Should I start over?

[peacequeen 434]

I've had previous concerns about my surgeons office but blew it off. Now I'm frustrated again but with my surgeon. I'm almost 6 months into this process from the seminar till now. So far I haven't had much hope. I've had one visit that included an all day feast of tests in March. I failed the psych test so I'm in therapy and seeing a psychiatrist for meds (this was their own psych), my therapist doesn't understand it..since I'm already on meds. The nut told me I needed to go on a 6 month diet because my insurance company requires it but I spoke with 5 different people through my ins. co. and they said they know of no diet I need to be on for 6 months. But she insists, so I'm forced to do it. I'm failing miserably,,I'm actually gaining. I never could diet well, that's why I wanted the surgery. Then they want me to do about 10 different "big" tests, I had one,,an esophageal manometry,,not very pleasant but I went through it because the PA told me the doctor will use this test to determine if I will be able to tolerate the band because I have a condition that causes dysphagia. Well I had it over 2 weeks ago and have heard nothing. I called and had to leave a message with a nurse and that was 3 days ago. How can they expect me to get all excited and diet and be at peace about having this surgery if they won't keep me up on what they are doing? My husband told me he thinks I need a different surgeon. That this office seems like they have way too much on their plate and to let patients worry waiting to get a phone call. I know they are busy but is this normal? I do think it's a bit rude to tell me I can't have surgery unless I pass a test, then not be notified if I even passed the test. I'm just getting worse. My eating is getting more out of control, I have no self esteem, I'm disappointed and I don't know what to do anymore.

[Russian_BANDit_inNY 4]

I would

1 - request copy of your medical file from the doctor office;

2 - report them to your insurance;

3 - find a new doc.

in that specific order - so you would have all the paperwork in hand.

Just my 2c

[lifechange531 0]

I totally agree with Russian Bandit! It sounds like you aren't happy with this surgeon, and I wouldn't be either with the lack of responses they have given you. It sounds like they don't treat you like an individual just another case number and everyone is cookie cutter surgery there, and it sounds like they want way more tests than are absolutely necessary. I would do exactly what Bandit said and go to their office and demand a copy of your file if you have to. You do not and should not put up with a Dr's office that doesn't make you feel like you matter to them.

[54Shirley 105]

If you flunked the Psych Test,,, Some offices will give you a test to see if you understand the process, and realise what is going to be done to you.

You might want to ask your Dr., If he thinks his shrinks word is GOLD, and that you want the surgery. Can it be done See if he says yes or no.

If no get all your paperwork that was described from the lady above, also make copies of everything. Your going to keep your own file in case they lose anything. Then Find a Shrink that specialises in WLS. You were never Depressed, Abused, anything negative that is major that can blow this surgery.

When you get the passed psych.. Of course copy that, then look for a new surgeon to Transfer to, and you will have copies in case anything goes wrong.

If they ask why the change? You just aren't comfortable with him. You will be surprised how the staff will say. O he's a nice guy, he's not like that.

Get a file, and start filling it.

[Rachel412 116]

I don't think that they're necessarily treating you badly, but if you aren't comfortable with them, DEFINITELY find a new practice! You'll be spending a lot of time there after surgery and you really need to trust them and feel comfortable.

[peacequeen 434]

