male only Bedding Hotties.

[muelle 64]

I am enjoying reading everyone's different ideas of what a 10 is. I know guys that are big and not so big that I think are equally a 10. I agree that for most people, it does come down to the person's confidence level. I now weigh the same as I did when I was in my late teens and early twenties (finally) and when I was younger I would get 2nd looks and attention, but now I get them a lot more. My husband's friends and coworkers make comments to him and myself, about me, and my girls and husband tell me that guys flirt with me all the time. I guess I've been married so long I don't even notice it lol. I personally don't see it and don't have the confidence. I had a friend that hasn't seen me in awhile standing behind me, whistling at me, and I didn't even turn around because I figured there was no way the whistle was for me So don't fall into my lack of confidence trap and you will always be a 10

[NYsLegend78 29]

I am almost down to my Army weight :0). I agree with Lito it's all about confidence and game

[bushbaby 8]

So now its 3 years later I wonder if everyone is still feeling the same about a 10?

[Daveo 485]

Hell I'd just like a date with a nice 4-5 right now. lol

[Kevbear 6]

A lot of it depends on how old you are

What women look for when they are 22 is very different at 32 and different at 42

I've been married for almost 18 years, so I am not dating

However, when I was in law school in my 30s I had several, extremely attractive, classmates make their availability known.......despite being at possibly the heaviest I've ever been

The most recent girl that made it clear if I wanted to wander I could is 22, and quite attractive

I never have wandered and don't intend to start. My point is simply I was hit on when I was skinny, and when I was heavy too

I do think for me there are a certain number of factors

1). Yes, I am way overweight. But it's deceptive because I'm also six and a half feet tall, and (as I jokingly tell people) cut under all this fat. I look a lot like most offensive linemen do, which makes sense, because I was one. I'm fat, not bad looking

2). I'm married. I hate to say it, but that does attract a certain class of ladies. And the more I say no, the more some press.

3). The Kevin James effect as already described. I'm a confident, outgoing person. As was said, if you're a skinny douchebag I think you have less chance than if you are really cool big guy. Most "9s and 10s" as the OP worded it can be choosy as hell. Being skinny won't just do it. Nor will a great personality.

Oh, and please, for god's sake, never refer to it as "game" around women

Edited July 27, 2015 by Kevbear

[OKCPirate 5,323]

Well in the guys defense, they called it "game" in the men's room before the ladies showed up.

I've now had 3 years of dating at 300 pounds and several months at 220 something. The quality and quantity of the women who I have gone out with has increased dramatically.

So has the "friskyness" of the women I have dated. I have never had this much sex ever. I don't know if it is confidence, or looks, but same old me with 80 pounds less fat and the ladies seem to like it more.

[LovinSoul 113]

Well I can say that I've never had that problem. Have I encountered the occasional beast called push back yes but hey nothing easy can ever be as fun as what's hard to obtain. Game is game any man can pick up any woman even if he is as big as butter bean but only a real man can be seductive in his conquest. I am a firm believer a hard 10 isnt looking for another 10 cyz guess what only hard 10s go for her n they r the ones to hurt her the issue is how do you get her attention how do you start a conversation with our bring intimidated women respect confidence elegance and respond to respect but really wants to be turned on out of bed as in bed but with personality. I've never had problems with women the only reason why I had this surgery was because of my health but I must say the ladies did love me. Your either born with it or you can always learn it. Read the book the art of seduction it is the truth.

Thinking you may be a strong Latino man. You sound like my man. Solid post.

[LovinSoul 113]

Just read this whole thread. Sorry guys...I'm female, but it was just so great to read. I don't presume to understand what the guys need to know or hear about "bedding hotties" but I know a few things, mostly obvious:

1. Physical attraction brought me to every man I ever slept with. Later the other stuff kept me there. For me physical attraction included a "reasonable" BMI. Muscle development/fitness was key, but not body builder type necessary.

2. Men hit on me when I was thinner and not when I was obese.

3. Sex was/is better thinner. My husband is happier with me thinner because of that and my majorly increased confidence, fitness and stamina. Of course...duh.

It's a no brainer....if you want "your" 10, be your best you. It's all about you thinking you're okay. Maybe for some guys it doesn't require "thinness" and a "10" face and bod, but just requiires reasonably fit health and great other personal qualities. But for the superficial 1st approach, it really IS about your look for the most part. That being said...the look includes body, but also includes a lot of body language: smile, laugh, confidence. And also not blurting stupidisms. LOL