Let's be realistic, folks~

[Wheelchair 13]

Hi everyone,

I haven't been on this site too long... and I've only been banded for a week. But I've been seeing a trend on this site along with most of the other WLS support sites and I just wanted to make a post.

I'm not aiming this post at anyone, instead, I think creating this thread will hopefully show that I'm just venting my opinions. Agree or disagree...the choice is yours and will be respected.

First of all, there is a common string that binds ALL of us here, banded or not. All of us have fought with weight issues for several years and have elected to go on with this surgery as a last ditch effort to better our lives. Having said that, there are lots of 'cliquey' behavior that isolate those who haven't yet been banded or those that may have been banded for awhile. With this being a support site, I think it is important to value opinions and thoughts of everyone.

Secondly, I think there abounds a great deal of irrational and unrealistic goals and expectations coming from lots of members. Weight loss, in its core, is simple. Everyone knows this. You use more than you eat and your body will naturally go into a catabolic mode and burn fat as the energy source. Being an ex-Marine, it is difficult for me to understand (and more importantly sympathize) why some people are so baffled that they are not losing weight, while knowingly disobeying the most important rules for diet with the Lap Band.

This leads to various topics that I've seen regarding RATE of weight loss. There are members concerned that they are not 'losing weight fast enough'.

What does that even mean?

A wrestling trainer can get any of us on this site to drop 5 pounds in the next two hours with a sweat suit and a sauna. Does this mean anything?

If you've lost 30 pounds during your pre-op diet and the first couple weeks after surgery...most of that 30 pounds is Water. I'm really sorry to disappoint you there.

Are we here to lose WEIGHT or are we here to lose FAT? PLEASE ASK YOURSELVES THIS!

Experts agree that it takes 3500 Calories to gain or lose one pound of BODY FAT. This is why health professionals say that healthy weight loss is rated at one to two pounds lost per week. If you decrease your intake (or increase your output) by 500 Calories per day, that's one pound of body fat per week.

But through this brilliant medical intervention, we are able to further our intake limitations. Let's take the typical 2000 Calorie per day diet for an 'average' human being. If the band allows you to decrease your food intake and you eat only a 1000 Calories a day... your body is at a 1000 Calorie per day deficit. Simple math dictates that you'd have a weight loss rate of 2 pounds of body fat per week.

Are you a bit more realistic in your expectations now?

The problem here is that at 1000 Calorie per day diet, your body is again at a catabolic state. Of course you lose fat..but you start losing your lean body mass as well. So that 2 pounds of body fat...isn't all body fat. To prevent this... doctors suggest that you maintain about 1200 to 1500 Calorie diet with plenty of Protein, along with some weight lifting exercises.

Trust me (especially you ladies)... you won't look like Arnold the ex-governator. If it were so easy to bulk up in muscle... most of us wouldn't be here anyhow. Putting in weight lifting into your workout regimen will burn the FAT faster and longer.

So let's be realistic, folks...

Strive for ONE pound of body fat per week. No more, no less. The whole point of this surgery is to get all of us healthier. If you starve yourself and lose 100,000 pounds and become one of the Olsen twins... you're still in trouble. Health troubles exist on both ends of the spectrum.

If you've got 100+ pounds of excess body fat. Give yourself at least 2 years to do this.

If you've got 50 pounds.... do it in a year.

No one told you that will be the cure-all. EVERYONE told you that you'll still have to work your ass off to lose weight.

I know...I know...you hear of people losing 100+ pounds in a year. Yes, it's still possible. But then again..it's POSSIBLE for ALL of us to lose all the weight WITHOUT the band. I'm just saying... let's be realistic.

And please.... GET RID OF YOUR WEIGHT SCALES!!!

