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I would ask her what specifically does she think will improve if you lose weight but I am pretty confident she wouldn’t be able to come up With one thing. . She sounds like one of those people that does cookie cutter medicine and it’s better ypu find that out now then when you have an issue that is outside of the box because we are all unique And she obviously doesn’t see you that way.

I'm curious if anyone else decided to hold off on dating until after their weight loss surgery. I've decided to wait six months post-op before I start dating again. I feel like I need to focus on my weight loss journey and ensure I'm in a good place physically and mentally before diving back into the dating scene.

I think you are doing amazing!! You don’t have your weight and surgery stuff filled in on your ticker so I can’t see the pounds or anything but I can see a significant difference In your pic and that’s what really matters anyways. it’s hard to patiently wait for the pounds to creep down but once the year or so is over it will actually feel like it went by pretty fast. Just keep doing what you are doing. You will get there!!

I was the opposite in a way, I blindly went into the operation having being told the standard bit about possible complications but was confident in the team and was excited to start a new life so didn't over think it it all. Then suffered severe post op complications, spending months in hospital and having numerous procedures and only finished treatments 10 months after original op date BUT all of that said if your medical team are happy you are a suitable candidate I think it is worth it. You have done good work already to get to where you are and you sound like you could reach the 65lb loss yourself over time but the surgery would be a boost to that and if you work with the tool correctly over the years you should be able to maintain. That is how I looked at it, I had no problem being strict and loosing weight but it would just go back on and I would be on a yo-yo cycle. Plus who is to say what will be in a year, maybe your surgical team will change and you have to start the process again, maybe insurance coverage changes..... Travel wise I haven't had any issues, been to the US and other EU countries in the last few months and usually been able to find something suitable to eat though I always carry a few protein bars and powdered protein coffee with me just to be sure I meet my goals. A bonus on the travel is that I now fit comfortably in my plane seats and can do a little sprint through the airports if running late With regards to waiting for your wife to conceive, not sure about that one but recovery time is only a few weeks for 'strenuous' activities and wouldn't it be great to be over the surgery and well on the road to a fitter healthier you when she becomes pregnant so you can help her out more?

Your bmi is 30.45. I looked it up. And if you lose just 3 pounds you would be 29.95 (below 30) Do you know the prescribing criteria for that drug.according to several websites your iBMI has to be over 27. From 27-29 you must have a comorbidity. Only at 30 can they prescribe it without a weight related issue. Unless your heart issue is considered one of those comorbid issues that losing weight would help with then you just need to lose three pounds and she will have to leave you alone. lol. I joke but my point is that you are so close that even if BMI was accurate representation for everyone for her to be pushing this is just so absolutely absurd. I mean three pounds could be a bowel movement. It would be one thing if you were driving this but for her to push it under these circumstances doesn’t make any sense to me. This is copied from the package insert posted on drugs.com Phentermine Hydrochloride is a sympathomimetic amine anorectic indicated as a short-term adjunct (a few weeks) in a regimen of weight reduction based on exercise, behavioral modification and caloric restriction in the management of exogenous obesity for patients with an initial body mass index greater than or equal to 30 kg/m 2, or greater than or equal to 27 kg/m 2 in the presence of other risk factors (e.g., controlled hypertension, diabetes, hyperlipidemia). Oh and also, I took that stuff when I was like 19 and I had no history of heart issues in myself or my family and they still made me do an ekg so I hope she at the very least planned to do that?? I totally understand why you are mad I would be too

Thank you!!! I guess I'll just ride it out and see where it takes me. I honestly didn't think about the regain later on, so maybe it's not a bad thing if I go 10 or even 12 pounds below my goal weight. Thanks for the advice and suggestions!!! Much appreciated

One of my favorite resources is Dr. Weiner's videos (as well as his book The Pound of Cure and his weekly podcast). He talks about the type of food we eat being more important than the number of calories we eat. Here is one video that I watch probably once a month just to get it into my head. But he has hundreds of videos, so I encourage you to check out all of the playlists on his channel. Having said that, there's a good chance you're in a stall as opposed to being done. Your BMI is low enough now that you're approaching "normal weight" and weight loss at that point gets really slow and difficult. But it doesn't mean you can't do it!

