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Emotional Stages of Lapband



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This is so true! I am still grieving after almost a year.

I would add stage where you greive over the loss of food as your comfort, entertainment, distraction....etc. And find other ways of coping and enjoying yourself. I think this is a stage that really has to come before you are able to recognize your sweet spot but can come almost anywhere on the list. I think I am in your final stage, it isn't completely smooth sailing but I have enough restriction and am loosing 2 lbs a week. I have gone a week without getting stuck or being overly full, my goal right now is to stop when satisfied and to take as long as it takes to eat, no rushing. Exercise is now something I crave so I hope it lasts for the rest of my life. I also see that there is at least one more phase, maintenance. I have no real clue about that one other than I will have to again change my relationship with food a bit.

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Love all of these posts! I'm still a pretty new Bandster, but can totally relate to many of the emotions. I love the letter to the office food. What a great strategy.

My break-up with food has been a difficult process, but I am learning how not to misuse it and look forward to beginning a new, healthy relationship with food.

Thanks for making my day everyone! :D

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I would add stage where you greive over the loss of food as your comfort, entertainment, distraction....etc. And find other ways of coping and enjoying yourself. I think this is a stage that really has to come before you are able to recognize your sweet spot but can come almost anywhere on the list. I think I am in your final stage, it isn't completely smooth sailing but I have enough restriction and am loosing 2 lbs a week. I have gone a week without getting stuck or being overly full, my goal right now is to stop when satisfied and to take as long as it takes to eat, no rushing. Exercise is now something I crave so I hope it lasts for the rest of my life. I also see that there is at least one more phase, maintenance. I have no real clue about that one other than I will have to again change my relationship with food a bit.

You said it Sister Sue,

I could not find an emotion for what i was feeling and it was a time of greiving. Maybe its only me but i had a relationship with food and i turned to it for everything. Then one day you have to turn your back to it. There have been times that i feel like a junky for eating food. as if i had to hide from the world. GRIEF. thats the word to describe how i felt at time.

Thanks Sue.

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Super interesting! I can relate so very much to the lists or stages!!!

I did a very detailed and long research on banding before deciding to take the plunge. Dr. Mora requires all kind of counseling, dieticians, and support group meetings before you qualify with him for surgery. Lots of wonderful information from his staff, too.

Even though I researched the proceedure, I don't think I did enough information gathering about what to expect....what to really expect.... after the surgery. I know I read things and understood the basics, but think my mind was REALLY concentrating on getting and understanding the surgery. Does that make sense to anyone?

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:rolleyes: Love your post, so true. Even though I tried to research as much as I could, I felt a little deserted once I was banded. You summed it up well. I was banded May 11, dropped about 15 pounds or so rather quickly - Water, I guess - got my first fill mid-June. Had my first episode of the sliming etc only yesterday. Don't want to do that again. I feel like I stil l eat too much, so I need to make a very conscious effort to eat slower, chew better and really be aware of what I'm eating. I slacked off Proteins too. I was hoping to be down another 10 before I go back to the doctor...Hmmm...I wonder if I can still do that.

I am right there with ya MarciaLynn!! I was banded 4/26/11 and I've lost about 20 pounds but now I just lose and regain the same 2-3 pounds. I know I eat too much...and I know I eat too fast...and I know I don't chew enough. I know what I have to do...just gotta get my arse in gear and do it!!

Oh...and I work for a candy company!!! So I'm surrounded by M&Ms, Combos, Snickers, etc. on a daily basis!! Luckily I don't really have a sweet tooth...but there is just always food around.

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I wrote a letter to the office Snacks telling them we had to break up. The letter was pretty vulgar (e.g. - F U office Cheetos for giving me back fat, hahah). I seriously did that and then threw the letter away, and I now stay away from the office goodies. Another thing I did was imagine all of the dirty birdies in this world who don't wash their hands after the restroom, and that their hot mess gets on the snack packaging when they rummage through the snack basket :) Awesome diversion technique.

OMG this was hysterical!!

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I am right there with ya MarciaLynn!! I was banded 4/26/11 and I've lost about 20 pounds but now I just lose and regain the same 2-3 pounds. I know I eat too much...and I know I eat too fast...and I know I don't chew enough. I know what I have to do...just gotta get my arse in gear and do it!!

