Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Married ladies, did your dh go to your PS consult with you?



Recommended Posts

Hi, I totally understand what you are asking. I am dealing with the same situation. I have 5 consultations coming up and I told my husband he can go with me but I prefer he stays in the waiting room. He has been very supportive from day one and I have a past experience with sexual abuse so he understands why I prefer he stays in the waiting room. I told him after the surgery and all the swelling is over I will show him a before picture lol. I know this sounds strange..but it works for us.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

OK, I'm stupid but what exactly does DH stand for?

Anyway I would never even consider doing anything like that to my body without my husband there. He is my biggest fan and advocate and he is smart. Of course I would set ground rules first because he carries on about the stupidest things sometimes and we would have discussed what I wanted done way ahead of time. But it is a personal choice and I hope all goes well for you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I agree I think when it is surgery DH should know about it and be there to support you. Maybe ask a question that is important to him. Its surgery!!! When i scheduled my LapBand surgery my DH was coming and then we found he could not get off of work so I went anyway. I had already built it up in my mind. So my mom took me and brought me home and he took care of me at home. He has seen your body so just relax and let him go.

Cheri

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I had 5 surgeries in less than 2 years. 2 shoulders, Gall Bladder, Lap Band, and Breast reduction with a lift. My husband went to all appt. with me, held my hand throught it all. Changed my babdages, fed me, made sure I always had everything I needed, most of all loved me through it all. it has been a year since my last surgery. He still sleeps in the spare room and hasn't wanted to be intimate with me. he is still very loving and suporrtive, but I think he saw me as a patient and now has a hard time seeing me as a loving wife. I think the breast reduction sent him over the edge. It was brutal.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I know I'm joining this topic late, and you may have already made your decision, but I had to chime in when you made the comment about your SIL's thighs. TOO FUNNY!! It proves my point though, which is this: you have a definite view of your body and your husband most likely has a definite DIFFERENT view of it. We all see ourselves and others differently. I went to all my consults alone. I never thought of bringing anyone with me actually! I would think they'd just be bored. Then again, my husband and I are pretty independent like that. He was there for me in every way after my TT and breast lift, but I didn't feel the need to have him in the consults. He offered to come with me when I had the surgery and I had a friend take me because I'd rather him use his time off from work after the surgery to take care of me...not to sit in the waiting room for hours!! I will add though...I had Lipo to my thighs a few months ago and he took me on the day of the surgery (it was a quick in and out procedure). He was sitting in the exam room when the surgeon came in to mark me up. It was very uncomfortable for me to be standing STARK naked in front of another man while my husband sat a few feet away. He said it was akward for him too, even though we both, obviously, were well aware that he is a doctor and is supposed to see me naked...it was weird. Best of luck with your decision, and your surgery. I'm so happy with my decision to go through with it I hope you will be too!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I know I'm joining this topic late, and you may have already made your decision, but I had to chime in when you made the comment about your SIL's thighs. TOO FUNNY!! It proves my point though, which is this: you have a definite view of your body and your husband most likely has a definite DIFFERENT view of it. We all see ourselves and others differently. I went to all my consults alone. I never thought of bringing anyone with me actually! I would think they'd just be bored. Then again, my husband and I are pretty independent like that. He was there for me in every way after my TT and breast lift, but I didn't feel the need to have him in the consults. He offered to come with me when I had the surgery and I had a friend take me because I'd rather him use his time off from work after the surgery to take care of me...not to sit in the waiting room for hours!! I will add though...I had Lipo to my thighs a few months ago and he took me on the day of the surgery (it was a quick in and out procedure). He was sitting in the exam room when the surgeon came in to mark me up. It was very uncomfortable for me to be standing STARK naked in front of another man while my husband sat a few feet away. He said it was akward for him too, even though we both, obviously, were well aware that he is a doctor and is supposed to see me naked...it was weird. Best of luck with your decision, and your surgery. I'm so happy with my decision to go through with it I hope you will be too!

I too went to my consultations by myself. I would not have objected to my husband coming with but it did not make sense for him to take time off of work for a consultation. He saved his time off and took 4 days with me after my TT. It's funny, your post said you were uncomfortable standing naked being marked up in front of your husband. I was ok with that but DH later told me it was kind of weird watching me naked with another man, on his knees, drawing lines on me. DH took great care of me - he is the best. In fact he is encourageing me to have my arms done too.

Best of luck.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • cryoder22

      Day 1 of pre-op liquid diet (3 weeks) and I'm having a hard time already. I feel hungry and just want to eat. I got the protein and supplements recommend by my program and having a hard time getting 1 down. My doctor / nutritionist has me on the following:
      1 protein shake (bariatric advantage chocolate) with 8 oz of fat free milk 1 snack = 1 unjury protein shake (root beer) 1 protein shake (bariatric advantage orange cream) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein bar 1 protein shake (bariatric advantace orange cream or chocolate) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein soup (chicken) 3 servings of sugar free jello and popsicles throughout the day. 64 oz of water (I have flavor packets). Hot tea and coffee with splenda has been approved as well. Does anyone recommend anything for the next 3 weeks?
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        All I can tell you is that for me, it got easier after the first week. The hunger pains got less intense and I kind of got used to it and gave up torturing myself by thinking about food. But if you can, get anything tempting out of the house and avoid being around people who are eating. I sent my kids to my parents' house for two weeks so I wouldn't have to prepare meals I couldn't eat. After surgery, the hunger was totally gone.

    • buildabetteranna

      I have my final approval from my insurance, only thing holding up things is one last x-ray needed, which I have scheduled for the fourth of next month, which is my birthday.

      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BetterLeah

      Woohoo! I have 7 more days till surgery, So far I am already down a total of 20lbs since I started this journey. 
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Well done! I'm 9 days away from surgery! Keep us updated!

    • Ladiva04

      Hello,
      I had my surgery on the 25th of June of this year. Starting off at 117 kilos.😒
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Congrats on the surgery!

    • Sandra Austin Tx

      I’m 6 days post op as of today. I had the gastric bypass 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×