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ok. well if that is what u want, then so be it. we all have our reasons for what we want, which may or mat not be understood by others. that's life, as they say! with that said, to gain 130lbs (from ur current weight of 130 to your goal of 260) will likely take a considerable amount of effort to gain HEALTHILY. i would suggest working with a professional to form a plan to gain this amount of weight while maintaining a relatively good level of "health". there is also the "easy" way to gain weight, by just eating low-volume, high-calorie foods. think: all thinks considered "junk": fast food, candy, dessert, fatty foods, liquid calories (pop, juice, alcohol) etc. you may be compromising your health and longevity, but i mean if a higher weight is what YOU want, then go for it. you know yourself best. good luck!

I used to fall asleep after drinking alcohol! I guess it doesn't happen now that I'm older.

it may also be your screen time (i mean you are posting this at 1am!)...you can try to stay off the phone/computer/tv for a couple hours before your intended bedtime. it may help.... good luck! p.s. alcohol always puts ME to sleep. ymmv. lol

Lemme see here....what order to roll with....I'll start with the No-Can-Do List. Gonna sound cornball...but then again....cornball is my wheelhouse, lol. Okay...here is the Top 5 that come to mind over my morning coffee: skydiving. hell to the NO. Added to that anything that involves heights. It wouldn't be cool for them to see me pass out from terror......although I did have a great conversation with a gal yesterday afternoon who has professional live saving medical skillz. So....she could probably take me to death's door....and bring me back. But no planes, roller coasters, wall climbing or the like. Wind tunnel is about the best I can consider.... Years ago she took me out for margaritas...took my arse out. We found solace as two souls in marriages that were struggling, no sharks. I grew up near the coast...snorkeling and scuba diving frequently.... continued it through college. At some point in my mid-20's I began to have sinus troubles equalizing the pressure when diving...made for painful surface intervals between dives. My Uncle had been through the same a few years prior. He tried surgical remedy....but it didn't help. My late wife, her brother, his wife and some other friends all took their diving certification stuff....and then for various reasons,...each of them dropped out of the class. I'd resigned myself to give the sinus surgery a chance....surgeon was also a diver and he felt like success was most probable. During my years diving I've been close....crazy close....to sharks a plenty. It was all good as I was most often near rocks, reefs, shipwreck structure, etc. Cover was close, if needed. The exposure and sketchy periods were when getting to the bottom & when resurfacing....there I sometimes felt like bait on a hook. Since then I have had some close calls when I was simply swimming on a beach day.....going for a swim to cool off from the sun. One time I had my early teenage son with us....We saw a sand bar a couple hundred yards off shore.,...there were surfers out there. He was deadset on making it out there. I finally caved in and told him we could go but he had to listen to me...currents and such. He agreed and out we went....all was well until it wasn't. I found out the scary way that baitfish were schooling in spots between the sand bar and the shallows. We were swimming amidst the schooling baitfish....joining them on the freakin menu. I saw one, two then three sets of dorsal fins surface in between waves. Then one came too close....got my son's attention and lied to him....told him to get in close with me and we were headed back to shore because I was cramping. He was pissed, but he did what he was told and then gave me a dose of ribbing later on...."Dad you wanna hand me a drink.....oh no...don't do it....you'll cramp up", "Dad....you want me to take the cooler back to the car....don't want you cramping up", etc. My favorite kind of vacation is to sandy places. Don't want to become baitfish again, though....ever. Never thought it would be an issue until recent weeks. Met a gal who is a diver....kept my shark aversions quiet, lol No yoga....period. Could be the greatest thing ever.....but I'm sidestepping. Same could be said of other types of group excursive. I'm a no-class sorta dude. Not going to line up and get into some torture. I prefer to do my torture in solo....lick my wounds and gain the benefits results. I have to protect my shout out knees and right shoulder and keep pre-habbing them until I can get schedules aligned to have joint replacements done. My geriatric-bariatric sorta gym stuff would likely have younger womenz laughing their butts off. So yeah....the gym is where I need to go it alone....for now, at least. Nothing illegal...or at least keep it mostly legal. I'm not robbing banks...but if she asked really nicely and had a killer smile....I may be her getaway driver and lookout. Snakes are off limits. So if they are into snakes as pets.....it is gonna take a HEAP of Dr. Phil-esqe counseling to make that something I can ease up on. My time in the woods has me averse to snakes. The part of Georgia where I live has many varieties of rattlesnakes, copperheads, moccasins, etc, etc. I've had some sketchy moments with 'em all and I went to guns every time. Probably wouldn't go over well with a date who had pet snakes. ......................................... Note that karaoke is now off the list. I'm averse to it. Averse as all hell......but developments yesterday have me sliding that one off my radar. I met someone who sings. I mean, sings at a high level, in formal events, etc. When the subject came up in conversation I was coy....thinking, "here we go with the freakin karaoke silliness"....but I kept my mouth zipped as she was discussing things she enjoyed....music...making music via singing wasn't a hobby....but a passion. My coy arse ...when asked about likes...simply said something cornball regarding singing. "Well...it is highly ironic that we have met...you being a singer, and all." Winked and nodded...knowingly (even though I no nothingsss...strong is my ignorance). She bit and wanted to know more. I deflected and said something about having a small bit of singing experience.....at a professional level....but didn't want to bore her with details....wanted to find out more about her. So it went for a few minutes until she went back to my singing and pressed the matter. "Well, young lady....here is the cosmic irony on this matter....you are clearly impassioned & talented with your voice.....so very odd that we would meet.....you see...you are now looking at the WORST singer on the face of the Earth.....or at least in this county.....I suck.....I've even been paid to NOT sing....had dollar bills tossed at me to put the mic down.....so there it is....I am in awe of your courage to stand up and rock your voice......I am in awe and I'm hardcore untrainable in that area". She laughed and took it all in stride. "So what can you be trained to do....." Mr Cornball here replied with something dumb like, "For starters, I am housebroken...errr mostly housebroken. I can bark...or not bark...roll over, shake and play dead, fetch....you know, stuff like that". She laughed again...but not laughing in the way of "somebody come save me from this nerd....somebody, anybody". Humored laughing....dare I hope, acceptance laughter....is that even a thing ? When I say we laughed....I mean throughout the afternoon and eventing we laughed. Either this gal is challenged or she was actually amused at my dipshyt self. I was intrigued of everything she volunteered about her life, likes, loves, views. @GreenTealael had recently stated major bigtime advice that was THE SURE 'NUFF TRUTH. it pertained to core values being integral to compatibility. Not realizing it was occurring, this lady and I spent hours yesterday covering so much ground that it was unreal. By dawns light this morning I am still shaking my head in amazement. Without me realizing it had occurred....we'd checked off a pile core belief simpaticoisms....yep that is now a word. Simpatico-isms. I was open and honest and simply went with it. Each topic was a new discovery of our views and feels about stuff. Been down this road a good bit lately....and there were always stumbling issues or categories where divergent views may be a red flag. I'm not talking about politics or stuff like that. I couldn't give a rip about that. I appreciate different viewpoints. I mean the bigger issues... Here are some of the hurdles or outright roadblocks that I've had recently in this bachelor living...and this is with even short term fun: No married women. As tempting as a couple have made it...No-Can-Do. I am NOT about to go there. DO NO HARM is the hill I will die on....regardless of the temptation. No coworkers...or at least within my work "zone". There is an engineer and another administrator in another "zone" where some interesting recent conversations have occurred. Even then, I waded much more cautiously than other situations. My sobriety will not be compromised. Long story...shortened version: haven't had a drop since February 2019. Quit for practical reasons to be a responsible caregiver 24/7. Considered myself a casual drinker...social drinker.....but in the years since I saw where I'd used alcohol as a crutch...a tool...a mechanism to distance myself from work stress....or marital stress... I later acknowledged it was a simply delaying those stress & ultimately combining them. So, after my wife passed in 2021...I maintained the sobriety...realizing it was in my best interest. Since then I have benefited hugely from it. I can go out with a girl and am A-Okay with her having a drink or three....I'll have my coffee, water and am just fine. I won't open a bottle or pop a top again, though. Matters of the soul. Didn't seem like this would be an issue for initial attraction and such. But I found that even in casual contact it can and does surface and diametrically opposing views are a non-starter....even if physical attraction is main the component the main draw. Back to yesterday's first meet with lil' Miss Singer....it--was--wonderful. Wunnerfull....I didn't want to be pushy,....or forward....but....wow. So refreshing, I was thirsty for more....and it was shared, clearly. She even stated such....boldly. Stepped up and put it out there....interest demonstrated. She made the first commit. I had been keeping my desires reserved...she was... different. I was having different feels and did not want to rush into anything. This was someone that, yes, major physical attraction is there...but all my no-can-do stuff were non-issues...taken in stride....acceptance. She probably has guys hitting on her all the time and I didn't want to be another schuck trying to come on to her. I mean...I DID want to...but there seemed to be "more than that" taking shape. Everything was.....different. Yeah, I know I said that already...having difficulty finding correct verbiage to accurately describe. Your ever had the thought that you'd love to go back in time and slap the cowboy shyt outa your past self..and do so at a most specific moment and change the outcome and improve the trajectory of past self ???? Yesterday at some point after an hour or so...it was almost as if I felt a hand on my shoulder....a warning hand...it was telling me to slow the roll...be real....look at the bigger picture....and boy howdy, there is a strong hint there is possibly healthy structure for a bigger picture. The hand on the shoulder clenched down more than once....the physical desires needed to be reminded of the cosmic slap that was needed. Dumb as it may sound.....and for whatever reason I can be grateful for....I was calm and didn't blow it....wasn't "that dude". It was rewarded with hours more talking, laughing, disclosing, supporting, etc, etc. --------------------------- So.... we have an actual, real deal, no kiddin' super official date next week...Wednesday. We had to plot through our work schedules to figure it out...but it is set. A date. Not a hook up.

