Do I tell or do I keep it a secret???

[Pinkygirl 34]

I wouldn't tell my lunch buddies or boss. Just tell them that you are trying to lose weight and you are doing a liquid diet to kick start your diet. Which is really not a lie because the liquid diet helps cleanse our liver and gets it ready to filter out the fat more efficiently.

Slpcat,

Congrats on losing 50 pounds! I can't wait to lose 50 pounds! That is what I was thinking on tellling them before the surgery and then after the surgery im hoping ill be able to eat alil more than just nibbles. How long did it take you to eat a meal after surgery, if you dont mind me asking?

[honk 780]

Check with your doctor about food progression post op. Mine was as follows: Clear Liquids one week (broth, and Protein shakes), 1 week full liquid (tomato, low fat cream chicken soup), 1 week "mushies" (shredded chicken/tuna, mashed sweet potato, cottage cheese, ricotta cheese), Then moved to solids.

[HappyMom 1]

I chose not to tell anyone about my surgery except my husband, of course.

I read so many stories on this website about people who really regret talking about their surgery. They had to deal with never ending opinions and criticism from their family and friends. Maybe I just don't give my friends and family that much credit....at the time of my surgery I didn't want to spend my energy explaining and defending my decision.

On the other hand, telling people will provide you a greater support system. Sometimes I think that it would be wonderful just to chat with my mom or friends about what I am going through. Even if I could talk to them about this process, they really wouldn't understand since they have never been through it themselves. I have started attending support group meetings at our hospital for Lapband patients and I have all of you guys.

No one has even suspected that I had WLS. I still eat what I used to before, but just smaller amounts. My friends see me out walking every day so they really aren't surprised at me losing weight.

I may chose to tell everyone at some point. Maybe when I have reached goal. I am still not sure.

Please remember.....once you tell even just one person (friend or family), PLEASE expect that they will talk to someone else about it, and so on. You can't UNtell!

Good luck to you!

[BetsyB 9]

I didn't really make any grand announcements. I told my sisters, and my immediate family (husband, kids) obviously knew....but otherwise, I've only told people if it's sort of naturally come up.

I don't keep it a secret, because someone who was banded shared with me, and the information helped me when I was in the decision-making process.

I just figure that it's like other personal information--most people simply don't have a need to know. (I wear a Medic-Alert for those who do need to know.)

[slpcat 0]

Slpcat,

Congrats on losing 50 pounds! I can't wait to lose 50 pounds! That is what I was thinking on tellling them before the surgery and then after the surgery im hoping ill be able to eat alil more than just nibbles. How long did it take you to eat a meal after surgery, if you dont mind me asking?

Well.. my doctor had me on liquids for 2 weeks after surgery :smile2: so ... when I first started eating a meal, I couldn 't eat much bc my stomach was getting used to eating again. But after a week of eating, I could eat anything I wanted and no restriction at all! It took me a LONG TIME to feel restriction. I hav a 10cc band and i now have 8cc in it and I can still eat 2/3 of my plate.

One thing the band did right away though for me was cut down on my cravings. I was banded about 14 months ago and I am happy with my weightloss thus far but I could eat normal for 6 months or so after my band and I knew if I had told everybody and their mama, it would be hard to explain why I could still eat normally.

[ebeeze824 1]

Im asking myself the same question! My immediate family knows and fiance. I want to keep it a secret from my friends because I want to surprise them and have them wonder lol Also, I see them a couple times a month due to work and school and just busy schedule so it will just seem like I have been trying to lose weight and time has passed by.

But my quetion is what do I tell my co-workers and boss? I gave my boss a heads up for Dec or Jan I will be taking a couple days off but im not sure when until insurance approves and I set the date. She keeps asking me silly questions like are you getting a nose job, boob job, stomach stappled, hair implants, botax, sex change I just told her she will see after a couple of months. Now what about the co-workers I eat lunch with? They will see that I will be on a liquid diet for the 2 weeks before surgery and couple weeks after. What do I tell them now?:smile2:

You dont have to tell them anything just say you can't make it to lunch today if you dont want them in your business

[mom1980s 0]

I had surgery back in June. I wish I would have only told close family...because everyone is "expecting" to see how much weight I'm loosing. Plus, you always have those people who are "frenemies" that you have to watch out for. Ahh well!

i know what your saying i shouldnt have blabbed about my surgery now everyones going to expect things to go fast:mad:

[nearly40momma 0]

I am telling only my parents, husband and eldest child. The other 2 are too young anyway. i have to have my gallbladder out at the same time so that will be what everyone else thinks I am in the hospital for. My inlaws have never had any weight struggles and I have heard them say nasty things about overwieght people. I think it is just better for them to think I finally found a diet I can be succesful on and leave it at that.

