Unbanded after 4.5 years....

[tizag 0]

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Warning! When I started to write this post I thought it would be a few paragraphs. It has turned into a few pages (!!). It’s L_O_N_G! J<O:p</O:p

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Hi everyone, <O:p

This is my first post on this forum, however I must confess I have been lurking here for some time.....I have just been so busy with kids and work that I didn't feel it was fair of me to post if I couldn't be a regular contributor.<O:p</O:p

<O:p</O:pWith that said, I do feel like I have gotten to know many of you from your posts, and I wanted to share my story. And in all honesty, I need to share, and I could use support. I see that a few of you have been unbanded lately, and it's nice not to be alone.

<O:p</O:pI am now 32 years old. I struggled with my weight for a long time, up and down... up and down. At my wedding in 1999 I was down to around 70 kilo/150ish pounds and felt great. And then the weight began to come back again. In 2 short years I was up to around 99 kilo/ 218 pounds. I felt horrible, and I wasn't successful in getting pregnant after trying for over 1.5 years. In June of 2001 I got banded.

<O:p</O:pMy life changed - it was wonderful! Losing weight was not the only good thing about the band.... I loved that I felt 'full' nearly all of the time. I felt freedom from thinking about food constantly, and I felt freedom from feeling the need to eat every second of the day and night. It was great.

<O:p</O:p

Six months post-op I lost 27 kilo/ 60ish pounds. While I was far from thin, I had so much energy and just felt so good... and I loved being hunger-free. I was at the gym every day and felt so healthy. The BEST news of all though - I was pregnant!!!! Finally! I am certain it was my weight-loss and the band that got me there (in addition to my husband's help

<O:p</O:p

I really didn't gain weight during most of my pregnancy. Only the last three months after I had the band opened I gained around 4 kilo / 10ish pounds. My incredible daughter was born in July 2002.

A few months later I got a fill. This was followed by a bunch of fills and unfills over the next few months, but each time the band was still too 'tight', too 'lose'...never 'just right' like before.

<O:p</O:pThen the horrible reflux and heartburn started. I couldn't eat properly and began to gain weight. Before I could get full on healthy foods, now I was just eating whatever I could. Lettuce and salad and veggies didn't go down easily, but Cookies and ice-cream did Soups did. So this is what I ate.

<O:p</O:pIn the February of 2003 I had horrible stomach and port-area pain. I was sure there was a knife in me, and I couldn't move the pain was so intense. After a few visits to the ER and the doctor, I was admitted to the hospital and put on IV antibiotics and did a endoscope/endoscopy and a CT. Everything was fine and after 3 days on only IV / IV antibiotics I did feel better. The doctor said there could have been an infection in the port area - who knows. <O:p

Things didn't get better however. I never felt good. The heartburn was always there. I was taking huge doses of meds against acid reflux and nothing helped. In May 2003 I began waking up a few times a night coughing and vomiting in my sleep. This is the worst feeling. Like you are gagging and cannot breath. I had to sleep sitting up in my Lazy Boy chair, I couldn't think of lying down. I also had trouble swallowing and felt like there was a lump in my throat all the time. Ugh. I did lose weight at this point, but I was eating only liquids - not a way to survive. After about 4 months of hell, the vomiting in the night stopped. But I had zero energy and was exercising a lot less... and the weight came back more.

<O:p</O:pI was honestly doing everything right to make the band work - but I would go thru periods of extreme tightness where I would have to spit out my saliva in a cup (sorry to be 'graphic’), and then the band would get loose again. No way to live.

<O:p</O:p

From my journal in Feb of 2004: "I have been without a fill for about 2 months - no problems at all, so about three weeks ago I went back to the dr. and got a fill. For two weeks I was fine, and I have been eating perfectly... then boom. Last Tuesday all of a sudden my band just closed up. I ran to the bathroom just in time and vomited. This continued all last week... on Fri and Sat I got down about 1 glass of Water the entire day (and vomited about 20 times in-between)... yesterday I don't think I kept down even 1 spoonful of Water.< /span>

Last night was HELL. Every time I feel asleep I would be woken up after 5 minutes chocking and coughing and vomiting... finally at 3am I went to sleep/sit on the Lazy Boy chair. No fun. To make matters worse, my husband is out of the country on business. Anyways, I am going back to dr. this afternoon. I am really thirsty... I took a super tiny sip of water about an hour ago and it put such pressure on my back that I had to vomit it up. *sigh*

I don't know what to do. Why is this happening? And I have been eating good - almost all liquid, mush foods, chewing really good and no eating and drinking together. Not fair!"

