Search the Community

So today is my 3 week surgiversary. I have lost 22 pounds and have gone down one jean size so far. I am still eating soups and yogurts because of the tight feeling I get when I try to eat anything thicker. I have really started to want a glass of wine. Just to relax some nights. But Im scared. Everything I read says 3 months or more. Socially it has been weird too. Some people ask why Im not drinking alcohol anymore or at a meeting when lunch is served, I have to make excuses. One friend always declares how bad something tastes in my presence as to make me feel better about not being able to eat whatever she's eating. So there has been lots to get used to but at night when I get home and I see how nicely my cheek bones are becoming defined, I don't care about the excuses or the giant chocolate chip cookie I wasn't able to enjoy. I had my surgery in Monterrey, Mexico. I live (because of work) in Mexico City. I will be going home (to Chicago) in a week to see my family for the first time since the surgery. I know they are going to look me up and down for changes. Hopefully, they can see them right away. I fear hearing...you look the same. Anyway, these are just my random thoughts I have been having. Stuff I don't bother telling my friends because the novelty of my surgery and it's little issues has worn off for them. Happy holidays all!!

I'm 26. I got banded in January and I don't regret it one bit, although I do get paranoid a lot that I'm not losing weight fast enough. It's definately something you should do if need be and I agree, 15 thousand is a lot but you can find places that do it a lot cheaper. Mexico, I believe, is half that. I'm lucky because my province pays for the surgery and all you have to fork over is the money for the band itself, but if you do have to pay yourself, check out mexico, or even if you go on websites, they have specials in certain places. When I lose weight, I'm going on the HUGEST shopping spree. I can't wait. I think that's what I'm most excited about. As for alcohol, breaking up with Beer is painful but think about what you're gaining. A new life, a new body, a new plateau of self-respect and you'll just generally feel better about yourself. Plus - hard alcohol is still there. It's a little more expensive but if you pre-buy it in a liquor store, you are saving a lot of money. I can't wait to see my end results. It's worth everything I've had to give up.

Showoff? lol. Me? The woman who's been bouncing from 183 to 186 to 189 back to 183 since Labor Day? Believe me, I have done nothing BUT make the wrong decisions, apparently. (And, I know you were kidding, Marie:p .) I had company Labor Day weekend, from South Africa, so I wanted to share with her some of my favorites that she'd never heard of, such as Italian Cream cake. , Bluebell ice cream, so I gained 3 lbs that weekend. Then off on a tangent, these things just kept creeping into my behavior, so I've been bouncing merrily through the holidays making just enough wrong choices that I couldn't get past it. Thank goodness I could keep it under semi control or I'd be back to 200 by now. I have personally proven that yes, carbs/starches/refined sugars are indeed addictive and yes, once you stray into them the THIQ(technical term I learned in Drug and Alcohol counseling school) in our brains is definitely alerted and begins seeking more. This happens in heroin addicts, alcoholics and those of us who seek food as our drug of choice. It really does release endorphins that make us feel better, like love or hugs and well, being single, my endorphins know there is no love or hugs so when I feed it, it doesn't know moderation, it just WANTS more!! I am a victim of my own inner endorphin monster:( , but I'm working on it. I've put him in a cage with a tiny silicone band around his little pointed head. That way he's unconscious MOST of the time. Like an addict, he sometimes wakes up and his withdrawals cause him to do things he wishes he didn't do, but he does them anyway and holds my body hostage until he gets what he wants. As long as I'm vigilent about doing my exercise and drinking my water and eating my protein, I can keep him unconscious, but when I slip one wrong darn thing in there, he wakes up and goes searching for more. So, there's my confession. I, too, have a monster, just like Nancy and Lisa and Alex and Marie and Paula and Jack and Ryan and all of you other addicts. lol. I can't kill him, but I can darn sure cut off his oxygen supply long enough to regain control. I AIN'T NO QUITTER!!:banana

