Keep the "fat" comments coming.....

[Pamalamadingdong 0]

This is my dad's parents. My mother passed away in August 2010. She would always defend me to them and put them in their place. I think my dad doesn't know what to say or how to say it.

I'm sorry about your mom. I think your father was probably raised with that witches mouth. She's beyond rude, My husband grandmother was blunt, but she wasn't cruel. like this. She would say something like are you happy like that? If you said yes then she would say good, if not she would say don't bitch do. I'm glad you are using it as a positive and not letting it get you down.

[ElfiePoo 109]

It always amazes me that people feel it's ok to comment on another person's weight...and in a rude manner to boot. I think they do it because they know the 'fat' person is so humiliated at having their fatness pointed out that they won't fight back.

My family members haven't made rude comments about my weight in decades because at some point I stopped tolerating it. Whenever they'd make a rude comment, I'd just calmly ask them if they were intending to be as rude as they were coming across or were they just being insensitive. It really didn't take more than a couple times to get them to stop since it's hard to argue with the fact that they're being rude...and now they are the ones that come off looking bad.

I don't allow *anyone* to treat me disrespectfully and still say in my life. Life is too short to surround oneself with hateful people...even if they do call themselves 'family'.

.

[Dave_NW 92]

Others have already expressed how outrageous it is for them to say things like that to you. So maybe the next time one of them says something like that, look at them with a dreamy expression in your eye, and say, "Gosh, I have so many choices, now that I'm losing all this weight. I'm having a really hard time figuring out what I'll be wearing at your FUNERAL!"

Not nice, but hey - fair is fair. And they started it...

Dave, shaking his head...

[NYYnNYGFAN 0]

In the Asian culture...a woman's daughter is a reflection of her. My mom had a beautiful figure when she was young and it disturbed her to have a "chubby" daughter. As thought by making comments and giving little insults would propel me to lose weight. But in fact, it did the opposite...just made me prove that I still was beautiful even with some extra pounds. I was always very popular and never had any problems getting good-looking boyfriends which mystified my mom. She thought I was beautiful but always said..."you have such a pretty face...such a shame you are heavy". Even when I was looking at a bridal magazine and made a comment on a tightfitting dress...she quickly told me that I was too fat to wear that dress! All I said was that the beading was pretty...not that I was thinking I could wear it!

But I know that being from a different culture...she loved me but didn't know how to help me the right way when I was young and for years I sabbotaged myself to prove my personality outshined my weight. We had a long talk once I realized what I was doing to myself and she realized that her "helpful" comments all backfired. She was heartbroken but because of this...I became a strong, confident, happy woman. Because of this...I was happy with my life & comfortable with my body. Until my father's medical problems finally ended his life last Feb, I do not want diabeties or any of the health issues he had which is what lead me to getting the band on 11/8/10.

Comments can help you or break you down...you only have to prove something to yourself!

[nomorejellybelly 77]

Ok, so I have grandparents that have made comments about my weight for years. Each time I had one of my children, my grandfather would always ask, "Are you sure they didn't leave one in there?" He even said this when I lost a baby when I was 36 weeks pregnant.

For Christmas Eve, I had my dad and grandparents over for Breakfast. I was hot from cooking all of the food. So, I turned the fan on in my living room. My grandmother says, "Turn that fan off. Not everyone here has as much fat on them as you!"

Today, she calls to check on us since we have had a big snow storm here. She asked me how I was feeling and how much weight I have lost. I told her I didn't have a scale at home. She says, "Yeah, they wouldn't weigh someone of your size anyways." SERIOUSLY!!Needless to say, my grandmother probably weighs 250 lbs. So, it is not as if she has any room to speak this way to me.

All I can say is to keep the fat comments coming. I'm going to use her negativity as encouragement for my weight loss!!

Some people are just bitter. Hang in there. Sounds like you are. I'm sorry to hear that you lost a baby. I'm sure that was very tough. Good luck to you.

[Mewizza 3]

I know exactly how you feel but mine are my parents & lil brother.. My brother calls me NoPantsFitsYouLady because of 1 time at the mall I started crying because none of the jeans I tired on would fit. My parents always say your so pretty but you'd be prettier if you could just lose the weight.. or my dad grabs on to my arm fat... It's hard & they all support me on my weight loss but I'll be glad when they don't have anything to say about it

[TracyNYC 4]

I am sorry you have to deal with this. I agree that in a clam time, you should call them both on their comments and even your dad about his not standing up for you.

You have a great attitude and are doing well. Hang in there.

[honk 780]

Mewizza, how old is your brother? If he is above 8 the next time he does that you need to retaliate. Childish yes. Needs to happen yes. He knows he's hurting you but does it anyway. Pick the most humiliating thing you can think of and shove a sharp stick in there. The more humiliating the better. Sounds like this is his own personal joke. You need to tell him the party's over. If he complains explain the whole turn about is fair play thing.

[disneymom1978 1]

Ok, so I have grandparents that have made comments about my weight for years. Each time I had one of my children, my grandfather would always ask, "Are you sure they didn't leave one in there?" He even said this when I lost a baby when I was 36 weeks pregnant.

For Christmas Eve, I had my dad and grandparents over for Breakfast. I was hot from cooking all of the food. So, I turned the fan on in my living room. My grandmother says, "Turn that fan off. Not everyone here has as much fat on them as you!"

Today, she calls to check on us since we have had a big snow storm here. She asked me how I was feeling and how much weight I have lost. I told her I didn't have a scale at home. She says, "Yeah, they wouldn't weigh someone of your size anyways." SERIOUSLY!!Needless to say, my grandmother probably weighs 250 lbs. So, it is not as if she has any room to speak this way to me.

All I can say is to keep the fat comments coming. I'm going to use her negativity as encouragement for my weight loss!!

My Grandmother is the same way. She'll invite my family for dinner and when we arrive she'll say "how are you doing? It looks like you've gained some weight." she says this almost everytime, even if I've been losing weight. Recently, I started to confront her. When she makes her comments I respond with "wow gram, that really hurts my feelings. You shouldn't say things like that to your grandchildren." This usually stops her in her tracks. Also, my gram is not a very lovey dovey person. I dont remember her telling us grandkids she loved us as children, although i know she does love us. I've been making a point to tell her that i love her and encourage the other grandkids to do the same. She's not just negative with me, it's all of the grandkids, just with different things. I'm hoping that this will help her to be more positive with the others as well. So far, so good!