Your weight displayed on your scales is NO indication of your weight loss. Like I said... I can get you to drop 5 pounds in two hours. Instead... I think we should be more focused on NON-scale VICTORIES. Things like:

• decrease in dress/ pants size
• increase in amount of activity, energy
• decrease (or increase) in diameter of certain body parts

Lastly, I want to say that I've never been the one to 'baby' someone. At only 25 years old, I've gone through things that you wouldn't wish on your worst enemy and it's stiffened me up to face life and face reality. I'll go ahead and apologize if my posts or remarks seem negative or discouraging.. but that's not my intent. I've lost sensation and movement in over 75% of my body... I can't pee or poo within my control.... and I'll never be able to dance at my future wedding or lift my future newborn baby off the floor. But I still love life and I still enjoy it. I wouldn't have been able to do it without dusting off the 'trivialities' of life.

So let's live people. I know things are hard for you...but trust me... those same things are harder for me.

[Allison0927 329]

I like it - good information and good post. I actually really hope you're right that the ones complaining on this site about not losing are truly breaking the rules - I want that to be true since I want the opposite to be true as well (if I follow all the rules to a T I will definitely lose weight on the band).

[JakerT5 8]

You are right about a lot of things , I had surgery on Jan 28th , starting weight 263 , as of today I weigh 208 , I have had 2 fills and my last fill on was on April 4th , I have not even started excersing yet , what I have been doing is change my eating habits and watch what I eat and when I eat it

[DrmBig4Evr 152]

Completely agree with everything said. And as with most of us, we know how to lose weight, but we need to get our mind focused on it. I have yet to be banded but have lost significant weight on my own and it is not easy. From the wording and "tone" of your post, you truly are a marine. I have many friends who are marines and this is reality. Keep your approach up and all of the attached medical issues due to your weight will get better. That is why I am even considering it. Thank you for the post and congrats on your decision.

[mauraclegg 29]

This is a great post and even though seeing the scale move down it is those NSV that mean much more

[dandi2005 1]

A good reality check for me about the rush to lose weight ...the past few weeks I've stepped on and off the scale several times a day! lol Thank you for your post!

[Jack 855]

Nicely stated Marine!!! Thanks for the reality check!

[MelissaNY 16]

I also agree !!!

[andrea0121 28]

Love this. Thanks for the reality/gut check.

[ctwebb727 0]

Hi everyone,

I haven't been on this site too long... and I've only been banded for a week. But I've been seeing a trend on this site along with most of the other WLS support sites and I just wanted to make a post.

I'm not aiming this post at anyone, instead, I think creating this thread will hopefully show that I'm just venting my opinions. Agree or disagree...the choice is yours and will be respected.

First of all, there is a common string that binds ALL of us here, banded or not. All of us have fought with weight issues for several years and have elected to go on with this surgery as a last ditch effort to better our lives. Having said that, there are lots of 'cliquey' behavior that isolate those who haven't yet been banded or those that may have been banded for awhile. With this being a support site, I think it is important to value opinions and thoughts of everyone.

Secondly, I think there abounds a great deal of irrational and unrealistic goals and expectations coming from lots of members. Weight loss, in its core, is simple. Everyone knows this. You use more than you eat and your body will naturally go into a catabolic mode and burn fat as the energy source. Being an ex-Marine, it is difficult for me to understand (and more importantly sympathize) why some people are so baffled that they are not losing weight, while knowingly disobeying the most important rules for diet with the Lap Band.

This leads to various topics that I've seen regarding RATE of weight loss. There are members concerned that they are not 'losing weight fast enough'.

What does that even mean?

A wrestling trainer can get any of us on this site to drop 5 pounds in the next two hours with a sweat suit and a sauna. Does this mean anything?

If you've lost 30 pounds during your pre-op diet and the first couple weeks after surgery...most of that 30 pounds is Water. I'm really sorry to disappoint you there.

Are we here to lose WEIGHT or are we here to lose FAT? PLEASE ASK YOURSELVES THIS!

Experts agree that it takes 3500 Calories to gain or lose one pound of BODY FAT. This is why health professionals say that healthy weight loss is rated at one to two pounds lost per week. If you decrease your intake (or increase your output) by 500 Calories per day, that's one pound of body fat per week.

