Do you ever feel like a fraud?!

[oldiebutgoodie2 11]

Usually, I feel good when people compliment me on my weight loss, how good I'm looking, etc. But sometimes, like lately when I haven't lost anything for a few days, or God forbid even gained a pound, I feel like a fraud-- it actually makes me feel guilty and discouraged! I think these wonderful people are eventually going to be disappointed cause I just may stop losing forever!!

Has anyone else felt this way and found a way of getting over it, other than feeling bad about yourself til you eventually lose again?

[jen36 1]

I dont feel exactly like that but i feel really uncomfortable when people compliment me on my weight loss like I dont deserve it bc I took the easy way out!!!

[tengles 0]

For us bandsters this definantly not easy. We will always have to watch what we eat & exercise. The battle against fat will be forever. Thinking of this I enjoy compliments for the work I am doing. I know it can be hard for some but we are beautiful women taking charge of our futures.

[odamay 4]

I have to say, I am a slow looser very slow.I did not thought i was gonna stop loosing myself..Well its been 2 1/2 years and I am still loosing slow sometimes I dont have a loss. Just stick with it, dont give up and dont worry what other people think. remember you did this for yourself.Good luck on your journey.

Usually, I feel good when people compliment me on my weight loss, how good I'm looking, etc. But sometimes, like lately when I haven't lost anything for a few days, or God forbid even gained a pound, I feel like a fraud-- it actually makes me feel guilty and discouraged! I think these wonderful people are eventually going to be disappointed cause I just may stop losing forever!!

Has anyone else felt this way and found a way of getting over it, other than feeling bad about yourself til you eventually lose again?

[odamay 4]

Its not the easy way out, its a tool we still have to work hard to drop weight.We still diet and still excercise, and still struggle.

I dont feel exactly like that but i feel really uncomfortable when people compliment me on my weight loss like I dont deserve it bc I took the easy way out!!!

[nurse535 30]

I did not decide to have this surgery to please others, so the only person I'm worried about disappointing is myself! I love seeing the number on the scale going down, but more than anything I want to have more energy and better overall health.

Honestly there are probably some people who WANT us to fail, so you'd be pleasing those people and not disappointing them

[CheckYes 46]

I think for me, I don't feel like a fraud, but I do not like the fuss people make over my weight loss. I think it is because I didn't realized just how embarrassed I was before to be carrying all that extra weight. I still have about 40 pounds to go so I am not totally there yet but it's almost like I just want to get there and have everyone only remember the new healthy me.

Also, you have to know that one pound is not going to make a difference in the way you look. You look good whether you are at your lowest weight or a few pounds from it. Don't feel like a fraud. You worked hard for it. Whether it is 37 pounds or 38 is really immaterial. Good for you!

[Woodslass 22]

That's like asking if I feel like a fraud because I color my hair, or wear makeup. HELL NO I don't feel like a fraud. I worked for every pound I've lost, and I want people to notice and compliment me, and tell me how good I look. It keeps me going!

[oldiebutgoodie2 11]

I dont feel exactly like that but i feel really uncomfortable when people compliment me on my weight loss like I dont deserve it bc I took the easy way out!!!

Uncomfortable is yet another perfect word to describe that feeling I sometimes get! But it's because I feel guilty for not losing---so why are they still complimenting me?! As you and I both know, the band is not an easy way out! Like someone else on here said, a lot of that negativity from others is because they sort of hope you fail, cause they can't lose weight, they think you will move out of their lives once you are skinny, etc etc!

I'm feeling better already knowing there are others who feel that same way as me, even people who are almost at goal! Thank you thank you! And keep up the good work!

[oldiebutgoodie2 11]

That's like asking if I feel like a fraud because I color my hair, or wear makeup. HELL NO I don't feel like a fraud. I worked for every pound I've lost, and I want people to notice and compliment me, and tell me how good I look. It keeps me going!

I LOVE YOUR ATTITUDE!!! Thank you!! And congrats on your great progress so far!

[oldiebutgoodie2 11]

I think for me, I don't feel like a fraud, but I do not like the fuss people make over my weight loss. I think it is because I didn't realized just how embarrassed I was before to be carrying all that extra weight. I still have about 40 pounds to go so I am not totally there yet but it's almost like I just want to get there and have everyone only remember the new healthy me.

Also, you have to know that one pound is not going to make a difference in the way you look. You look good whether you are at your lowest weight or a few pounds from it. Don't feel like a fraud. You worked hard for it. Whether it is 37 pounds or 38 is really immaterial. Good for you!

Excellent point!-- embarrassment is part of it, because by verbalizing how good I look now is, I guess, also pointing out how bad I looked before! Well, better that than visa versa! Thanks for the encouraging words. As I have said before, this web site and all you wonderful people are my support group, and have been soooo helpful in this journey. Congrats to you on your amazing success so far. You are an inspiration!

[oldiebutgoodie2 11]

I have to say, I am a slow looser very slow.I did not thought i was gonna stop loosing myself..Well its been 2 1/2 years and I am still loosing slow sometimes I dont have a loss. Just stick with it, dont give up and dont worry what other people think. remember you did this for yourself.Good luck on your journey.

Thank you very much. It is encouraging to see someone who has been at this for 2 1/2 years, and that it is still working. I know it is a lifetime thing (I have given away all my bigger clothes for the first time ever!), but sometimes it is still hard to believe it is really true after all the failed DIETS in the past. Thanks! And continued good luck to you in your journey.

[oldiebutgoodie2 11]

For us bandsters this definantly not easy. We will always have to watch what we eat & exercise. The battle against fat will be forever. Thinking of this I enjoy compliments for the work I am doing. I know it can be hard for some but we are beautiful women taking charge of our futures.

So true! Thanks!

[Dave_NW 92]

When people compliment me on my appearance these days, it's compared to how I used to look. After more than a hundred pound weight loss, I know I look much better than I did. So I sincerely thank them for the compliment, because I know they mean it. If I know them well enough to get personal, I may add that it's been a hard road, but I'm working my ass off - literally! Then we have a chuckle over it, and I thank them again for their kind words, and for noticing the change. (How they COULDN'T notice is beyond me. I've lost a third of my former body weight.)

I know a few pounds up or down aren't going to mean anything to them, compared to the overall weight loss. So there is no sense wasting energy on feeling like a fraud, or even being uncomfortable if I'm up a few pounds. Give me a few days and I'll be back down again. It's all relative, and the general weight direction is downward.

Dave

[Kate rules 43]

Heck no! Anyone who has gone through being banded knows this is not the easy way out. I've had to learn more about myself and my body (and food!) over the past two months than I did in the 30 years before that. So, no, I'm not a fraud, neither are you.

NOW, if you are preachy and judgmental of overweight people after the banding, then you're a fakey hater and should be ashamed. I'm grateful I had the resources to have this procedure, but a lot of people don't have the resources to do this.