I have been on this since since the summer of 2013 and I am almost at 3 years post-op. I will admit that I read the posts that go wildly south when someone gets their feelings hurt, I giggle behind my computer, and for the most part I try not to engage, although there has been a time or two where I have felt the need to defend myself or someone else and I'm sure I upset people. I don't really care. I am who I am and this is the internet- if you don't like what I have to say, get over yourself and don't read it. I don't remember the last time a post actually offended me...usually I think the drama is kind of funny and some days I just skip over all the fighting posts to get to the end so I can reply to the original comment with something I hope is a little helpful. Past that, I try to respond to the "I ate chocolate cake at 2 weeks post-op" with "it's not going to kill you, medically you're fine, but that isn't going to help you lose weight" as opposed to "OMG you broke the rules, you're going to die and go to bariatric surgery hell". I didn't follow all the rules. I use straws. Straws will not freaking hurt you and the people who debate it because their surgeon told them not to use straws and they have no understanding of how the body actually works make me roll my eyes. lf you want to do drugs, unless you are ingesting them shortly before or after surgery, no, smoking pot and shooting smack have nothing to do with your stomach- you might die for totally different reasons, but it's not the sleeve that's going to kill you. Posts where people place their own judgement on the use of drugs and alcohol instead of medically assessing the situation with a knowledge of physiology exhaust me. Don't judge someone because they sin differently than you- give them an honest answer to their question and if you really don't know the answer from a medical perspective free from bias, don't make crap up- that is not helpful. If you want to eat junk, go for it- it's your success, not mine, but in the majority of "I ate this bad thing" posts on here are not actually going to physically hurt you when you are a few weeks post-op. You won't lose weight and you'll feel like garbage, but 95% of the time (again, within a reasonable time after surgery), medically these people are not hurting themselves any more than a regular person who eats stuff they shouldn't. If they want bacon and cake at 6 weeks post-op, have fun...who am I to tell them how to live their life? I don't personally have a problem with the site, although I suppose it is probably because not much offends me. In the three years I have been on here, there have been two comments from veterans that I specifically remember made me feel the need to reply in my defense, and both times what could have been escalated into an actual internet fight, never did because two adults were engaged in a debate and they then moved on. I happen to really like both of these people and I think they bring a lot of value to the discussion- just because they don't always agree with me doesn't mean that they are wrong, that they should be censored, or that their opinion is not valuable. If people want to be trolls and say mean things, then ignore them, the way you do in real life, but if someone doesn't agree with you, it's not a personal attack, it's just their right to have a different opinion. Lively debate is fun when adults act like adults and participate appropriately, however when people start calling each other names and crying about their feelings being hurt, I feel like I'm in pre-school and someone stole their legos. Be a big girl or boy and go take your damn legos back. Don't be a victim, but don't be a jerk. I have zero interest in a world or a discussion area where everyone gets along...that degree of groupthink adds no value, I just think the problem exists when people get bent out of shape and respond emotionally instead of rationally. If you don't like what someone says, let them know or move on...why cry about it? I like BariatricPal, I like most of the people that I regularly engage with, and I don't much care if people don't like me. I am an anonymous person behind a computer...if you don't agree with me, cool, let's debate, but if it gets to a point where you are sincerely upset and can no longer engage in conversation like a mature adult....there is this magical "x" on your browser. Use it.

chocolate for dinner is a bad idea for sure, but I think a piece of chocolate (especially dark) every now and then is fine! I get sent tons of European goodies for Christmas from my family in the UK, and though I allow my husband to eat most of them, I refuse to completely avoid them. I am down to 135 lbs too On top of that, I don't avoid alcohol- they sent me some nice brandy and I have one glass of that a couple times a week with my husband. I'm of the opinion that so long as you enjoy the naughty stuff in moderation, it's good for your soul. What got me to being obese was not having the ability to "moderate"- I'd go through an entire box of chocolates in a day, along with massive portions of everything else. I am happy I can no longer go nuts, but I don't really care to over indulge now, even if I could.

wait we cant have liquor until 1 YEAR post op??????? Im about to be 1 month post op and I plan on drinking on my man's bday this week...I really hope I'll be allowed 2 atleast drink a glass of something cuz dats all I want..im not a heavy drinker so im not dieing. I only drink when I go 2 parties and clubs but if I have 2 wait 1 year then partyin is gonna really blow...I gave up alcohol on the 4th of july (first day of pre-op) and that was HARD cuz there was nothing but liquor and fireworks.. I can live without drinkin beer but no liquor for 1 year sucks...guess turnin 21 this year meant nothing :biggrin:

Rubbing alcohol took it right off.

I chose to sever ties with my best friend of 7 years. She is diabetic, will not take care of herself, and can't stop eating or drinking alcohol, I had tried to help her on numerous occasions, I told her please don't end up like an ex of mine that almost died from diabetes because he would not take care of himself, I also asked her to please stop drinking, for her own health, and I told her that she was seriously hurting herself. At the end of our relationship, she was the biggest I had ever seen her, seriously, she was bigger then me. After my lap band, our relationship changed a lot, It seemed like her whole LIFE was centered around getting food, eating food, or securing food for later. I couldn't eat much of anything after my surgery, and at restaurants when I would go to eat with her, she would try to make me eat. She was trying to sabotage me, and I actually let her one time. I was so angry that I let her make me feel that bad, that I ended our friendship. If she wants to be fat and unhappy, let her be, sometimes you cannot help people help themselves.