Yeah, the wine’s likely the issue. Alcohol messes with your sleep, especially if you drink late. At 10 pm, your body’s still processing it hours later. Get out of bed for a bit, keep lights low, do something boring. Try again when you feel sleepy. Skip the wine next time and see if that helps.

Wait, seriously? GLP-1s might help with depression and alcohol issues too? I had no idea these could do more than just weight and blood sugar stuff.

Good advice above. Gotta love this place. I regained 7kg last year after losing for a year and a half after surgery, and then holding pretty steady at my below target weight for another year. Like you I know where my 7kg came from. For me it's alcohol and carbs (and sometimes alcoholic carbs!) When I get back to basics and stop drinking wine and eating white carbs it comes off slowly. When I don't it goes back on - somewhat less slowly! I am kind of allowing myself to bounce about within a 5kg window and managing that but honestly I am working kinda hard to achieve it. So far I haven't seen the scales climb any higher but I know a crisis or even just a change in circumstances or health (mental or physical) could scupper me. I do not take being this weight for granted. I hope you can get back on track - I know you have an incentive with your back problem but that doesn't make it one bit easier.

I wouldn't know. I have no experience with "small amounts". I don't begin to understand the causation, biology, anatomy, genealogy, etc, etc, etc. All I can say is that I had my WLS at a time when my wife and I were both seeing an uptick in our drinking. Perhaps to mask the problems in our marriage....perhaps to make the best of things.....perhaps we simply enjoyed it. The WLS, gym work and new way of eating were working wonders for my health. Initially this was met with approval and it seemed to be really helpful in calming the stormy seas of our marriage. I was firmly committed to keeping the weight loss train chugging ahead. After healing from the surgery I began drinking. No beer, but high grade tequila and vodka with skinny mixers. Without the benefit of meals, the impact was much deeper than simply sipping beer and then having dinner. This was 7-ish years ago. Fast forward to today. I've been alcohol free for the past 6+ years. It simplifies things. It is one less variable in daily life. It is simply easier for me to abstain than it is to have something else to measure, to control, to monitor. Right now monitoring my diet is enough. I don't know much about alcohol and I'm quite sure my surgeon and his staff all said to avoid it, period. LOL, to me listening to that noise at the time. I can say this....it is refreshing and good to not have it be part of my life. I face things head on and get to solving issues right away vs sulking and sipping on them over a night or two. Strong coffee is a much better substitute for me. Get some professional alcohol-specific guidance on this matter. IT can improve the trajectory of your life. Don't try to wing it and solve this on your own. Get the right advisors onboard and helping you make the best decisions for you.

It's just a guess, but this sounds like a condition called Sudden Onset Alcohol Intolerance. If my guess is correct, It's probably not related to your surgery as this can happen to anyone. There are lots of potential underlying causes for sudden onset alcohol intolerance, some of which are related to other health issues and some that aren't. Feel free to look up the condition if you're curious. Obviously seeing a medical professional would be the best course of action if it concerns you, especially if you're concerned about the other related health conditions like allergies, endocrine disorders and Crohn’s disease. Not to sound "preachy", but at the end of the day, alcohol is a poison. For most people, their bodies work hard to process the poison and remove it from their systems. At low doses, it can do this reasonable well. At higher doses, it gets overwhelmed and this is what causes a "hangover". In your case, it's not even being able to tolerate low doses. You may need to take this as a sign you need to stop ingesting it.

Hi everyone, I'm new to this forum. I had gastric sleeve surgery, six years ago. I noticed immediately that I can't drink as much, but after 6 years I can barely handle one drink, without getting a headache, high heart rate and feeling very tired. My main question is, why has this taken 6 years to happen? I was ok on small amounts, for the first five years.

I have pain if I eat too much, or don't chew enough times before swallowing in the upper area of my abdomen, as if the pouch is not allowing any more food in it and pushing up on the diaphragm. I guess it is in the esophagus, but I learned my less the first time it happened and now the only time it happens when I eat too much shrimp. I keep it to 2 oz. Fluid is the most important thing. I would avoid carbonated beverages, and alcohol, you need to let your body heal from surgery before going off plan. Stick to the plan your team has given you. The most problems that end up in the ER are for dehydration. I drink Crystal Light with Isopure Clear Protein in my drinks to get the protein goals I have. Good luck!

I was an early adopter of sparkling water too but I let a lot of the bubbles go first so it was semi flat. Plus I sipped on that glass (500ml) for a few hours. I turned to it as plain water started to become heavy and difficult to drink so sparkling water gave me an alternative to predominately plain water. I still do this almost every day. I actually gave up a lot of carbonated drinks years before my surgery (except for soda or tonic water as a mixer & champagne). Carbonation is terrible if you have reflux (GERD) of which I had a mild case so it is something to keep in mind especially as you have a sleeve. I’m not a big or regular alcohol drinker any more either & I can’t recall the last time I had soda or tonic water as a mixer. Still have the odd glass of champagne - maybe one or two glasses a month. As for being able to take large gulps, drink large volumes of liquid or take multiple sips at a time is an individual thing. Personally I can’t gulp any more nor can I take more than 2 or 3 sips at a time. (E.g. had trouble swallowing a med last year - 4 attempts then up came all the water & the med I had finally swallowed.) Regularly sipping doesn’t bother me. I never feel thirsty or at least never so thirsty I need to take several gulps or down a whole glass at a time. It comes down to what you and your tummy is happy with you doing in regards to how much liquid you can swallow at a time and to carbonation.

ok... first: DISCLAIMER...we are all different and will experience life and all its awesomeness in different ways. what *I* go through is in no way indicative of what YOU will go through. with that said, I am closing in on 7 years post-op (sleeve) here is/was MY experience: - i accidentally found out that i was able to GULP a whole bunch of liquid at around 3 weeks post op (i was super thirsty at the time), and have no problem doing it since. - i was cleared for ALL food/drinks at 1 month post op (except alcohol..which was 6 months**). - i started drinking carbonated drinks (i.e, Perrier or Soda Water) at about 1 month post op) and had no issues, and i could even GULP it! i did not drink sugary carbonated drinks much at this time...except for tonic water, which i had with my GIN or VODKA. ** i drank maybe 4-5 partial gin/vodka tonics in the time before i reached GOAL at 7 months post op. - since reaching goal (like 7 years ago!), i have regulary drank carbonated drinks (real sugar and artificially sweetened) almost every day. i also have some sort of alcohol every day, but that's a different story, ha! - i have maintained BELOW my stated goal weight (127 lbs) since achieving it more than 6 years ago. - i am currently 103 lbs, and eat admittedly not the healthiest, but i exercise like a m-f*cker so i think it all evens out. Edited to add: for those that my think i'm like way underweight, i'm barely 5'2" so my current weight is actually "healthy" for my height (at least that's what BMI and my doctor says, ha!)

I actually never restarted drinking sodas after surgery and don't miss them at all. Same with alcohol. You do you, but I figured if I was fine without them for that long, what did I have to gain by restarting?