Estrogen is stored in your fat. As you lose weight it is released into your blood stream. This additional estrogen or estrogen flush causes your emotions to go haywire (like major PMT) & changes to your menstrual cycle (heavier/lighter, more or less frequent periods). Plus in general, this is a pretty emotional & stressful time. The surgery, the reduced eating, the structured eating, etc. all can mess with your emotions too. It does settle eventually though when differs person to person.

Ideally, maintenance is achieved when you are living the lifestyle (in terms of intake and movement) that you can foreseeably do for the "rest if your life"...even more ideally, is if you can adjust your lifestyle as your circumstances change... when u get to goal weight, you can start upping ur calories until weight loss stops. you may find you go under ur goal weight by a bit, but more likely than not, you will regain a few lbs until you stabilize (at, below, or over goal weight...u won't know until u know, unfortunately). lots of us on here worried about losing too much weight...unless u have medical conditions, this worry doesn't last long lol. i got to about 20 lbs below goal weight at my lowest. regained about 10 of those extra lbs within a year. and while i thought i was too small when i was at actual goal, i don't think that anymore, even weighing 10 lbs less. long story short, if u can leave the worry at the door, do it. Unless u are sick or your med team is worried, just enjoy the ride! you look awesome, you look like u must awesome. bask in your awesomeness!

Definitely try and get some sleep! 😂 This is definitely the case! I know myself that I need to focus a little bit more on my water intake - then hopefully I shall feel a bit more energy! I have been back to the gym in the last week and started walking more, and I will be having a personal trainer come the 1st August so I know I am going to be putting my weight loss & health first! Which is surprisingly exciting haha.

Had my consult at Banner University Medical center in Tucson. The team seems really nice and eager for you to succeed. My first appt with the dietician is Jan 29th and is supposed to be about 90 minutes. Lots of tests I need to have completed asap; sleep study, cardiology clearance, endoscopy, barium swallow, psych eval, chest X-ray, and a ton of labs. Gotta complete the 6 month supervised diet and lose 10% of my weight throughout the 6 months. They want to see a little each month and not a lot at real quick. I weighed 344 yesterday and they want me at 310 before surgery. I shared this in a Facebook forum and the 1st comment was, "Really, how do they figure you can lose that much in 6 mos? Wow. Good luck with that!" (Nothing like a little encouragement right off the bat! 😬 ) I replied that it's only 34 lbs & I need to lose 6 lbs a month. She said if she could lose 6 lbs a month she wouldn't need surgical help! I looked at her profile & it turns out she's a failed ESG from September because 'she likes food too much'. BUT now it's in my head that maybe I can't lose the 34 lbs in time. I'm definitely ready to get this going! I have studied this for so many years! I'm super excited to have finally taken this step & have saved money for the last several months to cover my deductible & most of my Out of Pocket max. The fat girl in me decided I needed a food funeral, so I had my last ever buffet yesterday. I hope this 6 months goes by quickly! I'm ready to feel better & move better. My knees & back need a break LOL! If y'all have any tips for losing the 34 lbs in 6 months, please share them. I know low carb/sugar free & keto..... but I've obviously never been successful with them or I wouldn't be this big.

I'm supposed to get down to 111kg (244lbs) I started at 123KG (271lbs). I've currently lost 4kg (9lbs) since July 15th. My weight has been fluctuating between 118kg and 120 kg for about a week now. I think the other thing about the 12 week diet is I am an NHS patient so it's taxpayer funded and it's a teaching hospital so they are more strict on guidelines before surgeries but also I think they are trying new techniques. I was also asked is I wanted to take part in a trial about dental health on this new pre-op diet which requires everything from blood to a stool sample. I don't mind taking part except now the pretty Spanish periodontist knows I poop!

