Have you lost your "Wild Thang" urges?

[Jachut 487]

It can be a stage of life thing too Kel, you've got a bunch of kids just like I have. Its not like I dont love my hubby and its not like I dont enjoy sex a lot when we actually do it but if you give me the option between sleep and sex, I'll always take the sleep at the moment. I'm just so busy I fall down dead at the end of the day.

It might be worth bringing up with your GP, as it could also be hormonal.

[Kathy473 1]

I saw your post Paul...bad boy...how's the arm?!! But where are all the other men? I guess you are the brave one!! :hail: :Banane23:

[paula 4]

hmmmmm, Kelly...

Im wondering if "the Pill" would help this. With all those hormones and crap they have in there...????

Im struggling myself, so dont feel you are alone!

[La_madam 20]

If anything mine has gotten better..I feel sexy for the first time in years..I now wear thongs and cute little matching bras and panties..my husband is lovin' it!

[kimalicious 5]

Here is my 2 cents. I am on the pill, but no matter how pig I got I was always a big time horn dog, unfortunately it started from a very young age. I have been pondering why, when I am losing weight that my libido would drop. Well, for me I know when I started this weight loss is when I started realizing how big I had gotten and how much more weight I have to lose. Before I started looking at myself regularly and weighing myself and paying close attention to my weight I never thought twice about it, therefore It never affected my libido. Now that I know how big I am and now that I see the belly hanging worse than ever and the boobs and the extra skin every where and see all of the weight I still have to lose I don't feel sexy at all. I can't afford new clothes with every size I drop So my clothes are all too big right now, or just don't fit right anymore. I feel worse about my body image now than before the band and this has affected my own libido. I know my husband loves me and I know he would like more of what I got, but I also work full time plus and go to college part time. Put that along with driving 110 miles a day to and from all of these places and getting my workout in and housework and homework, I am just so not in the mood.

The weirdest part of all of this is that I dream about it all the time!!! All the time!! But when I wake up that feeling is gone. I hope this doesn't last and I hope that the more weight I lose the better I will feel about myself.'

Let me know Kellie if you hear any good ideas...it is past dressing sexy at this point for me.

[DevilMayKare 1]

it's no fun alone... well it can be, but your arm will get sore.

Okay... am I the only one going, "his ARM?"

I mean I could see your hand getting sore or your wrist--but your WHOLE ARM???

So I guess now we know where the Big Paul moniker comes from.

ROTFLOL...

But now... :focus: I'm with Vines on this one. I think you should have your hormones checked. You might have to be firm and demand it if you have an HMO but they can really make a difference. I didn't find Estrogen made me randy--but when I started a low dose of testosterone--WATCHOUT!

Unfortunately I haven't had sex for ages but not only did that stuff make me horney as all getout it made me start cussing at the other drivers on the road!! Seriously, I have never been an aggresive driver, but I switched to every other day when I found myself wanting to strangle ever other person in the fwy traffic!

[nanahanna 1]

Yeah, about 13 years ago I talked to my gyno about low libido. He put me on testosterone...I quit taking it when I started growing a beard! My husband didn't mind though, LOL.

[Jachut 487]

Well you dont look at the mantlepiece when your stoking the fire anyway!

I'm sure my husband would be happy for me to have a beard or even two heads if I was up for it 10 times a day.

[Kelliebelly 13]

Hey everyone,

I just got back from the Drs and told her about it and suggested they check my hormones. She said that it wouldnt be an accurate reading as I am on the pill. The only thing she could think of is that because I am on the pill and I was bigger it didnt effect me as much but no that I have lost weight the stronger pill is giving me more side effects. At her suggestion I will discontinue the pill for a month or 2 and see how it goes. I am not having sex anyway so I cant get preggers. She has given me a form to get some things checked though, I am not sure what they are so Ill just type them and maybe someone will know- FBE, E/LFTs, ESR, TSH, Glucose(fasting) Iron studies, B12 Folate. So is this means anything to anyone let me know please . I was kind of hoping to find out some exact answers and come away with something that will make it all better. I will give this pill thing a try and get these tests done and see how they go.

