My wife's having lapband Friday

[creamerwc 0]

My wife's having the LAP-BAND® procedure done this Friday and I wanted to see if there are any other men on here whose wives or significant others have had this done. I'm very excited at the prospects of her losing weight, her all around health getting better and most of all I'm looking forward to seeing my wife truly happy about her looks again and to feel better about herself. Now for my apprehensions....I'm a little nervous about her having the surgery because there is some risk as with all surgeries. Also, I know that I will be her main support since we are best friends. I'm just afraid I may not be good enough at helping her although this is pretty much a baseless fear.

Other men out there, what's been hard about this and/or what are the things you thought would be hard that aren't hard to deal with at all? My wife means the world to me so I want to be prepared for any upcoming difficulties some others on this forum have learned and grown through. I appreciate your input.

Thanks,

Chase

[dkt1971 0]

Chase, She is a lucky woman to have you! My husband is very supportive and I'm sure you;ll do just fine. Good luck to you and you wife. I was banded on Dec. 18th. and I'm doing great.

[creamerwc 0]

Thank you for your encouraging words and I'm glad things are going great for you I think I should be lots better after Friday and I have found that it's usually the periods leading up to a major change that are the worst.

[Bermuda 0]

My husband is afraid of the surgery I am going to have but I felt great when he told me that I should do what I want to do. He also said he thinks I look great the way I am and physically he wouldn't care if I was heavy or thin. That went a long way with me. Dont worry and just be yourself and get her everything she asks for. Dont forget to clean the house and get your own meals and she will be thrilled!

[Spaz80 0]

You are a very loving and caring husband to support your wife in her decision. Yesterday at my consultation mine asked what he could do to help me and was told that being supportative was a good start. But to Celebrate the all the victories especially the ones that don't relate to the scale. One of the things I'm looking forward to is being comfortable in stadium seats again, we go to a lot of baseball games and the seats are so small for me. When I finally fit comfortably and don't have to get up every inning to stretch that will be a victory, something to celebrate. The best thing I can is be open with her and talk with her. Communication is a great tool. Good luck to her tomorrow and you as you take the journey together.

[happy2lose 0]

Chase,

My husband is very supportive of my new banded lifestyle. I can share with you the ways in which his support has helped me the most.

1. He encourages me to exercise by exercising with me. We love to ride bikes together. TOGETHER being what helps me the most.

2. He eats the same healthy foods that I eat so I don't have to prepare separate meals for he or I.

3. He has stopped eating off of my plate. This was a big one because he eats really fast and when he eats off of my plate I tend to rush my eating and end up stuck.

4. He is understanding that I cannot have junk food in the house. Therefore he avoids junk food.< /p>

5. He doesn't complain when I buy new clothes. He gets excited when I go down a size and supports my $$ spending even though money is tight because he realizes that I need to feel good about myself.

6. He listens to my endless rambling about my band experiences and expresses an interest.

7. He did not expect me to prepare meals for him during the post-op liquids & mushie foods stages.

I hope this helps you out and please know that I admire you for being so loving and caring of your wife.

Donna

[happy2lose 0]

I also wanted to put your mind at ease in regards to the surgery. It is a very short simple procedure lasting only about 30 minutes. Although going under anesthesia is always a risk and being obese increases that risk, my surgeon who has performed over 3,000 WLS has never lost a patient.

[necrea6758 0]

I love you baby and thank you for joining on here with me and taking the time to learn and listen as much as you can. I can't wait to feel better! xoxo

[necrea6758 0]

I love this husband of mine and for all he does for me. We have been married for 11+ yrs now and have had our ups and downs but he is always there for me when I need him. Thank you Chase..just a few more hours then I will start my new life! :thumbup::thumbup:

[happy2lose 0]

You are very fortunate to have somebody looking forward to supporting you through your journey. This will make a huge difference for you on your journey.

Congratulations! I'm sure you will be successful at reaching your goal weight.

[necrea6758 0]

Thank you very much! We are here in Las Vegas alone and all our family is back east so we have to hold each other up. He is great at that! I am nervous and excited all rolled into one.

[skinnyjeans 2]

Chase,

My wife asked me to respond to your post. I understand how you feel. My wife is also my bestfriend and knowing that something could happen to her makes me uneasy. We are to protect them.

Stay by her side. We went together to the initial question and answer. My wife did LOTS of research. I knew she had found the right Dr to do the job.

I would like to share one short story before ours. She had a friend that did the procedure afterward and could not ever seem to loose weight. We went out with her and her husband only to see him order all this food. I was thinking, "WOW, how could anyone say no?", and she didn't.

I had to change things as well. I had to change the things I eat. I am not overweight , although I do have the mid-life belly. There are time I have to remind her that she has had enough. Old habits are hard to break. We all need reminders.

Many times when we go out to eat we will share. This puts both of us in better portions.

There have been times during intercourse that things are uncomfortable for her because I am on her port, LOL, just readjust and go on. You'll learn to communicate that out.

Remind her to eat S-L-O-W. Chew everything well. She will learn this as well. Stop the sodas. We were fortunate that we never really drank a lot of those.

Hmm, That's all I can think of right now. It was given to me unexpected. If you have any questions, just ask skinny jeans and I will be glad to answer.

Number one thing, Keep supporting her, love her more (even though there is less to love), and remind her.

Skinny Jeans Husband

[necrea6758 0]

Thank you so much for posting this for him. He has been pretty much alone in this except for me and since I am the one going through it it is very hard for him to understand how I feel. So glad your wife asked you to reply!

Nancy :thumbup:

[Spaz80 0]

Skinnyjeans husband you are an awesome supporter. My DH has already said he will do what he needs to so we are both comfortable including sharing meals. He came with me to the initial question and answer and has asked to go to anything else he can so he can better understand what I will be going through. I'm glad we have all found such wonderful supporters and husbands.

[creamerwc 0]

Thanks skinny jean's husband for your advice and thanks to all who have replied back.

I definitely agree that this isn't only a lifestyle change for Nancy but for me as well. I cannot continue with eating the way I normally do after she has this done and besides, I too have the mid-life belly that I've needed to get rid of.

I will be posting again very soon after tomorrow's procedure and thanks again :thumbup:

Edited January 8, 2010 by creamerwc