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Pressure, Stress, Am I doing the right thing? My Spouse...
shellyd88 replied to magicalwoman's topic in PRE-Operation Weight Loss Surgery Q&A
You have worked so hard for a long time to get to this point and adjust to after surgery I have to say your health and mobility must come before whatever he feels if you become so big that u need assistance bathing or dressing is he willing to do that if u become ill or bedridden or can't work is he going to do everything? I hope he really is being supportive for your sake will there be changes in how you look yes there will I won't sugar coat it a lot will change and it will all be for the better u can't be very heavy and loose weight and expect not to have extra skin re ppl looking old guess what we are all getting old it's happening accept it there's is no choice eventually this will include drooping skin wrinkles etc no one escapes u can delay... Plastic surgery etc the highest form of selfishness is worrying about if someone gets healthier how it will affect him words like that are about control good luck to you -
I have a friend she was sleeved a year ago and she is gaining weight already she is always eating out and drinking alcohol I truly think she is depressed had a divorce right after surgery and many life changes. I did mention to her that she didnt go through all those hoops and almost a year of prep to gain it all back and hopefully she will do something about it.
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Weight loss so far:)
SlowlybutSurely replied to hipsnomore's topic in POST-Operation Weight Loss Surgery Q&A
Congrats! Your weight loss is awesome! But it's so strange to me how one person can lose 80 lbs in 3/4 months and another only loses 40 or so. The body is a wonderfully complicated organism! -
My husband was apprehensive too because he feared I would be unhappy or have complications. I just assured him that I really needed this help with losing weight and he's been very supportive. It's been nearly 11 months since surgery and he really enjoys the healthy meals I prepare and the fact that I'm a much healthier person. If anything, it's made him worry about his own fitness. I just had to proceed with what I knew was right for me and let him come to terms with his own issues. I have no regrets.
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He's probably worried about you and doesn't understand what it's like to be morbidly obese so my guess is he views this as unnecessary elective surgery and too extreme for your circumstances. It's understandable if you've never had a weight problem. I'd frame it to him as being worried about your health, feeling like your weight is out of your control, and wanting to make a positive change so you can do more things with your family and have more energy. Take him with you to your orientation so he can learn more about it. Having three kids he's probably worried if something were to happen to you over what he believes may just be a cosmetic and easily fixed problem. Surgery is scary. But there is plenty of proof that you'd live a longer, healthier life at a lower weight and surgery is the most effective treatment of morbid obesity. Why are you worried about your relationship after losing weight? I've told my partner that things will be better because I'll have more energy to do stuff with her and our son. I'll be able to keep up and play sports better, hike faster, won't be as afraid of flying out of a Water slide (it's a legit fear when you're very heavy and the inertia from your weight catapults you faster than you'd expect), will fit in roller coasters better... I eat less so she gets more of my food if she wants it. I share my food with our son because I can't eat it all. I used to be really grumpy about sharing my favorite foods (fat girl problems) but now I'm not at all because I get full easily. It's a weird benefit but there you go. If you make it sound like he's going to benefit from having a lighter weight spouse he may hop on board with your plan more readily just make sure he knows you take doctor's orders seriously and that you're going to take care of yourself and make sure you're prepared so the surgery is as safe as possible.
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New here/had consult last week
KatallacStrong replied to Beth47's topic in PRE-Operation Weight Loss Surgery Q&A
Hi Beth! I am new here too; I joined a few weeks back. Last week was my first consult with my surgeon as well however I have been thinking about doing this surgery for quite some time now so I am a bit ahead of schedule in regards to insurance requirements. I had my psych evaluation on 6/18 and have met 4/6 non-surgical weight-loss regimen apts; the fifth one is next Thursday and my endoscopy is next Friday. My anticipated surgery date is late August (preferred) or sometime in September. I too have struggled with my weight for as long as I can remember. I suffer from anxiety and find it hard to comprehend this decision to have surgery, but nonetheless I am SUPER glad that I have finally committed to it. -