She also asked me how does it feel when I think about sex, I told her it makes me sick. She said so you get physically sick thinking about it. I said no but close...:xena_banana: She suggested I talk to Paul and forbid sex for 1 month we are allowed to do everything else but have sex - she suggested we masturbate each other...sorry if that is TMI...I am sitting her thinking if I could be bothered masturbating him or me Id just have sex. Oh well back to the drawing board. Hopefully we will work something out. Thanks for all the suggestions...and I really like the name Duty f*&k vines...good one :Banane03:

[Parvathi 2]

Hey Kel - I read in the other thread that you had looked at herbal stimulants and it made me remember a party I went to two years ago. Was talking to this girl and somehow the subject of sex came up. She was saying that she had completely lost her sex drive for like 6 months, then started taking Horny Goat Weed. She absolutely swears by the stuff. Its some chinese herbal formula and there's one for women too, evidentally. Might be worth a shot? I'm gonna pick some up this week, if the doctor says its okay...

Good luck with it though!

[CandySmooch 0]

WARNING - I USE THE F WORD A LOT IN THIS POST SO DON'T READ IF YOU GET OFFENDED EASILY

I also really enjoyed Vines colorful post and the fact that she didn't sugar coat it and came right and said DUTY FUCKS - never heard it before but it sure fits the bill.

I know all of these suggestions on here are great, but I think they wouldn't be helpful in your situation. I think its a more serious underlying problem - would you mind telling us how you feel about Paul? Why do you almost feel physically sick at the thought of sex with him? I know my heart and my chachee are linked hand in hand and if one of them is not in sync then there ain't no enjoying anything. Whether I'm horny or not if I'm upset or hurt or whatever at Jon then I just can't get past that enough to enjoy sex with him but will still and have on occasion given him the token duty fuck instead of talking with him about the problem so he could never say I didn't fulfill my wifely duties even though he is not the type of man to even ask for a duty fuck and he was unaware that it actually was a duty fuck. If he knew I was just giving a duty fuck then I'm sure he would never want it that way - he'd rather wait till I was in the mood which makes me love him more.

But I have a friend who is GORGEOUS and skinny and she just never has really enjoyed sex all that much. Her ex-boyfriend was constantly berating her for not giving it up more than once a week and she only gave him the once a week because he wouldn't leave her alone. She even said she'd roll to her side and say just do it and get it over with and the bastard actually would!

I can't imagine being with a man who would rather I just give it up without any heart in it than wait until we were both on the same page. I would try to look into your feelings behind sex w/ Paul. Do you ever look deep within yourself and get upset about how he'd rather have the duty sex with you than no sex at all? Just trying to help explore some other possible reasons here.

P.S. If thats not the case, I did want to highly recommend the X-Scream from Delarla - I know that when my heart is in it but my chachee isn't - a little dab of it will make my chachee wake right up!

[Kelliebelly 13]

Thanks for the thoughts candy. I have explored my feelings and thoughts on Paul. I love him so much, he has been through my side through all this. My past 2 relationships were extremely abusive emotional and physically. I never thought Id have a normal relationship that didnt involve violence. He turned my life around for the better, I actually when I htink about owe him everything....thats why I feel so bad about how I feel. Its not him that makes me pysically ill, its the thought of sex, not just with him..sex in general. I spose this is getting right off and I am babbling on, but I know in myself it is not Paul, its me. I just got to work out how to fix it.

Thanks for the suggestions

Hugs all

[Kelliebelly 13]

Maybe Ill pick up some of that horny goat weed Jess was talking about, couldnt hurt right ? Might get a catalogue from Delarla too...see if I really am missing out on something hehe

[CandySmooch 0]

Well with your situation - again I highly recommend the X-Scream - just a little dab will do and it heightens any touch or feelings to the chachee and makes it all warm and tingly! Try the goat weed too! Try all of these suggestions in one night - makeup, hair, music, candles, lingerie, goat week, X-Scream - wow what a night that would be!

Foreplay starts way before the bedroom - Jon gave me a tender kiss before work tonight and as I was leaving I threw a sexy glance over my shoulder on the way out the door and he gave me this cute little wink back. I think that's the first time he's ever winked at me and we've been together 3 years. It made me want to call in sick to work in the worst way, LOL.