I'm not entirely sure if this is a win, but let me give you a little bit of my backstory first. Thanks to a work accident many years ago, I have multiple herniated discs in my lumbar spine that sometimes cause a lot of sciatica. When this was at its worst, I had to use a walker just to get around the house because I had no motor control over my right leg. To be honest, this is one of the things that actually led to me becoming obese. I wasn't able to workout (I could hardly move), and was in a lot of pain, so I self-medicated with food and alcohol. The pain isn't completely gone now, but after losing all this weight, it's so much better than it used to be. Fast forward to this week. I spent basically 4 days (Saturday-Tuesday), trapped in a zoom class and this inactivity took its toll on my back. I'd been in a lot of pain and hadn't worked out at all since taking a short run Monday. Wednesday and Thursday I didn't get the walker out, but i did seriously think about it. Today the pain was still about a four or five on a ten point scale, but at least it wasn't radiating down my leg much. I really struggled with trying to determine if I just needed to man up, or if it was stupid to try to workout, knowing that I might make it worse. I finally decided I just needed to try to run, since I knew that once the endorphins and endocannabinoids kicked in, I'd probably be fine. Plus, the movement should actually help loosen things up in my spine and help me heal. It took a bit for me to work up to going for it, but I did finally go run this morning. (The bad thing was that the delay meant I was running in the heat.) To be honest, the run really sucked for the first mile or two. Thankfully, once I made it to about 4 miles, the pain was mostly gone and I was able to complete the 9 miles I had planned. I'm still thinking I'm going to have to skip my strength training tomorrow (I'll probably log a few running miles instead), but at least I got out there. The more I think about it, the more I'm convinced that completing the run wasn't actually a win. The win was that I didn't let this pain become the start of a spiral down to a place I never want to go to again. I personally think the most important thing is not actually the highs, though those are great. It's not succumbing to the lows and letting yourself fall back into those old destructive habits. I wanted to throw this out there because i know I post a lot here and I suspect some of you might think I've got it all together since I'm normally the one giving advice to others. That's just not true. Like everyone, I have my own demons that I have to deal with and this back pain is just one of those.

I realize this is an older thread...but it is still near the top of page and I suppose the "most recent" of it's type ? A pile of stuff has occurred in my life since I was active here on B,Pals. My 10th year sleeve anniversary is coming up later this year. Lost a ton of unwanted weight as a result of the sleeve. Daily trips to gym were the norm. no longer drank beer, but found that sugar free mixers and high grade tequilas and vodkas made for some FUN fuel for many adventures. Storm clouds loomed heavily over my marriage. Some unresolved issues resurfaced in a big ugly way. It appeared divorce was most probable. The storm finally broke....my ship hadn't crashed on the rocks... my wife still my first mate, ally, friend and lover....marriage was stronger than ever. 6 years ago she received a diagnosis for stage 4 breast cancer. Immediately stopped drinking when that diagnosis was delivered. 4 years ago she succumbed to the evil hell of cancer. She fought it with superhuman strength and courage. I will live the rest of my years in awe of her bravery and grit. It has been an incredibly tough go of it since. Her unshakable faith stoked my own faith. That is what I leaned on heavily....and will continue to do so. Early last month, the anniversary of her death was approaching. I was filled with this feeling of guilt in addition to the ever present loss & grief. The guilt was spurned by the realization that I had taken zero steps towards what she had told me to do...afterwards. She was clear that she wanted me to live. I was going to work every day and that was the extent of it. I'd maintained zero friendships and seldom contact my family, other than our son. The hurricane damage had been repaired on the house, yet I'd done nothing towards moving stuff back into the rooms that were repaired. Was living off take out and drive through garbage because I couldn't bring myself to cook...painful memories of meals made & shared together. ENOUGH. That was the word that hung heavy in the air. I could almost hear it as if she'd spoken it loudly. ENOUGH, GREG...IT IS TIME TO MAN-UP I began taking inventory right then. I vowed to not let another year go by with me still living in a bubble...not treading water, but sinking. I have remained alcohol free since quitting those six years. Clear headed and no monsters to address there. Good. Doctors appointment for annual checkup had revealed several things....top of which was my blood panel looked like trash...precisely because that is what my diet consisted of....pure trash. There had been some weight regain...but nothing that I felt like would be too difficult to lose....if I would get my arse in gear and make the lifestyle changes needed. Things were going okay on my job, simply because I'd let it be my focus...the only thing I rallied for. Spent way too much time there. Immediately scheduled some vacation time off and road tripped to visit family Visited my wife's grave....our gravesite and did so with a different feel....loss and missing her....but, feeling more stable for the first time since losing her. She'd forced me to sit down, months before passing, and listen to her on a certain subject matter that I was avoiding. told me to live...how to live....wanted me to continue on with all aspects of life and was very descriptive. She would make ongoing instruction in the months ahead. I couldn't speak in reply...just nod that I understood. She was so brave that she could accept things and love me enough to coach me how to live....afterwards. I was too much of a coward to discuss it....just sat there and listened and acknowledged. She would KICK my arse if she saw the state of low I'd been to. One day, perhaps, I will be able to show her that I heard her and rallied. That time will be at the end of my days, however. Until then, there is much life to live. RESETTING THE SLEEVE WAS EASY: I simply swapped over to strict keto. After two weeks I felt much better....after a month I no longer wanted the crap foods and I no longer wanted big meals. The smaller meals reset things for me. There is a noticeable restriction and feeling of full that occurs now. I haven't finished a meal in a month...unless it was a 1/2 sized meal. Sipping water all day...cutting off prior to meals and 30 mins after. Zero sugar intake an damn few non-fiber carbs. Supplementing with vitamins, iron, potassium and calcium. Moving more....but still not ready for the gym and all the people. Slowly feeling emotionally more "awake". Keto, with an eye on the overall daily calorie intake is how I live now. I don't see changing that. By the time that 10th surgery anniversary arrives, I suspect I will be at my all time lowest weight since college. The sleeve is still there. It just needed me to treat it right and not override it with trash food.

