Toughest dilemma in my life...

[ManningFan 10]

As the holidays approached I realized I didn't want to be overweight for the rest of my life. I am only 25 but it was time to do something. On 12/13 I began the process at a weight around 340lbs. Today I am 293.5 and my surgery date is scheduled for 2/2. Everyday I think about whether or not I actually need this. My mind never has been in the state it is now and the motivation I am feeling is beyond describable. I don't struggle with dieting and have incorporated it so well into my life that I don't even feel like I am missing anything. My insurance doesn't cover the surgery and its around 17k. I can afford it but it has become the principle. I feel so proud of the fact that I am almost 50lbs lighter and I've done it the old fashioned way (~1200 calories a day, minimal fat/organic/healthy). While I don't really care how it happens, I just want to get healthy. The only reason why I think I am going to go through with surgery is I have a past history of losing weight only to gain it back. There is something about me mentally that once I trim down I start to feel confident and my eating habits revert back to unhealthy ways. I think this surgery will be a daily reminder for the rest of my life. I think I need that, but I am not sure. What do you think? I know most people will say to get the surgery but I thought I'd ask anyway...

Regardless I am pretty pumped.

[nurseAMY11 0]

It's a very personal decision, unfortunately no one can tell you what to do. I have had many similar situaitons in the past though. I would do really great on a diet for a long time, start feeling better about myself, and then I would gain the weight back. I had the same thoughts about whether I really needed it or if I could do it on my own. I ultimately decided that I had "yo-yoed" too many times and that I needed a little help. But that's just me... you may be in that mindset to really stick to it by yourself and that's fantastic. Good luck to you, you'll figure out what the right choice is for you!

[mattie7632 24]

I am the same way....lose weight but the discipline, etc. doesn't last and I end up gaining it back! You should read more posts on here, I don't know that the band is that effective based on all the "dieting" the successful ones had to do and the ones that have gained it back or not lost at all--I'm only 4 weeks out so I don't have personal experience but before you shell out that 17k I would ask the doctor if any patients of his would be willing to discuss their long term results.

As the holidays approached I realized I didn't want to be overweight for the rest of my life. I am only 25 but it was time to do something. On 12/13 I began the process at a weight around 340lbs. Today I am 293.5 and my surgery date is scheduled for 2/2. Everyday I think about whether or not I actually need this. My mind never has been in the state it is now and the motivation I am feeling is beyond describable. I don't struggle with dieting and have incorporated it so well into my life that I don't even feel like I am missing anything. My insurance doesn't cover the surgery and its around 17k. I can afford it but it has become the principle. I feel so proud of the fact that I am almost 50lbs lighter and I've done it the old fashioned way (~1200 calories a day, minimal fat/organic/healthy). While I don't really care how it happens, I just want to get healthy. The only reason why I think I am going to go through with surgery is I have a past history of losing weight only to gain it back. There is something about me mentally that once I trim down I start to feel confident and my eating habits revert back to unhealthy ways. I think this surgery will be a daily reminder for the rest of my life. I think I need that, but I am not sure. What do you think? I know most people will say to get the surgery but I thought I'd ask anyway...

Regardless I am pretty pumped.

[mcastane 3]

It's a very personal decision, unfortunately no one can tell you what to do. I have had many similar situaitons in the past though. I would do really great on a diet for a long time, start feeling better about myself, and then I would gain the weight back. I had the same thoughts about whether I really needed it or if I could do it on my own. I ultimately decided that I had "yo-yoed" too many times and that I needed a little help. But that's just me... you may be in that mindset to really stick to it by yourself and that's fantastic. Good luck to you, you'll figure out what the right choice is for you!

I so agree with this one! Good luck! I personally don't regret it one bit!

[Stargurrl* 5]

I feel the same way the closer I get to surgery. And like Amy said it is a very personal decision....for me I keep going back to my facts. I have been successful on almost every diet I've ever tried....for two weeks or maybe a month or maybe even a few months, but I always gained back all the weight and thensome. I know the surgery is what I need to help me change my life. Good luck whatever you choose to do : )

Jamie

[happygirl65 5]

I think we all go through a phase where we wonder if we can do it on our own. And it sounds like you ARE...my goodness you ahve lost so much on your own...be proud of that! I think the surgery makes it more "real" that this is a way you have to eat forever because of the device. But so much of the time it's a matter of getting your mind around the fact that you are DONE with being fat. Sounds like you are on the right track no matter what choice you make about surgery. Stick with it...you are WORTH it!