Thanks for all the responses. Is it normal that I have yet to ever meet my surgeon after 6 months? I should've mentioned that. I saw him at the seminar in January..that's it. I didn't really get to talk with him,,there was an open question/response for about 15 minutes but that's all I've seen of him. He had his assistant do all the stuff on pre testing day (meet nutritionist, weigh in, take psych test. etc). He also had someone else do the esophageal manometry. The reason I failed the psych test was because my parents were killed in an accident and it's caused some depression and anxiety and because I have low self esteem from childhood trauma. These are things that I feel are legitimate reasons for therapy. But to use this against me because of my weight is not right. I've sought help on my own over the years and am taking meds. I told this to their psych but he requested for me to continue seeing my therapist and to find a psychiatrist to re evaluate meds. He would not approve me unless I do this and get clearance from them. His "test" was very twisting. Questions like, "have you ever wanted to hurt yourself"? Well, I could lie but I didn't. There were times I thought about it but obviously didn't do it. When I lost my parents, it was everything for me to even want to wake up in the morning. I explained all of this to him. He used every answer I gave as a general answer for all my weight issues,,and I don't think that was fair. I think I was kinda mistreated, I don't think I should be told that I have to have a test in order to have the surgery then be forced to wait longer than normal for results and to never get responses to my calls. I think it's very unprofessional and I am a little nervous about having them do my surgery. I think I do need certain tests because I have health issues (a different post). Having a bunch of tests is not a problem,,it's just the response time (if any) has been ridiculous.

[54Shirley 105]

Thanks for all the responses. Is it normal that I have yet to ever meet my surgeon after 6 months? I should've mentioned that. I saw him at the seminar in January..that's it. I didn't really get to talk with him,,there was an open question/response for about 15 minutes but that's all I've seen of him. He had his assistant do all the stuff on pre testing day (meet nutritionist, weigh in, take psych test. etc). He also had someone else do the esophageal manometry. The reason I failed the psych test was because my parents were killed in an accident and it's caused some depression and anxiety and because I have low self esteem from childhood trauma. These are things that I feel are legitimate reasons for therapy. But to use this against me because of my weight is not right. I've sought help on my own over the years and am taking meds. I told this to their psych but he requested for me to continue seeing my therapist and to find a psychiatrist to re evaluate meds. He would not approve me unless I do this and get clearance from them. His "test" was very twisting. Questions like, "have you ever wanted to hurt yourself"? Well, I could lie but I didn't. There were times I thought about it but obviously didn't do it. When I lost my parents, it was everything for me to even want to wake up in the morning. I explained all of this to him. He used every answer I gave as a general answer for all my weight issues,,and I don't think that was fair. I think I was kinda mistreated, I don't think I should be told that I have to have a test in order to have the surgery then be forced to wait longer than normal for results and to never get responses to my calls. I think it's very unprofessional and I am a little nervous about having them do my surgery. I think I do need certain tests because I have health issues (a different post). Having a bunch of tests is not a problem,,it's just the response time (if any) has been ridiculous.

I understand about the Trauma as a child with the Death of your parents, and I believe you when you say, that it is a legitimate, and they are in my opinion.

The Problem is in a shrinks opinion you have a problem that might take years of Therapy, and Meds.. Then when you are better, you will lose this weight threw clear thinking. (SOMETHING LIKE THAT)

So you have to pull the wool over their eyes so they don't see this.

In other words if you want this surgery, you can't tell him all these problems.

You can continue talking to your Therapist by all means ! But don't tell them anything about the Trauma or that you are Depressed. Yes LIE to them.

Or you will never pass the psych. exam. It's weight Loss Surgery that you want ! So how bad do you really want it. Pass the shrink, and you will be ready to go.

Keep being Glum in their eyes, and it's not gonna happen.

So get your game plan together, and go see another WL Shrink.

Shirley

[peacequeen 434]

Actually the trauma from childhood was something different, my parents were killed several years ago while I was an adult..but that's beside the point..but just wanted to clear that up.

Shirley, you made alot of sense and you're probably right. I just didn't feel like I should lie, it's not in my character. I did want to make sure I was making the right choices and answering all questions as honest as possible. I was under the impression they would help me through everything and that any tests wouldn't rule out surgery but help them to help me???? The psych knew most of my weight gain was because I quit smoking 8 years ago (35 pound gain) then I developed a rare autoimmune disease and was on steroid treatment for a long time and gained 70 more. So why he felt my past trajedies were related, I'm not sure. I do want to have the right mind set, therefore the therapy. I just still have issues with the fact that I haven't met my surgeon who should have already followed up with me about the procedure I had that will determine if I even get to have lapband or not and they won't return my calls. I think that's unprofessional and makes me wonder what my follow up care would be like.