I've been struggling to keep up with the diet so I thought I would try to focus on all the things that I hope to accomplish from the surgery so that I can remind myself what better times I have to come. Not just big things like better health but also the smaller things that I think are just as important. 1st: Sleep! I want to lose enough weight to sleep well. I don't have sleep apnoea yet, but my doctor says I'm at risk because of my weight and even without the sleep apnoea, it's still really hard to get comfortable and lying on my back definitely affects my breathing and my spine. 2nd: Activity! I ride my bike everywhere and I enjoy it, but I would love to do other things without pain in my knees. I go to concerts a lot and usually need to stand because no one sits at rock concerts (unless it was like when I went to see the Scorpions last month when the average age of music fan was 56 so it was all seats). Standing for a long time hurts and then I can't enjoy the concert as much as I was hoping. Maybe be able to lose the ebike and get an "acoustic" bike. 3rd: Fashion! Being able to shop at cheaper stores. Plus size clothes comes with a plus size price tag. Years ago, (teenage years) I bought a t-shirt that was a size 16. They had the same t-shirt in the "plus size section" (also a size 16 and the exact same size) and it was £2 extra for the same amount of fabric. And as someone with a more alternative sense of fashion, not a lot of plus size clothes have skulls and flames and vampires and things like that. They tend to make plus size clothes with puppies and kitties and cutesy things. There's nothing cutesy about me.

Hello. I am 6 weeks out and down 41 pounds as of today (which includes a 2 weeks low carb preop diet where I lost 13 pounds). I went from a BMI of 39 to 33 and will be 32 with one more pound loss. I was 235 when I had my sleeve and lost down to 167 but I stalled there for a few months and then started gaining it all back plus 23 pounds. Aside from a few blisters that are slowing my walking down I feel fantastic. I have more energy and motivation then I have had in years. I’m exercising (walking 5-7 miles a day) and making all my meals from scratch. I am also planning to start yoga the week after next when I am 8 weeks. The NP actually said 6 weeks is okay but I’ve never done it so I’m afraid it will be strenuous and I’d rather be safe than sorry. I did have a pretty tough recovery. I was in the hospital for 5 days because they couldn’t get my pain to a level that was manageable with meds they were willing to send me home on. Well once I finally passed gas like 5 times I was fine without any pain meds but it still was a far tougher recovery than my sleeve. Not sure why but with my sleeve I was home and out front the next day and asked my husband to pass me the basketball because I forgot I had surgery and that was with no pain meds. This time they also took my gall bladder out though because it looked bad. I wasn’t expecting it because I never had any symptoms so we didn’t discuss it but the post op pathology came back that I had gall stones so it saved me from another surgery I guess. I suggest discussing some of the things like that which may pop up during your surgery and what your wishes are since they can’t wake you up to ask. I was kinda surprised that mine went ahead and did it but the NP said his thought was that it already looked bad and that the anticipated quick weight loss was going to only make it worse. Anyways, I took it easy for the full 6 weeks this time. My floors have never been so disgusting. I have done laundry because I have the pedestals and dishes and that’s about it. My hubby has freshened up the bathrooms and changed the sheets but other than that it’s all waited for me. I confess that it’s still waiting. I am supposed to be cleaning now but I sat down for lunch and got started on here 😂 My surgeon does not believe in resizing the stomach so my surgery was only on my intestines. This made my recovery in terms of food tolerance go way quicker. I am back to normal food already. I had raw veggies in my spring rolls even and that was fine. Of course ask your team before you do it. I didn’t have any food tolerance issues after my sleeve either though. I have not had any of the diarrhea that they warned me about. They said some of their SADI patients had it for 3 months. One had it so bad it interfered with work. I have been eating very healthy though. I was actually constipated In the beginning and even with the stool softeners I had to do milk of magnesia a couple of times but now I am able to eat a bit more fiber in my diet so I am trying to cut back the stool softeners slowly. if you don’t log your food now I suggest the Baritastic app. You can log EVERYTHING there. You food, weight, measurements, exercise, moods, even your bowel movements and you can also set notifications for your vitamins (although I don’t hear them so I have alarms set as well). I really like looking at the trends and graphs to see how I am progressing. A fitness watch is really good too. I had a much older Apple Watch that I dusted off and it makes it so much more fun to do my walking and stuff because you can see how fast it adds up. I never exercised with my sleeve but I talked on the phone with my friend the first few times and then my husband got me these awesome headphones that don’t go in or over your ear so you can still hear traffic while listening to music. They are called “bone phones”. Now I just put on my music and take off walking. Makes the time go by so much faster. I wear them all day actually. You can listen to music on low and hold a conversation with someone even. I also started posting here and attending the in person support group meetings before my surgery this time so post surgery I have had lots of support. I go to check in with my NP more often than they generally require too because I have pretty severe anxiety and that comes with lots of questions and I just need the reassurance that everything is okay. Don’t forget to take photos and do measurements before you start your preop diet and again before surgery and set reminders in your calendar for once a month or so to keep doing them. And if you want to use that Baritastic app you can also keep track of your protein and water on there so familiarize yourself with it early. I kinda rambled but I tried to cover everything I could think of that may be helpful.

