Accused of Taking easy Way out!!!

[Mary Ash 16]

One of my friends who I thought was going to be pretty supportive of my banding is really starting to get to me. They have mentioned before surgery that they really didn't think I needed to go to these extreme measures. Now after surgery this friend mentioned to me that I could have lost my weight naturally and that plenty of other people do it all of the time.

I then asked him if he personally knew of any people that were able to lose more then 200 pounds naturally and keep the weight off. Of course he said now but that there are people that do it. I told him that was rare and that I personally needed the lap band as a tool. He said he understands this but that I still could have done it without surgery if I had just TRIED.

This really set me off because I have ALWAYS been overweight, since before kindergarten at least, and God knows I have been TRYING to lose weight for as long as I can remember. I just feel like he was not listening to me and could not see that this was the BEST choice I have ever made for myself.

I am a little bit upset because I counted this person as one of my best friends and I would have loved to have had their support during this time. I can't believe being banded is going to change our friendship but it looks like it just may...

[liliax3 0]

Some people are just ignorant and stubborn. He's obviously not very educated in weight loss, most people who diet and exercise to lose weight gain it back within the next two years. I had a couple of friends that did not understand why I would be willing to go through surgery too. I just told them that the Lap-band® is a tool to weightloss, it's not a solution, we still have to work to lose weight. If he's a good friend you should explain everything to him and hopefully he'll understand better. good luck :]

[Minnesotalady 1]

Hi, hope everything s going good for you. getting the band is the best thing that i have done for myself, and I am almost positive you will be saying that as well as long as you know how to use your newly found tool. As for you friend or so called friend, obviously has no clue how hard it is to lose weight. I give you lots of credit for realizing you have a weight problem and that you want to get healthy for yourself. Do this for YOU, no one else... wishing you lots of success

[cymone_tx92 0]

I totally understand what your going through, i have been over weight all my life i've tried losing the weight on my own but, gained all the weight back. I only told 1 of my friends about me getting the band and she supported me in it. If i where you i would sit down with that friend and tell him everything the band is suppose to do, and if he still can't support you then most likely he is not a good friend if he can't support you in something that you think is best for you !

[LeighaMason 19]

Strangely, weightloss can be very threatening to friends, significant others and family. Sometimes they are afraid they are going to lose you. That you will change on the inside like you are on the outside. Reasurrance is in order. I am very happy for you to be taking this step, I was obese during my 20's and 30's. Good luck to all of you........

[MrsLadyHawk 5]

I totally agree with LeighaMason. And I am having a similar time as you.

My best friend has been backing me for the past year in trying to get approved, but now that it's actually going to happen, she's been totally different. She's been telling me that if I want a running partner, then she'd go with me. I haven't even mentioned to her anything about what I do to excercise. She has been very critical of things that I eat and tells me that I should not be wearing tank tops and such in public. These things really hurt me and I was very confused. I talked to someone else that they said that she had told them that she was afraid I was going to change and I wouldn't be her friend anymore.

We talked and everything's cool now with us. Maybe you could just try talking to your friend.

[Mary Ash 16]

I was just looking back at this post and thinking about the past year I don't think that it was necessary to tell as many people as a chose to tell. It made it easier in some aspects but I also know that people will and do always judge. It really did just get hard to keep it a secret from some of my friends who I spend a ton of time with.

[L12 13]

I'm sorry your friend is being a jerk! Those kind of comments bothered me at first too, but since I've reached my goal it's easier to shrug them off. I'm so much healthier, I have no more foot/knee/ankle pain, I'm more attractive, and I am now physically able to lead a very active lifestyle. Once you reach this place, it doesn't matter how you got there--chances are you'll be even better off than some of your unbanded friends. No one looks at me now and wrinkles their nose about the surgery; they just see a thin, healthy person. You'll get there too!