<O:p</O:p

So that was February 2004. Needless to say, I had the fill taken out. Relief. Soon after I found out I was pregnant again. I was beyond thrilled!!!! I didn't dare get another fill while I was pregnant. I gained a lot of weight (around 18 kilo / 40ish pounds) and in November 2004 I gave birth to my beautiful son (at home, which was very unplanned, but that's another story, and a wonderful one!!! <O:p

In March 2005 I had my first fill since my son was born, and the problems started again, and I had the fill taken out. And put in again. Same story.<O:p

In October I suddenly got "attacks" after I ate, that lasted around 1 - 2 hours. Extreme nausea (even after eating my baby's Gerber!) and pain that spread to my right shoulder blade and my back like a knife. I was sure it was my gallbladder as I have a few friends who had their gallbladder out and they told me attacks were like this. I did an ultrasound of the gallbladder, but everything was OK. I didn't really sleep or eat during October. I just felt bad all the time.

<O:p</O:pIn November the pain was so intense one night (and this wasn’t after eating)...it was like being in labor, but in my upper back. I went to the ER at 3am. I really didn't think it had to do anything with the band (though it was making crazy gurgling noises and I had some heartburn - so I guess I was in major denial). The doctor on duty in the ER took out my fill completely. I felt better, but that was because the "attack" passed. The next day the intense nausea continued and the back pain continued. Every time it hit my back I kept thinking 'this is more painful than having a baby'. I again went to the ER (a different one this time!), and they did a scan of the stomach/gallbladder, and said that everything was fine. I mentioned the band (this isn't a hospital that specializes in the band), but they said it wasn't connected. I went home crying.

<O:p</O:pLast week, on Sunday, November 27, along with everything else, the band suddenly got very tight. I was without a fill, so I knew this wasn't good. Monday afternoon, after a day without managing to get down water, I went back to my dr. He sent me back to the ER (again!), called to tell them I was coming, and to do an x-ray with me swallowing contrast stuff so they could see if anything was going down.

I somehow drank the stuff, had the x-rays, and vomited up black stuff. Very scary since the stuff I drank was clear, and I hadn't eaten in two days, and even before that I don't remember eating anything black. Was it blood? Anyways, whatever stayed down just sat in a pouch above the band. It didn’t go down.

<O:p</O:pI was put on IV and admitted to the hospital. Tuesday I had an endoscope/endoscopy done. No erosion in the band, but they saw that my esophagus was full of infection. My dr. told me the band was fine and in place.... and to try to drink water. I did, and got a bit down. And woke up in the night in the hospital coughing and choking on the few sips of water I had earlier. Not good.

Wednesday I had a CT. My dr. said everything was perfect with the band. He said "if you feel better you can go home". I just burst out crying. My doctor is a leading band doctor in the world. He was one of the first doctors to do the surgery 15 or so years ago (I don't live in America). He has banded over 6000 people. I began to think I would ruin his impressive statistics and that is why he didn't suggest to take out the band. He said we would talk again the next day. <O:p

Thursday morning I was depressed. Four nights in the hospital already, hooked up to IV and missing my kids sooooooooooooooo much. I hadn't had anything to eat except a few sips of water in nearly a week. (Though I wasn't hungry... I think the fear of having the horrible nausea/back pain kept any hunger pains away). I knew the band had to come out. My dr. then came and said that everything seems ok, “but if you cannot even drink, the band has to come out”. Thanks for the wise advice!!!!! He said he wouldn't leave me suffering, and promised to fit me in as an emergency the same day to remove the band, even if he had to do the surgery at midnight. (At least that was nice of him.)

I was actually quite relaxed. No real pre-surgery jitters. I did trust my dr. and I just felt so bad, I wanted the pain to end. I didn't let myself mourn or anything.... I just waited with my husband.

At 5pm they came and took me to the operating area. When I saw my dr. he said to me "I am sorry....". I started to cry and barely got out the words "Can I please keep my band after you remove it.....”?

Next thing I knew I was going to sleep, and then waking up. I have to say that coming out of the anesthetic was quite easy. I had no side effects from it, and was given a shot of morphine as soon as I awoke and really didn't have pain. I reached down where I had felt my port for the past 4 years and 6 months, and only felt a bandage.

The dr. told my husband after the surgery that when he went inside to remove the band he saw that I had a pretty severe infection both in the band area and the port area. He also said that both areas had extreme inflammation (thus causing the blockage).

I went back to my room at 8pm and was put on high doses of antibiotics via IV. By 1am I was up walking... physically I was doing OK. Mentally I didn't even let myself think about it.

Friday morning I was given a "gift" from my doctor. My band. Cut in two places when it was removed.

Finally this morning (Sunday) I came home from the hospital, with another 10 days supply of antibiotics. I have eaten some Soup with carrots, some yogurt, some of my baby's Gerber. Everything goes down. No pain. It feels weird.