Must meet one of the following three criteria: 1. Must have a minimum body mass index (BMI) of > 30 with a diagnosis of Diabetes Mellitus. 2. Must have a BMI of > 35-39 and must have at least one of the following conditions: a. Degenerative joint disease of major weight bearing joint(s). The member must be a candidate for joint replacement surgery if weight loss is achieved. b. Other rare chronic conditions (for example, pseudo tumor cerebri) in which there is medical evidence that bariatric surgery is medically necessary and that the benefits of bariatric surgery outweigh the risk of surgical mortality. 3. Must have a minimum BMI of > 40 Here is their wording. I’m obviously number 3 I’m just worried it’s a case by case basis and they won’t approve me.

I'm with you on ALL of that. I was in a 28/30 and 5x in clothing and size 10 in rings and 11w in shoes. When I could even find anything in my size, it was expensive, ugly, and not in style at all. I hated it so much. Now, I'm in a size 12 and Large in clothing, size 5 ring, and size 10M in shoes. So much easier to find clothes in my size that are cute, fit better, look better, and priced WAY better. I can shop sales and clearance, I can go thrifting and know I'll find stuff, I can shop in ANY store and not be embarrassed or disappointed. Activity is so key. I couldn't move around without a cane before, and even then it was so hard. I was out of breath after the smallest tasks. Now I go on 10 and 12 mile hikes, I work out and do core/strength/weight training, and I can go horseback riding (just did that last weekend and it was AWESOME to be within the weight limits) or anything else I want to do. Sleeping is so much better now. I can sleep in any position, I don't snore anymore, and I don't wake up with headaches like I use to. I was told I needed a cpap but I didn't want one, and I suffered because of it. Don't need one now!! And of course, my health has drastically improved. No more high cholesterol, high blood pressure, inflammation meds for my joint pain, or diabetes. Instead of constantly being anemic, it stays low normal, which is huge for me. All my labs consistently come back perfect and normal. It's a whole new life now, and even though I went through SO MUCH to get here, I would do it all again in a heartbeat

It sort of makes sense? A nutritionist I saw years back (not program related) told me that she often starts people on higher calorie counts and then as the weight loss slows down, that's when she restricts them further to keep the momentum going. These days, I take it all with a grain (or seven) of salt because everyone reacts differently to foods / calories / etc. Different strokes.

🤔 Definitely food for thought. You brought up some very good points. I just am leery of adding fruit and or veggies since I am extremely carb sensitive. Perhaps I'll slowly introduce a few more. Its just difficult to add something without removing protein since I'm restricted to 800 calories and fruit adds a lot more calories. Tbh, I don't know why I'm hung up on reaching my goal, perhaps its because I'm very goal-centric, if I don't reach my goal to me I'll feel as if I've failed, even when I haven't. I've always up until the last ten years weighed 105-108, so I felt 120 was reasonable for my small frame and height. Plus, I'm still classified as over weight! I am still heavy for my height. Lastly, I still have quite a bit of fat on my small frame (its not All just skin) so, if I'm being honest I do need to lose the rolls on my stomach and arms. I know the difference between skin excess and skin with fat. Perhaps 140 would be a better goal..I don't know. I do understand I'll never be what I was, but I feel perhaps it was the doctors and dietician's jobs to tell me 120 wouldn't work based on my starting BMI, my age etc, and explain reasonable surgical expectations - they didn't which is why I assumed it was obtainable. Thank you for giving me lots to think about, either way I still have 6 months before I am put on maintenance or my weight loss is set as I was told by the doctor. I appreciate your insights. Oh and no, I've never had a DEXA scan. I've never heard of it. Also, its about time that gymnast got off my back - no more freeloading!

