Ugg my husband Ugg...

[zeniada 9]

I was talking to my husband tonight about how my band is too tight and I think I will need an unfill when he started comparing me to others who have lost weight with the lap band. He said that the "people he has talked to" have lost amazing amounts of weight with the lap band. I said to him sure but they were banded 1-2 years ago, they didn't lose all their weight in a matter of 3 months. He just kept comparing my weight loss which has been 23lbs in 3 1/2 mos, saying I must not be doing things right and I must be cheating.

I AM TOO TIGHT RIGHT NOW!!! I can't eat any solids with out them coming back up all I can do is drink! I was soooooo mad at him for even daring to compare me to the 2 people he has found that have had the lap band. He didn't do any research before I got my surgery and still hasn't but will take it to the bank on what 2 other peoples results were.

UUUGGGG...I feel so defeated right now! I can't eat, I PB every time I try, or slime till I puke. All I can do is drink Protein shakes or drink pureed Soup and I can't get an unfill until 18th! UUUUGGGG on top of that I will need to go to Mexico for my unfill but wont have anyone to go with me (hubby will be out of town) so I probably wont even get to have an unfill until JANUARY! Don't know if I can live this way much longer getting really tired of Carnation instant Breakfast (or other Protein drinks) and soup!

THANKS FOR LETTING ME VENT

[RandomRan 1]

I was talking to my husband tonight about how my band is too tight and I think I will need an unfill when he started comparing me to others who have lost weight with the lap band. He said that the "people he has talked to" have lost amazing amounts of weight with the lap band. I said to him sure but they were banded 1-2 years ago, they didn't lose all their weight in a matter of 3 months. He just kept comparing my weight loss which has been 23lbs in 3 1/2 mos, saying I must not be doing things right and I must be cheating.

I AM TOO TIGHT RIGHT NOW!!! I can't eat any solids with out them coming back up all I can do is drink! I was soooooo mad at him for even daring to compare me to the 2 people he has found that have had the lap band. He didn't do any research before I got my surgery and still hasn't but will take it to the bank on what 2 other peoples results were.

UUUGGGG...I feel so defeated right now! I can't eat, I PB every time I try, or slime till I puke. All I can do is drink Protein shakes or drink pureed Soup and I can't get an unfill until 18th! UUUUGGGG on top of that I will need to go to Mexico for my unfill but wont have anyone to go with me (hubby will be out of town) so I probably wont even get to have an unfill until JANUARY! Don't know if I can live this way much longer getting really tired of Carnation instant Breakfast (or other Protein drinks) and soup!

THANKS FOR LETTING ME VENT

For the two people your husband has found, I can give him 4 I have met recently who are having less success. Hang in there. It's not good for you to be too tight that long. Where in MX do you need to go? If San Yesidro is your border crossing, I'll make arrangements to drive down there this month and go across with you if you need me to. My email is randomran@aol.com. Let me know if you need help.

PS. 23 lbs in 3 mo is awesome.

[Fluffy_Gurl 3]

Just remember that we each have our own journey. You know this, he may not. My explanation, boys are dumb. lol My BF/Fiance is being a total jackass right now. He thinks that e lose the same as bypass. He hasnt done any research either and when i took my guide to his house so he could read t he acted like it was a huge imposition and wouldnt read it.

i am so sorry that you cant eat. That totally sucks! Do you have a fill clinic near you that would do an unfill? It may be worth trying to find one for cases like these. Keep getting in your protien through the shakes and whatever else you can do. I kno this cant be easy. I myself have been struggling so i have a lot of sympathy for you. Good luck!

[7Grijalva7 1]

Wow! I went through that this morning but with my mom! Lol I called my husband later to tell him about her comments and that made him mad. Haha only my story is I DO FEEL I can eat almost anything but I don't and my weight loss hasn't really been to successful in my eyes. I know I've read a thousand times we can't compare each others weight loss...so all in time it will happen I guess! All we can do is try our best. Oh and Randomran u r such a good person for eanting to be there for support! Thumbs up to that! Well I wish u guys lots of luck!