My problem with these programs is that they are all so religion based. I personally don't believe in god, but why shouldn't I get some support too? My husband was having trouble with alcohol awhile back, and I made him go to AA. He went once and never went back because all they talked about was god. I wish there was a way to get support for your issues without having to believe in god, I mean we are still humans even if we aren't christians.

My surgery is July 1st. I am really excited. My biggest concern is the recovery time for return to work. I am trying to prep my body for surgery by eating healthy, trying to exercise, and cutting out alcohol. I have told many of my friends about my surgery. Everyone has been supportive so far. They just want me to be healthy.

Dear NAK77BRR, First of all, let me offer you my sympathies on your Mom passing away. My Mom is also one of my best friends. She is 90 now, and although still healthy and in her own home, I know she won't be around forever. I dread the day she is no longer there for me! Secondly, Congratulations on making a life changing choice! Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy is truly a Life Changer! I was overweight ALL my life! I have been to every weight loss group, taken part in every new program, tried EVERY diet ever published in the Women's magazines. In short, I have DONE IT ALL (several times!), and NEVER with any lasting success! I joined (and when I got bored, quit) Weight Watchers 17 times! Every single time I lost at least 40-60 pounds. But every time when I quit, I gained it all back, plus a couple more pounds. It was so frustrating. I went from being mildly overweight (5'7" and 175 lbs) to being morbidly obese (258 lbs) after about 35 years of weight loss efforts. I thought about getting skinny 24/7. It consumed me, but I was always paralyzed with inaction. I could never really take a step towards doing something permanent. Finally I needed surgery for a hernia, and went to my 1st cousin, who is a general surgeon, but has had bariatric surgery himself. He is now specializing in bariatric surgery, specifically Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomies. When he was getting ready to do my hernia repair I asked him how hard it would be to slip a Lap Band in while he was repairing the hernia. He told me he didn't do Lap Bands anymore. He gave me all the stats about how they didn't have a very good success rate long term. He told me about VSG and highly suggested it. Unfortunately, my insurance wouldn't pay $0.01 towards bariatric surgery. So even though Steve (my cousin) offered to do my surgery free of charge, I chose to go to Mexico to have it done. (I would still have had to pay for hospital and anesthesia charges myself, which he estimated would be $15-20,000!) So off to Mexico I went last summer (June 18th) where I underwent a Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy. Although my hospital experience was not perfect, I have had fantastic results (and no complications)! Just last week (or maybe it was the week before) I hit the 100 pounds lost mark. I have another 8-18 pounds to loose to reach my goal. Originally I wanted to weigh around 150, now I am thinking of adjusting my goal downwards to 140. (Currently weigh 158 lbs) I too was a boarderline diabetic. I had high cholesterol, high blood pressure, was on anti-inflammatories for my joint aches and pains, bad environmental allergies, horrible fatigue, my life just sucked! When I was 47 I had to have a total hip replacement because I had worn out my right hip socket. My surgeon said if was largly due to being overweight my entire life. (Thankfully my left hip is healthy!) My knees were getting bad, and I was afraid that bilateral knee replacement was in my near future! Since the surgery and my weight loss, I am off my cholesterol meds, I am no longer boarderline diabetic (off that medication), my blood pressure is normal (off that medication), my joints don't ache all the time, (off the anti-inflammatory medication). And for some strange reason, my allergies are SO much improved. I quit taking my sinus meds and using the nasal spray that I used for the environmental allergies. I feel so much better, Have tons of energy, and can't tell you how much my life has improved. When I was discussing with my husband why I wanted to proceed with the surgery, I told him I wanted to be healthier, to live longer. (He was AGAINST the surgery 100%!) I told him looking better was just "frosting on the cake". (His argument against the surgery is that he loved me no matter how I looker.) But I have to say, it is Tasty Frosting!!! I LOVE being able to shop in any department store for clothes. I love clothes and I love dressing nice and looking good! I also love that I no longer am limited to shopping in Lane Bryant, Catherine's, Fashion Bug and Dress Barn. I go to all the trendy stores and love it that I can fit into a regular size! Never in my life have I been able to do that before! It is SUCH a HIGH!!! I can't stop looking in the mirror, and it never ceases to thrill me how I look now! I have to admit, there are down sides to being a smaller size. I gave away most of the clothes that were to big for me. I am now at a point where I am going to have to give my clothes to Goodwill, or find smaller friends, as I am smaller than all my friends, and have no one left to give my clothes to as I continue to lose! Also, I am a cheap date. We used to go to Sam's Club or costco on Saturday mornings for our groceries and then out to lunch. Now when Bill and I go shopping at Sam's or Costco, I only need six to eight bites of the samples they are giving away, and I am full. So when he wants to impress me, Bill takes me to Sam's on Saturday morning and feeds me their sample bites. After that I am to full to go out for lunch! Have also found out that I can't drink as much alcohol as I could pre op. I have to limit myself to one glass of wine or one mixed drink. So am REALLY a cheap date! Seriously, I think you are making a wonderful choice for a healthier life style. Best of luck to you. Please continue to frequent this web site and post how you are doing. Everybody here is great at cheering you on, offering encouragement and advice when you need it. Looking forward to Welcoming you to The Loser's Bench! (Sorry this turned into such a long epistle!) Again, welcome and Congratulations! Kathy D (alias Helen the Cat)

