dating, dinner and the band

[pamela 10]

Hello All,

1st, my pneumonia is getting better, slowly but surely...let's hope I'm better by next week.

My question is: I was just asked out on a date for next week and this guy does not yet know I have been banded. I, of course, am still eating mushies and he wants to go to dinner. I'm thinking I can order Soup or something, but I'm trying to decide whether or not to tell him that I have the band. What if he keeps insisting that I order something else, or asks me if I want a taste of his food!?

I don't want to be the girl in the SEINFELD episode that doesn't want to taste the apple pie and just sits there shaking her head like a crazy person!!! LOL!!!

~Pamela.

[Tropicana 0]

Hello All,

1st, my pneumonia is getting better, slowly but surely...let's hope I'm better by next week.

My question is: I was just asked out on a date for next week and this guy does not yet know I have been banded. I, of course, am still eating mushies and he wants to go to dinner. I'm thinking I can order Soup or something, but I'm trying to decide whether or not to tell him that I have the band. What if he keeps insisting that I order something else, or asks me if I want a taste of his food!?

I don't want to be the girl in the SEINFELD episode that doesn't want to taste the apple pie and just sits there shaking her head like a crazy person!!! LOL!!!

~Pamela.

Dilemma! When are you off mushies? Is there anyway to postpone the date?

[giveyouthemoon 4]

Okay, there are MANY ways you can spin this. No, you don't have to tell him you are banded. Hell, you don't have to tell anyone...ever. It's YOUR choice.

Now...as to the mushies.....yes, go and try to order Soup or something soft. I suggest saying "gosh, so sorry, my tummy was upset earlier so don't be offended if I eat sort of light tonight" then giggle beautifully and touch his arm and smile.

Or.....say "gosh, I'm just not that hungry today. I think I'll have soup"

or a million other ideas. Just have what you are going to say in mind so you are ready.

And enjoy your date. I haven't had a date since my very serious boyfriend broke up with me a year and a half ago....so I'm jealous and HAPPY for you!!!

[theresa2mum 0]

Hi

Congrats on the date! I'm on mushies atm and went out with some friends the other night...first time out since banded...well they must have picked the only place in town that doesn't have Soup on the menu. That's the downside of not telling everyone.

Hint: check out where you're going first lol.

[Jachut 487]

Personally I'd say you had a tummy bug last week and are still not eating properly or something like that, so he cant cajole you and try to convince you to eat more as people tend to do when they want to pig out and feel embarrassed because you wont join them.

Well actually, I'd just say I had a lap band really, but if you didnt want to tell him that, that's what you could say.

[kimalicious 5]

Everywhere has some sort of Soup and baked potatoes or some sort of potatoes. If he is pushy about you trying food then he doesn't sound like a winner anyways. I'm sure it will go great, If you are far enough into your mushie stage you should even be fine eating salad and chips if you chew them enough. I was wide open 2 weeks out. So let us know how it goes after the date and give us the scoop on this guy, I am nosey!

Kim

["with the band" 1]

Any type of soft food from the menu could be ordered. Such as mashed potatoes, gravy. What about a lasagna or spaghetti and cutting it up real small.

How bout - A sore tooth. Don't really want to chew anything till you can get to the dentist. Thus your need to eat soft foods. Brilliant - he'll never suspect anything.

Take care - Nancy

[vinesqueen 2]

Personally, I would just tell him. But that's just me I suppose. If you don't want to tell, that's fine, but I suppose you will have to tell at one point or another. It isn't like it's a secret that you're fat, so I don't see why it should be a secret that you are taking charge of your life.

Of course, you can always tell him that you are recovering and your tummy is dellicate right now. I would NOT LIE. It will not turn out well.

[dcox20 0]

Mydoc gave me a laminated card that says something like... "The holder of this card has recently undergone stomach suregery and is on a modified diet - please allow him/her to order from the children's or seniors menu. Additionally please be willing to blend any food they request as it eases the digestion process"

and on the back is the doctors name & contact info...

I'll be using that when we go out tonight.

[jillrn 0]

I would be honest about it too--or at least not lie. If you are honest and he doesnt want to further the relationship b/c of the band well.. then obviously he is not Mr Right. But if you dont say anything eventually you will have to come clean and then you look like you were the one hiding stuff. Honesty is truely the best policy. But if you really dont want to tell him then I would just not say anything--order Soup ( make sure you try something like that at home first) eat and talk, if he asks if you want to share a dessert say no thank you. If he brings something up about it you could say " I love soup-- What is your favorite food? or some other question. Try to keep the focas on him people love to tell you about their lives most people will talk all night about themselves. Real ego booster for men too! Good luck let us know how it goes

[pamela 10]

Now...as to the mushies.....yes, go and try to order Soup or something soft. I suggest saying "gosh, so sorry, my tummy was upset earlier so don't be offended if I eat sort of light tonight" then giggle beautifully and touch his arm and smile.

I love it! Good idea! LOL