Is There A Thing As Too Much Research?

[Spydr 0]

I have been reading these forums for a few months and I am schedlued to be banded on Wednesday the 16th. Here is my question: Have you found that too much reasearch can be a bad thing?

I like having all the input I can but I have found the more I read and study, the more afraid I become. There are always going to be "worst possible cases" but I read about so many on here. I guess if everything was peaches and roses we wouldn't need a support group!

I think I am letting the bad parts of the surgery and life after get to me. I am going through with it but it has caused a great deal of stress and panic in my life since I set the date. The site, in many ways, has become like a car wreck on the highway, you just have to look. I can't not read the bad things because I do need to know them.

I guess there isn't a real point here except maybe we should focus on the positive threads as much as the negative ones. I see lots of victory and encouragement around here and hate that it is overshadowed by the scary stuff.

Perhaps this is what everyone goes through 9 days pre op. If so, sorry, I didn't know. I'll be hanging out over here drinking my last soda!

[dylansmom 27]

I think you answered your own question very well. It's funny that a year out from surgery, I've found that the things I was afraid would happen to me didn't, and the things I wasn't prepared for at all, were the things that happened. LOL (I didn't expect to come down with a viral flu that would develop into Pericarditis *Fluid in sac around my heart* and make my life miserable for 5 whole months.

I thought that I'd have at least 1 fill by now (just can't afford one), and that I'd have lots more weight off by now too, thus more restriction, and eating much less as well.

I guess my point is, even though none of the things that happened to me were band related, I wasn't prepared for them to happen to me. Life is such a gamble no matter how great you live. Anything can happen to anyone at any time. It's just doing the best we possibly can for ourselves on a day to day basis.

I hope that your mind will ease, and that a peace will befall you, and that you'll go into this whole surgery thing with a smile, and come out of it with a smile too.

And yes, it's perfectly normal to have your mind racing in those final few weeks before your surgery. It's what makes us human, and it's what helps us remember our own mere mortality.

I wish you all of my best in these next few weeks, and here's praying that you come out the other side a new and improved you!

All My Best, ~Kelly

[vinesqueen 2]

Hey Spyder, it's called "information overload" and yes, you can research something too much, especially if it is an emotionally charged issue. and WLS is very emotionally charged.

I think everyone is a wreck the week or so before surgery, even if we know it will save our life.

All I can speak for is me. The risks of not having the band were much more scary than any complication from the surgery. I was already heading towards resperatory failure, so a quick death in surgery would be much more preferable to the terrible death of resperatory failure, long and slow, lingering and horrible.

That was me. I don't know what your co-morbidities are, if any. I just know that it was the only solution for me.

[Anwyn 0]

I felt very much like Vines... I was really scared and nervous, but I knew that my back problems would never go away if I didn't lose weight. It really did feel like WLS surgery was my only option. Of course, that doesn't mean I wasn't shakin' in my boots for a week before surgery...

The "scary" threads definitely stick longer in your head, but try to remember that there are hundreds of people on here who have had great experiences. Good luck with your decision!

[Parvathi 2]

I was definitely a wreck before surgery. My two biggest fears were:-

1. What if I get this done & still don't lose? I felt that banding was a last resort and didn't want my hubby and daughter to think I'm a failure.
   
2. What if something goes wrong during surgery?? This one haunted me from the minute I started researching and only got worse as the date got closer. I wrote my daughter a "goodbye" letter just in case. Before surgery, I showed the surgeon and the anesthesiologist pictures of my lil one so they'd know to take good care of me lol.
   

One thing you've got to keep in mind when reading these posts though is, the majority of people who have been successful and hit goal, aren't here posting anymore. They're off living their lives and too busy being thin lol. You'll mostly see people here who are:-

1. Researching, same as you
   
2. Starting their journey
   
3. Middle of the journey
   
4. Having problems with the band and need support
   

I wish you the best of luck on the 16th You'll do fine!

[whippledaddy 5]

First let me state that all the coolest people get banded on November 16th. LOL. That's my bandiversary.

Yes you can research too much. You can think too much. You can worry too much.

Nine days before I was banded I was in a maelstrom of emotions. I was afraid of going under for surgery. I was afraid of complications. I was afraid of problems after surgery.

But it went deeper. I was afraid of saying good bye to food and the act of eating. Such a faithful friend. He had been there for me through many times, both good and bad, but all stressful.

I was afraid of the man I might become. Maybe I would fail, this was a large fear. Go through a life risking surgery and then fail. That one would put knots in my stomach. Or what if I succeeded and it went to my head (I have seen it in others)? What if I became so self involved that I couldn't relate to another person?