My insurance and surgeon required it. They're checking for things like, do you have the commitment to make the necessary changes to be successful, are you doing this for your health or someone else? Tendencies to transfer food addiction to drugs, alcohol, sex, etc, suicidal thoughts, etc. They want to make sure you understand it's not a "quick fix" but a lifetime commitment. Not a big deal at all. Several paper\pencil tests and an hour interview. Mine didn't require anything post op and I've not felt like I needed therapy, (though I was prepared for that if I felt like I needed it.)

Wow. Sorry you are struggling. Don't know who told you 3-500cals. That might have been true at 3-4 weeks? But I think the biggest majority of us have cals during the losing mode of 600-850cals/day--very loose average. Maintenance for me is around 1000cals. Even at 900cals my loss if painfully slow negligible. But, we are all different and have different TEE (Total Energy Expenditure). It could be so many things: hormones, medications, genetics, nutritional components, calories, sleep, stress, physical activity/exercise, age, alcohol/caloric drink consumption. You've lost 17 pound in about 12 weeks. That's about 1.4lbs/week which is a little on the low side. The average weekly weight loss is 2-4lbs in the early losing phases. Are you maximizing everything YOU can contribute to this journey? (ie everything within your control) What does your doctor say about your progress/situation?

I use Ragu Original with Mushrooms and just add my own fresh spices along with orange, yellow and red bell peppers. It only has 11 carbs per 1/2 cup serving, but a quick google search for low carb spaghetti sauce shows Hunts No Sugar Added Italian Style Sauce has even fewer carbs per 1/2 c serving. Hunt's No Added Sugar Italian Style Sauce Serving Size 1/2 cup Calories 35 Total Fat 0g Saturated Fat 0g Trans Fat 0g Cholesterol 0mg Sodium 610mg Total Carbohydrates 6g Dietary Fiber 2g Sugar 3g Sugar Alcohol 0g Protein 1g Ingredients: tomato puree (water, tomato paste), Water less than 2% of: salt, soybean oil, dehydrated onions, carrot fiber, spices, citric acid, xanthan gum, sucralose, acesulfame, potassium, natural flavor

I think you'll do it. I'm a couple of months away from surgery with insurance requirements and am completely resigned to doing this and sometimes am down-right excited. My group gave me a book called, The Skinny about Weight Loss and it addresses some of your concerns. I've told my friends and am stopping alcohol, trying to get to 62 oz of water a day and so on.....I think once I made the decision, told people, and then pretty much developed an attitude about just pressing on and not worrying over the people not especially on board with my decisions. I think having a LOT of requirements beforehand is a very good thing. This week I'll go to my first Sleeve Support group. I, too, rely on these posts for information. They are so comforting and I've learned so much! You'll do the right thing. If it's right for you, tell your friends. I didn't ask for support or approval, but told them it's what I've decided is right for me ---and that after a LONG time considering this! Good luck!

Hi everyone, I am coming to ask all who has been sleeved if my fears are irrational or not normal. did you have these same fears? I am so scared of not waking up after surgery I am scared the surgery wont work. I am scared I will wake up and for whatever reason, come to find out the docs had to stop surgery and I am not sleeved. I am scared that after going thru surgery, my body will just have a major freak out and I will have a heart attack and die or that my body wont like the changed and just give out. I have paroxysmal atrial fibrillation (heart arrhythmia that causes the heart to quiver instead of beat. It can cause blood to pool in the atria of the heart which rises my chance of stroke by 5 fold. I have an "attack" about once a year. otherwise im fine). my cardiologist has cleared me for surgery. I have zero other health issues. I am 28, and very healthy. im just obese with my a-fib. I have never smoked and my last alcoholic drink I had was when I was 19. (not one word of a lie). for a big person I have oretty good stamina when it comes to exercise also. my cardiologist wrote a clearance letter for my surgeons and anesthesiologists. in the letter is says : "Aliesha's chances for serious perioperative cardiac complication is 1% and her Lee Index for a serious post operative cardiac complication is 0.4% equivalent to low" I know that pretty much sums up that I should be ok for surgery, but I cant help now that surgery is 2 weeks away, be absolutely terrified. TERRIFIED. I just want to live a life where I am healthy, lighter, and free from this prison. But I have to ask..........what is the risk? is it worth it?? Any insight would be much appreciated. Thank you.

