Is there anyway to not tell your roommate?

[anewchapter 0]

Hello All,

Wow, I seem to have a lot of questions today.....

I know that telling people about my lapband is my decision. Part of me wants to tell the world and the other part doesn't want anyone to know. I read the "food police" discussion and it has got me thinking.

I have told my parents and a couple of my closest friends aobut my decision. However the problem is that I rent my extra bedroom to a girl that, honesty, I don't want her to know. She never really had any issues with food or her weight till she was 25-30 (we are now both 33). In the last year she has lost 50 lbs and is basically at her goal. She is really not a close friend of mine, it just works out well for us both to be roommates. I really don't want to tell her and we don't eat very many meals together, but I just don't see it being possible not to tell her because we live together.

Any thoughts?? Could it be possible to have this surgery and not tell someone you live with??

[THEgeorgiaPEACH 3]

The only people I've told are my mom, sister & grandparents. I live with my mom, and my aunt lives with us as well. My aunt and I do NOT get along, so I didn't want to tell her-because I knew she would never keep her mouth shut. So we just told her I had to get my gall bladder removed. Same scarring & such... same recovery process, it's laproscopic, etc. No one really asked any questions. Its a lie - which sucks... but it keeps people out of your business. Just thought I'd share.

Hello All,

Wow, I seem to have a lot of questions today.....

I know that telling people about my lapband is my decision. Part of me wants to tell the world and the other part doesn't want anyone to know. I read the "food police" discussion and it has got me thinking.

I have told my parents and a couple of my closest friends aobut my decision. However the problem is that I rent my extra bedroom to a girl that, honesty, I don't want her to know. She never really had any issues with food or her weight till she was 25-30 (we are now both 33). In the last year she has lost 50 lbs and is basically at her goal. She is really not a close friend of mine, it just works out well for us both to be roommates. I really don't want to tell her and we don't eat very many meals together, but I just don't see it being possible not to tell her because we live together.

Any thoughts?? Could it be possible to have this surgery and not tell someone you live with??

[Coco's Mum 1]

Sure, I think it's possible ... unless you have not a good recovery. But, on the whole, you'll be eating smaller meals (which people do), exercising more (which people do) ... even Protein Shakes (people drink those all of the time as well).

[nurse535 30]

I don't see any reason to tell her. I'd recommend saying it's a hernia repair rather than gallbladder removal, however, because if you do end up having to have your gallbladder out she'll know something's up LOL. There's probably not any way around telling her you are having surgery, but if you don't feel comfortable telling her why, then don't. If she questions your smaller meals or Protein Shakes, just say the surgery has made you want to work on improving your health, which is totally true

[NJGirl32 43]

I told my Hubby but did not tell my daughters (ages 24 and 19). The reason I didn't tell them is because I didn't want them to have the burden of keeping it a secret. I will tell them once I start losing some darn weight! I did tell them I am on a diet (which I am). So it is absolutely 100% possible. I didn't tel them I had any kind of surgery because I didn't want them to worry. They thought i wentto a conference for work overnight. I have mixed feelings about not being 100% honest but I really didn't want them to keep a secret that is mine to kept.

[54Shirley 105]

You don't have to tell her, but with the aches and pains, that you possibly will have. Unless you are good at covering up the pain. She might figure that something is up. If you have to,,, if it's not to bad, then say something like I had a tooth pulled. If it's bad,,,, I would go with the Gallbladder. Who knows,, she might be helpful to you.

[jennifer1 180]

i had a hiatal hernia repaired when i had my band placed. the people i didnt want to know i just told them i had a hernai repaired. that way they know i had surgery, which would explain my pain etc. best wishes

[anewchapter 0]

Thanks everyone for your replies...very very helpful...I think I will go with the hernia repair instead of gallbladder. I don't like to lie to people either, but sometimes it's just none of their business.

[crash878905 2]

Hello All,

Wow, I seem to have a lot of questions today.....

I know that telling people about my lapband is my decision. Part of me wants to tell the world and the other part doesn't want anyone to know. I read the "food police" discussion and it has got me thinking.

I have told my parents and a couple of my closest friends aobut my decision. However the problem is that I rent my extra bedroom to a girl that, honesty, I don't want her to know. She never really had any issues with food or her weight till she was 25-30 (we are now both 33). In the last year she has lost 50 lbs and is basically at her goal. She is really not a close friend of mine, it just works out well for us both to be roommates. I really don't want to tell her and we don't eat very many meals together, but I just don't see it being possible not to tell her because we live together.

Any thoughts?? Could it be possible to have this surgery and not tell someone you live with??

I'm glad you posted this cause telling people about the band worried me more than actually going through a surgical procedure. It probably sounds ridiculous to most people, but it's true. After talking with my mom (who got the Realize Band) and my dad (both are my greatest supporters) and coming on this website. I realized that this is for ME. And only me. IT sounds so basic, but when it comes down to it, it is that simple. Whether your roommate is left in the dark or knows about it, do what YOU feel comfortable with most. I realized that people will say what they say and think what they think, no matter what you do. I was just banded last week and if someone askes what happens, I just tell them I had gastric band surgery. I find it almost liberating. I do feel out the person first though and will tell them if I don't think they'll preach to me about what a terrible choice I made. Also, 3 days before surgery I told me aunt. Everything in me was telling me not to tell her because she would have a bad reaction. But I told her. Boy was I right. I felt terrible from her reaction. She just said "you're really getting surgery....?" and gave this look like 'why woudl you do that???'. So if and when you decide to tell people, I would say just prepare yourself for some of the reactions you get and remember why you got this surgery... FOR YOU.

Best of luck, I'd love it if you'd keep me updated on what happens!

[anewchapter 0]

Best of luck, I'd love it if you'd keep me updated on what happens!

Thanks so much. This is for me and I do have to keep reminding myself of that. I always want to make sure everyone is happy and sometimes that means I'm not...but that will change. And forsure I'll keep you posted. For no....I've decided I'm not going to tell her.

Thanks