Negative Reactions...from other WLS patients???

[ChicagoWinter 0]

Hi everyone. Now that I have had my LAP-BAND® surgery I have run into a few negative people...some of which had WLS themselves. However, the people that have given me a hard time (whether in-person or on discussion boards) have had surgeries OTHER than LAP-BAND® (Gastric bypass, RNY, etc). Have any of you experienced this, also? Before I found Lap Band Talk I was on a different board and to be honest, it seemed very negative towards LAP-BAND® patients. Is this common? There seemed to be a lot of "my surgery is better than yours". I had assumed that most WLS patients would be suportive of each other...regardless of the method that worked for them. To be honest, it really made me start to second-guess my choice...even though I am thrilled that I got banded.

[illuminationlady 7]

I have heard of this happening at support group meetings where both types of surgeries are attending. At my support group meetings there are both types but we support each other. I found it weird that you wouldn't support each other. Strange people out there....

[kirafiki 0]

Unfortunately, this is very common. I have tried to analyze it, because that is what I do. The only explanation I have come up with is that there is some level of jealousy... especially when we are very successful. I think (maybe, just a guess here) that some other WLS patients were told that they have the most successful weight loss results, and when those of us who do as well or better than they were told banded patients do they feel as though its not fair that they re-routed their gastrointestinal tract to get the same results we do without having changed our anatomy is such a drastic way. Just my guess though. I have a dear friend who had bypass, did really well, and has been nothing but supportive of me, and I of her. When it comes down to it, I really have no idea why they are like that. I just try to focus on myself, and know that I did the right thing for me and they did the right thing for them.

[untfluter 3]

I have a friend, or rather had a friend, who had bypass several years ago. When I told her last year, like March, that I was doing the lap band, she basically started asking me if I was sure that the band was right for me and basically telling me that I should be using her surgeon, etc... I have never heard from her again...I have called her, texted her and emailed her and she has never responded. The sad thing is a little over a year before that I had gone to visit her in Chicago for my birthday after SHE begged ME to come visit her. You would have thought that she would have been more supportive of me considering that she had had WLS herself... oh well, guess she wasn't the friend I thought she was... and if that's the case, I am better off w/out her..

Hi everyone. Now that I have had my LAP-BAND®® surgery I have run into a few negative people...some of which had WLS themselves. However, the people that have given me a hard time (whether in-person or on discussion boards) have had surgeries OTHER than LAP-BAND®® (Gastric bypass, RNY, etc). Have any of you experienced this, also? Before I found Lap Band Talk I was on a different board and to be honest, it seemed very negative towards LAP-BAND®® patients. Is this common? There seemed to be a lot of "my surgery is better than yours". I had assumed that most WLS patients would be suportive of each other...regardless of the method that worked for them. To be honest, it really made me start to second-guess my choice...even though I am thrilled that I got banded.

[howdybooth 4]

Here’s what I’ve found to be the case……some surgeons don’t want to do the lap band procedure because of the follow up maintenance…..i.e.: fills. So they are encouraging their patients to have the more aggressive forms of WLS – plus they make more money! So how do you convince someone to do one surgery over the other…….by telling them that they will lose their weight faster and be healthier sooner! But when you look 5 years down the road – weight loss is the same.

Just smile and say you are so glad theirs is working for them and very happy how well yours is working for you.

[emjay 8]

My theory as to why people who have had other types of WLS are unsupportive is that they probably don't want to feel like their decision to have the type of surgery they did was perhaps the wrong choice. After all the information people sift through to make a decision on the type of surgery to have, they don't want to be made to feel like their choice may have been incorrect.

I know it sounds odd, but when they have had success with 1 type - that seems to be the one that they will say works the best. Not necessarily true, it just worked for them. Let's face it, there are different types of WLS for different types of situations. If I had been honest, gastric bypass would have been probably the most logical choice for me given the type of eater I was, BUT, that being said, one thing that the Lap Band has done for me is CHANGE the way I eat and what I eat...something that gastric bypass may not have done.

With gastric bypass, I don't think I would have changed my eating habits after the "honeymoon" period of being able to lose weight effortlessly and would have piled it right back on. I feel with the Lap Band, it has changed the way I eat, what I eat, and how I eat in a positive way. Will I stray from time to time, oh yes, I'm sure. That's my nature. And when I have, I've been able to reign it in, I don't gain as much as I would have without it, and I'm able to jump right back following the band rules immediately.

I'm only 10 months out, still a relative newbie, but the Lap Band has taught me many things that the physicians and the literature don't tell you. They don't tell you that the band will change your mindset, but in my case, it was the tool that has allowed me to eat anything in moderation and be satisfied, and by being able to do that, has helped me overcome many of my food issues.

All types of WLS have their purpose. It's just figuring out which one is right for you.

[carmen74 10]

my bf had the bypass done a few years ago and when i talk about the band he just brushes me off...with his surgery he didn't have to do ANYTHING i had to. he went to a seminar, found a surgeon, scheduled the surgery, the night before a Fleet "flush", and the morning of he had bloodwork done. THAT'S IT. when i talk about all the stuff i had/have to do he says that my doctor must be "scamming" me because it is "ridiculous" that i have to do all that "stuff" lol

i guess that is why he's gained back 75lbs, because he didn't do that "stuff"!!

[SoccerMomma73 1,867]

I had to attend 1 pre-op support group meeting. The meetings at my hospital are combined, with band, bypass, etc. I felt like the entire meeting was spent with the bypass group telling us how much better their surgery was and how we were wasting our money getting a lap band. I too don't understand, I would think that as obese people seeking a healthier lifestyle we'd support eachother, no matter which direction we choose, apparently that ain't the case!

Good luck to all of you, keep up the good work!

[Cocoabean 430]

I have seen it with some people on other boards. Not will all the posters, just some.

So many say, "Oh the after care with the band is horrible!! All those doctor visits..it is never ending. DON'T DO IT!"

Oh, really??? I've had 4 fills in two years. Yeah, horrible. Way too many doctor's visits.

[Fanny Adams 7]

My theory as to why people who have had other types of WLS are unsupportive is that they probably don't want to feel like their decision to have the type of surgery they did was perhaps the wrong choice. After all the information people sift through to make a decision on the type of surgery to have, they don't want to be made to feel like their choice may have been incorrect.

I think you've hit the nail on the head with this and this is my theory also. Surgery of any kind is generally a big decision for a person and comes with a lot of emotional attachments. People want to believe that they have made the right choice for themselves and, for many, supporting someone in having chosen a different type of surgery is tantamount to admitting that their own choice wasn't right.

To be honest, I feel the same about lapband surgery and the alternatives. While I might try to be supportive of someone's decision to have gastric bypass or the DS, deep down inside, I know that I would believe that they have chosen a dangerous and unnecessarily drastic option. I know that what I "should" be saying is "lapband was the right choice for me, you make whatever is the right choice for you" but what I'd really be thinking is "OMG, don't do it!!" if they said they were having the bypass or even the vertical sleeve.

[Diamondgirl81 0]

I've encountered the same negativity, especially at my first support group meeting. There were a few lap band patients that reinforced the negative criticism of the band by saying that it didn't work and was a waste of time. But what these banded bashers didn't fess up to, was their total lack of commitment and poor food/exercise choices. That, I found out, after talking to them, one-on-one. One person was so upset w/ their band only after 6 months, that they were considering the sleeve. However, when I spoke to them personally, they admitted to eating around the band, not exercising, not food journaling, and drinking excessively. Where's the personal responsibility?? I say, to each his own. Find what works for you and rock it out.

Best,

Lauren