I struggled with telling my eldest the most. I know he has seen me try every diet plan on the cover of US Weekly,LOL! But I didnt want him to judge me and think of me a weak. Plus theres that whole thing about admitting that you finally are really THAT fat and not just a few pounds overweight. YIkes!

[love.star 1]

Wow, Ive been feeling the same thing. Wondering who I should tell in my life. But Ive only told two ppl (not including my husband) which are my mother and one sister.

I decided to tell the people I talk to on a daily basis that I have a close intimate relationship with them. They are very supportive and non-judgemental. They are very understanding. Ive decided to hold off on telling my dad and my other older sister until aft the surgery, at a muchh later date. I dont want to hear any negativity and opinions from them or anyone else.

Bc I know once I tell one friend, then theyll tell another and so on. Once I tell them, they will always know and always remember. And quite frankly, I dont think I owe ppl an explination. Which is what I know ppl will looking for, especially for those who dont approve.

So for now anyway, Im just planning to tell ppl Ive been dieting and exercising, which is true!! :biggrin:

[Boo_68 6]

I was just venting on this issue...for me there are definete people I would chose not to tell. They are uneducated about the whole process and see Lapband as a crutch not a tool. They have this preconditioned notion that the weight just "falls" off because of the Lapband. Its alot of hard work and you deserve credit for all the milestones you cross along the way! I say chose wisely who let into your "choice" to make a change in your life. I honestly wish that the only people who knew were my husband and my children...they truely have backed me 200% and know how hard I've worked to get to where I am today...and it was far from easy. The toughest choices I've ever had to make in my entire life.

Good lucky on your journey to a new you...and make the best decision for "you".:biggrin:

[Sapphire25 0]

From my own personal experience with natural weightloss, I had too many "well meaning"

friends who were cheering me on and asking way too many personal questions. I am not one

who likes a lot of attention. So now that I have chosen to do lap band, I am choosing to

tell as few people as possible. My family and a few close friends that I trust.

My health has gotten so much worse and I am finding it harder to lose the weight that I have

decided that I need the extra help. I am at the beginning of the process. I have my

consultation appointment with the surgeon Oct. 22.

Amy

[L12 13]

Not long ago I would have been on the side of "don't tell," and I told no one but husband and family at first; then eventually I let loose and told people once I made it past Onederland. But now, I don't know. I've lost so much weight that coworkers are being very nosy and borderline rude about my eating habits and weight loss, and making it very clear that they are worried I'm anorexic (that started when I was still at an overweight BMI) :smile::rolleyes2::yesnod:. If I hadn't told them I had weight loss surgery, I'm pretty sure they would have attempted an intervention or something :sneaky:.

[moggy 0]

I don't have a problem with telling people, my biggest issue is telling my mother.

I know she doesnt really like the idea of WLS - I heard all about it when my cousin considered it.

My biggest problem is I am booked in two weeks and I havent even told her I am having surgery. She was there for me last time I had major surgery so really feel like I should tell her (she was with me as they wheeled me in), but also don't want to stress her - my dad died two weeks ago and surgery is exactly one month to the day. My parents were divorced but it still has hit her hard and she did help look after him.

:smile:

[Fluffy_Gurl 3]

I wish I hadnt told already. I really didnt want everyone n my buisness. unfortunatly one of my family members didnt "understand" that I wasnt really telling people and has blabbed to my entire family. I just decided i really dont give a crap about what they Think. the rest of my family is all tall and very thin and im wider than i am tall. I wish i wouldnt have told, unfortunatly i had to tell someone..cuz i need a ride to the hospital wich is an hour and a half away.

[MerreyMac 0]

I can relate to the issue about wishing you hadn't told a soul. Unfortunately for me, due to my work enviroment and hours, when calling around to get information during my lunch hour ( I dont leave the office for lunch) some co-workers overheard and now they know. :smile2:

On the fortunate side my family and friends do not interact with my co-workers so its like Im in two differnt worlds. My husband knows and my best friend knows. I told my best friend because she is such a worrier, and she will be the one who reminds me to ask this question and that question. I have not told my mother because she is of the mind that I should be strong enough to loose weight without help and I can not deal with the negativity she will heap on me when the weight doesnt come off as fast as she thinks it should.

I would say that you need to assess the people in your life, judge if they will be a positive influence or a negative one, and from that decide who, if any, you tell, but be prepared for people you dont want to know finding out no matter how hard you try to be quiet. Roll with the punches. And remember, you can always re-assess and tell more people later. Just make sure you explain that the band isnt doing this for you, but rather a helping hand and therefore the weight is not going to disappear overnight, which is the healthiest way to loose it.