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NSV and ramblings



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I went to the bar to a motorcycle club party for an hour yesterday. It was the first time in over 2 years that I have been out in the town I live in. I just got too self conscious about being fat and then too much out of touch to go out.

I don't see myself going out alot or partying until closing but a little socializing once in awhile will work.

It never bothered me to go out alone because I rode motorcycle for the last 25 years. There wasn't any other women to go with back then. I also worked out of town alot and got used to going places by myself. Yet, all of the sudden I didn't want to be out and seen because of my size.

The strange part is it will probably be one of the last time I see many of these people.

I think the job in Malawi Africa may come through in the next few weeks. This is the first time that I have been able to admit this and I don't think I could do it verbally. Moving all alone to a primitive country to work on fiscal accountability and enforcement will be challenging. I am out looking for an on/off road bike to take with and plan to have something else shipped later if it is feasible to ride the roads. I wouldn't have gone at my old weight. My health was declining and not having medical facilities in the country would have been difficult.

Even though my weight has stalled for the past 3 months, I think I'm over the mental issues that caused it and I'm going to give it all I've got from now on. When I leave, I want to have to buy a new wardrobe. Getting one there is going to be difficult.

Thanks LBT for being here for support, giving me a place to ramble, and some place to acknowledge that I'm glad I went out yesterday. NSVs rock. Celeste

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Wow, congrats on everything! You are my hero, packing up and moving to a strange place. I thought moving to ID was a foreign country, but wow, you really are moving to a foreign one!

Congrats on the bar thing, that mental stuff can be harder than the physical.

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Guest ASPHALT ANGEL

Celeste, glad to hear you are getting out more. Send me an email or call me and tell me about your trip to Mexico and all the other good stuff happening to you.

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That's such a huge NSV. I still find it difficult to go out in public, particularly on my own. Its something I'm working on...

I'm proud of you!

Good luck with your upcoming move, as well.

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