[Spartan 4]

As the holidays approached I realized I didn't want to be overweight for the rest of my life. I am only 25 but it was time to do something. On 12/13 I began the process at a weight around 340lbs. Today I am 293.5 and my surgery date is scheduled for 2/2. Everyday I think about whether or not I actually need this. My mind never has been in the state it is now and the motivation I am feeling is beyond describable. I don't struggle with dieting and have incorporated it so well into my life that I don't even feel like I am missing anything. My insurance doesn't cover the surgery and its around 17k. I can afford it but it has become the principle. I feel so proud of the fact that I am almost 50lbs lighter and I've done it the old fashioned way (~1200 calories a day, minimal fat/organic/healthy). While I don't really care how it happens, I just want to get healthy. The only reason why I think I am going to go through with surgery is I have a past history of losing weight only to gain it back. There is something about me mentally that once I trim down I start to feel confident and my eating habits revert back to unhealthy ways. I think this surgery will be a daily reminder for the rest of my life. I think I need that, but I am not sure. What do you think? I know most people will say to get the surgery but I thought I'd ask anyway...

Regardless I am pretty pumped.

Hi, ManningFan....

First Question: Peyton or Eli....or Both?

You bring up a very interesting series of issues, and I'd like to offer my point of view….which might be a little different than others here.

First, congratulations on your achievement thus far. You've lost a very significant amount of weight, and you should be very proud of that. With or without the band, that is a wonderful accomplishment.

However, there are a number of things that come into play here. First, you have lost a lot of weight in a relatively short period of time. Dieting in a conventional manner, it would/should take you about 2 or three months to lose that much….UNLESS you were crash-dieting. I hope that is not the case. When you are as heavy as you were, and you have a "young metabolism", it IS possible to lose that much in the amount of time you have suggested….but, I am thinking that you may have been a bit extreme in your dieting, perhaps? That is NEVER a good idea, and ALWAYS leads you back to weight gain. I do not know that this is the case in your situation, but from the time period you have indicated, it is a possibility.

Another component of this is that you have your Surgery scheduled. That is almost ALWAYS a motivator that leads people to significant weight loss, because they know that the band is "waiting" for them a short distance down the road, and they won't have to diet quite like that forever. Thus the motivation is a bit artificial, and it is possible that you might not be able to maintain it without the surgery.

Now, having said all that, I will tell you something that I believe very strongly: The BEST Weight Loss Surgery is NO Weight Loss Surgery.

That means that if you can do it without surgery, you WILL be better off. No one should ever have surgery unless they really NEED it, for ANY reason.

You are in a unique position in that you are a self-pay. You don't have to worry about insurance, and you are very fortunate for a number of reasons. You can choose your surgeon, the hospital, the aftercare, etc. You aren't tied to what your insurance will pay for. You can also choose when to have your surgery. You have the CONTROL.

In my own process of rebuilding my body, I have been through a rather unique experience. I won't go into details about my "Banded life", but I will say that during a process that has lasted nearly a decade, I have learned an enormous amount, about my body, about my self, about the Medical industry, about Medical Science, and many other things. I have worked within the Medical Sciences field in that period, so I have the unique experience of having seen this process from virtually every angle, including that of a patient. And while this comment might raise a few eyebrows, I will tell you that if I knew prior to my surgery what I know NOW, I would never have had the surgery.

Now, I say that as I sit here at a PERFECT weight for my body type, having had a Lap Band, in excellent health, and one might rightfully ask me why I would say that. It's complicated, and I am NOT here to tell people NOT to have surgery, but to assist them in making the best choices for their health….and if that includes surgery, then I will say that. But….I have learned so much about Physiology, Nutrition, Psychology, (I had a background in those PRIOR to surgery, but my experience taught me things that were NEVER taught in school…) and the components of good health and vitality. I have realized that our culture and society has SO corrupted our concept of what is good nutrition and what good health actually means. As a result, I began thinking and eating and moving far differently than I did prior to this process, and I am quite convinced that had I been aware of these things earlier in my life, surgery would NOT have been the path I would have taken.

My suggestion to you would be this: You have TIME, and you have Money. You're only 25, and some Medical Professionals will tell you that the body really does not reach full physical maturation until 28 or even 30. I wouldn't say this to you if you were in your late 30's or 40's, or if you had only lost a few pounds, but you are YOUNG, and you have lost FIFTY POUNDS so far. I would call your Surgeon's office, and postpone your surgery for a few months, maybe 5 or 6 months. See how you do. If your weight loss continues, then postpone it again, until you reach a BMI where you HAVE to make a decision and then cancel, or have the surgery, depending on your experience. Take those 6 months, study nutrition (I will PM you some information on materials, if you like), develop an exercise program, and see if you can get control of this yourself. I think you can. You have demonstrated your ability to do so thus far.

