Working on the Mental Part of it All?

[Wanjiku 0]

Dear Fellow Bandsters,

I've been at a frustrating plateau for some time now and I'm quite sure it can be attributed to the fact that I'm eating too much (and indulging too often in the wrong things). I know what I *should* be doing and I don't even necessarily find it super hard to do (when I'm doing it), but in analyzing my behavior, it's become clear to me over the past couple of days that what I'm struggling with is the mental piece of this whole thing. I haven't figured out the strategies which will help me make a good eating plan and stick to it, or to say "no" to the temptations that cross my path every day. Perhaps it's self-talk messages I need to develop or some kind of reminders for myself about why I am doing all of this? I don't even seem to have the voice in my head that stops me and says, "are you sure you want to eat that?" when I see a treat in the office breakroom. I just see it, want it, eat it, and then later on think, "whoa - what just happened?" Ditto on quantities I'm eating at meals. Do you all have tips on how you've conquered the mental piece of the equation?

I'd welcome any thoughts or suggestions you all have. Thanks!

[emjay 8]

I'm not sure how long you've been banded, but the first 3-4 months were the hardest part for me. It took some time to get my head in the game and I still waiver occasionally, but I try to keep focused on the goal.

Try to harness your self-indulgence by allowing yourself only 1 treat a day, or completely take yourself out of the equation by not even going into a breakroom and an area where there are treats. Don't keep things you can't have in the house. Hard to do when you have a family, but perhaps put foods you can't have in a specific area.

Take it day by day, minute by minute if you have to. I am currently doing a self-imposed 5-day pouch test to try and break my snacking behavior of late. And it's working. My focus is back and I feel better. Sometimes just a different approach can get you to change your mindset.

The best thing I can tell you to do is take yourself out of the environment when something tempts you. Whether it's in the house, at work, or running errands. Try and remember why you did this and what your goals are, whether it's being feeling better, getting stronger, losing weight, resolving medical issues. Try and put down exactly all the reasons you did this and why it's important to you.

It's hard, I'm not going to lie to you. But it does seem to get better. Please remember that you have a bunch of people on here willing to help you however they can. This forum is a great source of support. But if you also have a support group in the area, please check it out. It does help to talk to people face to face who "get it".

[4my4kids 1]

Just a question "What is a 5 day pouch test?" Ive heard others talk about it but dont know what it is?

[emjay 8]

Go to www.5daypouchtest.com. You don't have to buy anything, the principles of it on on their website. I basically cut and pasted a cheat sheet to stick in my purse. It has helped me alot break the cycle of snacking.

[DizzyLizzy 21]

This can be very mentally challenging. I've already had my meltdown. The most frustrating part for me is seeing how well everyone else is doing, esp when you're not doing so well, double esp when you think you're doing everything right or the best you can!

You just have to take it day by day and realize that everyone is different, so you really can't compare yourself to others. For instance, I didn't lose much, but all of a sudden the week before last I lost 6 lbs in one week! I didn't change my calorie intake or up my workout, I went on same as I was and all of a sudden it seemed my body gave up the fight in holding on to these pounds. I don't know why, but everybody's body is different!

I know how hard the temptation is. I've never been a big sweet eater, but since being banded, it seems the jar full of chocolate minis in the office is calling my name. And I've answered a few times!!! Just had to pick myself up and move on...try harder the next time!

Keep your head up, if you slip up, start over and move on. That's all you really can do! Good luck!

[LeighaMason 19]

OK I am going to ask the ever present question, Do you need a fill? I plateaued last week and then when I started journaling I realized that I was eating too much. So I scheduled an appointment for a fill, when I went today I told them I just needed a little because I had been having good restriction until last week. But once under the floro, I needed .7 to get good restriction. I didn't realize how much it had worn off! I was thinking I needed .25 or so.

Oh and I know what you mean when you eat without even being conscious of it. I had a head cold Monday so I went to the store and got medicine. ($11, thank you very much.) Came home, opened the package, took out the horse sized pill and was about to put it in my mouth when my brain finally took over and screamed "DON'T TAKE THAT!". Hello? Where was my brain when I was paying $11 for it at the store? Same thing with grazing, if I catch myself before I have swallowed it, I spit it in the trash. Not very ladylike but effective. (Do you think its muscle memory?) Its all a matter of time and training. Keep at it. Dont give up. Start again now. You can do it.:confused:

[HeatherR 0]

I too am a spitter!! There is constantly treats at work & I always struggle with avoiding them. Even though I am just starting to scratch the surface of the mental part of being banded I have found my own little way of dealing with it.

