Totally devastated

[MrsCabes 2]

Myfeelings have been totally 100% hurt big time just now -

while talking to a girl at work who quite smoking and gained a few pounds just said she lost what she gained and i sad good for you :sad:

then she asked about me i said well the scale hasnt moved in a week and half but i go see the dr next week -

she said - this all seems to be a pain in the ass to go through for nothing... NOTHING ???? 38lbs in 3.5 months is NOT nothing!!!!

I am near tears here:crying: and can not beleive that she has said this to me...

Sure i see people who are the same time out as me or less adn they have lost more,, but ive still lost 38 GOD DAMN POUNDS!!:frown:

Ditto to what everyone else said!

And - don't feel like you "owe" anyone and have to tell them about your surgery. This was/is a personal decision FOR YOU and they don't even need to know. Do we tell everyone when we get tubal ligations or vasectomies? NO - just because they exist, doesn't mean that they have to know!

[smyz64 0]

Hey, Whillow,

I want you to know that I WAS one of those morons. I knew nothing about banding and a friend of mine got it done, and I was stupid and said mean things because she wasn't instantly smaller. Well, eating crow while I wait for my surgery, as it took her 4 months to hit her sweet spot and she looks AMAZING! And I told her so (as I was drooling!). I may have hurt her for a while, but she got me back hard! Just wait for that AHA! moment...it will be so sweet! :frown:

[juliansmom2003 3]

YOU ARE DOING AWESOME, WHILLOW!! Don't let this girl make you feel for one second that you haven't accomplished a HUGE feat! People don't realize how much work it is for us bandsters. They think it's magic and we don't have to work along with it, when in fact, it's much more difficult. Just ignore the ignorant. You have made fabulous progress and it will continue once your mini plateau is over!!

Letting her get to you is not worth your time...just come over here and tell us about it so we can give you all the well deserved kudos and support you need!!!

((HUGS))

[kimwash71112 0]

SHE is just JEALOUS!

[1unknownperson 0]

you see, its because I know people can make insensitive remarks and have higher expectaions for us that I am choosing to not tell anyone.... My feelings get hurt MEGA easy.... ANd I don't feel it is my duty to always be educating everyone I talk to about How/Why banding works or not.... I think you have done fabulous and you have nothing to be ashamed or disappointed in yourself about.... I know we fight to lose every single pound... It is not easy... It is not magic... BUT in the long run, it is WORTH it.... <<Hugs>> From Mama Jen

[Spartan 4]

Abraham Maslow, Mark Twain, Emerson, and many other brilliant people have made the observation that it is important to learn to be "free of the good opinion of other people".

So very true. But so important.

Learn to live your life in such a way that you come to not care a BIT about what people think or say about you. It's not easy, but once you learn to do that you will find that you have an enormous sense of freedom. Your personal sense of value and worth will never be tied to what someone else thinks....only to what YOU have accomplished in your own life.

And the loss of 37 pounds, regardless of how you did it, is indeed an accomplishment, one that you should be quite proud of.

And NO ONE can take that away from you.

[abandnewday 0]

I agree with everyone's post. I want you and everyone else that happens upon this very problem to remember the feeling of joy you had when you weighed yourself and discoverd you lost 37 lbs. That moment, I know comes with elation and a sense of pride in yourself. When times are tough focus on the positives and use them to reinforce your own self-image and self-worth and remember you are WORTH IT!!!! Great job on the 37 lbs. :tongue_smilie:

[fabulous@fifty 1]

Like most of the other banders have said, don't let the remarks and comments from others bother you. You are doing wonderful, so stay focused. I was banded on 2/3/10 and I have decided not to have the "weight loss" conversation everytime I talk to my friends. I've come to the realization that everyone is not as excited about your journey as you are. Take sweety and keep up the GREAT work.

[vballmom 0]

Ok I will be the mean one! I would stash cigarettes all around the office, just to drive her crazy. lol shake it off and keep up the good work. Some people are just clueless!

[New Joy 0]

Last week I was listening to some motivational cds and heard a statement that I was kinda shocked to hear.