Quite frequently on this forum, someone will spout out one of the numerous "statistics" that have been floating around about weight loss and related matters. One of the "Statistics" is "of people who Lose weight on their own, only %5 are able to keep it off". Most Fitness professionals (and that includes quite a range of professions) would disagree with that quite strenuously. Those people who do it CORRECTLY can very often keep the weight off, and develop TRUE health and vitality. Those "statistics" (where do they get that crap?) more often refers to the class of people whose idea of real "dieting" means reducing their intake of Snickers from Four bars a day to Two. That ain't gonna work. And, unfortunately, THAT is also one of the reasons that SO MANY people fail with the Lap Band….they simply reduce the amount of garbage they consume. But so often the problem is WHAT they eat, as well as the amount.

So, that is MY take on your situation. Because you are YOUNG enough, and you have lost so much of your excess weight on your own, I would give it a try. Some people might say that should not waste any more time and just get the Lap Band. I would strongly disagree with that, because you have NOT wasted ANY time. You have brought yourself several steps closer to Good Health, and if you continue along this path, you will complete the task.

But, again, I would caution you: Do NOT do this by crash dieting or by eating unhealthily. I will be happy to assist you with finding materials that will help you with this. But Do it the RIGHT way. Or you might become another statistic.

I heartily encourage surgery (including WLS) where it is NECESSARY. But, as I have said, you should never undergo surgery of any kind unless you really NEED it. And you might have a unique opportunity to avoid it.

And 17 grand can buy a LOT of bikinis......

If I can help you in any way, please feel free to PM me.

S.

[SuzanneCollins 0]

Hi there...

I know how you feel, as I have been very motivated at times and able to lose weight easily if I put forth the effort. But my problem wasn't losing the weight, it was keeping it off. And after years of losing 50 pounds only to gain 60 back, I really had lost hope and resolved myself to being what I was: fat.

I never thought I would have the means to get this surgery, but once I had insurance, I began pursuing it. In fact, I am in the hospital now recovering from my surgery. I'm nervous. I don't know if this will change my life as I hope it will. I just know that dieting didn't work in the long term and I needed something better. I needed a tool that would keep me physically and mentally in check in terms of what and how I eat for life. Yes, we probably could struggle with dieting constantly and keep moderately slim, but who is happy doing that? Not I. I view my Lap Band as a physical behavior modifier, something motivation alone can't offer.

So, can you lose the weight on your own? Absolutely. Will you gain it all back? Likely, but certainly not unavoidable. I just know that, in my case, I was never going to be forever thin on my own. If you can relate to those feelings, then I think you should pursue the surgery. And you can always give it another year or two before you decide and see how you're doing. It's a major decision and will require changing your eating habits forever; I am still daunted by it all...

Best wishes...

[~*~Rachel~*~ 2]

I approach this question like this. I am doing this on my own this is all me I may be having lap band but its not doing the work for me its only making the work more tolerable. I have surgery Jan 25th and to this date on my pre op diet alone I have lost twenty pounds. I have NEVER lost any amount of weight to make me even say hey I can do this until now. Now I know that I can not keep this up forever I know old habits are hard to break and I feel I need that extra reminder why I am doing this. Thankfully my insurance covers this procedure so I can understand why you are questioning it with the massive amount of money you are about to spend. My question for you is why after you would diet and loose weight would you gain it back? If its just habit then maybe the band will help you remember if not the financial part of it will. I can honestly say if this was not covered by my insurance there is absolutely no way I would be having it done. But I would be subjected to back and knee and neck surgery within the next two years and I am only 27. Now I pray that with the band it helps me remember or rather forget my old habits and form new ones but you also have to consider is the band going to be enough to break your habits? I've been told the band only works as much as you work it so therefore I pray I develop habits that work my band. Ultimately it is what you feel comfortable with. If you feel this is your time that you feel you can do it this time then Good for you!!! But have you ever felt that in the past? Have you ever thought this is your time and it wasn't? Just try not to waste anymore time this is your years where the decisions you make and the life you live will effect the rest of your life. I promise you I would be living a different life If I had done this earlier. Good luck in whatever you decide!

[mattie7632 24]

"I have realized that our culture and society has SO corrupted our concept of what is good nutrition and what good health actually means."

Yep--True. Consider healthcare, it's not HEALTHcare, it's SICKcare!