3 MONTHS POST OP OPINIONS OPINIONS OPINONS!!!
BlackBerryJuice replied to YOLANDA240's topic in POST-Operation Weight Loss Surgery Q&A
Hmmm, it's too bad that you have to deal with these comments - I agree, it's pretty annoying. But I feel that one of the reasons that your friends are claiming you have a "bad attitude now" is maybe because your response to them can come off as pretty prickly. As irritating as these comments might be, if you want to keep these friends (which, of course, you may not! and that's totally understandable), you'd have to entertain their stupid questions and be a bit more patient. For example, this is how I'd respond to these annoying statements: Annoying friend: "You've lost your shape!" You: "One of the reasons I had weight loss surgery is because I didn't like my old shape...my new shape fits into an awful lot more cute clothes! Haha! *change of topic*" Annoying friend: "You don't need to get any smaller!" You: "This isn't so much about size for me, but more about health. I love how much lighter and more energetic I feel now that I weigh less, and it's so much easier to walk and run without all that extra weight! Did you wanna join me for a 5-hour hike in the mountains this weekend, by the way? *friend will change topic herself to get out of this offer*" Annoying friend: "You do not need to go to the gym that's why you had surgery!" You: "Exercise is very important for health and well-being. In fact, it has been shown via research that overweight people who are active tend to be healthier than slim people who are sedentary. Not only is it great for your cardiovascular system, but also your mental function and your moods. Would you like to go for an hour-long run with me this evening?" Just some ideas. If you respond in such a manner that doesn't antagonize them further and is entirely logical (why wouldn't you exercise when it's so good for you!?), they'll just stop making those comments. And if they don't, then maybe it's time to find some new friends. -
7:30 am Breakfast: Atkins shake + one scoop protein powder unjury 12:00 pm Lunch: Chicken chili 2 cups (320 calories) 3:00 pm Snack: SF chocolate pudding 6:30 pm Supper: Homemade chicken pot pie with the vegies out of my garden. Im going to try to eat a very small portion, maybe a cup at most. One SF pudding. Ugh why did I have to have the pudding? lol Water: 80 0z. Vitamins: 2 tbs Liquid vitamins, 1 Calcium chew Goal: See what the scale says tomorrow, I think Im eating too much again. Its so hard to gage. How many calories can you eat a day and still lose weight?
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Thanx so much for the info. i2candoit. I called my insurance co. today and was able to get a little bit more info. from a different gal. She told me that my doctor can put in a request for me to have a specific type of weight loss surgery done if he feels that it would be of better for me, even if it is not approved through my insurance, and it is possible that it would be approved. While this is not a guarantee, at least it's better than being told that I will not be covered at all for the lap band.
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I have been working on my file since beginning of September and it was finally submitted to BCBS TX 10/22. Today they informed me that they won't even review my file regardless of my multiple comorbidities due to exclusion. My Dr. said they will appeal and they are positive I will win on approval. However, the Insurance company states nothing will change their decision. I have been fighting my weight forever, so waiting won't change much. But am I fighting a battle with them that I can't win? Any help or information is much appreciated. WAITING.......:sad:
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You are will need a weight history of 2 years that shows you were at a constant BMI of 35 for that time period. You will also have to have a 3 or 6 month diet lead by a doctor and a nutritionist. Good Luck!
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I have worked in insurance pre-authorizations before and I agree that if your employer has chosen to exclude weight loss procedures; you won't get anywhere with an appeal. The reason is your employer does not want any exceptions or they have look at them for everyone. Not encouraging news I know. . My insurance also wouldn't cover so my procedure was done with self pay. It is worth ever penny to me! Ask your surgeon's office if they have any financing options. Good luck!
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I started with calling the program. I knew my insurance would be accepted and I was certain I would be eligible based on my weight alone. I did need an insurance referral from my PCP, but that was just a simple email much the same as if I was going to the allergist or any other doctor. "I have an appointment to see _______. I need a referral." The program I went with requires you attend and informational seminar before they will even schedule you with the surgeon. The seminar route was a good way to go because it gives you a chance to see if this is the hospital/program that is best for you. I would recommend looking at more than one if possible and always seek a center of excellence. There can be differences in philosophies for each program as well as a how they handle post-op support that can mean the difference between success and frustration.