<O:p</O:p

I haven't cried. Or rather I should say I haven't cried until now. Sitting here for the past hour writing this has brought on the flow of tears... it feels so good to get it out!

Should this very long post be called "Four years of hell...", or "Four wonderful years..." I am not at all sure. I went thru a lot. Weight has been an issue my entire life. I feel like a huge failure... even this I couldn't do right. But then I think that if I didn't have the band I most likely wouldn't be hearing someone say "Mommy, I want some juice please" this moment.

After my first prgnancy the band just never acted as it did before. I won't let myself regret getting pregnant so soon after being banded, but others considering the band and having a baby might want to take this into consideration.

So where am I? Still overweight (thought a bit less then where I started), and for some unexplained reason also optimistic. Maybe because I do have a completely different relationship with food then I had before I was banded. I have been eating to live for the past 4.5 years, not living to eat as I did before. Hmmmm. It's been a long trip; I am actually not sure what I am feeling yet.

It's getting quite late here so I am off to sleep. For anyone that has actually read this longest-post-in-the-world, thanks for listening!

<O:p<O:p</O:p

PS. I would love to be in contact with others that have been unbanded - we need each other for support.

PPS. If you are thinking about getting banded and you asked my opinion, I am honestly not sure what I would say. I absolutely did not write this to deter anyone. I just wrote it because it happened to me.

PPPS. If you are wondering where my broken band is now.... it's in my bed, under my pillow. :)<O:p</O:p

[leatha_g 4]

That's a very touching post. I'm really glad you're okay and very glad you have two children whom you love to show for your time invested in the band. I think somehow, this love affair with our bands is a 'hope' somehow that we'll not have to be overweight all our lives. Like so many other things we've tried, it's a very promising Hope, but I think we're finding that even the band is not yet that perfect 'be all and end all' that we'd like it to be. That's unfortunate, but without those of us who've had the opportunity to be a part of it, it might not be perfected for those who come after us. I do hope eventually there is a 'be all and end all' for those of us who desire to be thinner and healthier.

I know it won't be easy, but you have the tools to make better choices and exercise after this amount of time. Keep your chin up and hold on to those newly formed habits. Good luck to you!

[kellymoos 4]

That was a wonderful post!! Thanks for sharing your experience with us!!!!

[Alexandra 55]

That is a wonderful and generous post, Tizag. May I ask what country you were banded in? And I'm wondering if your doctor gave you any indication how long you may have had an infection in your esophagus?

My best wishes to you for complete and total healing. Sounds like your esophagus has had a very rough time of it.

Please do come and post any time you want. Former bandsters have as much or more to contribute than current bandsters!

[mousecrazy 2]

Hi, I read your post, every word. I am sorry you went through so much suffering and am glad you feel better physically. You have two little sweethearts, and that is definitely something for which to be grateful! You are not a failure, anymore than someone with any other condition (cancer, diabetes, etc) is a failure. Physical problems happen. You could have also had some kind of physical problem if you never had a band. Not the problem you had, but something different. Hopefully, your relationship with food is so different now, and you have learned alot about yourself and eating, that you are up to the next challenge. Blessings to you, and thank you so much for your story, Cindy

[banded_for_life 2]

That was a wonderful post!! I am sorry you had to go through all of that, but you inspire me to not give up hope that this will work for me. Congats on those babies...I too have two children and they make me glad to wake up everyday. Welcome to LBT!

[Maggie63 0]

tizag-

i almost did not read your post...i was afraid it would freak me out : )....i am so glad that i read it. i have beeen banded for exactly 69 hours...it is so good for me to hear stories like yours. i am so sad that this happened to you, but know that sharing has enlighted those who are just starting their journey. it is important that we know both the good and bad news stories...to think that banding is THE ANSWER to weight loss is being niave.

i will pray for you, and your continued health...please do the same for us...

[dylansmom 27]

Thank you for your post. Sorry it came to having to have it removed, but I am happy that you can now begin healing up from the infection.

Congrats on your children, as I know myself what a huge blessing they are.

[Magic 0]

Tizag,

You are the angel of mercey:)

I'll tell you why? 20 minutes ago, I checked my own post and there was no reply. So I went to read others posts as usual, and then I went to your thread, and I read your long story, every word of it. By the time I finished reading your post, I went back to my question and there is your answer!!!! it seemed like we both read each others posts in the same time:)

Your story was very touchy, and I felt sad at first, then I got really happy as I read "Mom I want some juice" you said you wouldn't have heard this sweet voice if u didn't get the band.

I'm glad you got 2 little angels to spread happines in your life, and I'm glad you are strong.