Hello @BigDane looks like we Will be pretty much be going through the stages together. How is the preop diet going? I was told by the nurse that since he didn’t mention a preop diet I just needed to do a two day liquid diet but last time he had me do a week long liver shrink diet first. I’m just going to do that to be safe. The smaller the liver is the safer the surgery is with the added bonus it’s less weight to lose after.

@BlueParis I don't blame you for wanting some sun! We've finally had some nice weather here and it makes such a difference. We're in that little sliver of time where it's nice and not too hot. I know that in another few weeks I'm likely to be desperate for air-conditioning, but today I have the windows open and a light blanket on my lap and it's perfect. I hope you get better weather soon. I had a great opportunity on Wednesday night to join in on a Q&A session with Dr. Matthew Weiner. It was a small group, like four of us, and we just got to ask questions. I filled him in on my weight loss so far, including highest weight, how much I lost with diet changes, how much with the pre-op diet, and then the much slower weight loss since surgery. He told me that even though it seems slower, he thought I was pretty much on track. Apparently when you're calculating weight loss expectations for surgery, it's better to use your highest weight (especially if it's relatively recent, I think) because it's more realistic. So, for example, if I use 251lbs as my start, it suggests a final weight of 166. If I use 238 lbs (the weight I was on day one of the pre-op diet), it suggests 157 lbs, and if I use 223 (the day before surgery weight), it suggests 147 lbs. Dr. Weiner said 147 lbs is most likely not a realistic goal because I wasn't really, metabolically, a 223 lb person when I had surgery. I was a 251 lb person who had lost 28 lbs, and that distinction is important. Honestly, seeing this range of outcomes makes me feel better about where I'm at. I don't have a particular weight I "must" hit as a goal. I'm happy losing weight in a sustainable way and being healthier, whatever that ends up being. I just wanted to have a goal in my mind, and I was starting to worry I was not going to succeed because it's been so slow. But, even though I've barely lost anything since mid-April, I've still lost 50 lbs since last summer, and that should be something to celebrate!

Thank you @ShoppGirl @Bypass2Freedom and @JennyBeez for you lovely, thoughtful words. I really do appreciate your comments. The clothes came - the shift dress that I thought would be OK is massive and the jumpsuit that I thought would be too tight fits perfectly so go figure 🤷‍♀️ Annoying though when you buy the same size from the same brand and there are massive discrepancies. So, dress is going back and I’ve ordered a couple of things from the sale at Roman for less than half the price of the dress I’m sending back 🙂 @ShoppGirl I have to say that my hubby is being fully supportive. There are obviously times when I want to smother him with a pillow but not over this. He is onboard with what I am trying to do so no complaints from me over that. He just wants me to feel good about myself and get some confidence back I think. I did take your advice and ordered some new, dressy shoes (backless so if my feet do shrink again, it won’t matter!) I hope that the metabolic changes from the op really do kick in and work in tandem with the other changes we make. I know the op is a positive thing that we’re doing both for our physical and emotional wellbeing. @Bypass2Freedom Definitely seek food to ‘soothe’ when in meltdown mode. It is difficult to lose weight and keep if off. I hate, with a passion, those that patronisingly say “oh, you just have to eat less and move more”…OH REALLY?? 🤬🤬🤬 Well tell my metabolism that you arsehole. Continually dieting just screws your metabolism up, I’m sure of it. I’m hoping that the op acts as an internal reset button so my body stops acting against me and works with me for a while. I do know I need to stop being so harsh on myself…old habits and all that 🙃 @JennyBeez Yes, to camouflage, yes to self-sabotage. I know what started my weight issues and disordered eating. Food was used as a punishment when I was growing up (amongst other things) I won’t go in to detail as I don’t want to trigger anyone but I have undergone counselling etc. I did lose approx 100lbs around 12 years ago and then immediately started with Rheumatoid Arthritis which threw a massive spanner in to my works! My focus went from weight and gym visits to meds, hospital visits, X-rays pain and tests. Weight went back on, Osteoarthritis decided to join the party and then recently Fibromyalgia because why not?? Did I choose any of that? NO! Looking at it all dispassionately, I can see that I was angry with my body - I’d done the major weight loss, I was at the gym 5 days a week because I loved it, I was happy with myself and then I felt that I was kicked in the teeth without rhyme or reason. I know that WLS won’t make everything go away but hopefully it will make things easier to handle and get me moving once again. I miss the gym like you wouldn’t believe and I’m just hoping that I can get going to it once again for my physical and mental health. Working on my mindset is definitely a work in progress.

