Regret Telling Friends ...

[Floridacocoon 0]

Help! I don't know how to start a new thread on this or I would. Can you? I'd love to hear more from people about head vs. body hunger ...

[arthukd 1]

FL

Go to Post-Operation Lap-Band Surgery Q&A and click on the blue button on the left hand side of the page around the "search lapbandtalk.com" feature and it will open up a new post. Title it head hunger v. real hunger or what ever you think will catch the most attention. Then people who are interested in that topic will read and respond. PLUS I think you will get better results on the Post Op forum b/c most of the people reading have already been banded and you can get their opinions on how it affected them. I was going to start the thread for you, but it would be better if you did so you can be the Original Poster.

[esam5 0]

If they continue to try and discredit your decision I would ask them "If I needed a pace maker would you tell me not to have the surgery?" Or "If I need Chemo would you tell me to use a natural cure?" They probably would not. Also if you really feel the children are being malnurished you need to take action. A few years ago in MA a child died of starvation because the mother (member of a cult) insisted the child only Br##stfeed.

yes, be careful of the kid issue, here in Scottsdale a mother starved her kids because she didn't want them to be overweight and one died ( drastic vegan diet) it was horrifying!!!!!

Kids should be loved, cherished, and nurtured!! and for the love of Pete, FED!!!!!!!!

(I'm a big proponent of nursing, believe in it wholeheartedly, but not to the point of harming my child!!!! Who ARE these people?!?!?!!!!!

anyway.....

(my 2 cents)

[ctinch 1]

I can totally relate to this. Now that people know alot of them are like that is the only reason I lost weight! I just want to scream at them and say yes it helped but if I hadn't made any effort whatsoever I doubt I would be down 169lbs!

[mizvicky 14]

So sorry this happened to you. Your friends don't get it. They are not in the club. If they have never been mor than 50 lbs over weight they are not in the club. If they have never had someone blatantly look them up and down in public, they are not in the club. If they have never had to be sure to ask for a table in a retaurant because they probably won't fit in a booth they are not in the club. If they have never been in pain just from walking up a flight of stairs they are not in the club. if they have never lost 50 or more lbs only to gain it back again and again and again they are not in the club. If they are not in the club they don't get a vote. They may mean well, but like I said, they just don't get it. Good for you for doing something good for yourself. I am in the club and I salute you and wish all the best.

[difa 114]

WOW her kids are on a gluten free' date=' lacto-free, vegetarian diet? Wow, I would consider that child neglect in some form. Malnution is so easy with adults... Kids I am sure can be stunted in their development with such a diet. Maybe your friend needs an damn intervention! You sound sane to me =).[/quote']

Now now don't judge her. We cant complain about others judging us but then judge them. Not fair.

[cfurrey 53]

EVERYONE I TOLD HAS BEEN INCREDIBLY SUPPORTIVE OF MY DICISIONS. SOME DIDNT EVEN THINK I WAS AS BIG AS I ACTUALLY AM. I HOLD MY WEIGHT WELL. BUT TO THOSE WHO HAD DOUBTS ONCE THEY KNEW THE REASONING BEHIND THE BANDING THEY WERE ALL IN. AS I HAVE SOME HEALTH ISSUES THAT TAKE A MAJOR TOLL ON ME. IM NOT PICKY WHO KNOWS AND WHO DONT. EVENTUALLY EVERYONE WILL KNOW AND IM NOT AT ALL ASHAMED OF MY BAND OR THAT ITS MY LAST CHOICE. NOT SAYING ANY OF YOU ARE ASHAMED I KNOW ITS NOT LIKLY THE CASE AT ALL. I UNDERSTAND NOT WANTING TO TELL PPL I DEBATED IT FOR ALONG TIME. BUT I KNEW NO MATTER WHAT ONCE I TOLD ONE PERSON ITLL EVENTUALLY GET AROUND LOL... I HOPE AND ENCOURAGE YOU TO FIND THE SUPPORT YOU NEED TO BACK YOU DURING YOUR JOURNEY. THIS WEBSITE HAS HELPED ME JUST AS MUSH AS MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY... I LOVE THIS SITE AND WHEN YOU EVER NEED A PICK ME UP COME FIND ME ILL SUPPORT ANYONE THAT IS IN NEED... `

[OldMomOf3 52]

Ouch! I'm so sorry they said that to you. I think I'd say something to them. I'd say, "I am so lucky to have wonderful supportive friends like you and I know you love me so much. I know you want to see me healthy and so I need you to know that my doctor and I have thoroughly researched this and it is what is best for me. As my dear friends I'm sure your intentions are good and you didn't realize that your words were hurtful to me so I want to let you know that I cherish your support and I look forward to you sharing this journey with me as full supporters. This will be very difficult and I really need encouragers and I need you to not say anything negative to me or about me."

I don't know....I just always try to assume the best of people and be as direct as possible. Sometimes it is uncomfortable,but usually turns out okay.

Whatever ends up happening, sure hope it goes well and your friends "get it."

[Kdubb 1]

I can relate to what your going through. It seems when you tell people that you are doing this there are three types of replies: 1. Supportive 2: dont really care or 3: unsupportive, and automatically they are nutrionists, dieticians, and have the secrets to getting thinner.

And these people are usually the skinniets people, or people that don't struggle with weight loss. Your true friends are the ones that can look you in the eye and say they love you the way you are but support you in making the changes that will make you happy.