My dh can eat a ton and stay thin and athletic while I can eat a small amount and get heavy. Metabolism is so vastly different in some people. I have a lot of heavy and thin friends and I don't really think of them in terms of weight so much as that is just who they are . . . kind of like some people have big noses and some have small noses. I do find myself having a bias when people blatantly disregard reason and do self destructive things. Whether it is overindulging in alcohol, food, drugs on a regular basis I seem to get upset. I am not talking about an occasional issue but a sustained issue over extended periods.

Please be very careful with the alcohol. I know everyone's doc and nut give out different guidelines but I am pretty certain that this early on alcohol can put us at risk for ulcers. I know all to well the call of our forbidden temptations but we really must take care our stomachs and heed the warnings (heartburn, discomfort, etc)

Well done to you for noticing this in yourself. It is something I sometimes worry about. I know I can choose to not drink, I have not had alcohol over extended periods of time and been perfectly okay. What worries me is that I don't want to not drink. I like to drink. It is scary enough that I think at times it is enough to keep me sober. Which I know makes little sense! The trick for me is, I think, telling others. Being really honest about wanting to not drink and seeking support in that. Which may mean that others don't drink so it is a big ask. But these are your friends and family, they want what is best for you so I hope they can support you to not drink through this period.

Yep. This happens a lot, but you have to take to heart the fact that the power is in your hands. Just because people are drinking socially doesn't mean you need to, so do not try to justify the situation to yourself like that. If you have a problem with alcohol you've got no business drinking.

Ofcourse it is not going to help! It's like saying, "here child your black you need to bleach your skin to be pretty" or "hey there sinora being mexican is worse than being american, just hate yourself for having an accent" I find all of this untasteful and alarming. I have 2 daughter's and by god if they put those things on us like cattle, those label's i'm going to washington with my fat ass and telling mr. big man that if he could be an alcoholic and addicted to cocaine and be our leader then why cant someone whom has issues be themselves. hell we KNOW what we are. we are not stupid and it is not like we are not trying!:mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad:

Pre-op here. Just saw my nutritionist today. My surgeon has insisted on no carbonated drinks EVER, for life. There goes champagne. And White Claws. I asked why, and he said that consistent intake will expand your pouch. So I’m thinking I’m limited to like a champagne toast at the rare wedding and nothing else. my nutritionist told me however that alcohol is not off limits once in stage four of eating, just drink it slowly and try it at home. Get a Designated Driver if you’re out. Try to get something low in sugar to avoid dumping, like a shot diluted in ice with a lemon twist, or the old classic, a vodka cranberry.

Hi: I think that those that are under 30 have more social committments and they go out alot more than older people. Because of this, they also have more occasions that can involve alcohol and food. Maybe I'm wrong. My doctor told me that his under 30 patients are less successful than the older patients. I can only assume this is based on his experience. You know the old saying about assuming, so I probably shouldn't make any assumptions. I think he and his partner have done about 300+ bands. Perhaps this is too small of a number to use as a base. There are probably more stats somewhere on this board that relate to this. They have a great support system and follow up at their group, so I would think that if the Under 30 group is less succesful it's not because of the effort made on the part of their practice. Maybe people in their 40's and 50's are in more of a hurry to get to their goal weight than someone in their 20's. I hope that everyone succeeds that gets banded. I love my band and my new flat tummy. Sue

Need some moral support and feedback from some of the older slivers:-). I'm 18 months out and have put on five lbs (coming out of the holidays). Trying to get my head back in the game; however this is bribing up old junk!!! How many calories a day are folks eating and what is the Quality of food? Alcohol? Just need some reality checks so I can refocus...Thanks

Have heard of this before. Never met anyone that has tried it though. Hmmmmm don't need the extra O2 but could just as easily use a nebulizer. Hmmmm may have to experiment this weekend ;P Guess as long as it's an alcohol without all the sugary mixers it wouldn't hurt. Otherwise I could see the sugars making an easy breeding ground for bacteria in the lungs. Ewwwww. Talk about catching your death of Pneumonia. Jeez. Think I'll wait for further research to come in on the topic. Looks to be a cool novelty though.