I am going to ask you a question that I also ask myself when I have periods of consuming things I know I should not have. How did it get in your house? It's one thing to be in a place where temptation strikes. Maybe you go to a wedding and you are handed a glass of champagne. Maybe you go to your friend's birthday party and you take a piece of cake because everyone else has one. Okay, fine. This is not likely to be an ongoing issue unless your social calendar is booked constantly (in which case you need a plan). (But also, not fine because you are at 8 weeks out and your stomach is like a delicate baby that you are feeding trash. More like fine a year from now.) But if you are on day 6 of drinking wine while watching TV at night, all snug on your sofa... why is there wine in your house? Did you buy it? Did someone else bring it in? Is it left over from something? The easiest way not to drink alcohol casually is to have no alcohol in the house. The easiest way not to eat chips, or chocolate, or ice cream is... to not have it around. Get rid of it. I know a lot of us have issues with "wasting" food or drink. What I've come to realize only slowly is that there is no difference between me eating junk I don't need that is not good for me and putting it down the garbage disposal. Except in the second scenario, I don't gain weight. After Easter, I bought a big bag of jelly beans on clearance. They weren't very good. Even so, I kept eating them. I put them in the cupboard and kept getting a handful every time I walked past. And then I would eat a few and say these are really not very good. And then I would KEEP EATING THEM! Finally, after I did this several times, I stopped and asked myself what I was doing. Why was I eating these? Why did I buy them? And my only answer was because I was bored, and a little stressed, and they were there. Also, I like jelly beans. Only I didn't like them. So, I threw them away. An almost full bag, in the garbage. I know! The waste! But I didn't need them, I didn't like them, and they were making me crave all sorts of other sweets. I just kept thinking about the fact they were there. It made me want them. When they were gone, I could no longer eat them, and I didn't care enough to go buy more. For the first year, I did most of my grocery shopping through curbside pick up. I planned what to buy based on a menu plan, and that's all I got. No impulse buys. No clearance bins. No getting a dozen bags of something bad for me because it was on sale. I gave away all my alcohol or poured it down the drain. I threw away the junk food and organized my pantry so I could find things at a glance. I made a list of healthy things that were easy to eat or take along because I know I will always eat what's easy and not what's difficult. I meal prep for the week so that I don't have to cook and prep every single day and I have no excuse to eat out. I'll also be honest that the hardest times for me were before surgery when I was trying to follow a nutrition plan but had a lot of hunger and cravings, and from around 9 months out when weight loss had slowed and my appetite was becoming more noticeable and my weight loss naturally slowed. The fact that you're feeling like this at 8 weeks is concerning because this is the time when your ability to stay motivated should be highest (constant reinforcement when you step on the scale and lose weight almost every day), and your ability to eat is the least. Don't let this drag on without addressing it. Talk to your team. Because it's only going to get harder. Maybe you're bored. Or scared of change. Or you don't believe the surgery will work and you're turning it into a self fulfilling prophecy because that's easier emotionally than trying and failing. Or you just can't help yourself when the food or alcohol is in the house because you're addicted. Whatever it is, the best day to fix it is today. And ask your family and friends for help. Be accountable to others and to yourself. Because you can fix this, but if you don't, you won't reach your goal.

Me either. Why go through all that's needed to get the surgery then stop doing what's needed to achieve the goal? Determine your goal and get some counseling to change your mindset. Addictive personalities tend to substitute the food for something else. Alcohol, etc. I had to chuckle at how many times @The Greater Fool called the surgery, the MAGIC SURGERY. lol. It was kind of magic for me TBH. It fixed whatever was causing all of my weight loss efforts to fail. I exercised and dieted for years with limited results. So, it was extremely satisfying when it all finally actually worked, and I got healthy. I don't kill myself with dieting anymore or with extreme exercise pre-op. I walk 2 miles a day and try to stay moving and do some weights. I eat normally now (2 years out) but stay within the guidelines of the plan and treat myself on occasion with a drink or a piece of chocolate. I do know some people who believe the shot (GLP-1) are magic too. LOL They eat whatever they want without moving and then wonder why it's not working. People can out eat the drugs one DR told me while discussing my RNY. I have never used them but know it has helped others in addition to their WLS. Bottom line, neither WLS nor the drugs will work all on their own. But it sure helps to get you there. Do what you need to do now to become healthy again. Which in the end is really the most important thing. The honeymoon doesn't last foreva..... GL @Claire D I wish you the best!!!

Hi lovelies, I hope you’re all doing well? You were all so supportive with the question I asked a few weeks ago that I thought I would come here and see if you have any advice for me now! As of tomorrow I am eight weeks out from the gastric bypass procedure. I have lost quite a bit of weight (2 stone) which I’m absolutely delighted about (and people are starting to notice which has been a really good feeling). However, I must have THE most stubborn self sabotaging streak because I have started to drink alcohol again (and not just on special occasions) as well as not following the food rules and not exercising. I can’t understand why I’m being like this because my family are so happy that I’ve done this and have been so supportive, and my friends (even though they don’t know about the operation are really starting to notice) so WHY am I doing this to myself? I just wondered if you guys knew of a reason I may have hit the wall so early (I really do not want to fail) and especially if you have any advice, book recommendations apps or anything that I might be able to do to help me get back on track and find my way again. Really appreciated as always thank you xx