But through this brilliant medical intervention, we are able to further our intake limitations. Let's take the typical 2000 Calorie per day diet for an 'average' human being. If the band allows you to decrease your food intake and you eat only a 1000 Calories a day... your body is at a 1000 Calorie per day deficit. Simple math dictates that you'd have a weight loss rate of 2 pounds of body fat per week.

Are you a bit more realistic in your expectations now?

The problem here is that at 1000 Calorie per day diet, your body is again at a catabolic state. Of course you lose fat..but you start losing your lean body mass as well. So that 2 pounds of body fat...isn't all body fat. To prevent this... doctors suggest that you maintain about 1200 to 1500 Calorie diet with plenty of Protein, along with some weight lifting exercises.

Trust me (especially you ladies)... you won't look like Arnold the ex-governator. If it were so easy to bulk up in muscle... most of us wouldn't be here anyhow. Putting in weight lifting into your workout regimen will burn the FAT faster and longer.

So let's be realistic, folks...

Strive for ONE pound of body fat per week. No more, no less. The whole point of this surgery is to get all of us healthier. If you starve yourself and lose 100,000 pounds and become one of the Olsen twins... you're still in trouble. Health troubles exist on both ends of the spectrum.

If you've got 100+ pounds of excess body fat. Give yourself at least 2 years to do this.

If you've got 50 pounds.... do it in a year.

No one told you that will be the cure-all. EVERYONE told you that you'll still have to work your ass off to lose weight.

I know...I know...you hear of people losing 100+ pounds in a year. Yes, it's still possible. But then again..it's POSSIBLE for ALL of us to lose all the weight WITHOUT the band. I'm just saying... let's be realistic.

And please.... GET RID OF YOUR WEIGHT SCALES!!!

Your weight displayed on your scales is NO indication of your weight loss. Like I said... I can get you to drop 5 pounds in two hours. Instead... I think we should be more focused on NON-scale VICTORIES. Things like:

• decrease in dress/ pants size
• increase in amount of activity, energy
• decrease (or increase) in diameter of certain body parts

Lastly, I want to say that I've never been the one to 'baby' someone. At only 25 years old, I've gone through things that you wouldn't wish on your worst enemy and it's stiffened me up to face life and face reality. I'll go ahead and apologize if my posts or remarks seem negative or discouraging.. but that's not my intent. I've lost sensation and movement in over 75% of my body... I can't pee or poo within my control.... and I'll never be able to dance at my future wedding or lift my future newborn baby off the floor. But I still love life and I still enjoy it. I wouldn't have been able to do it without dusting off the 'trivialities' of life.

So let's live people. I know things are hard for you...but trust me... those same things are harder for me.

[ctwebb727 0]

Great post!

[vickyd 24]

I couldn't agree more...well said!!:thumbup:

[Rachel412 116]

I agree with everything you said. BUT.

There are certainly people who say that they have the band, and they follow all the doctor's guidelines to a T, and yet they don't lose weight. Since I'm not in their shoes or their houses, I choose to believe them, because I'm not one to assume people are lying. I would much rather have that person come here, express their frustration, and get good advice and tips from successful bandsters rather than give up and tell everyone that this surgery didn't work.

After all, knowing the right thing to do and actually making yourself DO it are two very different things But great post!

[Wheelchair 13]

There are certainly people who say that they have the band, and they follow all the doctor's guidelines to a T, and yet they don't lose weight.

Do you honestly believe this? I'm not calling anyone a liar outright, but I'd just like to ask if you REALLY TRULY believe it.

They follow ALL the guidelines? They limit their intake and increase the daily activity (remember...part of the 'guidelines' for after LAGB include daily 30 minute exercise sessions) and they STILL don't lose weight?

I'm just asking... because if you believe that this is possible.... why would you get the surgery? Why would ANY of us?