[amberakamom 13]

It's scary once surgery gets close! Losing weight is easy. Keeping it off is not. Which is why I am getting the band, to help me maintain.

Great job on the 50 pounds!!!

[ravendays 2]

Im scheduled to be banded the 30th. I have a couple times thought about my age, 28, and how long I have been over weight, how long I have put into losing weight, and if I think this is a NEED and not a want. Am an all or nothing type. If I diet, then I diet fully and keep myself honest, if I dont diet then I dont make excuses and just explain im not in the zone to diet. I havent done any fad diets. I tried WW and then on my own. I have a gym membership and I pull my records to see my track record. I answer only to myself while dieting...its seriously a zone thing.

Now my breaking point was I did lose 25 lbs, quit smoking for a year, put on 35 lbs (making me the largest I'd been after 3 pregnancies in my life), started smoking because I was depressed, lost 20 lbs, and while smoking I have put it back on. I'm a week out of surgery and Im done...I cant find the motivation to without help. I cant keep doing this the rest of my life. I need to be happy for me, my kids, my marriage, my career, and again for me. So no more smoking, no more yo-yo'ing around...no more excuses. I get the tool, and together (me and my tool) we get happy & healthy.

One of the things I've done...I wrote a 3 paged typed journal that is every thought I have in my head about my weight. What I see when I look in the mirror, the difficulties my weight gives me daily (shortness of breath, cant shave my legs easily, cant paint my toenails without an unusual amount of effort, etc) and what I think of myself and how that effects people around me. I then saved it put it away. Two days letter I got it out and read it to myself, out loud, and cried...a lot.

I cant say if you should get this done but I can say after I sat with myself and put my head on paper, weighted myself, gave myself a come to Jesus talk, and looked back on my efforts, and I made a call to schedule the purchase of what I hope will be my friend...Lapband.

[ManningFan 10]

Thanks for the replies. I don't have much time, will reply more later.

But I wanted to share this and see what people think.

Normal diet:

Bfast (weekends only)

3 egg whites on wheat bread or light wheat english muffin (sometimes with turkey)

Lunch:

6 in turkey on wheat subway mustard and veg only

Snack: piece of fruit or some turkey

Dinner:

chicken breast marinated in something

rice - white or brown

one veg (prolly 2-3 servings) like green Beans or corn or peas.

No calories via drinks.

Sometimes I replace a meal with a Protein shake/smoothie/fruit combo but rarely.

I think it comes in around 1000-1200 cal. Ive also been on phentermine. Weight is falling off and I feel great and have tons of energy.

And I don't know if it does anything (I have heard it does) but I put tobasco on everything, no calories and I heard spicy things make you burn more.

Peyton Manning btw.

[stateofzen 46]

Quite frequently on this forum, someone will spout out one of the numerous "statistics" that have been floating around about weight loss and related matters. One of the "Statistics" is "of people who Lose weight on their own, only %5 are able to keep it off". Most Fitness professionals (and that includes quite a range of professions) would disagree with that quite strenuously. Those people who do it CORRECTLY can very often keep the weight off, and develop TRUE health and vitality. Those "statistics" (where do they get that crap?) more often refers to the class of people whose idea of real "dieting" means reducing their intake of Snickers from Four bars a day to Two. That ain't gonna work. And, unfortunately, THAT is also one of the reasons that SO MANY people fail with the Lap Band….they simply reduce the amount of garbage they consume. But so often the problem is WHAT they eat, as well as the amount.

Spartan, I think your post is generally great, but the fact is, these statistics come from a number of meta-analytic studies that have been published in the top medical research journals like JAMA, and they most certainly ARE NOT made up of a sample of people who are eating two Snickers a day vs four. I've read them, so I'm not just spouting off what I've heard through the grapevine, either.

I'm a psychologist who has worked in a number of medical settings, and has participated in a number of medical school lectures on obesity-- where the physicians are teaching these statistics because they are supported in study after study after study, no matter the diet program (medically supervised, behavioral changes, medication, etc.).

Some people are able to change their ideas of food, fitness and health permanently and the OP may be one of them. I hope she is. But the numbers people quote in terms of those who successfully diet and maintain the weight loss 5 years out are sadly true given the preponderance of well-controlled scientific evidence.

[cheryl2586 3,053]

I think the biggest mistake one makes is thinking the band will help you keep the weight off because it wont. If you resort back to your old eating habits with the band you will gain all your weight back. Im just sayin. The band is not a guarantee that you will maintain your weight loss. Its a constant battle every single day.