Weight loss surgery success journey stories are important because the written word enables us to connect on an emotional basis with others. Telling our journey stories is a way to build a deeper level of understanding. Thinking about and creating our stories regarding our life history, life experiences, and influences on our lives can be related to family, friends, acquaintances, and even strangers. Everyone has different, exceptional life experiences with unique and special stories to share and teach others. My own story is one of redemption and salvation – but my redemption involved turning away from religion, and my salvation came from science. I was born and raised in a religious, conservative Christian home in Charlotte, North Carolina. My parents are both immigrants from Taiwan, and they moved to the United States in the 1980s. Their command of the English language and understanding of American culture were poor. Their acclimation to the United States was heavily dependent on their participation in the Charlotte Chinese Baptist Church. The Christian Baptist church is where my parents first initially met each other. They dated for a short period of time before they made the decision to get married. After marriage, they gave birth to me as their first born, and two years later, my younger sister. As far back as I can remember, my family attended Sunday services at the conservative Christian Baptist church on a regular basis. I was indoctrinated into being a conservative Christian by my family, friends, teachers, classmates, schools, and the conservative Christian church we attended. I was taught to believe in Jesus, Virgin Mary, and the existence of heaven and hell. We prayed in church, and I was taught to "give my life to god" and to avoid "sin." I was taught homosexuality was a sin and that LGBT people went to hell. My parents forbade my sister and me from dating, and I was told by my family, church, and teachers to save my virginity for marriage, which meant premarital sex was a major taboo. When I was in middle school, all of us girls were enrolled in the "Best Friends" program, an abstinence-only "sex education" program. The program merely consisted of "just say no" if boys wanted sex. Throughout my entire childhood, I unfortunately endured extreme domestic/family violence and experienced severe physical, verbal, emotional, psychological, spiritual/religious, and sexual abuse, incest, trauma, and molestation perpetrated by my conservative Christian father. My conservative Christian father was a very active volunteer at church, and he was highly respected by fellow church leaders and members of the congregation. However, he used his outward acts of service for the church as a deceptive mask to harbor many deep, dark secrets behind closed doors. My father was a chronic alcoholic and domineering, psychopathic perpetrator of horrific violence. He was a sadistic sociopath who derived sick pleasure from abusing my mother, my sister, and me in every way possible: physically, verbally, emotionally, psychologically, spiritually/religiously, and sexually assaulting, molesting, traumatizing, and humiliating us. My father weaponized the Bible as a tool to repeatedly abuse, assault, control, molest, terrorize, threaten, and violate my mother, sister, and me. He claimed the Bible justified his abuse, violence, and mistreatment towards us. He was a gun owner who threatened on countless occasions to murder the three of us and burn down our home “to destroy the evidence," so our bodies would never be found. Both my parents constantly warned I would be sent away to a foster home, where I would be treated far worse by strangers if I ever told my school teachers or complained to authorities about the horrific abuse and violence that was taking place at home on a daily basis. As an innocent young child, I wholeheartedly believed every word of my parents as I did not know any better. A middle school classmate noticed a bruise on my arm and asked me about it. I confided in her about the abuse and violence being perpetuated by my parents against me at home. She was sincerely concerned about my safety and worried about my well-being and told our homeroom teacher, who in turn, informed the middle school guidance counselor. After lunch, I was pulled from algebra class and asked to speak with the guidance counselor. Out of my irrational fear of being removed from my family home, the only place I'd ever known, I lied and said I'd injured myself by accident. At the time, I thought I was in trouble because I'd never been removed from class. I wanted only to return to math class to avoid missing any important class material. Back when I was an innocent child, I still believed in a just and merciful God. I used to kneel at my bed every night and fervently pray to God to kill me in my sleep. I desperately wished to die so I would not be forced to endure another day of extreme abuse and violence. It's heartbreaking for me to think back now about how I started seriously contemplating suicide when I was a young child. I did not wish to live and did not want to continue enduring the horrific abuse I experienced as a child at home every day. No one seemed to care about or love me, not even my own parents. I felt absolutely trapped in this living hell at home. As a child, my parents would not allow me to seek mental health care since doing so would reveal their abuse and violence towards me, and they knew they would face severe legal repercussions. My immigrant parents came from a conservative, traditional Asian culture and attached a very negative stigma to psychological services. They viewed patients who sought mental health treatment as "crazy." At the age of 18, I was finally able to move out on my own, and I left my hometown of Charlotte, North Carolina to attend the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. I began to meet and learn from people of different races, ethnicities, socioeconomic classes, religions/non-religions, with family backgrounds and histories that were unlike the oppressive, conservative Christian culture I'd grown up with. I was exposed to new, fascinating ideas, thoughts, and perspectives from my university professors and fellow college students. I learned about liberal. progressive Democrats and the concepts of socioeconomic and racial injustice, diversity, equity, and inclusion, women’s rights, and more. I was exposed for the first time to secular ideas. I began questioning the existence of God at this juncture. All the rules and regulations I'd been taught to follow by my conservative Christian family and church as a means to salvation had brought me nothing but painful despair and misery throughout my entire life up to that point. I was exposed to an entirely new world in college in which I learned that I had value as an individual as well as learning critical thinking skills, philosophical logic, and scientific thought. However, the years