Being Social - Does anyone struggle with this?

[LadyA76 0]

Hi All! I am now 9 days post op and i am feeling a lot better. As I have been recovering it has crossed my mind several times how this lifestyle change will effect my social life...I wasn't the wild party animal but I did my fair share of partying and hosting get togethers...people used to look forward to coming over for cocktails, food (they said we fried the best chicken) and baked ziti, basically all the things we are giving up...so anyway we were invited to a cookout yesterday and I was debating rather I should go...but I really don't want to become anti social or end up alienating myself so I took the challenge...I went to the cook out, I did advise the host (who does not know I have been banded) that me and partner will not be able to eat but we will come and socialize. My support has not had lap band but is following the same diet plan as myself with a few alterations to ensure proper nutrition. But anyway, long story short I went to the cook out and I took a 1/2 cup of Soup with me and my bottled Water. I was worried about offending them but I think they understood and well I am glad I went...If anyone is struggling with this I would say just be honest and don't compromise your progress and success. The next hurdle will be when we are the host...the first event will probably be a memorial day cook out so we will light the grill( pureed grilled chicken coming right up...lol) b/c the deep fryer has been retired...lol Well People, just making small talk hope everyone is having a great day...ENJOY!

[adagray 1]

I think once you are past the immediate post-op stages, you will find that social eating/drinking is not as much of an issue as you are imagining. Personally, I feel like I enjoy these social occasions more because I don't have to worry about eating too much and having it 'ruin my diet'. I take it as an opportunity to have some things I don't normally have on a daily basis, but in small quantities. And, since I'm satisfied now w/small quantities, it doesn't feel like deprivation.

[LadyA76 0]

Thanks for the reassurance. After my experience yesterday I felt positive that I really shouldn't be to concerned about it...I'll just carry my "baby" bag is I have too...lol

[fhce13 0]

As the previous responder said, you will find out it's not as big of an issue as time goes on. Most people do not pay attention to what you or others eat at a party. In time you will be able to eat "regular" food in more modest quanities.

[JoJo1 0]

I agree. I worried about this too, but what I found out, is that nobody cares what I am eating. Also, since you are eating slower, people think you are eating as much as they are. It is harder during liquids because you feel like a weirdo. I ate out during liquids and ordered Soup. I was with my husband so I didn't have to worry about him anyway. Those liquid days seem like a long time when you are in them, but afterward. it seems like a very small amount of time. Cheers!!!

[Morgan from OR 0]

I went to a birthday party yesterday.... and the only "strange" looks that I got was when I used a fork and knife to eat my hot dog. (I just giggled and said... hey, its like steak right! I didn't need to explain why I wasn't eating the bun....)

[BetsyB 9]

I understand your concerns, and shared them. But I still go out, and still entertain---and still have fun. I don't always eat everything--but that's not really governed by "can't" as much as it is guided by what my body wants and needs.

It gets easier!

[Bree99 1]

The other posts are spot on. Very soon this worry will fade away. You will be too busy fielding compliments on how you look to fret! You will find that eating out and group events are not such a big deal and that life in general is so much easier!

[outside*looking*in 0]

I actually hosted a cook out/birthday for all of my family and friends over the weekend. Out of the 20 or so people there, only my sister and her boyfriend know about my surgery 2 1/2 months ago. I have lost a total of about 40lbs since the rest of the people have seen me! (20 before surgery). I was not really worried about the food but about the weight loss questions. Turns out - no one said a word about me looking any different. I guess they have seen me go up and down in weight and so far it is not enough to warrent saying anything. I was actually relieved to not talk about it. I just played the hostess, ate fruit and drank some Water and was so busy socializing, no one noticed that I never actually fixed me a plate.

Good Luck:thumbup:

[LadyA76 0]

Thanks for all your input...it really makes me feel better. At least i know it gets easier. One more week of liquids and then I'm on my way to mushies (kinda wish I could skip this phase, not a fan of mushy food at all) but I'll make it work! I survived the broth, I can do anything!!! LOL Have a great Monday!

[marykb 0]

I feel so much better reading that it gets easier. I had my surgery on 4/8 and am attending a pot luck at work tomorrow. I'm bringing my own lunch, cottage cheese, but and concerned about comments anyone might make. I haven't told anyone at work about the surgery. Knowing that other people are able to adjust makes me feel much better. :thumbup:

[JoJo1 0]

I feel so much better reading that it gets easier. I had my surgery on 4/8 and am attending a pot luck at work tomorrow. I'm bringing my own lunch, cottage cheese, but and concerned about comments anyone might make. I haven't told anyone at work about the surgery. Knowing that other people are able to adjust makes me feel much better. :thumbup:

Most of them won't even notice, but if they do just tell them you are on a diet!!! Nothing else needed. They will probably have to give you advice, but the subject is easily changed!!! Hugs.....