Fear of fills!

[kfstinson 0]

I am having a psychological problem with fills. I had my 1st fill the end of May. When I went back to my appointment in June, I elected NOT to get another one. I probably needed one but the experience was not pleasant. Don't get me wrong...the doctor didn't do anything wrong. It is ME! The thought of a needle digging around in me stressed me out! I almost passed out the first time. Today, I knew that I needed a fill. I've known I needed one. I am hungry and really have to do a lot of self talk to 'get me through' the hungry moments. Today's fill was a little better. I could still feel/hear the needle hitting the plastic port BUT I did not feel like passing out this time. The psychologist at my support meeting recommended I use my iPod when I have fills so I did. That did seem to help but I really think my problem is 2 fold. (1) the sound and pressure and (2) I'm scared I'm not going to be able to eat. I've had 2 very painful 'stucks' since surgery (my own fault for not chewing my chicken well enough) and I don't want to experience that again.

BTW: I was banded in March and have lost 42 lbs. as of today so I must be doing something right and the band is really helping.

Any words of wisdom? Anyone else experience this fear???

One last side note...I'm the kind of person who does not get queasy at the sight of blood and I have a very high tolerance for pain. Why is this bothering ME? Told you...it is psychological!!!!!!