Loosing weight and also loosing friends

[missgypsy 1]

I know this was touched on in another thread but it's really been kinda bugging me. As I loose weight and I am more confident with myself, I look better and I am more outgoing then I used to be. Usually I am kinda quite and shy UNTIL I get to know you lol. Then it's different. I feel like I am loosing friends as I travel this journey in my life. They treat me differently then they used to. Kinda irks me in a sense. I'm the same person I was just not as big. The emails have stopped, texts, emails, and phone calls. No this isn't my imigination...there was even a marriage/courthouse wedding I wasn't told about either. I found out on Facebook. I'm like WTH ppl. I didn't think friendships were to be like that. So what gives? On the flip side I almost know whats happening here. I see my gf's hubby's at work because they work with my hubby. I have been told alot lately how good I am looking. I wonder if they are going home and saying something to them and jealousy perhaps playing a part in this? Some women are like that...they feel inferior to other woman that tend to look better then they do. Am I way off? lol I am just trying to rationalize this and it's not making any sense to me at all. So any advice?

[kelsey94568 0]

I have a friend kind of like that. As I lose weight, she asks me what I weigh, and she always says she's like 5 pounds less than me although she looks exactly the same. I blow it off as a sign of insecurity about her own self image.

Edited September 12, 2010 by kelsey94568

[msdv 5]

I say this in almost every thread about this "friend" thing.

It's unfortunate but people like to put others in categories in relation to themselves. You may have been the good and faithful but "fat" friend so it made those who were smaller than you very comfortable with you as in you were no threat to them .

When we start to take charge of our health and lose the weight they are no longer comfy with how they feel about themselves and see you as a threat.

I'm only down a few lbs from before surgery and I have a long way to go but some so called "friends " have already told me "OMG, I have to lose weight !!! I can't let you get to be smaller than me"

One I thought close friend that I confided in told her DH and he told someone else that I really didn't want to share the info with and it's already caused a rift between us. So I see that I will be doing this basically on my own with only the support of a couple of people .

There will also be some "friends" that will set themselves up in competition with me which will be totally 1 sided.

It's really a shame but keep on doing what you're doing. If someone stops associating with you because your getting healthier are they really your friend?

I'm going to make myself so busy with planning my meals and exercising that I will not have much time for fake friends and their issues anyway.

[ElfiePoo 109]

My .02 and not meant to offend but sounds like they weren't really friends, they just liked having you around as the 'fat' friend. Now that you aren't, your usefulness has ended. Move on...no loss. Make new friends.

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[missgypsy 1]

i agree 110% with all of you!! why should they drag me down to there level? i'm better then they are and i don't "need" people in my life that are going to treat me like that. i deserve more then that! if they can't like me for who i am and what i've done then they can go fly a kite.

[amandac82 0]

missgypsy~

First, I'd like to say "Hey neighbor" I am only 45 minutes away from you, in Wichita Falls.

Ok, to your topic. I had the same thing happen. Let them go. I am starting to figure out that women from around here are jealous and ugly acting. I'm fine with my family and husband and my "real friends". You just keep losing that weight and forget them!

[btorres0698 0]

If a person stops being your friend because your loosing weight they are not your friend anyway. A true friend will be there for you when your fat and when your skinny. Continue to lose weight and remember while your dropping pounds you will be dropping people also. In the end, the people who are your real friends will be the people left in your life.