pre-op emotions

[bowe6061 0]

hello everyone. this is my first time participating in the forum and i am doing it because i am scheduled to be banded jan 7 and i am experiencing some interesting emotions and thoughts. i would love to hear your feedback. the first thing i feel is almost ashamed or embarrassed. i keep thinking, "why can't you just eat healthy, exercise and lose the weight?" especially since i have lost weight before doing that exact thing. however, some of the weight has crept back on. on the other hand, i feel excited like i am going to get my life back. i have gained 30 lbs within the last year, and as a result i have lost a lot of my self-esteem and i find myself avoiding social situations. i am also terrified that it won't work and that i will remain fat. basically i feel that i have so much riding on this and that my hopes will be shattered.

[Stephy5 33]

hello everyone. this is my first time participating in the forum and i am doing it because i am scheduled to be banded jan 7 and i am experiencing some interesting emotions and thoughts. i would love to hear your feedback. the first thing i feel is almost ashamed or embarrassed. i keep thinking, "why can't you just eat healthy, exercise and lose the weight?" especially since i have lost weight before doing that exact thing. however, some of the weight has crept back on. on the other hand, i feel excited like i am going to get my life back. i have gained 30 lbs within the last year, and as a result i have lost a lot of my self-esteem and i find myself avoiding social situations. i am also terrified that it won't work and that i will remain fat. basically i feel that i have so much riding on this and that my hopes will be shattered.

Hi there and congrats!!! I am being banded on the 19 of Jan. There are many emotions. I am feeling guilty to do something for myself and pay for my part of it. I feel like it is taking away from my kids.... In reality I know it is not taking away at all. It is keeping me around longer.

As for you feeling embarrased etc. I am sorry you feel that way and I get it. First as many on here have said they are not telling anyone but those close to them. I myself don't mind telling people. When I got information from my doctor on this procedure I was told that this procedure especially is for people who can lose weight just have a hard time keeping it off. It is a tool. It isn't like you are going to just sit in front of the tv all day eating nachos and pizza and it is just gonna fall of. You will have to work hard. In turn it will make you feel so proud of yourseld for accomplishing this for yourself.

I know these emotions come in waves. Some days we will feel strong and others we will feel weak, but you are doing such a great thing for yourself and you will do a great job!!! Hold your head high and be so proud of the step you are taking for your self esteem and your health!!!

Congrats and good luck!

[HeatherinCA 10]

I felt the same way, I'd like to lose it normally but I know I can't. I've gained and lost the same 50 pounds probably 10 times since I was a kid. I can't lose 150 pounds on my own. I don't have enough will power to do that or enough hours in the day to do that much exercise, I need some assistance. I feel like the band is built in will power. I go out to eat, and I'm a little sad I can't eat what I always want, but since I physically can't eat it, I won't!! Then I'm ok, and I'm full on what it is I can eat. Before I would of ate it anyway and justified it in my mind. If my family wants to eat their 2,000 calorie meal they can go ahead, but I feel full and happy and healthy with my small portion of food I can eat. I'm starting to realize I don't need most of the food I was eating.

I was scared too, I tried to convince myself that I shouldn't do it. But I did it. I'm feeling good now, I don't have a fill yet, but I think i can handle it. I'm sure I'll feel a million times better when I lose a lot of weight, and can do normal things like sit comfortably in a movie theatre or an airplane, and do things and not be tired all the time, and shop at a normal clothing store.

[shadst8 8]

Your emotions are okay. You will run through so many--doubt, shame, depression as you "break up" with food. I felt ashamed until I thought of obesity as a disease. If were terminally ill or really sick and they tell me they had a procedure, test or tool that could help save my life, I would not hesitate to do it. Well, I realized that getting this band was a tool to save my life and have nothing to feel bad about trying preserve my health. Also, food was an addiction and I thought you do not look at an alcoholic and say--just stop? If it was that easy, AA would not even exist.

Reading this site will help you work through the emotion swings because so many went through the same thing, I felt so much better. You are doing the right thing and we are not lazy or taking the easy way out--everyone will tell you there is not ONE thing easy about what we do to work our band. I am so proud to be a bandster now because we are some of the most courageous people I know.

[sgipson04 0]

WoW, I am feeling same way as well i get banded in a few days here an while on this liquid diet i got to missing the so called awesome foods i enjoy, all awhile beating my self down cause im now on liquid diet an cant eat.ike others have said shine bright hold head high , these what seem to be tough days DONT LAST ALWAYS, GOD s word taught me that an its true , lol but you will make it an so will I . this time next year we will both look back an say wow we made it an yhea it was for the best , hold on dont give in <<< at least thats what I KEEP SAYING TO MYSELF ...

i HOPE MY WORDS HELPED U A LIL

i know it works for me

Thanks

Sgipson

[susansb 0]

I felt the same way!!! Don't beat yourself up. More important is you are doing something to address it. Check out my blog at https://diaryofalapbandmom.blogspot.com

[gotmyeyeontheprize 2]

Congratulations on your surgery date! You are perfectly normal for having these doubts and overwhelming emotions. I was banded on 11/22 and will have my first fill on the day of your surgery. Being banded was the best thing I have ever done for myself.

Like you, I blamed myself for being "fat" and felt ashamed that I did not have enough self control to prevent myself from being so overweight. In my opinion, the biggest step in this entire journey is admitting that you need the surgery. Now, just look towards the end result. I've lost 38 lbs. already and have so much more energy and feel much better about myself.

You may also experience some anxiety after surgery. Two days after my surgery, I had a mini panic attack! I kept asking myself what had I done to my body? Why did I put some foreign object in my body? Then, I reminded myself that I would 6 feet under and leaving my two children and husband behind if I didn't get control of my weight related health problems.

Be strong and know that you aren't alone in this journey. There are wonderful people on this forum that will guide you. Best of luck to you and your new life!

[serendipitybaby 0]

hello everyone. this is my first time participating in the forum and i am doing it because i am scheduled to be banded jan 7 and i am experiencing some interesting emotions and thoughts. i would love to hear your feedback. the first thing i feel is almost ashamed or embarrassed. i keep thinking, "why can't you just eat healthy, exercise and lose the weight?" especially since i have lost weight before doing that exact thing. however, some of the weight has crept back on. on the other hand, i feel excited like i am going to get my life back. i have gained 30 lbs within the last year, and as a result i have lost a lot of my self-esteem and i find myself avoiding social situations. i am also terrified that it won't work and that i will remain fat. basically i feel that i have so much riding on this and that my hopes will be shattered.

My first time on this forum tonight. I was moved up to an earlier surgery or I would have been banded Jan. 4. I really had no time to "grieve", I know this sounds funny, but I had crazy emotions about everything. Guilt for the cost (insurance covered most), not being able to enjoy Christmas dinner (lived through it just fine), and the loss of knowing there are certain foods that will no longer be in my life. I weighed 266 last week, down to 257, still on liquid and realize that this will be a slow process. I'm like you, I want my life back that I used to have. I have the same fears, but I know we just have to follow the diet precisely and look at the big picture. I think more than anything I need support too. I just ordered a pizza for my family two hours ago. I can't go upstairs so this is why I'm here. I'm not ready to watch others eat now. Have faith in yourself, I will try to do the same.