Got the ball rolling, and now I get crap from my dad!?

[Kayleigh 0]

So I finally got in to see my doctor today and she made all the referrals for me that she would need to. And did everything she could to make sure that I have a good chance of succeeding at this. I got my blood work done to check for things that could be making my weight loss as hard as it is. I openly talk to my friends about doing this, not only do I want my family's support but I want some friends to have my back as well. Some have been great about it but others have just said "just go to a gym." Shows me who my real friends are, huh? Anyways. I was discussing my appointment with a couple friends on Facebook and my dad comes storming in and tells me to take off anything mentioning the surgery. People are apparently "calling him up" going off about I have no idea what exactly. But the thing is, I don't know who the heck would be calling him up telling him things. My posts are all private, etc. I'm not going to NOT mention getting the Lap Band to people for obvious reasons like "How are you losing weight?" or "Why were you out of work for a while?" etc. I'm quite open about doing this and I'm NOT ashamed to mention it to anyone!

So it really seems like my dad wants to keep the entire fact that I'm probably getting "banded" a secret and that he's ashamed of it. Has anyone dealt with having a family member act hateful towards their decision? How have you dealt with it or what have you told them to make them change how they see it?

Any support would be very appreciated, I'd love to have my dad's support on my decision.

[Jenn1214 120]

Is your dad upset about the fact that you want to have the surgery or the fact that people are calling him up and giving him a hard time about it? Did you talk to him about it before mentioning it to your friends? If not maybe he felt hurt that he wasn't one of the first to know about your making such an important decision. Definitely talk to him and see exactly what's bugging him. Let us know how everything turns out!

[Kayleigh 0]

Is your dad upset about the fact that you want to have the surgery or the fact that people are calling him up and giving him a hard time about it? Did you talk to him about it before mentioning it to your friends? If not maybe he felt hurt that he wasn't one of the first to know about your making such an important decision. Definitely talk to him and see exactly what's bugging him. Let us know how everything turns out!

He definitely wasn't the first because he hasn't been very understanding about my whole weight situation anyways.... He gets upset whenever I post anything on Facebook anyways, no clue why. Apparently his old college friends or his co-workers or anyone used to look at my profile and circulate my things back to him even though we're friends on there. My mom was the one who talked to him about my decision to go through with this. Everyone seems to look at this like me taking the "easy way out" when in fact it's not at all. I know I'm going through with this no matter what, because I envision myself buying and wearing my first ever bikini next summer!

Thanks for your post, it helped a lot! I'll definitely try to keep updated. It's great to have a little feedback from someone.

[4Danna 0]

I'm 52 and tonight I found out that both my daughters are not happy that I got banded. They called it un-necessary and one told me that I could lose the weight other ways. I have been trying to lose weight for the last 28 years. I'm sad that my daughters feel that way and I know that I made the right decision. I know that the oldest of the two supports me, but it still sad. I don't like that overweight woman I see in the mirror every morning.

Danna

So I finally got in to see my doctor today and she made all the referrals for me that she would need to. And did everything she could to make sure that I have a good chance of succeeding at this. I got my blood work done to check for things that could be making my weight loss as hard as it is. I openly talk to my friends about doing this, not only do I want my family's support but I want some friends to have my back as well. Some have been great about it but others have just said "just go to a gym." Shows me who my real friends are, huh? Anyways. I was discussing my appointment with a couple friends on Facebook and my dad comes storming in and tells me to take off anything mentioning the surgery. People are apparently "calling him up" going off about I have no idea what exactly. But the thing is, I don't know who the heck would be calling him up telling him things. My posts are all private, etc. I'm not going to NOT mention getting the Lap Band to people for obvious reasons like "How are you losing weight?" or "Why were you out of work for a while?" etc. I'm quite open about doing this and I'm NOT ashamed to mention it to anyone!

So it really seems like my dad wants to keep the entire fact that I'm probably getting "banded" a secret and that he's ashamed of it. Has anyone dealt with having a family member act hateful towards their decision? How have you dealt with it or what have you told them to make them change how they see it?

Any support would be very appreciated, I'd love to have my dad's support on my decision.

[Kayleigh 0]

Thank you, Danna. I know I'm going to go through with my decision no matter what but I know sooner or later he'll come around and agree with me that I made the best decision for myself.

I'm 52 and tonight I found out that both my daughters are not happy that I got banded. They called it un-necessary and one told me that I could lose the weight other ways. I have been trying to lose weight for the last 28 years. I'm sad that my daughters feel that way and I know that I made the right decision. I know that the oldest of the two supports me, but it still sad. I don't like that overweight woman I see in the mirror every morning.

Danna

[jeepygurl 3]

My dad laughed at me, hurt yes but i thought I was doing the right thing, see thing is it's your decsion, as it was mine, I informed my family and supportive or not I did it...... I learned a long time ago can't make everyone happy worry about you

Good luck

[Yasuna 0]

My dad laughed at me, hurt yes but i thought I was doing the right thing, see thing is it's your decsion, as it was mine, I informed my family and supportive or not I did it...... I learned a long time ago can't make everyone happy worry about you

Good luck

Hello,

DO some research. Previously I had found a surgeon general's video saying that once you reach a certain weight, it is almost impossible to non-surgically lose it all healthily. The surgeon general recommends lap-band. My friend Janet lost 175 pounds through vigorous dieting and exercise and got egg-sized kidney stones and gained every pound back within the year. All you can do is educate them! Also, you will not be wearing a bikini one year later, lap-band is slow weight loss, and it's not a miracle cure. You have to have self restraint, and the will to exercise, and eat right, or you will gain weight. I am here for you if you need any support, I was just banded 4 days ago and am still sipping liquids. I have no desire to eat solids right now, and I find my pain is not very intense. You could say I have it easy, God is with me! He is with you, too, and I am here for your support!