Help! Significant Other not on board with surgery!

[MelJ113074 0]

Hey Guys,

I was wondering if anyone out there has a significant other that isn't happy about the surgery? My husband has not been very supportive since the beginning. In his eyes (God Bless His Soul) I'm fine just the way I am and don't need the surgery. He doesn't talk about it at all and I'm susposed to be having it done in less than 1 week (hopefully my insurance pulls through!).

I just don't know what to do. He's not mean about it, he just acts like the surgery doesn't exist. Yesterday was the first time he asked me how long I was going to be out of work for and was surprised when I told him 2 weeks and I was getting paid for it. He still see's this as an elective surgery.

Well I was just wondering if anyone else out there is going through a similar situation.

Take care,

Melissa

[gracesmom1 0]

Melissa,

I can't say that I am in the same situation, but I can see your frustration. It is a hard thing for someone without a weight issue to wrap their minds around it. I have surgery Monday and it wasn't till yesterday that my hubby asked why I think I need this. HELLO??? Couldn't this conversation have happened earlier? I h=know it is hard but give your sig other time. Ask him if he has questions. Be honest with your answers. I found that just throwing out comments to probe for questions worked. He finally has an understanding now as to why I need this. And, lets not forget about the eventual outcome. You will be thinner, happier, more energetic, basically you will be a little different. I have a friend that has been married almost 20+ years and she hd bypass done. Well, she was about 5'1 and close to 300lbs. She now is like 150 lbs. She has fire, spunk, energy, and she smiles all the time. She said her hubby had a very hard time dealing with the "new" wife. They almost had to re-introduce themselves to each other. I know you want him to be there for you, but be sure you are there for him. You hopefully have a strong partnership and support will be needed for both of you. Good luck with everything. I hope I didn't scare you, I just wanted to shed light on other things to think about. Take care! - Ann