Tried Starting My Letter

[NewStart95987 35]

I posted before that I was tossing around the idea of writing a letter to loved ones just in case something happened. I'm being banded next Thursday and finally started a letter today. You never know what COULD happen and if you knew me, you would know I like to prepare for everything and plan ahead. I'm no control freak but like to view my possible options before doing anything major and use that as a starting point.

I thought I could take a break from work and start this letter. I had to stop. I was an emotional wreck and couldn't stop crying. I didn't even really get into my letter and will have to finish at home where I can blubber like an idiot to myself.

I feel so stupid and hope, like I wrote in my letter, that no one besides myself will ever read the letter. I just can't help but wonder IF something happened, how my family, my husband and workplace would be effected. I still want to write the letter but had no idea how emotional I would be. Maybe I'm just being stupid. I have so much anxiety and I know it won't go away until I wake up from surgery. Anyone else think I'm crazy? I am such a strong person, always have been but I really surprised myself. I know I am only doing this to myself but again, would really like to be prepared and thought this would help ease my mind. I believe I'm just working myself up even more.

Help!

[TKW 501]

You took me back a year. You sound EXACTLY like me. I did the same thing. Had to have all my ducks in a row and make sure everyone knew exactly how much I loved them and how much they meant to me. Where to bury my body and how to spend the money I left behind. LOL LOL LOL. It was emotional!!! I didn't think it would be but when I got started... I sobbed like a baby. We all have our "quirks", but we gotta do what gives us peace of mind. You'll do great, good luck to ya!

[NewStart95987 35]

UPDATE! I tried looking at it one more time and did very well and was able to start writing. It seems my Mother's message and my husbands will be the downfall and the cause of my blubbering. I'll save these for another time.

[NJGirl32 43]

OMG! I know EXACTLY what you mean! I never told my daughters I was having the surgery so I really wanted to let them know something and thought about writing them letters too. All I wished for was to wake up from the surgery and when I was in recovery I said to myself "I'm alive!, Thank you God!" I think it's a natural fear. I think the change of anything going wrong with Lapband suregery is less than 1%-there great odds! People everyday get much , much, much more complicated surgies and do great , so you shouldn't worry! If a letter is too hard what about a voice recording or if you can tape yourself with a web cam? I opted not to write the letter and to just keep positive.

[WinningLoser 10]

Living this RIGHT now as I am being banded on FRIDAY! So nervous and thinking WHAT IF???? I am so happy I am not alone in thinking this way just 2 days prior to surgery............... LOOK you did it! Using that to help me through my JITTERS!

I posted before that I was tossing around the idea of writing a letter to loved ones just in case something happened. I'm being banded next Thursday and finally started a letter today. You never know what COULD happen and if you knew me, you would know I like to prepare for everything and plan ahead. I'm no control freak but like to view my possible options before doing anything major and use that as a starting point.

I thought I could take a break from work and start this letter. I had to stop. I was an emotional wreck and couldn't stop crying. I didn't even really get into my letter and will have to finish at home where I can blubber like an idiot to myself.

I feel so stupid and hope, like I wrote in my letter, that no one besides myself will ever read the letter. I just can't help but wonder IF something happened, how my family, my husband and workplace would be effected. I still want to write the letter but had no idea how emotional I would be. Maybe I'm just being stupid. I have so much anxiety and I know it won't go away until I wake up from surgery. Anyone else think I'm crazy? I am such a strong person, always have been but I really surprised myself. I know I am only doing this to myself but again, would really like to be prepared and thought this would help ease my mind. I believe I'm just working myself up even more.

Help!