First of all, store bought treats are MUCH easier to avoid. They simply don't taste as good as something homemade! The problem is when someone brings in homemade treats. Instead of drooling & fighting with myself until I can run out the door at the end of the day I take a bite. If it is completely irresistible I eat it and enjoy it. If it's just ok I ask myself if it's worth the calories. It hardley ever is & I spit it out & throw the rest away. It takes away the craving because I tried it.

Good luck!

[bambam 0]

Wanjiku-

Honestly - I think the mental aspect of this is the hardest. I had my last fill in Nov and lost 8.5 pounds since that time. For me that was slow weight loss - it was the holidays, my job has been very stressful, anniversary of my mother's death, etc., and I'm a stress eater. I am grateful I lost at all, because I ate more than usual over the holidays, and had sweets which I don't do much of. I feel I have good restriction, but I was making poorer choices than previously, exercising less with the bad winter here, and my Water intake was very little. My husband has been off work with an injury and we had a lot of food around the house that we normally don't have, and I found myself grabbing those in the last few weeks when I had head hunger.

I had to go for a 3-month followup this week. I didn't get a fill - feel I have good restriction for now, but it kind of gave me a fresh start. I'm taking back control. I've increased my Water, quit the snacking (was eating out of stress and head hunger) and already the scale is moving. None of us are perfect, we'll all have times where the head part of this is going to slow us down, but that doesn't mean it has to stop you in your tracks forever.

I track all my food, water, and exercise on dailyplate first thing in the morning and if I haven't entered it, I don't eat it (unless we end up going out or our plans change). Every bite I eat is documented. I know I've met my Protein goals and kept my calories in check that way. It's also a great way to see even small amounts of exercise add up.

You just have to remind yourself you are worth it - those foods that are tempting will still be around in a day, a week, or a month. I used to eat BBQ potato chips like they were the last bag in the world :confused: Now once in a great while I may have 4.... and I have to wonder what the big deal was! I've discovered it's not so much the foods that I miss - I can have most things if I TRULY want them, but the gorging that comforted me in some odd way. So happy to be where I am now. My relationship with food is not perfect... but a work in progress.

Good luck!

Edited February 19, 2010 by bambam

[Grandma26 1]

I have read this many times on LBT and I try to keep repeating it during the times when I can't go on another minute without some kind of comfort food; "Nothing tastes as good as being thin feels".

We will always be head hungry, lets face it even skinny people fight that urge. I take it day by day and it does get easier. Now if I am miserable and can't stand it anymore, one bite of something changes my mood completely and puts me back on track. Stay strong and reach out to this forum for strength!

[kirafiki 0]

I have spent the last six months just hovering at the same weight. At first, I was angry that the scale wasn't moving, and then I got real with myself and realized it was because I was getting out more... dating, having dinners out, wine here and there. It wasn't until the other day that I realized that even though I haven't lost anything, I haven't gained. I managed to maintain for six months, with very little restriction. More importantly, the last six months were important for the head work I had been neglecting. I am starting to see my body for what it is now, and not what it was before. My head has begun to accept that I am nearly half the person I was, in volume, but I am easliy twice the person I was emotionally. Going in for a second fill next Monday... the conservative one I got two weeks ago wasn't enough.

The bottom line is I needed that time to work through some of the head things. I apologize for not having any tips, since the process was so organic and I didn't realize it was happening at the time. Good luck with finding peace with the head stuff... I am not there yet, but am on my way!

[waynooo 1]

I think the mental part is the hardest aspect of weight loss. I am not yet banded but hope to be with in a couple of months. One thing I noticed with my self was I was giving myself permision to over eat. Even if I wasnt planning to diet, I would look at teh food or the third or fourth portion and say "I'll just start tomorrow". When I caught myself giving me the permision statement I just kinda sat back and thought what the heck! So I now know my permision statement and can identify when I use it. Hope this helps in your road to recovery, yes recovery, I think we can all agree that we have an addiction to food. Best of luck, Waynooo

:sad:

[Band_Groupie 3]

I've been blogging my way through the 'head stuff' more than anything else! It does get easier with restriction, but I've learned the most important thing is just to be as AWARE as you can. I can't tell you how much that one little word has helped me. It does take awhile, because we have had years of experience eating blindly and without a thought, but you'll get there one change at a time. Personally, I started with one question 'Am I hungry?'

[mjbf 0]

I had my 2nd fill and finally have restriction now. When I am full and I can't eat another bite, it actually MAKES ME MAD! I look at the food and I want it! I am trying to work through this. My surgery was 7 wks. ago. So I know what you're going through! I've told myself to take it 1 MEAL AT A TIME.

Good luck to you and if you have any tips, please let me know !