I had been fat for forty two years. And I was darn good at it. In a way, I was doing away with the old me, and putting this new frightened baby in my place terrified me.

But.....I was more afraid of dying badly. So many things can take a fat man, in so many unpleasant ways. Diabetes, CHF, Stroke, Heart Attack. As I've said elsewhere: Fat people don't die pretty. And they do it sooner.

So I got more and more nervous, right up until that time that the nurse said "This might make you feel drowsy".

The next thing I knew another nurse was welcoming me to my new life, and said "You did really well." Wow. I did something. Well. In my sleep. Wow.

You see I was afraid of the unknown. Aren't we all? Isn't that part and parcel of being human? But I was, in the end, more afraid of the known.

I wanted to be Ryan, but I didn't want to be the fat Ryan anymore. I was tired. Tired of the people staring. Tired of worrying about spindly chairs. Tired of feeling tired. I had enough fat jokes. Even the funny ones were getting old.

But most of all I was tired of looking in the mirror each day and knowing that the person looking back at me was trying, slowly and systematically, to kill me. I was tired of hating myself for what I was.

Good luck Spyder. I wish the best for you. Just know this: I was banded on November 16, last year. I'm down one hundred pounds, but, no matter what I've lost, I've gained so much more of value. I've gained a life worth living.

I'll be thinking of you as The Day approaches. All will be well. And you can do this!

[piercedqt78 658]

I think that your fears are normal and even healthy. I am sure we all had some fear in the weeks or days before surgery. I just had my 3 month post-op checkup and guess what? I have lost 44 pounds, that's right 44 pounds in just 3 1/2 months. I am wearing clothing that is 3 and 4 whole sizes smaller then I was in July. I tried on the overall shorts that I wore to a 4th of July party and I can put my whole body in one leg now. Was I affraid of surgery? You bet. Am I glad I did it? Yes, Yes, Yes!!! I wish I could scream it from the mountain tops, I LOVE MY BAND!!!!! Like others have said, most of the people here are still in their journey. Those that are at goal are out living life to the fullest. I have even noticed that as I progress, I am here less and less. I love lapbandtalk and the people here are really the greatest you will find, but I have spent a lot of years hiding in my home and sitting in front of a computer, because it did't judge me for being fat. Now I am out walking, enjoying my daughter at the park, and even helping out at the local grade school. Living the life that being fat made impossible. So you get your band, lose your weight and reclaim your life. In the mean time, we are here for support, friendship and a place to vent when you need too. ~Mandy

[seehawksimms 0]

Spydr,

Ryan's letter pretty much sums it up for me. We so afraid to fail again. Afraid to live without eating all we want.

The surgery scared me badly and the closer I got to surgery the more frightened I became. I prayed to the ceiling while they wheeled me into surgery room.

I survived and it is a radical event in my life. I intend to succeed and reading the lapbandtalk site has helped me make that decision and encouragement to go on.

[Spydr 0]

Thanks to all who took the time to share their toughts on the matter. As I approach my first day of liquids, my fear grows a little. I can tell you this, tonight's dinner is going to be great!

I guess it makes sense that people who have found success with the band are out living life to the fullest. I will be joining their ranks soon. I hope I am one of the success stories who can provide hope and support to those in the process. I will hang around a while after goal. Mainly to show off!

Although this can be a scary place sometimes, I will be forever greatful I found the information I have and I hope I can help others in the future. Do I sound like a Miss America contestant or what?!

[DevilMayKare 1]

I wasn't really afraid. Honestly as I sat on the Amtrak traveling to TJ, all by myself with no one knowing, I felt in awe of my bravery or absolute stupidity. Desperation sometimes clarifies the options.

Hey--I'm an insurance agent (auto & home) spend a few hours doing research on car accidents. Guarantee you'll hesitate to get behind the wheel in the morning.

[Danistar 0]

Hi Spydr

I echo what everyone else said. I got a case of nerves and called up about my doc and made sure that he had never had a complaint about him. That eased my mind a lot.

Then every time I read about a complication I would say "Thanks dear God that I won't have any complications. I asked Him to be in the operating room with me and all of the staff and the doctor. Then I began to relax and stop worrying.

We all have the surgery because our lives are unmanageable with the weight and the other medical issues. I sure want to get rid of the Diabetes, sleep Apnea, Asthma, high blood pressure, swollen feet and legs, aches and pains and ad nauseum.

I had my surgery Sept 12t 05 and so far everything has gone very well, just the way it is supposed to. I had my first fill last Monday and am doing great.

I think the thing I worry about most is getting an infection in my port. That's my biggest concern. Everytime I worry I pray about it, and it helps.