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My bf finally supports me now to move forward!
makemyownluck replied to NewAshes's topic in Gastric Sleeve Surgery Forums
Oh, that's a tricky one... plenty of people have discussed on here how this surgery affects their relationship with their bf/gfs or spouses. I can't imagine it will be easy, especially when you've both gotten comfortable with bad habits. You should start making changes now so it;s not such a shock when surgery comes around... do you have a surgery date yet? I have a girlfriend who has a similar relationship with her bf. They live together and both don't like to cook much. They eat out probably 5 nights a week - and they eat bar food at that. Pizzas, subs, fried foods... she's gained probably 50lbs in the 2 yrs she's been with him... and he stays skinny. It's not my place to tell her to stop eating like that (esp since she's still way thinner than I am - but even at my WORST I didn't eat as poorly as those two do!), but I always have the urge to tell her to slow it down! But I have my own bad habits to work on, so I TRY to keep my opinions to myself! -
This is really interesting about pcos and losing slowly. I have pcos am 5 weeks out and everyone else who had surgery the same day as me has lost almost double the weight I have. I'm also breast feeding a baby so wondering if that's making things worse. I know metformin can help with pcos symptoms and regulate hormones for pcos. Anybody know if you're allowed to take it after sleeve surgery? Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App
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This is me about a month before my surgery and probably at my highest weight of 337 lbs. -
Thank you Misty!! You are doing great. I have a question - on the tickers at the bottom of everyone's replys - does the total weight lost include pre-op loss or just weight lost since the banding? Again... thanks for taking time to answer my questions.
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For me blue cross covered either the removal or the revision due to complications. But once removed you would be starting fresh and need to be approved for the procedure.that means going through all the steps. For my revision the only thing I needed to go through was a demonstrated complication. Nothing else mattered. No BMI or weight or comorbidities needed.
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Wish I hadn't Told Some...
WalkOnWaking replied to WalkOnWaking's topic in Tell Your Weight Loss Surgery Story
My friend asked if I had lost the weight I had hoped to. Don't want to start the whole conversation up, but managed a sorta neutral reply that my overall health has improved and I am steadily losing per my surgeon. Faster than some patients, slower than others. But as long as I'm off meds and feeling great (normal blood pressure and blood sugars), I am happy. Dunno if she was fishing for ammo for the 'I told ya so' speech or was really interested. Time will tell. -
Wish I hadn't Told Some...
Pabst replied to WalkOnWaking's topic in Tell Your Weight Loss Surgery Story
I think it's like anything... ...politics, views on social issues, finances, religion. Once you have a formed opinion or stance... You tend to only indoctrinate yourself with data that supports your claim (because we are so darned smarter than everyone in the room) and you become an apologist for whatever that stance is. If you said "hey, I was thinking about getting LASIK surgery" to a guy who doesn't wear glasses and had a close friend who had a bad experience... From that moment... all that person would see LASIK is as a sight ending bullet to the head and not what it is 99.9% of the time... A simple (yet expensive) life changing procedure that lets you see. I think Bariatric surgery is the same. If you ask a thin athletic person who never stifled with being overweight and is regularly surrounded with thin likeminded people about Bariatric they will probably have prairie dog ears for all the bad and negative stories and completely ignore the success stories. Talk to an overweight person who struggles with weight loss that either is too scared of getting the procedure... Doesn't want to get it because the future limitations scare them or someone who wants it and can't afford it or can't fit it into their daily schedule... Yeah, they are going to balk at it. Talk to anyone who has had it... Even the ones that slipped up or had complications and almost almost them would say that if they could go back in time and not do it, in spite of their failures and complications they wouldn't have changed their mind. People tend to apply bias heavily based off of emotion and less on facts or compelling data. Just keep that in perspective. -
Hello Everyone, I would like to see if anyone has advice for me. I had my surgery on April 22, 2008. I lost 15lb before surgery and have only lost a grand total of 26pounds. They never explained to me that i would still be very hungry after i had this surgery. The first week after i was miserable. Ok fine i got over that. I was never able to eat chicken after the surgery ok fine i am over that. i had my first fill 6 weeks after surgery. It did nothing at all. My second and third fill was the same. I still felt hungry all the time:thumbdown: and could eat alot of food. although my choices are better i am still not loosing weight. I just had my fourth fill and i am at 7cc's in a REALIZE band. this fill has been very hard. The list of foods i CAN eat is very limited as aposed to the list of foods i can not eat. I have a hard time with eggs but if i have cereal for breakfast i am starving by 11am. I throw up alot and i dont ever feel full and i am not loosing weight. I have been eating good foods. i had eggs for breakfast, celery and cheese for snack, salad and yogurt for lunch and steak and beets for dinner. still starving. HELP!!! what do i do?
