Need Encouragement

[pongomp 1]

Hey Bandsters -

Writng today out of frustration and disappointment & just looking to vent it out and get some advice and/or encouragement.

I was banded in April 2008. My starting weight was 323 and I got down to 205, which was a great weight for me. I maintained a weight of 205-210 for about a year.

About 3 months ago I noticed I was having a lot of reflux at

night and no real feeling of restriction. That was odd for me

because I had my band very tight, which was my comfort level. I have a realize band that holds 11 cc's and had it filled to 10 cc's. I went to see my doctor & she was not in, so I saw the assistant. I explained that I wasn't feeling as much restriction. I neglected to mention the reflux. So, he put in another .5cc's. Within a week I had even worse reflux and could tell something was really off. I saw my doctor and she said I had the symptoms of the band being too tight and it was likely the top of my stomach had folded over the band.

She removed all the fill from the band, put me on a soft diet, and told me to come back in 2 weeks.

When I went back, she did a fill under fluro of 5cc's. After that I didn't relly feel that much restriction, but at least the reflux was gone.

A month later I went back for a check up and she put in another 1 cc.

Again I really don't feel that much restriction. I know that she is being cautous so as not to have the band too tight, but at the same time I have been gaining weight because I do not feel full.

It feels like I am hungry all the time and that is frustrating because that is how I felt before the band & I don't want that again. My weight is now up to 230, which is still better than the original 323, but I want to get back to the low 200's again.

I have another apt this Friday for a check up & fill, and am hoping she can put more in. I don't want to have the problem of it being too tight again either...but I know that I need it to be more restrictive.

I am also frustrated becasue every visit with a fill is a $50 co-pay for me. I know it is safer to fill it slowly over time, but man it would be cheaper just to put more in at each visit.

I think overall I am most disappointed with myself. I had thought that after 2 years, I would have control over my eating and portions and that the band was just a helper, but that I was really doing it. But now, without the band working as hard as it was, I realize that it was the reason I was able to loose so much and keep it off...by preventing me from eating too much. It's scary to realize how much I need and depend on that little piece of silicone to live my life the way I want to. Without it, it seems I don't have any cotrol over my eating.

I guess I am just frustrated & unhappy with myself...really, I am the only one to blame. I can't blame the band or the doctor...I am the one putting the food in my mouth.

I don't know what I'm looking for on this site, I think I just needed to get it out there.

Has anyone else had a similiar situation?

Thanks for reading.

[BandedCG 0]

I'm sorry you are having problems. I have gone through the "too tight", then "not tight enough" stages, too and it is frustrating.

There've been times I wish I had not even messed with it and just left well enough alone -- and not tried to get tightened.

Hopefully you will hit that "sweet spot" and start losing again soon.

Hang in there.

[annieM 2]

I had to have my band removed and replaced and until my restriction was tight enough I had gained back 25 lbs. It was just awful. Then I had to lose it all over again. It's hard work but it can be done.

Hopefully you will get restriction back again and be able to keep it long enough to get your weight off again too. I know that I am totally dependent on my band and that scares me since I almost lost it once. I like being thin...

[gingerjane 5]

I'm worrying right now that my band is loose. I went in on the 23rd and they did not do a fill because they felt I was close to my sweet spot but I swear, I can eat more now that I was eating. It's like all of the sudden it's opened up. I've lost about 17+ lbs between my last fill and now and my next appointment isn't until September and I'm getting hungry about every three hours.

I thought about calling to see if I could get it moved up, but I don't think they'll do it.

I sometimes worry that I'm too dependent on it to make me stop.

Do you think your doctor will give you a bit more of a fill the next time if you ask? Just say that you're not getting the same restriction?

[SpecialK 22]

Jack sure has some good wisdom things here but I also know that it took me 50 years to get all my bad habits down pat and now with 2.5 yrs post banding practice, I do good alot of the time and still seek food comfort other times. Its a commitment to work it one day at a time for me.

And ask for help, seek out support groups you can attend, get couseling for what is "eating" at you, and stay committed.