[54Shirley 105]

That's why you need another surgeon. I do relate to not wanting to lie, that's not my thing either, but when your up against them over abuse, Trauma, sexual abuse, anything out of the ordinary. They will flunk you. I know because I told the truth to, Abuse! and that witch flunked my psych evaluation. But the Dr. didn't buy it, he gave me a written test, and I passed it. I then had my surgery.

I'm telling you for your own good, and from experience. No matter what, there is nothing wrong with your past, present, or future with a new shrink. He needs the money, and you will be passed.

[peacequeen 434]

Thanks Shirley..gotcha I have an appointment June 8th with a new psych. I'm following the rules, I've done everything they've asked of me and I've only complained here..only because they won't return my calls or give me my test results. Thanks everyone for the advice and tips. I checked out a couple sites here in our state and set up a new seminar for a different facility for June 3rd. I'm still going to follow through with the psych appt because I'm sure my Insurance company is watching my every move waiting for a screw up. I never in my life have had to deal with so much red tape to get a procedure. It's funny that if you want plastic surgery,,that's much easier (I hear).

[CheckYes 46]

Maybe the doctor who did the esophagus test hasn't yet sent his report over to your surgeon. They need to review it and write it up, I would imagine. It's never just a yes or no kind of thing.

I wish your surgeon had consulted with you before ordering all these tests. I only had to do an EKG and a chest xray. Nothing else - not even psych.

I do agree that if you are not comfortable with the time frame that you find someone else - the problem is that you will have to start the process all over. Keep in kind that after care is really important to your success. You need to have confidence in whichever surgeon you select.

Best wishes!

[peacequeen 434]

Yes, I agree. I should have been told it would take weeks to get the results from a simple outpatient procedure that's about the equivalent of a barium swallow, less invasive than an endoscopy. As of today, I still haven't heard from them. This isn't something I'm just concerned about the results, I am interested to know the findings but it will determine whether I even get to have lapband surgery or not. My next option would be the gastric sleeve which makes me nervous. That would take me back to the beginning too. As everyone here knows, it's just a nerve wracking process, it would be nice if they could just be a little considerate..especially to a person who suffers anxiety.

[peacequeen 434]

Russian Bandit,,I did everything you suggested and I am so thankful I did..so THANKS!!! I am switching clinics/surgeon. I went to the new seminar and am very satisfied with this other facility and the staff that I have met so far. I called today to ask questions and actually talked to a real person and they answered my questions! Who would've thought??lol Seriously, I spoke with their insurance coordinator and she said, you don't have a 6 month diet to follow so I called my insurance company for a 6th time and they assured me,,I do not have a 6 month pre op diet to follow that apparently the "clinic" I was going through was requiring this. I understand some insurance companies do require it but mine isn't one of them. I am glad I've had the extra time though, it's helped me prepare. I was told by the new clinic that all the psych stuff isn't necessary if I'm already in therapy but if it is helping that I should continue so I am. I def want my head straight before I go through all of this. The new clinic has promised I shouldn't have to jump through as many hoops and hopefully they could get the ball rolling quickly. I am now feeling more motivated than ever!! I went today to get all of my records from the old clinic, almost everything I provided was missing. I was also told that all the originals were scanned and then they shred them??? That is odd. So I have to start over but I'm ok, it's worth it to know I'm in better hands now. I don't know which surgery I will be having, I was told that I would not be a good candidate for lapband because of swallowing issues..that I would be better off with the sleeve but the new clinic said they would evaluate me thoroughly then I could decide based on their findings. Wish me luck. Thank you to everyone who commented on this post!

[54Shirley 105]

Congrats ! and Good Luck threw the Process.

Let us know what you decide O.K...

Shirley.

[Msz Alie 0]

Googd luck! Glad to see things are turning around for you!