Thanks for your reply to my question about the gastroscopy in my thread, best of luck to you and all the best:)

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[HarleyNana 10]

Thank you for taking the time for write such an in-depth thread. Like Cindy, I read every word. At dinner tonight, my mother who is also banded had to go to RR to spit, she has an episode every time she eats. I told her she needed to get back on LBT and start reading about the problems people were having with irritation to the esophagus. I'm copying your thread and emailing it to her right now.

God Bless You!

[Jachut 487]

Your story is a very touching, but also a wonderful reminder to make the most of the band and work hard with it while it is there. I guess its become obvious to me that you cannot assume you will have it for life and that something could go wrong to any one of us.

[duyesaka 0]

Dear Tizag,

Thank you so much for your story. You are so heroic to have gone through so much. and yes two gifts from above. I am 12 days with a new band, and I will make a promise to myself to watch my intake. I had a hernia graft with my band, did not know it was so bad, so I realize I had better be very careful not to overwork my esophagus, GERD was really bad for me for years. Nothing even remote to your experience. You were tenacious in your battles, but clearly you could have lost your life. Infection, especially for such a long time is so dangerous. Your little ones need you banded or not. I am going to copy your post and refer to it when I need some wisdom and reality. Thank you for all the words. You truly are a fighter and don't forget how hard you tried, for you have that strength to continue on with a healthy life for yourself, and for your little ones to be an example and "alive"!

Debra

[desertmom 297]

hi

Reading this has really made me so sad.

I am battling so many of the same issues with NO VISIBLE REASON for it.....pain,severe portpain(dont complain about that though,people said it is normal..)severe reflux and heartburn.....pain that goes through to my back all the time.....severe restricted feeling around my ribcage....and on and on.....not always the same but something all the time...At the moment the band is empty,no reflux or heartburn just the stabbing pain between my breasts and the chestpain and back pain.......and I will mail my dr now to book the endo....I dont want to....want everything to be fine and all these stuff to just go away....but reading this post made me sure that one cannot just leave it to sort out by itself....who knows what the outcome might be.....

I really hope that things work out well for you now.Good luck.

[melati 0]

I am so sorry for you!

Did you become infected during surgery or a fill? I have never heard of this happening...Who is your surgeon?

[tizag 0]

Hi everyone,

Thanks so much for your wonderful replies.

I will try to answer all of your questions, but first I want to make it clear that I did NOT post this to scare anyone.... After everything, I do not regret being banded. In fact I feel very priviliged to have had the opportunity.

Right on the Inamed website it says that 25% of people banded end up having their bands removed. It's something that everyone should be aware of. I was aware of this before being banded, and it didn't stop me - so don't let it stop you, or scare you.... just be aware! I was sure when I was banded that it would be for life, that nothing would happen to me. And I was good with eating and following the rules... so you never know.

Everything has it's risks in life, you just have decide what is best for you. For some people it's the band, for some people it's gastric bypass, for some people it's weight watchers, for others it's nothing. All are OK if you are comfortable with your decision!

I would however advise people that want to get pregnant after being banded to wait 1-2 years. I actually read this recently on one of the 'doctor' websites. Lose your weight first, then get pregnant. The band was perfect for me - the problems only began after my pregnancy. It might be connected, and it might not be connected. We'll never know. One of life's mysteries.

I often heard that the band is not only banding your stomach, but also your head. I am certain there is a lot of truth to that. Today is my 4th day without the band. I have permission to eat everything. So far I am eating great. Small amounts of healthy foods and chewing very slowly. The cravings and desires to binge that I had before I was banded have not returned.

I might be naive as I just had the band removed.... but as I mentioned above, for the past 4.5 years, I just ate to live, I didn't live to eat. My eating habits and relationship with food has changed completely - there is no reason to think that I can't keep it this way, right?

Before I was banded I never was able to feel the wonders of healthy eating. Being with the band let me see how wonderful it feels to be filled up with healthy foods, not tons of sugars or carbs. I don't want to feel yucky again from eating the wrong way, so hopefully I won't. I have tasted the good life full of energy - I am certainly going to try my hardest not to let that go!

I promise I will keep you all updated on what happens over the next year, because as time goes on, more people will have to have their bands removed, I think that is inevitable. But maybe it won't be a bad thing. Who knows... we'll see!

So for those of you who are thinking of getting banded, my advise is that if you are comfortable with your decision after researching everything, GO FOR IT! If you are not sure, or don't feel it's right for you, then don't do it. Personally however, I would not deter anyone from getting the band.

For those of you that are banded, enjoy your band and be thankful everyday that it works good for you. And don't look back and have any regrets ever - have fun and look towards tomorrow with a smile. :)