Search the Community

Congratulations to all NSV'ers. My own news in this department is that I have gone a while now without eating at night. This has been a central problem in my life. It has caused me to isolate, lie, and cultivate guilt, anger, frustration and despair. It has blocked me from establishing any substantiol, long lasting spiritual connection. Of course it has also contributed greatly to my continual weight gain over the years. For me the answer has been a spiritual one. I need to feel that I am not alone – that there is an entity out there (and not only out there- all around me) that can help me; that I am accountable to and from whom there are no time-outs and no secrets. When I lie in bed at night, I try to sense God's presence all around me – in the breeze, the blankets wrapped around me, my wife's breathing beside me, even in the shadows on the wall. That, for me, makes me feel safe and keeps me from running away and plugging up my empty spaces with food. I need to keep this connection throughout the day. For me, even though I'm no longer a member of Overeaters Anonymous, this line from the Big Book is key: "We are not cured ... What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition." I don't intend to proselytize – this is just what works for me.

Thank you for the kind words. I wrote this once but apparently it got lost somewhere in cyberspace. The worst part of the TT was not being able to exercise. The first week or so I wasn't hungry at all...then watch out. I felt like I could eat ANYTHING and EVERYTHING. My PS has me on low carbs because for me carbs=swelling. That is how I have managed to keep my weight down. Low carb always worked for me. My PS said to expect a 4-5 pound weight gain because of the lack of exercise. Of course for me that was completely unacceptable so I pushed myself on walking and dieting to not gain the weight back. So far I am fluctuating between 140 and 150. Yes that is BIG swings. When I eat low carb I am around 140...when I don't...well you get the picture. I figure I will be able to go back to more carbs when I start running. I don't eat processed carbs just my Kashi go Lean, WASA crackers, whole wheat bread, and yes...my downfall...popcorn! Congrats on the running. You will be running your 5k on my bandiversary. I am not sure how I am going to Celebrate but it won't be with food! I will be visiting my family in WA without my wonderful DH who has been stuck to me like glue since my surgery. SO perhaps I will sneak out and run a 5K to celebrate! Shhhh...don't tell but I ran 1 mile this morning and it felt FABULOUS. Uggghhh...I missed running soooooooooo much.

I was also on Depo about 8 yrs ago. My doc advises against going back on depo because of the weight gain and recommended an IUD. I've convinced my husband to get a vasectomy instead. :thumbup:

Hi Sarah, I have been reading thru your thread and am so sorry to hear about your difficulties! I hope things are a little better for you now...please don't get hung up on the water weight gain...you know as well as I that it is only water and will be gone shortly. What does Huy have to say about what has happened to you? Is is common? I really liked him a lot and am looking forward to having him for a surgeon. I know you are further North than I, the storms have passed and it actually a little brighter....Please take care of yourself and God Bless. Kimberly

Hi All!! My name is Lisa Marie, but you can call me Lisa... I am 27 years old and currently live in Las Vegas , NV. I like most of on here have struggled with my weight. I have tried every diet, diet pill and starvation to lose weight. I did at one time lose over 100 pounds while I was on the Aktins diet. However, I learned that once I put a peice of bread in my mouth it would be hello weight gain. LOL I am tired of hearing people tell me, "OMG if you lost weight, you will be gorgous, etc. " I am tired of my weight being the topic of discussion with my "skinny" friends. I just want to be healthy and happy and maybe find love, is that too much to ask for? I want to shop at "regular" stores and not have to spend double the amount of money on a pair of jeans.. LOL anyways.. I am scheduled for surgery August 8th, 2008. So 8-8-08 is my day where my second chance begins. I had my seminar July 9th, went for blood work and EKG on July 23rd, was approved July 30th and hello August 8th. :Banane34: :party: I am soooo excited but yet soooo scared, I come on the site and site for hours reading the forum.. and I think I am scaring myself no reason. Anyways, I am to a huge GIANTS fan and can not wait for the season to begin.. We are taking it all the way again this year!!!!! Well I am excited to get to know everyone during this life long changing journey! Hope everyone has a great weekend. :huh2:

A few weeks ago I was sorting through school work and papers that came home in my fifth grader's backpack at the end of the school year and had been left in a pile. In his math folder I found this great handout: Problem-solving Top-ten List." It's intended to help students who are stuck on a math problem, but I found it to be great life advice and very applicable to eating and weight loss battles. What do you think? Top Ten Reasons For Getting Stuck in the First Place: 1. You tried to rush through the problem without thinking. We are often great at rushing into new weight loss programs and diets hoping each one will be the magic answer. Clients often tell me how they've picked programs in the past that weren't compatible with their tastes or their schedules or their preferences and that they probably knew from the beginning they wouldn't want to continue long term. 2. You didn't read the problem carefully. We don't just run into this difficulty with math problems. In many life situations, if we don't clearly understand the problem, we might choose a problem solving approach that isn't going to meet our needs. In my emotional eating programs, I encourage users to take the time to understand their unique situation. Taking the time to understand your reasons for overeating and the types of solutions that will work for you is essential to not getting stuck further down the road. 3. You don't know what the problem is asking for Again, this doesn't just apply to math problems. If we're working to solve the wrong problem, we aren't going to get anywhere. If you are struggling with emotional eating (stress eating, boredom eating, or eating when you are lonely or upset), no food plan or diet in the world is going to fix that--because it's not about the food--it's about figuring out what to do with the feelings. 4. You don't have enough information. I often tell me clients that if they feel like they aren't getting anywhere, or if they feel like they are beating their head against the wall, odds are that there is a part of the problem that isn't being addressed. The program I use with my clients devotes a significant amount of time to showing you how to collect information about yourself, about your hunger, and about your unique relationship with food so that you can solve the eating problems once and for all. 5. You're looking for an answer that the problem isn't asking for. If you overeat because you are bored or stressed or anxious or angry (or any other emotion), the problem isn't about food choice. The answer the problem is asking for has to do with finding new or better ways of responding to your emotions, your stress and your needs. The weight loss industry spends billions of dollars convincing us that if we follow a certain diet we will be beautiful and happy. Food plans don't create happiness and diets (or weight loss) don't help us cope with stress (or anxiety or loneliness or boredom). A schedule of when and what to eat (a diet) doesn't prepare us for what to do when we stop using the schedule, and it doesn't help us figure out what to do INSTEAD of eating or overeating. The truth is that diets aren't the answer for this problem. Enduring change and enduring weight loss happen when we make changes that work with our lives--not when we try to maintain behaviors that leave us hungry and grumpy and feeling like we are missing out. 6. The strategy you're using doesn't work for this particular problem. I'll say it again. Diets tell you what to eat. Often, being on a diet will increase the amount of time and energy someone spends focusing on food. Diets don't teach you how to change patterns of emotional eating or overeating when you aren't hungry. They don't teach you how to feed yourself and expand your life in ways that won't leave you feeling deprived. Users of my program and participants in the groups I run are often surprised at first by how little time they spend focusing on food. The programs I offer don't count fat grams or calories or carbs because I feel it is most helpful to target the *reasons* you feel hungry and the *reasons* you eat even when you aren't. My focus is helping you GET OFF the diet rollercoaster and put food in a much smaller place in your life. 7. You aren't applying the strategy correctly. If you've been dieting for years, it can be hard to move out of the mindsets of deprivation and of blaming yourself when the diet doesn't work (even though the diet was probably doomed to fail in the first place). Using the right tools takes practice. I find that clients initially have a hard time looking at their eating patterns and their emotions without feeling the old self-blame, shame and guilt. One of the biggest benefits that clients in our emotional eating programs and groups note is being able to stop feeling guilty and bad all the time. That's huge! 8. You failed to combine your strategy with another strategy. If we try to fit ourselves into a strategy or a program instead of finding a strategy that fits and works with our specific individual situation, we're likely to get stuck. Cookie cutter eating plans and programs are problematic because we are all different. For instance, my Emotional Eating Toolbox™ program guides you to your own answers and strategies through the work you do and the answers you provide about yourself. You are encouraged to explore a variety of strategies and choose the solutions that will work for you. 9. The problem has more than one answer. There is no ONE magic cause of weight gain and there is no ONE magic answer for weight loss. People's paths for taking control of their emotional eating will be different. Once you have the basic set of tools, you will be more successful if you learn to use them in the way that complements your personality, your strengths, your struggles, and your life. 10.The problem can't be solved. This one is tough--both with math problems and with life. Emotions and tough times are real. We might not like them but we can't just wish them away. Trying to ignore or bury emotions doesn't work well in the long term either. The truth is that there is no diet or food plan that is going to help us cope with tough emotions. If we forget about the emotional part of our eating and simply focus on the food, we're going to get stuck and we're likely to fail. And then we are likely to blame ourselves--which isn't helpful either. There ARE powerful tools that can help anybody get through the emotions and situations that they struggle with. When we learn them and practice using them it's easier to put food in its place, make choices that feel good about eating, and put more energy into creating the lives we really want to be living. Melissa McCreery, Ph.D. is a Psychologist and the founder of Enduring Change Coaching. She helps her clients create and live the life they crave. She is also the creator of the Emotional Eating Toolbox 28-day Program for Taking Control and Moving Beyond Dieting. Sign up for a free teleclass about emotional eating after WLS, learn about upcoming WLS seminars and other programs or contact her www.enduringchange.com.

I'm glad to hear that you went to the doctor and are getting things checked out. It is best to get some answers. If you don't already know, prednisone will cause a temporary weight gain so don't be alarmed if you don't lose while on it.

Hi guys and gals,just thought I would post a nice happy thread to let everyone know I finally love my band! lol I was banded on 1st March 08 and have been having a few hiccups along the way..mostly with no restriction,weight gain and feeling generally like I was a failure.But......after my 3rd fill on 11th June 08,I have been having better results and feeling much more positive. I was at a low point thinking that I want going to have any success with my band,and my weight kept going up. I am finding things much more easy now.I can eat a fair amount still,I dont feel too deprived.I am much more satisfied for longer and dont think about food 24/7 like I used to! To anyone who is feeling like the band isnt helping-hang in there! It will happen!! I was helped by all the words of encouragement on here,and it takes the right adjustment and it will work!I love my band now. Good luck to everyone on their banding journey. x x

I completely agree with what you said. I also don't understand when people freak out over gaining a pound or two in a few days. There are SO many things that can contribute to a small weight gain like that......water weight, time of the month, did you just eat, have you pooped.....that it seems so trivial to me to get worked up over 1 or 2 pounds. I think these people need to step off the scale and bring it out only weekly or monthly. Now if you gained 5+ pounds in a few days, then that's something to pay attention to and make changes for.

The band *is* helping. The doctor's attitude did not help. I don't have any weight gain, it was just that the doctor kept saying that it was only a matter of time before I started making bad choices again and that it would only be natural that I would gain weight. As many people have suggested it just inspires me to prove him wrong. The staples were over my incisions. Instead of stitches to hold the keyhole cuts closed they used staples. Very clever things!

I am confused, what staples did you have? Is the band helping your or not, I could not tell. Just wondering what is causing the weight gain? could the band have slipped?

Sorry things have been hectic. We went out of town so that I could get a fill. I have been starving and not staying full for very long at all so I decided after three months of being unfilled that perhaps I should go in. I had gained some weight but I am not sure what is swelling and what is actually weight gain. But I wanted to nip it in the bud quickly. Healing is going alright. I am really REALLY swollen right now. I am also still leaking at the incision site. I have an appt with my PS tomorrow and will report back in then.

I want to say that there isn't a day that goes by that I don't look to this thread for support and encouragement.. Even if I don't post every day, I am always reading and learning from everyone. I am grateful to have found a place of acceptance and encouragement. Thank you to everyone on here for the way that we show respect and friendship... it means soo much!! Fenton- this is for you... (actually all of us) I came across this on the home page and thought it would be a good reflection for all of us as we experience struggles with ourselves at some point or another. Please read and enjoy: Get rid of your Dieter's Mentality MacMadame Published by MacMadame 07-04-2008 Get rid of your Dieter's Mentality How many of us have been "on a diet" for most of our lives? Too many, in my opinion. Not just because it's bad for our health or because diets don't work. It's bad for our mental health too. It leads to something I call "Dieter's Mentality." If you have Dieter's Mentality, you need to cut it out because it's going to sabotage your success. This is true whether or not you have had Weight Loss Surgery, are on your pre-op diet or are doing it the traditional way through diet and exercise. Diet Mentality is evil and it puts you in a bad place! What is Diet Mentality? It has four major components: 1) Putting food into Good and Bad buckets First of all, food is not Bad or Good -- it's just food. Some food is a better choice than others, but even then it's really just all food. If you are getting in enough of the essential nutrients and you account for your calories each day, you are doing good no matter if you have a bite of dessert once in a while or not. All food is bad food if you eat too much of it or only eat one kind. It's just as unhealthy to eat nothing but Protein as it is to eat nothing but birthday cake. A healthy diet is balanced and can even include a certain amount of junk food as long as it's a small amount and it doesn't trigger you into bad behavior. 2) Judging your worth by what you eat Making bad food choices does not make you a bad person. Your self-worth shouldn't be tied up in what you eat. Good people make bad choices all the time. Instead of beating yourself up when you make a bad choice, hating yourself, seeing yourself as a failure and otherwise engaging in destructive behavior, just figure out how to make a better choice next time. It's not easy to be dispassionate about your own behavior, but telling yourself that you made a bad choice and next time you'll make a better one is a good start and much healthier than telling yourself you are a bad person and you'll never lose the weight and you hate yourself. 3) Judging your worth by how much you weigh/how much you've lost this week The scale is just part of the picture. If you get too tied up in the scale, you get a distorted view of the world. Weeks where you lose are good weeks even if someone close to you died. Weeks where you don't lose are bad weeks even if you got a big promotion at work and did everything "right" in terms of diet and exercise. One of the dangers of measuring everything by your weight on the scale is that you can convince yourself that making bad choices is okay because sometimes you can make bad choices and still lose/maintain. You can also convince yourself that making good choices is pointless because some weeks you make all good choices and the scale doesn't move. But clearly making more bad choices than good will lead to weight gain in the long run. Anything thinking that leads you to conclude otherwise is destructive thinking. 4) Waiting until you are thin(ner) to start living Stop waiting until you get to goal to start living or loving yourself. Love yourself now. Live your life now. It's easy to fall into "when I lose 25 pounds, I will start..." type of thinking. It's a fine line between thinking about how you will reward yourself when you meet certain goals and putting your life on hold until you meet certain goals. Many of us have had the experience of thinking we were so fat back when we were in HS or college or a young adult and not being happy. But then we got even fatter and we look at those pictures from back then and we realize that we were actually pretty hot. In fact, we'd give anything to be "that fat" right now. Why not love yourself now while you're living your life instead of waiting until 10 years later to tell yourself how good you had it back then?

Well now this post just sent me flying into the bathroom in front of a full length mirror for stretch mark inspection! I have lost 50lbs so far and have another 50 to go. So far--I'm not seeing sagging or wrinkled skin. I have some stretch marks under my arms toward the top of my arm, some around the outside of my hips, and some toward the top outside corners of my breast. I'm not seeing any on belly or thighs. The 50lbs I just lost is "newer" weight gained in the last 5 years. I'm concerned about the next 50 because it's older weight (a LOT older!) and I'm afraid that because it's been there for a long time -- my skin won't be as elastic for that fat as it has been for the first 50.

I too love to cook and bake. I found that baking dog biscuits helps tame my desire to have flour up to my elbows, keeps me cooking without any danger of weight gain and makes all the dogs around very happy! Good Luck

Except for the weight gain, its a beautiful story...and welcome to our world...everyone needs support at some point in their life...Good luck on your journey bec thats what it really is...l think l would have gone nuts without this web site..so many caring people and so many stories..no matter what kind of day you might be having, something you read here, will cheer you up. we all basically go through the same things here..we are each others support...Welcome

Great question. This was one of my primary concerns because I have approx 100 lbs to lose. Despite my weight gain I don't have any stretch marks (had my baby at age 20 when my skin elasticity was probably optimal). However, I believe there are several factors that determine whether we will have saggy skin i.e your skin type, genes, and how active you were before surgery. But, as importantly I believe we have to stick to the high protein, high fiber, low fat diet (whatever your surgeon prescribed) with tons of water/fluids to help with elasticity.

Lelafox Like me, you're just starting on this journey. You know when you take your walks, you probably have to walk some hills before you get to the end. Those hills can be steep and hard but you have to keep walking to get to your goal. Remember, those hills eventually reach a peak and then you start going down. Just keep trucking up and working hard and when it seems you can't make it any further do it anyway and soon it will feel like a breeze. Be grateful for those hills because they make you stronger and more ready to tackle the next one. Vacations and minor weight gains are just a blip in the whole weight-loss journey. In a year, when you've reached your goal, you'll realize that. You'll be the one encouraging others on this site to keep on fighting and working through those difficult times. I've got a couple of trips coming up in the next couple of weeks and I'm not going to stress over it. If I gain a little, that's just the way it goes. Vacations are so difficult because you lose a certain amount of control, your routine changes, and your body probably is responding to the change in diet. You know, last week I was a little depressed because I didn't lose any weight for the first time, but this week I lost 6.5 lbs! I just had to remind myself what the rules were and follow them. Good luck to you. I've sent up a little prayer for you.

So it must have been the chocolate although the nurse seems to think it's carbs. I guess I got lazy. I have started keeping my food journal again to keep track of the calories, carbs, protein, and now fats. Whoever said that the lap band was the quick fix was soooo.... wrong. It's still alot of work. The journal helps to make sure not only that I'm eating the right amounts of food but by writing it down it will eventually come 2nd nature for me to chose the right amounts. It's just a constant struggle. Can't hurt to try.:frown:

After waiting for 6 weeks I finally saw the Surgeon on July 22nd. He felt I would be a godd candidate for the Lapband. He wants me to take 2 Nutrition classes, get a Psychological Evaluation, a cardiac evaluation (I have no heart problems so not sure why) and bloodwork done. He also wants me to get with my PCP and find something other than Voltaren to take for the pain. Plus I need to get with the Pain management Dr to get off of Lyrica. It seems the Lyrica causes weight gain. I already had the Psychological Evaluation this week. Next Monday I can get the blood work done and Thursday will be the first Nutrition class. I will need to call for a Cardiac evaluation and schedule the 2nd nutrition class. When the Surgeon's office has all the evaluations I will be able to see him again, get a surgery date, final insurance approval and attend the preop class. When I asked how many more weeks he stated about 6 to 8 weeks. So we are looking at a possible Sept surgery date. In the mean time on July 17th I had three Thoracic Facet Joint Injections in my spine and have been finally able to do things for the first time in over 10 years. I still have some pain but not the knife stabbing, take away my breath kind of pain. I am walking about 6 to 9 minutes with 2 canes where as before I could barely walk 1 to 2 minutes. Instead of rolling around on the desk chair in the house I am now walking. I have been swimming and in the hot tub as I can finally lift my leg high enough to get up the stairs. I have taken day trips down to Fort Lauderdale and loving every minute of the drive. I am finally living and not just existing. I just hope and pray the pain does not come back as I will be even more depressed and upset if it does. Till next time have a great journey!

After waiting for 6 weeks I finally saw the Surgeon on July 22nd. He felt I would be a godd candidate for the Lapband. He wants me to take 2 Nutrition classes, get a Psychological Evaluation, a cardiac evaluation (I have no heart problems so not sure why) and bloodwork done. He also wants me to get with my PCP and find something other than Voltaren to take for the pain. Plus I need to get with the Pain management Dr to get off of Lyrica. It seems the Lyrica causes weight gain. I already had the Psychological Evaluation this week. Next Monday I can get the blood work done and Thursday will be the first Nutrition class. I will need to call for a Cardiac evaluation and schedule the 2nd nutrition class. When the Surgeon's office has all the evaluations I will be able to see him again, get a surgery date, final insurance approval and attend the preop class. When I asked how many more weeks he stated about 6 to 8 weeks. So we are looking at a possible Sept surgery date. In the mean time on July 17th I had three Thoracic Facet Joint Injections in my spine and have been finally able to do things for the first time in over 10 years. I still have some pain but not the knife stabbing, take away my breath kind of pain. I am walking about 6 to 9 minutes with 2 canes where as before I could barely walk 1 to 2 minutes. Instead of rolling around on the desk chair in the house I am now walking. I have been swimming and in the hot tub as I can finally lift my leg high enough to get up the stairs. I have taken day trips down to Fort Lauderdale and loving every minute of the drive. I am finally living and not just existing. I just hope and pray the pain does not come back as I will be even more depressed and upset if it does. Till next time have a great journey! If you noticed the date, this was written in 2008. It is now 2015. The pain came back in a matter of months and the weight went all the way up to 390. I am starting over again in 2015 to be approved for the sleeve. So anything after this date is my journey for the second try at WLS.

shauna - i did not start losing till month 4 (20lbs previously). just keep doing what your doing - it' will come *** btw, i got that same advise after putting out a question similar to yours &&&& was PISSED - but it's true.*** i too had female issues that helped along with the weight gain, along with having a problem of putting down the fork. our start & goal weights are not too far off - focus on future health, with food & exercise and i promise it will come. i wish you well!!!

So I was having issues with heartburn and acid reflux over the last month or so and I was really starting to get concerned. I called my doc and had to wait a week and a half for an appointment since he was on vacation, but I wanted an x-ray because I need to see if something was wrong with my band. When I got to my appointment, he didn't want to x-ray me because he said I had all the classic symptoms of being to full. He actually showed me a chart and sure enough, every symptom I had was on it under the category of "too full." I couldn't believe that I had never seen that chart before. If I had, I wouldn't have gotten so worked up and worried. Anyway, he took out the 1/2 cc I got back in March and I felt better by the end of the day and haven't had any symptoms since. He said I might gain a couple of pounds since he loosened it but it would level out and he'd see me again in a month to readjust if necessary. I thought I'd post this in case anyone else is having the same symptoms I was having. Your band may be too tight. Symptoms were: Heartburn on and off all day, night cough or occasionally choking on your spit at night, acid reflux, regurgitation of food, weight gain or no weight loss. It also modifies how you eat because you will automatically gravitate toward unhealthy choices because you start eating what doesn't hurt. So, please don't let your band get too tight and ignore the symptoms. Long term and they can be dangerous.

Georgia, Hope your ankle is feeling better real soon. I'm really glad you are listening to your body and not pushing yourself to a more serious injury. Whosya, That is awesome about your daughter. You must feel very good about the changes you have made and how they have affected your family. You GO!!! Bonnie, I completely agree with you about your son. I was a very thin kid. I ate and ate and ate, but I was very active. My weight gain started at the end of high school when I was no longer in sports, etc. I slowed down and the trouble began. I want to teach my kids good eating habits so the same thing soesn't happen to them. My son is very thin, and gets frustrated at times because I make him eat "healhty" food. He will say "But mom, I am healthy, so I can drink a coke".. Well, healthy is not a weight, it's a lifestyle. I don't believe little kids should "diet", but I do think America as a whole is do a poor job of educating our children on health and nutrition. Ok, soapbox over. Bonnie, I thnk you are right on!!