Posting Reality Check

[LargeMediumSmall 3]

Sometimes we need a reality check when it comes to bands. The experience is different for everyone, physically, emotionally, medically but one thing is the same for everyone...The Lap-Band is a tool. Sometimes tools work, sometimes they break, sometimes we run over them with the car and sabotage them so we can't do any more work.

Whether you have had tremendous success and smooth sailing or have had difficulty and trauma please share what you have learned with everyone but remember that we are here to inform, educate, inspire and seek answers, not spread negativity, gloom and fear.

I wish everyone who has opted for this surgery learning, success, and good health.

[hopetolose 192]

Very nicely said!

[Karon 1]

Yes you are so right. I enjoy the stories but hate the doom and gloom. I wish people would keep their negativity to themselves.

[rowekins 1]

Well said! I'm only a month post op, and I've not really lost yet since surgery. I know I have to wait to heal, and my band is empty. I CAN say that I have learned SO much since I started my journey. Even if I fail the band (fingers crossed against that one), I think I've been given enough education to make changes for the better! I plan to use the band to my fullest and hope for thin roads ahead!!

[jen120 23]

Someone else posted this article. I thought it was great so I wanted to share it in this thread. It really helped me understand what the band is really supposed to do. Enjoy...

http://drsimpson.net/fills/Lap-band-eating/lap-band-not-restriction/lap-band-and-restriction.html

[LargeMediumSmall 3]

I just found his website a few days ago when doing research for my own blog. He's got some great info on there. I am the official blogger for my doc, Dr. Titus Duncan in Atlanta so shhhh, don't tell him I'm secretly getting info from other docs. Dr. Duncan is still my favorite though.

I liked Dr. Simpson's informtion on sous vide cooking. I am a vegetarian now but my husband is in the meat industry and he says that thismethod of cooking, when done right, yields very flavorful and ultra tender meat.

I try to understand as much as I can about the band for my sake and for the sake of my readers. All information is helpful.

[reverie 49]

Yes you are so right. I enjoy the stories but hate the doom and gloom. I wish people would keep their negativity to themselves.

It's a support forum, what do you expect? People come here when they're having problems. The band isn't all rainbows and butterflies; no WLS is.

[LargeMediumSmall 3]

You are absolutely right. Weight loss surgery isn't all rainbows and butterflies. What I'm saying is that all issues should be discussed but sheer negativity for the sake of trying to bring other people down is really uncool.

There are people out there with serious weight loss surgery gone awry issues. They need answers, support and guidance not negativity.

So let's keep the flaming, accusations, negativity and finger pointing to a minimum and the support, love, & understanding and valid answers priority one.

[LargeMediumSmall 3]

Here's a good example of what I'm talking about. Recently I read a post of a poor woman who had to have multiple surgeries because her Realize band came apart at the port. She tried to contact the manufacturer to ask them to pay for the surgical revision as the problem stemmed from their defective, and already recalled product. The manufacturer declined.

In her post she said she sought the help of lawyers. One of the first replies from posters was a comment on the fact that people are sue happy. She never said she was going to sue. She was simply seeking help to get the manufacturer to pay for the surgery as her doctor would certainly charge her. Several people made comments about lawyers and lawsuits.

I could tell this poor woman was misunderstood. She was simply seeking help and advice from lawyers and frankly I think she actually does deserve some compensation for lost wages and suffering but she just wants her band to work.

The point is, people flamed her for no reason which is the premise for this original post of this thread. Support, answers, sharing no matter what the situation....not negativity and flaming.

[mauraclegg 29]

Well said! It has been gloomy here as of late- tbh I have friends who are interested in banding, but not telling 'em to cone here because of the negative lately. :o/

[LargeMediumSmall 3]

I blog for my doctor on realresultswls.com They may not have my name on them but I write almost all of them. Feel free to send your friends there there, it's very positive and informative. My doctor's marketing firm just offered me my own blog website. They are creating it and it will be up and running soon. Feel free to keep in contact with me via Facebook or here for more details. I don't profit from either blog, I just do it for education and my own personal therapy but I could use all the input and friends I can get. Thanks, Samantha Hall

[bluekerry 3]

I agree on the negativity. I was banded the 9th of June and I read all the scary stuff and questioned whether I was doing the right thing. Almost backed out! But I went ahead with the banding and I have to say that I've had none of the post-op problems discussed here. I know people have problems and this is where to come for support. I've read all the success stories and I hope one day I can write mine. Please keep in mind the newbie like me, we need encouragement.