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Mine seemed a little involved as compared to some of the responses, so I guess it varies a good bit. There were questionnaires to complete before the appt. Mostly about my weight history which it was a little difficult (impossible) for me to remember all the times I have lost or gained over 10 lbs and why...because I'm 51 and have been a yo yo dieter for most of my life! At the appt I had another 457 questions on the computer (MMPI-2). My copy of the report says they used the following assessment instruments: MMPI-2, clinical interview, Shipley institute of living scale, beck depression inventory, state trait anxiety inventory, 3 factor eating questionnaire and a wt and lifestyle inventory. It all took 4 hours which included about 30-40 mins sitting in the waiting room. The psychologist said they are looking to see if you can understand the risks/benefits of surgery, have some type of support available, current or hx of addiction, etc. The surgeon let me choose from several providers in the area. I looked for someone close so if I need to see them again in the journey, I could. I don't think I will, but you never know. The article they gave me to read before the appt recommend asking the psychologist what they thought might a challenge for me after we talked, etc. The article also recommended asking for a copy of their report. I asked about the challenges and she said she thought I was a good candidate for WLS. Said, in general, people sometimes struggle if they have complications or if they did not fully understand the dietary restrictions/requirements. Fair enough. She offered to send me a copy of the report. It came in the mail about 2 weeks later. It seemed to be a good reflection of what we talked about at the appt. I guess it's human nature to worry a little about a "psychological" evaluation, but dont sweat it.
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Tips on Kicking Sugar to the Curb?
VSGAnn2014 replied to It'sMeAnonyMouse's topic in POST-Operation Weight Loss Surgery Q&A
I can totally understand your amazement and believe that you've seen a great reduction in pain throughout your body after kicking the sugar / starch habit. Prior to WLS, I started dialing down on the sugar and, of course, post-op, it was completely gone from my diet for almost a year. Pre-op I had suffered terribly from osteoarthritis in my knees and had taken 2 Aleve for the pain for decades. And, as you probably know, sleeve patients aren't allowed to use Aleve (or other NSAIDs) on a daily basis post-op. So pre-op I weaned myself off of those, too. Since then I've lost 100 pounds. Even before I'd lost all that weight it was obvious that my knee pain was going away. Honest to God: my knees now feel far, far better without any Aleve than they did pre-op when I was taking Aleve. And get this: My PCP told me at my annual physical last fall to forget about the knee surgery we were planning on me having in a year or so. "You don't need it anymore, so let's not schedule it. If your knee pain comes back, we'll consider it again." Pain is caused by inflammation. And sugar (and other things -- depending on your own body's unique response to specific foods, drugs, etc.) causes inflammation. Ergo, no pain. Ergo, no knee surgery. -
Coming back after almost a year!
jmar23 replied to garciagiss's topic in Gastric Sleeve Surgery Forums
Congrats on the weight loss first off. Secondly, Stalls happen... of course with that said I'm gonna say what you already know which is don't give up! Get back to the proper eating and drinking habits. I think that is your first step. Other than that have you tried going back to the liquids only to try an kickstart your weight loss? I've read on here that this can help with the stalls. Most of all though don't give up! -
Pre-surgery Counseling Approval
dm5201 replied to Michsha's topic in PRE-Operation Weight Loss Surgery Q&A
Go to another psych doctor that is familiar with weight loss surgery! Get the heck away from that person and get on with the life you want!