This is a support group. This entails helping people currently on the band...but also providing first hand information for those wanting to get the band and change their life. If more people come to the site and start posting threads about following ALL THE DOCTOR'S GUIDELINES TO A T, AND YET THEY DON'T LOSE WEIGHT... it'll just feel so hopeless for everyone. And personally... I don't think it's possible.

I've read some of the threads that you are referring to... members who are concerned that they are not seeing the weight loss even after trying to follow most of the guidelines. But in ALL of those situations...I see various holes. One member would suggest that he/she cannot stomach solid food and so have put themselves on a 'liquid' diet.

Did you know that McDonald's large shake has 582 Calories...of which 150 are mostly saturated fat...and 85 grams of it is sugar?

Or...another member may say... I have salads all the time..and I STILL DON'T LOSE WEIGHT!!!

Well...a grilled chicken salad with light Italian dressing at McAlister's Deli ends up at a whopping 850 calories.

Look. I'm not trying to bore you with numbers.

I'm saying... a lot of the posts made by member who claim not to be losing weight have SERIOUS holes. As a support group...we need to look for these holes that the OP misses... and kindly inform them.

I implore you....actually....i CHALLENGE you.... if you are one of those who are following ALL OF THE GUIDELINES TO THE T.... count your calories. Write a journal of EVERYTHING that goes into your mouth. In that journal..I also want you to write down how much you're exercising in your day. Can't find time?? Park farther from the store... take an extra trip or two up and down the stairs. Walk during your lunch hour. Remember...it takes me a lot longer to put my pants on in the morning...but i STILL find time to exercise.

Don't do this for just a week or two... I want you to do this for at least a month. Good dieting and exercising habits become actual 'habits' in about three weeks and it'll be easier to do these things.

Remember...no one said this was easy. All complaints of "i can't find time...who has the time and energy to jot everything they eat..." will be thoroughly ignored.

NOW TO THE 0.53% OF US!

I asked my surgeon yesterday what types of signs I should be looking for to sniff out a band erosion. He told me... if you're adjusted right... and you're following the guidelines... and you're STILL NOT losing weight. Then we do an endoscopy to see if your band has eroded.

So other serious medical conditions aside... the ONLY reason I can see that a person won't lose weight on the band... is if the band has eroded.

This is 1 out of 200 LAGB patients. Unless we have a concentrated group of EXTREMELY unlucky and unfortunate people... I don't see the ratio working out on the forum.

Then, if you do suspect you have a band erosion... don't waste your time complaining on the forum.... go see your surgeon immediately.

My whole post was to be realistic and HONEST. Not anyone else...but to ourselves.

[Rachel412 116]

Do you honestly believe this? I'm not calling anyone a liar outright, but I'd just like to ask if you REALLY TRULY believe it.

They follow ALL the guidelines? They limit their intake and increase the daily activity (remember...part of the 'guidelines' for after LAGB include daily 30 minute exercise sessions) and they STILL don't lose weight?

I do believe that there are people who follow their surgeon's instructions and still do not lose, because there are surgeons out there who give horrible aftercare directions. Just yesterday I saw someone (and I don't remember if it was here or on a different support site) whose doctor told her after surgery, all she was ever allowed to eat again was meat. I've seen other people who have the surgery and were told that the band alone would make them lose weight- they were given no diet to follow, and weren't educated about fills and follow-up care. So yes, I do think there are instances where someone is doing what they were told, and they're not losing weight.

Do I believe that's always the case? Heck no But I do know I was lucky to have a great surgeon with an amazing team who taught me so much- and I am lucky for that. Of course there are plenty of people who claim they're following the rules, but it turns out they're not, they're just fooling themselves. But until we ask questions and try to help that person, we won't know what's really going on.

Again, everything you're saying is correct. We just look at it a different way, it's probably since you're coming from a male Marine background and I'm coming from a female Mom background You tell it how it is and how it should be, I like to help people get to the root of the problem.

But again, I have no criticism of anything you've said. I'm just pointing out why people who are complaining or "whining" get extra help when they come here.