[Rachel412 116]

This board is incredibly positive compared to some others!

[Dave_NW 92]

I think this forum is a micro version of any group of like-minded people you'd find anywhere. If you walk into a room full of people, you'll find some who are nothing but positive, some who are nothing but negative, and most who "go with the flow." The personality types who are strongest will lead the conversation, and try to convince others in the room to think the way they do. It's human nature.

For me, the LBT forum has been a great resource, not necessarily because of just the good posts, but because of ALL the posts. Even those who are all doom and gloom, who SCREAM EVERYTHING IN ALL CAPITAL LETTERS WITH SIXTEEN EXCLAMATION POINTS AFTER EVERY SENTENCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It isn't because I agree with everything being said, but because I can take that post and step back, comparing it to how my own journey is going. I'm not going to experience the same things everyone else does. My band is my own, and my body's response to my band is also my own. I can learn from the experience of others, and not have to experience that problem to learn from it. I consider the general aspect of the post, whatever its topic is, and compare it to how my own journey is going. I may or may not reply to the post, if I think I have anything to contribute that may help talk that person down off the ledge a bit, or help to allay the fears of a newbie who is not sure just what the heck is going on. Time and experience brings perspective, and sometimes all people need to hear is a few calm words, so they can relax a bit.

My experience with the band is often that what I was told pre-banding is a bit (or a lot) different than what has materialized post-banding. The people I talked to pre-banding at my surgeon's office are medical staff, but none are band patients. They have theoretical experience, but no real-world experience. I immediately realized their comments have to be considered in that light. I made some friends here at LBT that I communicate with offline, whose experience I can compare notes with, but who are having their own journey with this. I found my own experience is very personal, so I turned the mirror inward, and I focus on what is working for me, and how to avoid the pitfalls I see others fall into. Things have worked out well for me, because I've been able to understand what is happening inside my own body, and I've been able to respond to my own situation.

I'm a generally positive person by nature, and I find I'm someone a lot of people come to for advice. (Not just about banding, but about a lot of things in life.) I try to be helpful, but usually turn the freaked-out person around to step out of their crisis of the moment, to step back, and think of things with a clearer head. Most of the time, people find their own answers, and they're appreciative that they had someone to consult.

In that room full of people I first mentioned, when I hear the totally negative person trying to recruit kindred spirits, I'll tend to keep my mouth shut, or I may offer a pointed comment to give others something else to consider. If someone asks my opinion I'll share it. But throughout I'll consider the source, and cut the negative person some slack. I've learned some people try to make themselves feel better by gathering a crowd who'll stand with them and cheer them on. The advantage I have is being able to set aside such comments, because I know the person is only being emotional about the topic because they're highly invested in the situation (especially as a bandster), and things are not going as they expected it would. Those same people tend to come back later much more relaxed, once the crisis has passed.

So for me, it's all about listening to my own experience and common sense, taking things I read here with a grain of salt, and considering the source. If someone is repeatedly negative just for the sake of being negative, I just stop reading their posts. Life is too short to try and educate those who won't learn. And when absolute push comes to shove, I try and follow the sign I saw on the wall above the desk of a former boss, who was a shoot-from-the-hip, damn-the-torpedoes, seriously contrary person of the highest degree. The sign said:

"When they're running you out of town, try to get in front of the crowd and make it look like a parade."

Dave

[roziecakes 20]

You are absolutely right. Weight loss surgery isn't all rainbows and butterflies. What I'm saying is that all issues should be discussed but sheer negativity for the sake of trying to bring other people down is really uncool.

This is SO true! Being realistic and talking about the negative stuff is much different than trying to bring others down.

I think that some of the negative patterns that have made some of us overweight have to do with a 'victim' or 'misery loves company' complex. Some people need tragedy and drama to feel comfortable. My ex-husband was like that. Note that I said 'ex' husband. I just didn't need that in my life.

Thanks for this thread by the way.