of abuse had left many scars. I sought help from a psychiatrist who finally diagnosed me with major depressive disorder (MDD), generalized anxiety disorder (GAD)/panic attacks, and complex post-traumatic stress disorder (C-PTSD). My psychiatrist prescribed antidepressant and antianxiety medications for me, and I also began intensive psychotherapy. I sought out trauma-focused mental health counselors and therapists and successfully completed countless mental health treatments and therapies for my healing and recovery. I discovered the abuse and violence I experienced during my childhood was not my fault, and I was not to blame whatsoever despite what my conservative Christian family constantly told me. I also learned about concepts and techniques such as self-care, emotional regulation, and developing healthy boundaries. The mental health treatments I received included Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT), Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) therapy, Somatic Experiencing (SE) therapy, Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) group therapy as well as medical treatments such as Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS) treatment and esketamine treatment. In addition, I attended support groups for survivors of childhood abuse and incest, sexual assault, rape, and religious trauma. My journey back from the brink had finally begun. However, I was about to take a huge and very dangerous detour in my journey of healing. Food was my drug of choice back then. I used to binge eat massive amounts of food to desperately fill the empty void of nothingness I felt within and to cope with my feelings of depression, sadness, worthlessness, hopelessness, guilt, shame, fear, emotional numbness, fatigue, exhaustion, migraines, stomachaches, anxiety, panic attacks, nightmares, flashbacks, difficulty with focus and concentration, and other symptoms. I preferred unhealthy junk food and fast food that provided me with momentary comfort. I gained prodigious amounts of weight. The antidepressants I took increased my appetite, causing more weight gain. The weight gain made me feel even more depressed, and the depression made me eat ever increasing amounts of food, which became a vicious cycle. I developed social anxiety and hated going out in public because I feared strangers bullying and taunting me for my appearance. I am 5 feet, 6 inches tall, and unbelievable as it may seem to most people, at my maximum, I weighed a staggering 321 pounds at my highest and had a BMI of 51.8. I was super morbidly obese, extremely unhealthy, and unfortunately, developed many serious, chronic health issues over the years. Due to the excess weight, I used to get winded easily and ran out of energy very quickly. I could not stand or walk for more than a few minutes before I began experiencing excruciating pain in my back, forcing me to sit and rest before I could stand and walk again. I suffered from numerous chronic, life-threatening health conditions, which included high blood pressure, high cholesterol, pre-diabetes, obstructive sleep apnea, chronic back pain, knee pain, non-alcoholic fatty liver disease, hiatal hernia, and others. Since I have a family history of even more severe health issues such as stroke, heart disease, diabetes, and cancer, I saw the writing on the wall. My super morbid obesity was literally killing me, and my future seemed bleak and hopeless. Due to my ever growing weight and developing serious, chronic health conditions which made my life excruciating painful and miserable physically and psychologically, I still had suicidal ideation, conducted detailed research on methods for ending my life, and even began to make active suicide plans. Fortunately, President Barack Obama successfully passed the Affordable Care Act, commonly referred to as “Obamacare.” Obamacare was the first time in my life I had the opportunity to obtain health insurance as an adult. Luckily, I also discovered Dr. Peter C. Ng, MD, FACS, FASMBS at Rex Bariatrics and their amazing UNC Rex Health bariatric surgical team in Raleigh, North Carolina. On Monday, October 6, 2014, I underwent a form of bariatric (weight loss) surgery called the duodenal switch with Dr. Peter Ng at UNC Rex Hospital in Raleigh, North Carolina. Thanks to Dr. Ng and his compassionate bariatric team at UNC/Rex Healthcare, my recovery was finally back on track. Science, not religion, literally saved my life. My closest friends volunteered to help me many times, and they're absolutely critical to my success. Cathy took me to all my doctor’s appointments and was my biggest cheerleader. Joni was another amazing mentor and took excellent care of me at home while I was recovering from surgery. I would not be alive today if it weren't for Barack Obama, Dr. Peter Ng, Cathy, Joni, and other dear friends. I learned how to eat a healthy diet and began an exercise regimen to help take off all the excess weight. I worked tirelessly and pushed myself to the limit in terms of my diet, exercise, and lifestyle transformation. It was very difficult to say the least, but I succeeded, not through prayer or faith in God, but through hard work, sheer will, grit, perseverance, determination, and tenacity. Ultimately, I lost 191 lbs – a weight loss I'm very happy and pleased to report I’ve maintained to this very day. I now weigh 130 lbs, which is exactly what I weighed when I was 18 years old, and I have a very healthy BMI of 21.0. Since I've lost and kept off such a massive amount of weight, I no longer have any of the aforementioned health issues; they’ve all completely resolved themselves, for which I am very thankful. I eat a healthy diet, am physically fit, and lead a physically active, robust lifestyle. My friends lovingly refer to me as the "Energizer Bunny." I am happy and healthy now. I continue to take antidepressant medications and to see my psychiatrist and therapist because major depression is prone to relapse without ongoing treatment. I've developed a strong, iron-clad support system of compassionate, caring, kind, empathetic, generous chosen family and loved ones, all of whom I'm incredibly grateful to have in my life. I do not begrudge faith to people who take comfort in religion; however, the toxic form of Christianity that consumed my childhood nearly ended my life. I was saved by science and human compassion. My will to keep fighting came not from a belief in a reward after death, but from learning of the inherent value each of us has here on earth while we are alive and breathing. I visited my bariatric surgeon Dr. Ng for my annual follow-up visit last year on Wednesday, October 1, 2024. I received my blood work test results, and my labs were "perfect." Every year, Dr. Ng laughingly tells me my blood test results are better than his own! Dr. Ng is, without a doubt, my favorite surgeon since he literally saved my life. I’m exceptionally grateful for him and his expert