My band slams shut!!!!

[BusyMom1961 1]

I have a 15 year old son - and all that entails -

We have heated talks about what he is and isn't going to do. I am a parent who believes that at 15 you still don't get to tell me what you are going to do and when you are going to be home - needless to say we argue about boundaries.

And this generally happens around meal time. When he and I argue or talk excitedly my band slams shut and nothing is going to go down it for quite a while.

Does anyone else have this reaction from stress?

I try to stay stress free during meal times, but some days it isn't easy. And today was one of them.

I don't think that I will be able to eat anything else today and I will be lucky if I can drink anything. Yuck, what a way to end the weekend.

[Llyra 3]

For what it is worth, you have my deepest sympathy. My son will be 21 on Tuesday and has a couple of children of his own. I wasn't sure either of us would survive his fifteenth year, though.

I've not noticed my own band ever slamming shut, but it seems like a fairly logical reaction to stress, related to having one's stomach twist in knots. Frankly, I'd be grateful for this reaction as opposed to the rection I used to have, which was to eat everything in sight while under stress.

Hang in there, Mom. Many of us have survived that fifteenth year with a testosterone laden son with sanity more or less intact. It'll get better one of these days and you will have the satisfaction of watching your child pull his hair out over the antics of his own children.:thumbup:

[reverie 49]

Definitely happens! Stress = tightened band for me. You may want to stick to liquids/soft foods for the rest of the day. Hopefully you feel better tomorrow!

[BusyMom1961 1]

Thanks for the kind words.

Somedays he drives me crazy. I always love him, liking him at times is not always easy.

I really try not to stress when I eat or I won't be eating. I don't try to eat anything after that happens.

He knows what it does to me also and most times tries not to get me worked up over a meal, but sometimes it happens.

Thanks again.

[sherun 1]

Thanks for the info... I am only a week banded, but I have a 2 teenage daughters(17 and 14)-TRADE U!!!-- my 17 year old causes all kind of problems at home, and Ive noticed when I start getgin stressed and all upset- My band gets tight, my chest hurts... Its such an obvious sign.. I'm glad to know its actually my body trying to tell me to calm down.. Good Luck.. and just think-- He could be twins... LOL:ohmy:

[Llyra 3]

TWINS? Oh, Sherun, that is so low. Just the thought of twin 15 year old sons is enough to slam shut the band of the most stoic parent.

I also have a 17 year old daughter. Some days she is a delight. Other days... well, not so much.

(all parents of teenagers gather together for a group hug and a rousing chorus of "we shall over come.")

[jingleboob 5]

Haha! Too funny. I'm newly banded but we have an 11 year old girl who is so hormonal and moody she's lucky to be alive!!! BEFORE my band she gave me chest tightness when she was in a mood and super defiant... and I know we've got YEARS of this left... and then when she's over it all her sister will be into it. I'm looking at at least 8 more years of cranky hormonal girls!!! If my band reacts like yours I could be a size 2 anyday now!!!

[spoiltmom 44]

Wow I'm glad I read this thread. At least I know what might happen to my band now. I have a 9 year old son with ADHD and a 3 year old daughter with ADHD. I can't even imagine what they will be like as teens. I also have a 5 month old but right now he's sweet and cuddly and is no problem.

[PrincessErin 64]

I'm glad I read this thread, too - not for the tightening band warning but also because now I know I'm not alone in my Quest to find peace and calm in my relationship with my 15 year old son. It's not easy!

[BetsyB 9]

I have a 14-year-old son who's feeling his oats, so I empathize completely. He doesn't slam my band shut--but his 48-year-old father does!

Stress is a HUGE problem for me, in terms of band comfort. I have found a couple of things helpful. First, I do keep a good supply of good-quality Protein powder on hand--sometimes, I just have to respect the band, and baby it.

But more helpfully, I've started meditation and biofeedback. The difference is amazing.

When all else fails, a dose of liquid Benadryl eases the swelling enough to permit eating. (It also makes me sleepy, so I don't use it often.)

In a pinch, a glass of red wine a half hour before a meal can help tremendously, as well.

But truly, meditation has made an enormous, enormous difference for me physically as well as emotionally. I recommend it highly.

ETA: I remember 15 as being the worst year of my life (well, other than this one)---so I have lots of empathy for the kids in this stage too. FWIW, I have a 21-year-old daughter who emerged from adolescence unscathed---so I have great faith that our boys, as much as they test us, will also emerge. But it's a really rough time for them, too. (It would be so much easier if their hormones weren't rollercoastering the same time their mothers' hormones were! Did you know that body fat is estrogenic, and as we lose, our serum estrogen levels are skewed? That plays in, quite a lot, to our responses,I think--and I think it also plays into the responses of our bands. I know that I have huge variation in tightness during different stages of my cycle---and having the extra estrogen coursing through my veins really has an effect, as well.)

Edited August 30, 2010 by BetsyB

[2beskinny 4]

Thanks for the info... I am only a week banded, but I have a 2 teenage daughters(17 and 14)-TRADE U!!!-- my 17 year old causes all kind of problems at home, and Ive noticed when I start getgin stressed and all upset- My band gets tight, my chest hurts... Its such an obvious sign.. I'm glad to know its actually my body trying to tell me to calm down.. Good Luck.. and just think-- He could be twins... LOL:ohmy:

OK, I HAVE 15 year old twin boys and a 17 year old son...I guess I win, ha! Knock on wood...they are all great teens. I would take teens over toddlers anyday! My boys are getting ready to age up to 18 and 16...wow...time is flying. Maybe because we can see how limited our time left with them all at home is we appreciate this time soooo much! I will comment, however, that when one of my twins clipped off the rear view mirror of the car pulling it out of the garage (temporary permit stage), my band didn't seem to have a reaction, but my husband sure did:biggrin:.

[CheckYes 46]

As a daughter who, at 16, ran away from home, stole money from my Dad and his car, said horrible things to my parents, got my stuff together, graduated with a degree in Psychology, went on to law school and have been in practice as an attorney for 8 years - I can tell you - ONE DAY THEY WILL APPRECIATE YOU. I promise. I still cringe when I think of what I put them through.

Hang in there!

[SkinnyOompa 0]

OMG I'm so glad I read this thread as a mother of 4 boys - 22, 21, 18 & 14 and a husband who has a broken foot and off work for 8 weeks. Maybe the STRESS level in my house is causing the band issue. I've been I guess you would call it restricted or stuck. Seems like nothing is going down easy. I've been trying to baby it by yogurt, Soups, Hot Drinks, cold drinks, nothing seem to be helping. One bite and there it goes burning in throat and feeling full. Maybe being back to work after a long frustrating weekend will release the feeling of being restricted. Thanks for posting. Try to have a stress free work week. I know I'm going to try.