Friends and Family will try to sabotage your weight loss efforts.

I thought that was kinda weird...but then I started noticing things and it turns out...that statement is true.

For the most part, people in my life are very supportive.

Skinny people, Fat people, regular every day people. People ask for updates, high fives, or want to know the secret to my success.

One friend tells me every day how much exercising she did the night before and holds me accountable to keep up with her.

My boss is always quick to remove sweets from my eye sight ( even though I have told her I don't crave the junk any more.)

But other people...not so supportive.

It's like everyone has a role to play...and my role is that of a fat person.

I don't see why my dedication to a better lifestyle is intimidating to others...

This one person....she is quick to compare my 35 pound weight loss to her need to lose 3 pounds to fit into her size 0 jeans. She can't just be happy for me....she has to tell me how fat SHE is....every time I see her.

Another girl-- complimented my hair several days. When I told her my hair is the same I had just lost some weight she said oh...she hadn't noticed. When I told her how much...she looked at me with disgust and said...I can't imagine needing to lose 35 pounds.

Even my fat friends are treating me like I deserted them on a island.

Every day, one person comes in with baked sweets and tries to tempt me. When I say-- no thanks-- she gets ticked and acts like I am saying I am too good for that.

Another person criticizes everything I eat...as if I am starving myself or on a fad diet.

It's really weird....but I am not about to stay the way I am to make others feel better about themselves.

[shannybp 0]

Go tell her that she should start smoking again because her new pass time of being a bitch is not very becoming. You are doing great. I didn't lose any weight until I had the band for four months.

[bella71 0]

It sounds like the person you were speaking to is ignorant about how the band works. So, you have two options: 1) educate her; or 2) ignore her and keep your eyes on the prize. You are losing this weight for good. It is much healthier to lose slowly than to go up and down, gaining and losing the same weight. (And I think we have all been down that road before).

Keep doing what you are doing, and keep your head up!

[make33 2]

OMG, so many people don't realize that it takes us three years to lose what gastrics lose in one year! I've only lost 63 pounds in 2 1/2 years and I'm darn proud of every pound! (My surgeon tried to talk me into gastric a week before surgery by saying "You'll lose 100 pounds in no time!"--but invasive? Absolutely! No thank you!) :tongue_smilie:

BB (Before Banding) all the scale could do was to go up, up, up--there WAS no "going down" at all! Believe me, this is the 'hard way' because not only does the Band come with its own rules, but there are some foods we will NEVER be able to eat again. :cool2:

Sounds like someone is getting a little snippy from lack of nicotine, baby! Bet she's back on the cigs soon and guess what? You'll still be losing--the winner!! :laugh:

[sweetbean70 2]

Hello! I feel very fortunate about my journey up to this point because I have not had ANY negative comments. Even when I only lost 4lbs from the beginning of November thru the beginning of January and was feeling bummed about it, my surgeon who was giving me my 5th fill (January) told me to be proud of my loss because he would wager that in all the years past, I would have gained weight during the holiday season. HE WAS SOOOO RIGHT! I started 2010 at my lowest weight in years and I'm really looking forward to ending 2010 weighing even less. :wink2:

I am also very fortunate to have a very dear BF who was banded only 3 weeks after my surgery. We have been able to take this journey together. We are each other's support system, challenge to rise to the occasion, accountability, shoulder to lean on, etc. My mother had gastric bypass (not a good band candidate) right before Thanksgiving. So, we are the THREE WL AMIGOS. I also have a great group of colleagues. They have been extremely supportive and interested in my journey. And last BUT NOT LEAST, my hubby has been my greatest source of support. He likes to joke that going to bed w/ me is like going to bed w/ a different woman each night. When we are snuggling in bed, he swears that he feels changes in my body from the night before. He is so proud of me and tells everyone about my surgery and how much weight I've lost. :laugh:

[texaschic 0]

I am so proud of you.... enjoy every success and know that there is nothing you can not do if you love yourself enough and believe in yourself. God Bless you & keep up the excellent work! :wink2: