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Don't limit yourself and your happiness on their behalf. Your friends should love you no matter what you look like. Maybe you losing weight is making them consider their life choices. The fact of reality is that people change, always. I expect my friends to embrace the change, as I do with all of their life changes. This journey can be super tough, as you probably know, and that's why it's SO important to surround yourself with positve, supportive people.

That's great!! I still think you're doing well, but it's good that you have that attitude, because that will keep you on track the rest of your life. Even when the weight is gone you will have to have this same mindset. Good for you!! God bless your journey!

i have posted a few questions in this week since joining the forum. This is my first forum experience. I just want to say to all who has responded to my questions, that you have been such a wonderful source of support. I am truly appreciative of your comments, suggestions, advice, knowledge and sharing. I am amazed by how much knowledge people have and feel I can certainly rely on this site as providing me with good advice. It is so encouraging to hear stories of remarkable success. On the other hand, it also points out my need to perhaps take things a bit more seriously. I certainly don't have much knowledge about nutrition and have not been counting anything and have not been exercising. So now I realize that I must improve and I do feel encouraged to do so. I will take my weight loss more seriously and continue to learn from what others post. It really does make me realize how I have to do more. ie. I wasn't taking Vitamins and see from others that this is to be part of the daily routine. (I simply could not stand those chewable ones. ) Thanks again to all who have replied to my questions. I truly have benefited from your advice.

No. I dont know if you remember but in the recent Melbourne Marathon there was a team event and Andy was looking for participants here. I emailed him and said I'd love to be a part of it, but anyway, after I'd gotten all excited it turned out he'd organised coverage on Today Tonight, which is a current affairs program on over here. I didnt want to let him down, but aside from not having the time to commit to group training, I really did not want to be on television. I didnt want people who've known me in my past, say ex colleagures, see that over the years since I'd left work I'd gotten fat as a house and had weight loss surgery. I truly dont mind people knowing now that I've had WLS, but I"m much much shyer about the fact that people who never knew me as fat would find out that I got fat, if that makes sense. And whilst I hope the story was motivational to people, I really didnt care to hand over creative control to the media, especially to a show that's notorious for scandalous and inflammatory journalism. It could have been presented in any way and I'd be helpless to control it. No thanks. So I did the run on my own, went in the 7.5km event. It went well for the team and I'm so glad for them but being on TV wasnt for me.

Hi everyone! Hope all is well. I was wondering if there were any Bypass vets out there who's highest weight was the in the 400's. Mine was 437LB and I just want to know how much weight have you lost and about how long did it take you to lost it after surgery? Im curious because I am 3 weeks out and have only lost 5LBS. But I am not eating hardly anything. So just curious. Thanks.

I'm about three steps behind Happy2BMe in the process. And in reality still not completely decieded if I'll do it. There are significant lifestyle changes that will need to be implemented and I'm slowly processing their impact. This site has been an excellent source of info though so I'd recommend reading and looking to see if some of your questions have been asked by others. For me a part of this is about being preventative. I weigh 265, take 3 meds and use a CPAP. I've wreastled with my weight throughout my 21 yrs of service (only once did they catch me and put me on the "Fatboy" program :confused: though). Though I'm confident I can drop weight I creeps back, and gets higher. My hope is the band may aid in being a "stop gap" when life breaks up my fitness regimen--which is normally when the pounds return. If there is a theme I've gleemed from reading various post is the band is a tool, not an end in itself. Hope this helps!:confused:

Happy NY! My "fun" was watching my husband drool on himself at (9:00pm) while my 5yr old son and I had a photo shoot spread featuring his face on fb! Woot woot talk about fun!! My goal (inspiration) is to drop a lot of weight by summer so I can at least get these pasty white legs out In the sun after being MIA for 15 years. My regret is being hardheaded in the gym and not learning that after you've been on a treadmill for 45 mins just because a "fit" girl gets on a treadmill beside you doesn't mean it's a "Instant competition" and you have to make damn sure she gets off her treadmill first (thus sparking the inside "that's what I though B fist pump" ) my Legs hurt!! Waaaah!

I'm at that point right now! I'm soo anxious I just want to get the surgery done tomorrow already! I'm sure he'll be proud of me after I lose weight and keep it off

Ola, Portuguesa! Sure it's your decision to make, but it's nice to have your family and friends' support for such a life-changing event. Have you tried explaining it to him patiently and unemotionally? You've done your research, right? Bring him some statistics. Show him that this is the most effective way to permanently lose weight. Take him to the next free seminar, or bring him with you to the doctor's appointment so he can ask his questions and get answers straight from the surgeon. I'm 55, married, with a kid....and the only person who suggested that I try again the old-fashioned way was my Mom.... who first put me on a diet 48 years ago when I was 7. Is that even rational? Our parents are just worried about surgery because they love us. Once I explained to her that I had made my decision and she needed to get on board, she did. Now she's thrilled that I've finally lost the weight. So now... get this... she tells me I'm getting too thin and need to stop. See.....? They're irrational because they love us. So just be patient with your Dad, and try to get him all the information he needs to understand why you feel you have to do this. I'll bet once he's fully informed, he'll come around. Boa sorte, amiga!!!

I have AFIB and was able to have surgery. After the surgery, my heart rate was really high and my regular medications weren’t working. I ended up in the hospital an extra week until they were able to get the rate under control with more medications. The cardiologist will sign off on the surgery if it will benefit your condition. Weight reduction should also make heart procedures safer if you need to have them in the future. I’m seeing a heart specialist next month and expect that I’ll need to have a procedure to get my heart rhythm back to normal. Hopefully January will be a good month for weight loss. Good luck to you.

You also have to consider the man you are dealing with. If they are around long enough they're going to notice the weight loss, the small amounts of food, and your eating habits.

There's no way around it, it sucks. You got the sleeve and your post-operative results were dismal. I'd be mad, sad and on my dieticians doorstep demanding help. Our little sleeve is an amazing tool but only you know what you're feeding it. I'm avoiding all carbs since my body will more readilyburn fat if it doesn't have carbs as fuel. Keep them as low as possible, substitute a Protein shake for one meal and eat mostly lean protein. Get back to basics and you'll kick-start your weight loss again. During my next stall I'm going to need very similar encouragement. Hard to see the forest for the trees when we are so invested in this process so objectivity goes right out the window! Hang in there and keep trying!

my weight loss had slowed for a few weeks but its picking up again pretty rapidly due to the calorie drop

I'm just curious I just want to know what do everybody look forward for after losing weight I look forward for being able to sit on one seat on the train and the bus Being able to shop almost everywhere And never getting to hear these words again "your pretty for a girl fat girl"

Hi everyone. I'm having surgery the end of march with dr. Pompa in Mexico through weight loss forever. Just wanted to see if there is anyone out there who has had surgery with this doctor and if you could share your experience with me Thanks

Way to go on the great weight loss! And congrats on dusting off the treadmill! Keep up the good work : ) Annette in Colorado

Melanie...let me rant for a moment about RnY. It is--after the first year or so--mostly a restrictive surgery, just like the band. I decided that since the most I ever lost with the band was about 35% of my excess weight, it would be the very definition of insanity (FOR ME) to do essentially the same thing and expect different results. That's why I went for DS (FOR ME). I know that Jossart is listed as a DS surgeon in SF, but so is Kaufmann in LA. Yet, Kaufmann essentially ignored my requests for the DS (and was a rude and arrogrant little twit in addition.) He said that banded with a BMI of 48, I "wasn't heavy enough" for the DS and tried to get me on board for the RnY. I am SO glad I went elsewhere. I am seven months post-op...I'm a "slow loser" because I'm not particularly compliant (revisons can be that way since we go into surgery #2 with attitude) and I'm down somewhere around 86 pounds, WHICH IS ABOUT 60% OF MY EXCESS WEIGHT!! I was back into 2X's and 3X's pre-op. I'm losing all over, but my belly was the biggest, so right now I fit best in maternity pants for the extra room at the waist. I wore a pair of Gap size 14 maternity shorts to go to an activity at the beach last week. So I have CLOSE TO a size 14 ass and thighs. Good luck on YOUR decision, but don't go for any surgery YOU are not convinced is right for YOU.

Hello lessismore, I am in the same process as you. I went to the MD today and after trying for 18 months to loose wieght we desided I should have a revision. Something we have been talking about for a year although he wishes I would keep trying to make the band work. I have a choice and the revision is already approved. I am just torn about my options. I asked for the Duodenal Switch and he thought I would have a lot of problems... long term and suggested the Gastric bypass and then we talked about the sleeve. I am scheduled for August 15 at 7 am. I am afraid if I do not do the bypass piece I might regret it. Yet, I weigh 242 most days and he thinks no matter what I do I will loose 60-70 pounds which is okay for me. It was hard today because I wanted him to take the Fluid out of the band so I could eat but the last time we did that I gained 20 pounds. He would like me to keep trying and talked about only taking a small amount of saline out and that we might hit the magic spot. I agreed because unless I wanted the band removed and no more wls he was clear loosing more weight would be ideal and that gaining so was not an option. I ended up falling apart after the appointment. I don't cry often but today I did. I am so disappointed that the band did not work for me and that I have struggled so hard with only lost 60 pounds. Now, I will face another surgery. I am torn about which one. I am so tired and I feel so discouraged most of the time but I will move forward. The doctor suggested I might be consuming more calories than I think. I offered to write it all down and let him take a look next time we meet. It seems the story of my life is someone saying are you sure your not eating more...are you exercising.... He was nice about it but it was hard for me. So for me I am facing surgery a week before school starts for my two girls and then my son goes a week later to preschool. The timing is a bit off but I am really tired of not eating and not loosing weight. We were going to put it off until they were settled in but not eating is really shoving me over the edge. If I am going to suffer I should at least be loosing weight. It is so funny because I am doing all this so I can get a hip replacement. I just want to feel better and be better for my family. I want a better quailty of life. Take care, Taylorrae9

First, EVERYONE is different. Especially men vs. women. So comparing to your husband is asking for frustration. That said, no, I wouldn't consider 30 pounds in a year a great success. I'm not trying to be harsh! It's awesome that you've lost 30 pounds but obviously you didn't remove most of your stomach for a smaller result. Yes, LOG YOUR food. Do it. If you don't you slip into denial about what you're really eating. Track everything - even a single jelly bean should go into your food log. If you don't do this, you have no idea how many calories, carbs, etc. you're eating. Get your metabolism tested if possible. If not, simply adjust your calories downward from 1200 until you start losing and hang there until you need to adjust again. I was told over and over again that my basal metabolic rate was close to 2000 calories and that on a 1200 calorie diet I'd lose two pounds a week. In reality, after testing we discovered that I have a highly efficient metabolism (curses!) and my BMR is actually less than 1400 calories a day. That means that on a 1200 calorie diet, I can reasonably expect to lose just over a pound a month. So, if you can get tested with the breathing test, DO IT. If not, just track calories for a few days and then fix what's wrong. Not everyone carb counts but I suggest that if you're not active you keep them on the lower side. There are dozens for free sites that allow you to track your food. So do it. Honestly. There is no better thing you can do to control you intake. I'm not an exerciser and firmly believe that while exercise is good for your body and can reshape it, that it doesn't always help us lose weight. But being more active is always a good thing so please try to work more activity into your daily routine. Even simple things like taking the stairs, parking farther away and enjoy a walk will help you feel better mentally and physically. If you want exercise to help you lose weight you have to really bring it - you can't fool around with a 20 minute walk every day and expect it to do much. If all else fails, do the pouch test. Reassure yourself that your sleeve is still working, break the bad cravings and jump on board. Only you can do this. You need to evaluate why you're not losing and what's going on in your head. If you "reset" and still can't lose, get a barium swallow to reassure yourself that your sleeve is still there and in good shape. But honestly, in almost all cases it comes down to us not doing the head work and having to accept that we need to change to lose weight. I've had to reset a number of times myself, so I understand this. Take care and I wish you the best! ~Cheri

Hey everyone, I have been very successful with my weight loss, went from a bmi of 43 to 21.5. Was doing about 1000 calories, but my blood pressure keeps getting lower, and my doctor is starting to think it might get to a level of concern so I upped my calories to 1200, I am around where I want to maintain, wouldn't mind an extra 5 lbs but am okay where I am at. For some reason now that I have upped that 200 calories I have seen myself gain a pound or two in the past couple weeks of 1200 calories. I will note my exercise has gotten screwed for a couple weeks due to being very busy, and due to a medical issue I will be our of exercise commission for at least a month. I am torn what should I do. It freaks me right out to see the scale start going the other way. On the same token I don't want my blood pressure to get too low that I need medical intervention. Any advice would be greatly appreciate.

I never thought I would complain about ANY weight loss, but I can't help but compare my weight loss with others on this site. I am two weeks out and have only lost 10 pounds. I get in about 90 g of protein and 600 cal a day which is what my surgeon recommended. I'm 5'10". I feel like doing something wrong especially when I hear about people losing 25 their first two weeks. Also, I get in my fluids and walk 30 min daily.

You look Mahvelous Dahling! More importantly is where I can hear you've lost your weight which is in your self-esteem and health departments! Fantastic journey!

@@Inner Surfer Girl hey bud sheltered life here what is the above?? thanx kathy A vision board is a tool for helping you to envision what could be/what you want your future to look like. At its simplest, you can cut out pictures, words, phrases, and other images from magazines/print materials, and paste them onto a piece of poster board or paper. It is a creative way to gather thoughts and inspiration. For instance, related to weight loss surgery, you could cut out photos of activities you would like to do, clothes you would like to wear, places you would like to go, inspiring quotes or ideas, etc. Whatever motivates you is a good tool. Hope you make a truly inspiring vision board for yourself.

I am facilitating a vision board workshop this week so I would love to hear about your experiences using this technique related to your weight loss journey. I have been thinking about making one but haven't made it yet. Have you made one? Has it been helpful for you?

I have never done it, but it seemed like in Weight watchers one of the techniques was kind of similar. I don't gravitate toward "creating" this sort of thing, but i do alot of internal visioning. I read a book called "That winning feeling" and it was about using visualization and words to create the reality we want. it was about sports, but can be applied to anything. For example, a golfer can mentally visualize and practice a "perfect swing" way before, and way more consistently than they can physically do it. So the use of the visualizations combined with the physical practice is a proven way to enhance skills. I used it to overcome fear after a horseback riding accident - consistently visualizing the outcome that i wanted. I think I did this in weight loss too, but maybe not as consciously. I had no idea how I would turn out so to speak after losing all that weight, but I would visualize how my riding would be as a fitter person, i visualized dancing, hiking and other things that i couldn't/wouldn't do when I was obese. I do think that helped because it kept me focused on the REASON to keep my fitness at the top of my priorities.