Wanting to tell him so bad about my band!

[Graceful One 4]

I find this so aggravating.

I met a guy a few months ago online and we had alot in common including our rare breed of dog, a Vizsla. When we met in person, even after our good chemistry via email and on the phone, even after seeing a pic, he never emailed me back.

His loss!

What was too funny is tonight as I searched Match.com I came across him...I sent him an email basically stating that I assumed our meeting under an assumption of friendship and only that...apparently he didn't...

In his profile it stated he wants someone who's blonde and slim/slender or athletic and toned. Well I am athletic and toned but far from being slim/slender...nor would I want to be...justification for him being too scrawny in my opionion.

How bad I wanted to say, "I just lost 25lbs in the past month and plan on losing 75lb more thanks to my new little friend the Lap-Band...Oh, and I have a great stylist who does fantastic blonde highlights! But this is your loss for being a complete JERK!"

I didn't of course...but how funny would that have been!

[quakergirl 2]

Well, you know what they say...the best revenge is living well. In a year, you'll probably be at goal weight and feeling great, while he'll still be a jerk.

[claraluz 2]

I definitely feel your pain. Been there, done that. Last year I met a guy on Match.com. Just as you say, we had everything in common, including obesity. Only he was much more obese than I. We exchanged pictures. We e-mailed daily and he was very admiring in his e-mails. We finally met in person and it just wasn't happening and after that he never wanted anything more to do with me. So discouraging.

But you are getting healthy, you are becoming even more beautiful. Who needs him?

Nancy

[Vera 7]

Isn't it odd that the guys all want some perfect girl, when they themselves are not without flaws.

Accept me for who I am.

I have alittle theory, relationships are like stepping stones to your soulmate.

Theres someone out there just for you.

I'm probably not much of a comfort for you now, but I do feel for you and your not alone.

[bandmenow 0]

Just remember: you had this surgey for yourself! If you start making apologies to a stranger for the way you were before your weightloss, then that person will always expect you to feel sorry for yourself for that fact that you had a weight problem, or for just being yourself. Women make this kind of mistake all of the time, especially to their husbands or boyfriends. The best way to avoid this kind of manipulation is to think, "If you're not man enough to handle the truth about someone's life, then you're not man enough for me." Besides, the guy's vacancy just allows space for the "real deal." Keep up the positive attitude and you'll find the right guy! But for the mean time, live your life to the fullest! You've got a new body to get comfortable in!

Nichole

[bandmenow 0]

Oh yeah, junst one more thing......Stay away from guys who want slim-tight girls. That's a good indicator that no matter who you are and what you look like, he's never going to be satisfied. Someone who really loves you....loves you for who you are, not what number pops up on the scale!

(Ok, no more ranting!)

[Lioness81970 0]

Someone who really loves you....loves you for who you are, not what number pops up on the scale!

I have to second that entirely.....I guess I ws one of the lucky ones cause when I decided to have the surgery my husband said "I hope you aren't doing this for me cause I am going to love you regardless of the way you look." That made me feel really good and when he said that I knew he loved me for ME!!

[bandmenow 0]

You're right Carmen, you are one of the lucky ones, as well as I. My husband supports whatever I do just as long as it will make me happy. He understands that if I'm not happy with myself, he can't make me happy.

But it's a whole different world out there for some of these newly-banded, single people. Whether we are male or female, before the surgery most of us spent a great deal of our lives worrying about what people thought about us,"will she like me?" "Will he think I'm fat?"THese are common feelings we struggled with on a daily basis. And now, we're getting thinner, we're looking at life from a positively, different perspective, and we still want to be loved. It's rough! I'm glad I'm not in the playing field anymore, skinny or not!

[Graceful One 4]

Thanks to all for your kind words...

I must now give you my exciting update!

I was farting around with EHarmony the other week and had a "match." We started talking and last night progressed to regular email. He also gave me his number and we had a blast talking on the phone for an hour and a half...got along splendidly...but here's the best part...

He is a 31 year old Anesthesiologist! Never married, owns a home, and has a super personality! He asked a few times what my schedule was this week...definately hoping I get a call back!

See...God does work in mysterious ways...

Jennye

[Vera 7]

So Happy for you:D

[donali 57]

You go, Jennye!!!

Please keep us posted - oh, how I LOVE romance!

[claraluz 2]

Jennye, that's great news! I, too, have just started with eHarmony. Let us know how it goes!

Nancy