surgical skills in performing the duodenal switch bariatric weight loss surgery on me, and I’m also tremendously thankful to the entire UNC Health Rex medical team. Sunday, October 6, 2024 marked a significant date in my life; it was my ten-year surgiversary. In case you aren't aware, a surgiversary is the anniversary of a surgery, most commonly associated with bariatric (weight loss) surgery, a medically necessary surgical procedure which profoundly changed my life with the best possible outcome. I’ve been grateful and fortunate to find peace, bliss, happiness, and joy in life without the need for religion or belief in a god or higher power. I absolutely love my life, and I'm beyond excited and thrilled to experience all the fantastic joy and happiness that life has to offer. I finally love and truly believe in myself. I'm an outgoing, hardworking, highly energetic Taiwanese American leader and activist. I’m self-employed and work tirelessly at multiple contract and freelance paid positions. My roles include working as a private military defense contractor with the U.S. Department of Defense by assisting active duty U.S. military personnel with their Mandarin speaking skills at a U.S. military base, as a Mandarin speaking private tutor, as an independent film & media contractor for Rob Underhill Productions, as a freelance writer & editor, and as a social media marketing manager. I'm a multicultural individual with a global mindset. I'm known for my values and strength of character: ethics, integrity, perseverance, resilience, and tenacity. Brimming with confidence, commitment to excellence, fervent drive to succeed, innovative thinking, and positive, can-do, go-getter attitude. My passions and strengths include professional networking, social media marketing, event planning, business development, communication, leadership, writing/editing, and team building. I'm well-connected politically and socially including CEOs, VPs, C-Suite executives, elected government officials, directors, leadership, management, business owners, entrepreneurs, physicians, attorneys, engineers, sales & marketing, real estate brokers, creatives, musicians, artists, innovators, and other powerful community leaders at local, state, and federal government levels, U.S Department of Defense (DoD), Fortune 500 companies, and nonprofits in Raleigh/Durham/Chapel Hill/RDU/Triangle, North Carolina, United States, Taiwan, China, and elsewhere around the world. I'm passionate about personal growth, living a fulfilling, purposeful life, and highly value community engagement. Most importantly I love volunteering, inspiring and motivating others, “paying it forward,” and having a positive impact on the community and world around me. I spend much of my free time performing charity work, volunteering at my alma mater UNC-Chapel Hill, promoting business owners, and volunteering and canvassing for Democratic politicians and elected government officials at local, state, and federal levels of government. I'm active in volunteering with many nonprofit organizations, mainly secular and non-religious, although I've cultivated and maintained dear, loving friendships with Called to Peace Ministries, a Christian-affiliated nonprofit organization that provides advocacy, education, support, and practical assistance to domestic violence survivors. In addition, I love volunteering to help people who are struggling with their own weight loss challenges, and I always hope my own story will inspire them. The causes I hold closest to my heart are ending domestic violence and abuse, ending poverty, promoting secular humanism, critical thinking, and science education, advocating for separation of church and state, supporting mental health advocacy and research, supporting social, economic, and racial justice and diversity, equity, inclusion, and helping people who are overweight and obese in their journeys to lead healthier, more physically active lives. I'm extremely active politically and have volunteered countless hours for Democratic political candidates' campaigns in Wake County/Raleigh/Triangle/RDU/RTP, North Carolina with their successful election and re-election to elected government office positions. In addition, I'm very active in the secular humanist movement by participating in local, state, and national meetings and conferences with my favorite organizations including The Freethought Society, Recovering From Religion, American Humanist Association, and countless others. I also enjoy volunteering for other liberal, progressive organizations that support ending domestic violence, advocating for mental health, women's rights, gun control, comprehensive sex education, socioeconomic and racial justice, diversity, equity, inclusion, and more. I enjoy cultural arts such as traveling domestically and internationally, learning about different languages and cultures, attending plays/theater and comedy shows, visiting museums, and going to concerts and hearing live music. I've traveled all over the United States, Canada, Mexico, Caribbean, and Asia including Taiwan, Japan, and Singapore. I'm physically active, love adventure, and enjoy experiencing nature and being outdoors. I love spending time in nature and exercising outdoors, especially hiking and ziplining. I've also done parasailing, flyboarding, canoeing, kayaking, sailing, cruising, whitewater rafting, and been given countless opportunities to experience many other awesome adventures I'd never received before. I absolutely live life to the fullest. This is the happiest I've ever been in my entire life, and I want to help others improve their lives and feel the same joy as I do. If I can do it, you can too! Even if life seems bleak and dark and you feel like quitting, DON'T GIVE UP! I promise you, life gets better; I'm living proof of that! I suffered through countless seemingly insurmountable adversities, barriers, challenges, and obstacles in my lifetime, but I also became a more empathetic, compassionate, loving, and kind human being. I'm a resilient and tenacious survivor and thriver. I'm an unstoppable force of nature to be reckoned with; there's absolutely nothing in the world that can stop me. My experiences have made me absolutely fearless: I fear nothing and no one. My long-term goals are to become a published best-selling author, a highly sought after public motivational speaker, and to give TED talks. I want to speak to audiences around the world about my journey, grit, perseverance, resilience, determination, strength, and tenacity, and to inspire and motivate others to do the same. Thanks so much for reading my story; feel free to share if you’d like and reach out to me if I can help! I attached a photo of Dr. Peter C. Ng, MD, FACS, FASMBS and me at UNC Rex Bariatrics Healthcare taken on Wednesday, October 1, 2024. (10-year surgiversary celebration of my duodenal switch, a bariatric surgery that Dr. Ng performed on Monday, October 6, 2014)