Nausea, vomiting, foamies, difficulty eating aren’t that uncommon after surgery. Your tummy is pretty sensitive and while it usually take about 6 or so weeks to heal some take longer. But it is always best to rule out anything else. Please tell me your doctor gave you something for the nausea & is sending you for tests. If not, I’d ask (demand) an endoscope to rule out a stricture and an ultrasound to check your gall and rule out anything else (appendix, pancreas). I only had one symptom with my gall (I had a stone) and that was pain. Very strong, writhing on the bed pain upper right abdomen & around to my back. Nothing before that. I know my sister in law used to get crampy pain and nausea when she ate fatty foods or a large heavy meal with her gall. You’re certainly not eating fatty or rich heavy meals at the moment. If it is a stricture, they’re easy to fix. If you do have gall stones it would mean another surgery. Gall issues after surgery aren’t uncommon. Rapid weight loss can cause stones to grow but usually not that soon out. (Mine was 2 years and one month later.) Or you may have had them already but they’re making themselves known now.

I will definitely get onto the team and surgeon! Start weight before surgery was 21.9 , 20.9 after LRD before surgery. Lowest after surgery 17 stone, currently at 19. After surgery total loss was 3 stone 9lbs which I think isn’t great surgery was feb 2022 got to 17 stone august 2022. Then gained now stalled at 19 stone for nearly a year.

I could technically start looking now, but I want to give it a year AFTER I hit my final goal weight to see how my weight holds and how bad the fluctuations are (if there are any). I also want to give my body a rest. I have basically ZERO boobs and my butt just went and eff'd off. In a perfect world, I'd like to get a lower body lift, upper body lift, boob job, and whatever I need to correct the turkey neck I now have. HOWEVER, I don't know that I can realistically do all that. So a boob job, tummy tuck, and my neck are really my must haves. Everything else, I can work around with my clothes. I just don't want to undo the plastics by getting them too soon and then losing more weight and needing them done again. I'd rather make sure my body and weight are COMPLETELY stable before I invest that kind of money.

I think I’m entering my ‘stall’ period now. Having had numerous attempts at weight loss in the past, I know my body sulks between week 3 and week 7. I’m just beginning week 5 so the timing is bang on. My weight has gone up 1.5lbs from my lowest weight this week but it happens so I will just keep on keeping on. Once my body has got over its sulk the weight should start coming off once again. A couple of NSV this week. I don’t know about anyone else but my clothing sizes can be a bit all over the place. One size of clothing can have 3 meanings for me, depending on what it’s made of. So, for example, there’s the ‘I’m kidding myself’ sizing - plenty of give, elasticated, stretchy material. It may say 22 but I know it’s really a 24+. There’s then the ‘huh, it’s not too bad’ sizing - some give, not that stretchy, a definitely generous 22, and then there’s the ‘unforgiving’ sizing - no give, no stretch, no elasticated waist etc, a definite 22. For long enough I’ve been at the ‘I’m kidding myself’ stage but I went shopping in my wardrobe and found a couple of tops with no give, a definite 22. Tried both on - they fit!! And they didn’t look like sausage skin!! Very happy dance around the bedroom! I also went out of my comfort zone at the weekend and bought myself a size 22 no-stretch denim maxi skirt. I can fasten it, just, but don’t rate my chances of sitting down and/or breathing in it 😮‍💨 However, I’m keeping it as I know I will fit in to it comfortably at some point. We’re off to London for a few nights in 3 weeks or so, so fingers crossed it may fit a little better by then 🤞🤞 Meds have finally been sorted and delivered, had my Oximetry test last week so hopefully that’s gone well. No Bariatric appointments this week but I have my endoscopy next week plus knee X-rays for my arthritis. Food wise things are going OK. My new favourite thing is Lindhals Stracciatella Kvarg protein yoghurt - oh, I could eat barrels of the stuff! I’ve also tried the Warburtons Protein Power bread as a change to the whole meal. It’s definitely nice as a change but doesn’t want to make me eat lots and lots of it, which is a definite plus! Hope everyone has a great week… Onwards and Downwards!