[ElfiePoo 109]

Whenever my husband does or says something really stupid, I just remind him that when he falls asleep that night, there's no guarantee that he'll wake up in the morning.

As someone already said...for every person who's successful from day 1, there are many more who take longer. It's taken me almost a year post surgery to finally get it all figured out and I don't have the added difficulty of going to Mexico for fills and unfills. At this point I'm 13 months post surgery and have only lost 43 pounds...about 13 of that in the last 4-5 weeks after no loss and/or major rollercoasting for 6-7 months. According to my surgeon, this is more the norm. That's why people who get the sleeve lose more the first year...but by the end of the second year, band people have caught up to them.

Zen, sorry you're doing the whole sliming thing.

.

[gotmyeyeontheprize 2]

Bless your heart. I am almost 3 weeks out and experienced a very uncomfortable situation with my husband last week. We were eating dinner at my grandmother's house. She had made meatloaf, mashed potatoes, green Beans, carrots, mac-n-cheese, and rolls. My husband and kids do not eat meatloaf, but I usually do. She had made it with ground beef. So, I decided I would eat a piece of the fried chicken she had bought. I ate a thigh and pulled all of the skin off before eating it. Then, I ate a few bites of green Beans.

My hubby was watching every bite I took and was commenting on every bite I took. He would tell me I was eating to fast, or that I was eating too much. Then, he told me I didn't need the green beans. My dad had to tell him to shut up and leave me alone! My hubby continued to talk to my dad about my past eating habits and how my new eating habits should be. He did all of this as if I wasn't even sitting there. Finally, I just got up, grabbed my keys and cell phone, and I drove right on home crying all the way. I was so angry that crying was all I could do. Oh, and that little episode made me realize that stress causes the band to tighten!! I was miserable for about an hour.

Our husbands can be complete jack a**es when they want to be! As I told my husband, he has no idea what it took for me to step up and get banded. He has no idea what it feels like to finally admit to the world that you have no self control when it comes to food. He has no idea the emotional and physical stress this decision puts upon you. Needless to say, he was extremely quick to appologize and hasn't even mentioned food since!

[sparkplug 106]

I was talking to my husband tonight about how my band is too tight and I think I will need an unfill when he started comparing me to others who have lost weight with the lap band. He said that the "people he has talked to" have lost amazing amounts of weight with the lap band. I said to him sure but they were banded 1-2 years ago, they didn't lose all their weight in a matter of 3 months. He just kept comparing my weight loss which has been 23lbs in 3 1/2 mos, saying I must not be doing things right and I must be cheating.

I AM TOO TIGHT RIGHT NOW!!! I can't eat any solids with out them coming back up all I can do is drink! I was soooooo mad at him for even daring to compare me to the 2 people he has found that have had the lap band. He didn't do any research before I got my surgery and still hasn't but will take it to the bank on what 2 other peoples results were.

UUUGGGG...I feel so defeated right now! I can't eat, I PB every time I try, or slime till I puke. All I can do is drink Protein shakes or drink pureed Soup and I can't get an unfill until 18th! UUUUGGGG on top of that I will need to go to Mexico for my unfill but wont have anyone to go with me (hubby will be out of town) so I probably wont even get to have an unfill until JANUARY! Don't know if I can live this way much longer getting really tired of Carnation instant Breakfast (or other Protein drinks) and soup!

THANKS FOR LETTING ME VENT

I am so sorry that your husband is not as supportive as mine has been and still is. My husband has been absolutely fantastic in encouraging me especially when I hit plateaus along the way, which I hit many. You are doing fantastic and do not let his remarks stop you from moving forward with this. You don't think he is starting to get jealous of you losing weight already, do you? He might be getting nervous he is going to lose a wonderful beautiful woman like you when you get all your weight off. My husband is so proud of me after 2 years and losing 90 pds with no fills that he tells everybody how wonderful I am and look. Do not let your husband get you down or make you think you are not doing well. I was a slow loser from day one, you will make it I am sure. Good luck and keep happy.