You got this. I was also active on here in the years following my sleeve. Had a life event occur that knocked me down. Stayed in a hole for the past few years....but started resuming normal life recently. Addressing the regain. That part is going well. Staying in my lane, been alcohol free the past 6+ years, working long hours and taking care of yard work & house chores on my days off.

I had my surgery a year ago now and I didn’t follow the pre op as stringent as they said just stopped drinking alcohol l and cut down on calories still eat meals but healthy 5 days before I had my last alcoholic drink 4 days before and the night before I had chicken breast and veggies with hummus it’s will be your last meal for a very long time enjoy it but don’t over eat I ate that meal as 5pm and my op was at 12:00 next day hope this helps your going on a journey nothing is going to prepare you for this but it’s well worth it

In your circumstance I would say that I am on antibiotics and not allowed alcohol. Then you could say you would have a sneaky taste of all the wine but not a big glass. I was allowed alcohol after surgery but stayed to low alcohol drinks for a while to test it on my body. Even now I would be smashed on a glass of wine. I keep my drinks long and slowly drink them. I have never dumped just gotten giddy mighty quick.

You can make your own poo pouri if you want different smells. DIY versions are out there. 1 tsp rubbing alcohol, 40 drops of essential oils, and then fill to the 3 oz mark on a spray bottle. Keep them in all your bathrooms. The oils they use for the poo pourri ingredients are bergamot essential oil, lemongrass essential oil and orange essential oils. However, use what you like. Other recommendations are lemongrass and peppermint, or lavender and orange. Heck, use pine around the holidays. Festive poop spray! Yup… I said it! Cost is under a buck depending on your oil supplier.

Isn’t there a carafe in the middle of the table to pour into? I didn’t have alcohol that early on, but I did go to a wine/food pairing event last month (3+years out) and it went ok as long as I only took one sip per kind of wine and ate the one bite of food paired with it. I would bring a shake in your bag in case you find out the hard way that you dump or have delayed blood sugar issues. Or, I would be tempted to say that you have strep throat or the flu, and skip the whole thing. I bailed out on a lot of stuff early on because of foamies and fear of dumping in public. It took about 9 months for me to figure out my new body. I also knew that the surgery was my one shot. (I kept singing Lin Miranda’s Not Going to Mess Up My One Shot.) I still take my health very seriously and don’t care about loosing face with friends/family. You’ve got some choices.