Oh...and I work for a candy company!!! So I'm surrounded by M&Ms, Combos, Snickers, etc. on a daily basis!! Luckily I don't really have a sweet tooth...but there is just always food around.

I'm starting to lose/regain/lose/regain the same one pound, even though I am eating the right amount of Protein, and drinking the right amount of liquids, while still staying under 800 calories a day. Really frustrating. Last time that happened, I was staying under 500 calories a day--so I jacked it up to 800 and started losing! Weird! Maybe I should now jack it up to 900 or 1000??

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There should be another stage and that is greiving the loss. What I mean is that 110 lost and I still sometimes feel that I am that heavier person. Looking in the mirror does not help until I look at pictures of the FAT me.

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I have noticed several stages with the lapband-the stages tend to vary from person to person, but this is what I have come up with so far:

  • Stage 1 - excitement!! You can't wai tto get through all your appoinments and make this life changing committment!
  • Stage 2- doubt, right before surgery you begin to second guess yourself and wonder if you are really making the right decision and wondering why you can't do this on your own
  • Stage 3- Amazed that you actually went through the surgery hoping it was the right decision and worried about healing and eating the right foods
  • Stage 4- it's been a few weeks and you haven't lost that much. You are wondering if you are going to be one of the ones who struggle even with the band. You might feel frustrated at the slow weight loss and only hope that a a fill will help.
  • Stage 5 - you got your fill!! At this stage you either feel some restriction and are very hopeful (at least for the first few days) or feel nothing and are wondering when the heck the band is going to start to do something-anything-you are hungry!
  • Stage 6 - You cheated with some food that you know darn well that you shouldn't have eaten! You may be feeling low at this point and a little disappointed in the band and in yourself. You can't wait until your next fill! You may also be hard on yourself thinking that you had surgery and still are having problems losing the weight!
  • Stage 7- I haven't gotten to this stage yet but I sure hope it brings me a little closer to the "Promised Bandland" Some good weight loss would be welcomed!

Please feel free to add some stages!!

I am amazed at how little info you get from the doctors prior to surgery. With the band you really need to know that the weight won't come off quickly (for most bandsters) and it will take several months to get into the zone. The trick is to stay motivated and committed to the process. For every bad choice you make you need to think about how you could have handled it better and plan for the future so it doesn't happen again. Once you reach stages 4-6 you need to ask yourself a few questions such as:

  • Am I drinking enough Water? How much water did I drink today? Is there a better way I can prepare for my water intake?
  • Am I waiting 30-45 minutes to drink liquids after I eat?
  • Am I planning meals? Are these meals high in Protein? Am I eating my protein first?
  • How am I doing with my vitamins-am I taking them every day?
  • Am I trying to do a little exercise?

Every morning that you wake up take a few moments to recommitt yourself to this process-it can work and others have had the same roadblocks and have gone through the same struggles and self-doubt-but the secret is to not et your fears take over. You really are so much stronger than you know!! The fact that you even had this surgery is a huge indicator of your commitment. Keep positive thoughts in your life as you journey to the Promised Bandland!!

[/quote

NJgirl,

Your list is right on! I have encountered the first 4 Stages. I had my surgery on May 27th, and losing weight super slow. I sometimes don't even realize I have anything in me. I feel normal, but, still sticking to my healthy eating. I was feeling a bit discouraged, too! But, I was dealing with other medical issues this past week, which required a trip to ER, (nothing related to my lapband). I gained 1.5 and all day I have been thinking, how I didn't drink enough water, forgot my Vitamins, maybe stress from the pain I was encountering has made me retain water. Either way, I know I keep reminding myself why I got the surgery done and need to stay focused! I am looking forward to my first fill next week. But, a bit nervous!

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This is a great topic. I am not banded yet, but I already KNOW myself enough to KNOW that I will definitley hit that 'grieving' stage as well. I know it's for my own good, but it will be tough. I am a sweets eater, (and pretty much all carbs, in general) and I struggle so much with things (lunches, goodies, etc..) that are being brought into our office every week, 2 or 3 times a week. This will be a hard one for me, but I NEED it to help me not be able to go overboard with those treats. I will have to work at what I put in my mouth, just as I do now, while following my weight loss plan I'm on now.

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