only. Make the decision that you can live with and be happy with. Even if and when things go wrong........ You should Never regret your decision. Just my opinion on the situation.

[cheryl2586 3,053]

First of all the raw diet does not sound healthy to me because even vegans eat Protein. Who could live off of vegetables and fruit and a few nuts that is insane and yes the 90lb people should eat that crap. Regardless of having the surgery we love food because if we didnt we wouldnt be over weight and I say over weight because I hate that doctors write obese in your chart and think you will never see it. But anyhoo if I wanted to be a rabbit I would eat that crap however I choose to love having a variety in my diet. That diet would last about 1 day because who in their right mind would do that to themselves. Just forget what people say. Others that knew I was having the surgery would say its going to be so hard for you. Well guess what it was already hard for me you idiots and it cant get much worse. So do what your heart feels and do me a favor and email her back and tell her if God had wanted you to be a rabbit he would have given you a fluffy tail.

[sworiginal 0]

I am so sorry about your mother and her disapproval. I am sort of in the same place. My mother is not supportive of my decision but then she never has been very supportive of any of my decisions. I learned a long time ago that I would never have her approval. Hopefully you will get to that place and stop alowing her to hurt you. I wish you good luck and great weight loss and a healthy life after your surgery. I hope the same for me.

Hey I will have my lap band done on the 23rd of this month. I started this journey last year August with my first visit and all of the Dr. appointments to be cleared for the surgery.

I am an open type of person and so I have told the world. The only opinion that counts besides my own is my mother's opinion. Sad to say she does not support my decision at all. Last year when I introduced the idea to her she stop talking to me for a couple of weeks. Now that I am close to having the surgery she has told me that I have no self control, low self esteem and self image issues.

I have always wanted and desired my mothers approval in everything I have done in life, however I notice that it happens few and far in between many of my life choices. I say all that to say....... You are the only one living your life!!! No one knows how you feel and the stress that your body is under from being overweight. No one knows how it feels to eat and eat and still feel as though you can eat more and never be FULL. The word FULL is a joke to many people with eating and weight issues.

What ever decision you make.... Make it for you and only. Make the decision that you can live with and be happy with. Even if and when things go wrong........ You should Never regret your decision. Just my opinion on the situation.

[HopefulVA 2]

Thanks for the replies you guys.

I have cooled off a little today and I told her that I wasn't interested in the diet. I really can't afford to do all organic stuff right now. I am focusing on my surgeons appointment tomorrow, and moving forward with the process. I agree with Dave that she was probably just very very clumsy in her response and will keep everything quiet from her for now.

Thankfully the people that matter most, like my immediate family, are all behind me. So, as long as they are nobody else really matters. I'll try to find my inner Zen and watch her do that diet for about two weeks, because that's as long as she will last on it...if that.

[honk 780]

I think many people think if you just try/think hard enough you can stop being fat. Alcoholics are told they can never drink again. food Addicts are told eat 3 meals a day for the rest of your life. Your friend would never tell an alcoholic it's only one drink! Do what you need to do to be healthy.