[spoiltmom 44]

Most men seem to think the band is easy b/c they have seen 1 or 2 people lose massive amounts of weight with it.

My dh keeps telling me this will work for you, it has to b/c look at the results our friends have had from it. He thinks this should be an easy deal and I should get to goal with no problem. I haven't lost any weight in the past month, in fact I gained a few pounds back:( My dh thinks that's crazy.

He makes me crazy at times and I feel like he's judging me and I'm scared of failing b/c I know he won't approve.

[honk 780]

I am not quite 4 months out. I am very strick about what I eat and do an hour of cardio a day and have lost 23 pounds as well. Every person is different in how they loose and gain weight. I think I am a slow loser because 1)I am still not at perfect restriction; 2) I had lost 80 pounds presurgery. From what I've read on this site I think people who went from their regular eating style and no exercise to starting the presurgery liquid diet and adding exercise lose a lot at the very begining. I think my body said "hey we know what your doing; and we'll cooperate at our own pace!"

[Melissannde 41]

Zenaida,

I'm so sorry you're having hubby issues. Men are indeed stupid sometimes. Maybe it's testosterone poisoning, I dunno.

Have you tried drinking something warm to help ease the band a little? I do that in the morning when I'm a little tight.

I understand where you are, I was too tight back in the spring and fought with it almost a month before I got unfilled. Hope you can get unfilled sooner than the 18th.

[juliansmom2003 3]

God, men can really be sooo difficult sometimes. My husband fought me tooth and nail NOT to have the surgery!!! In all the research I did about fills and stuff, a good reason for weight loss to stop is also being too tight, so perhaps that is a reason you may experience a slow in loss, but 23 lbs in 3 months is just freaking awesome!! Next time, shove a big piece of meatloaf in his mouth and tell him you've got this :-)!

[L12 13]

I lost less than 30 lbs. in the first six months after banding; it took quite a while to get to my sweet spot. Now (after TWO YEARS on 12/31) nearly half of the old me is gone! Usually I get aggravated by the newbies who want immediate results from the band, now it's your husband bugging me, LOL! It will happen eventually, and it would be MUCH better for your relationship (both now and once you've reached goal) if he would give it a rest and let the band work correctly--even if that means a slight unfill for you. I just about DARE him to come on our forums and complain; I think he would get an earful and an education!

[samomom 19]

Why won't you go to TJ by yourself? You really need to get unfilled. I posted to you last week about what happened to me. My doctor was mad that I let it go for just 4 days. Don't risk your health. The more you throw up the more chance to risk of band slippage.

[zeniada 9]

Why won't you go to TJ by yourself? You really need to get unfilled. I posted to you last week about what happened to me. My doctor was mad that I let it go for just 4 days. Don't risk your health. The more you throw up the more chance to risk of band slippage.

You brought up a very good question as to why I couldn't go by my self...I have never been there by myself and am afraid I would get lost. If you have ever driven In TJ you would remember how difficult it can be and they have these crazy round about things you have to drive around and it's SCARY....but if worse comes to worse I will go by myself....

[msdeevee 0]

For the two people your husband has found, I can give him 4 I have met recently who are having less success. Hang in there. It's not good for you to be too tight that long. Where in MX do you need to go? If San Yesidro is your border crossing, I'll make arrangements to drive down there this month and go across with you if you need me to. My email is randomran@aol.com. Let me know if you need help.

PS. 23 lbs in 3 mo is awesome.

WOW!!! this is so incredibly generous!! there are still some good people in the world.

If there's anyway you can take this offer please do. You sound like you need to find a good support system.

Take this opportunity to stand on your own two feet and to show your DH and most importantly yourself that you can make this journey with flying colors .

I wish you the very best.

Dee